


through rose colored glasses

by SidewaysClarinet



Series: to see the world [1]
Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bad Handling of Trauma, Developing Friendships, Family Dynamics, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Manga Spoilers, Multi, Plot takes priority over romance, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Section 13 (Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist), Shiro Lives But At What Cost, Shiro lives!!, allusions to experimentation, suicidal character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:01:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 23
Words: 133,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24226288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SidewaysClarinet/pseuds/SidewaysClarinet
Summary: By some miracle, Shiro wakes up after being possessed by Satan and finds himself alive- sore, missing a few fingers, but alive.The only one who knows what happened that night is Rin himself, and he wants to take Rin's word for it when his son says that Satan abandoned his body to save it for later. However, the threads of Rin's tale are quickly unraveling, and people are becoming more suspicious. There's something not making sense about Shiro's survival, about the Kurikara, the truth of the night he was possessed. The forces of Gehenna and Assiah alike are demanding answers, and when their damning fingers turn to Rin himself, the lies begin falling apart to reveal something far darker underneath.
Relationships: Kirigakure Shura/Original Female Character(s), One-sided crushes - Relationship, Past Fujimoto Shiro/Yuri Egin
Series: to see the world [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1841746
Comments: 395
Kudos: 479





	1. a sword, a deal, and a glass of water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For new readers: Hello! Thank you so much for dropping by! I just wanted to post a quick PSA- the first few chapters were written a year before this fic was initially posted! And so, while the first chapter has been revised (and still somewhat maintains my same writing style from a year or so ago), the chapters following this up, until chapter 4-5 I believe, have been completely rewritten!
> 
> So I would like to encourage you to read both chapters 1 and 2, before making initial judgements! An odd request to ask, I know, but I would very much appreciate it! My writing style has changed quite a bit between those two chapters lol!

_“Okuuuuuuumuraaaaaaaaa~ Sorry about this morning, yeah? You okay?”_

_“Hey, maybe your brains’ll end up spilling too!!”_

_“Now, let us set forth.... Lord Satan awaits us!!”_

_“Born of a human impregnated by a demon- and not just any demon.”_

_“You are the son of Satan.”_

_————————————————————_

Rin could feel his heart beat crashing in his ears like thunder, breath coming in so quick he couldn’t even tell if he was inhaling or exhaling. Fear- raw, unadulterated fear made his limbs tingle painfully and his stomach twist into gut-wrenching knots. Blue flames danced in the corner of his vision, but the heat did nothing to deter his deranged father from dragging him back towards the door summoned on the floor. 

No, that- that _thing_ wasn’t his father! His father didn’t grin with teeth too big for his jaw, didn’t laugh so hysterically, didn’t rip his fingers from his own hand and use the blood to summon a _demon gate literally from Hell!_

He scratched and beat frantically at the iron grip that dragged him by his shoulder, but it was like hitting a brick wall. His dragging feet did absolutely nothing to even slow down the monster that possessed his father’s body. Hell, it seemed like his struggling only made the monster laugh harder. 

His eyes widened as his shirt was jerked, and suddenly he was weightless, flying back until his back hit something slimy and _wriggly_. A shocked cry tore its way from his mouth, tears pearling as his eyes widened. Panic ripped its way through his body again, and his head snapped up to look at what should have been his father, and what was instead a bleeding, grinning caricature of the man who’d raised him. 

“ **You exist in the world of Assiah,** ” The monster was saying, voice warped and screeching like metal tearing in two. “ **And yet you bear the blood of the God of Gehenna!** ”

None of it made sense to him! Gehenna? Assiah? They didn’t even sound like the same language, much less something he’d ever heard of! He didn’t know anything of what the hell was happening, except one thing- his father was dying, and alarmingly quick. Blood poured from his hand and every orfice on his face: ears, nose, mouth, fuck, even his eyes!

The monster cackled, throwing its head back in his glee. “ **You are exactly what I need to make Assiah mine!!** ”

And in that moment, Rin felt like time had frozen. 

Anguish made the tears spill down his cheeks. His heart pounded in his ears as he looked at Fujimoto. There had to be something he could do! Demons, demons- what did he know that wasn’t just some church type bullshit? Nobody ever said demons existed for real! What the hell did demons want?!

Horror rose near as potent as his fear. He had to think of something. He needed something, anything to buy time! Maybe- maybe a trade? Demons liked that, didn’t they? He could trade something! He could make a deal!

He couldn’t. They would hate him for it!

But- but, he had to. He had to. 

There was no other choice. 

Reality snapped back with the roaring laughter of the monster, the crackling of fire and the screeching of the gate he was trapped in. Rin sucked in a breath and grabbed at the edge, trying to stall his descent for even just a second. 

“Wait!” He cried, scrabbling at the edge. “Wait!!”

“ **You aren’t getting out of this, son of mine!** ” Satan screeched, giggling manically. 

God, he couldn’t breathe, could barely speak! “I don’t want to! I-“

He gasped in another breath, raspy and shaky with a sob as he looked up at his father’s ruined body. Shiro would hate him. He’d hate Rin for what he was about to do, but...

He’d rather Shiro hate him and be alive, than love him and be dead.

“ _I want to make a deal!”_ Rin shouted, eyes squeezed shut as his fingers slipped from the gate. 

There was a terrifying moment where the goo, whatever the hell it was, covered his mouth, muffling his scream as it oozed over his nose and eyes. He couldn’t feel the edge anymore, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t feel anything but the sword in his hand. 

He could see something then, something blurry that quickly took shape. He could see- land. A rolling wasteland of purple dirt and black grass, standing out sharply against a blood red sky. Blue fire roared sky high, a horrible symphony against the agonized screeching of tortured sounds trapped deep within the flames. 

His breath stopped altogether, and he would have sworn on his life that his heart did too. Dark, twisted creatures of all shapes and sizes lumbered across the land, some the size of rabbits, some the size of skyscrapers in the city that touched the clouds. Some weren’t even whole, walking around with body parts severed and bleeding as they picked up smaller demons and ate them alive, still screeching and struggling. Some had eyes bigger than himself, some with teeth dripping saliva, some with limbs bright red from skin and muscle torn off-

And then something grabbed his hand. 

The world he saw disappeared, and suddenly he was in the monastery. His chest ached with the sudden slam of his heartbeat. He couldn’t even move his body. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t get a damn breath in, his lungs heaved in air but it wasn’t enough. 

There was a giggle, a short burst of laughter, and he looked back at who had grabbed his arm. The monster grinned back at him, _Satan_ grinned back at him. 

Satan ruled that world, those demons...?

“ **You’re ballsy, I’ll give you that!** ” Satan hummed, giving him an appraising look. “ **Hell, I’ll toss you an olive branch. What’s this deal of yours, huh?** ”

He had no choice. 

He had to. 

————————————————————

When Shiro opened his eyes again, he truly was shocked that he didn’t see the golden gates of heaven before him. 

What he saw wasn’t soft clouds and the kind gaze of angels, maybe even a couple of big-boobed spirits, but instead a blurry view of the monastery ceiling. His body was numb, and in his ears was an odd ringing noise not unlike the continuous chime of a bell. He blinked back the fuzz in his eyes and felt dazed, and couldn’t help but wonder what in the _hell_ had led to this. 

His memory trickled back slowly, visions of a boy possessed by Astaroth, a desperate run back to the monastery, handing the sword to Rin, and the argument, and then.... Satan had possessed him, hadn’t he? Satan really had managed to possess him. He shivered, feeling like ants were crawling under his skin. 

He never, ever wanted to experience that again. 

But, he shouldn’t even be alive after that, and yet, here he was. 

His sense of feeling came back first, slowly, like water dripping from a tap. Shiro felt an ache akin to that of an overworked muscle, spreading from his chest to the very tips of his toes. The ache centered on the fingers of his right hand, intensifying to a painful burning feeling that seemed to focus at his knuckles. He leaned his head to the side, and as his eyes landed on his hand, he vaguely noted to himself that there should have been five fingers there. His knuckles, torn and bloody, still dripped blood lazily, and he realized that he could taste it on his tongue, too. 

He managed to lift up his left hand, feeling numbly at his face. Something wet greeted him underneath his eyes, and he pulled his hand back to see blood coloring his finger tips. He felt his ears, and saw the same. He licked his upper lip, and tasted blood from his nose. Clear marks of possession by a powerful being, no less than an upper demon king if this was the type of damage it had managed to wreak on his body. 

So how was he alive?

Shiro noticed then that the ringing was growing louder, not fading as it should’ve, turning to a high pitched whining noise. They didn’t have a dog, did they? He didn’t recall Rin bringing one home recently. 

With a pained groan, he lifted his head up, and it took him more effort than he would’ve liked to admit to lean his upper body up. His muscles ached and pulsed terribly, and blood dripped anew from his nose from the effort. He rested for a moment- a long moment, really, calming his breathing. His vision was still blurry, and he reached up to pat at his chest for his glasses. His left hand tapped against the cord on his chest, and he traced that down until he found his glasses, dangling by the near shredded string roping them around his neck. He slipped the red lensed glasses on his nose, and was finally able to see. 

Though he almost wished he hadn’t.

He was in the main chapel, where he remembered withdrawing the Koma sword. Across one wall were deep gouges, easily discernible as claw marks. Following those gouges were streaks of blood, growing darker and bigger as they trailed to a place somewhere behind him. 

One trail ended at his dismembered knuckles.

There were scorch marks, too, blackened sections of the floor in the shape of his own foot print, burned footsteps leading towards-

_Rin!!_

With a bolt of fear that immediately swept aside his pain, he scrambled to his feet, ignoring the pulsing ache of his body. He searched around the room, eyes darting from wall to pew to floor as he turned on his heel until he saw a body, one curled on the other side of the room. The Koma sword lay sheathed next to him, weak flames twisting on the sword’s scabbard. It took him a minute, a long few seconds to realize that the figure on the floor was Rin, curled up into a ball with his hands white knuckled in his own hair. 

Shiro could feel an echo of Rin’s own distress, his soul aching at Rin’s wide eyes, wide with fear, complete and utter terror that he’d never seen on his son’s face before. The keening noise was what broke him from his daze, the high pitched noise that came from his son’s mouth as he wailed like Shiro had never seen before. 

In barely a few seconds, Shiro was at Rin’s side, grabbing Rin and pulling him up. He pulled his son up into a hug, so tight he thought for sure there’d be bruises around Rin’s torso the shape of Shiro’s arms. His son didn’t need any time to recognize him, his crying redoubling as his hands moved to grip Shiro’s shirt, fingernails ripping through the fabric in an effortless kind of way that should have scared him. Shiro didn’t care. The damn shirt could go to hell, could burn to ashes for all he cared. 

“I saw.”

“What?” Shiro realized only then that Rin’s wailing had faded to words, warbled and hollow as he gripped so tightly. Shiro released Rin only for the brief second it took to take his son by the face, his left hand cradling Rin’s cheek as his thumb wiped away the tears. Rin looked up at him, and his bright blue eyes had dulled, colored dark even as wide as they were. Tears made a continuous stream through the blood and dirt caked on his cheeks, but Rin sat unblinking. His words fell like the toll of a funeral bell. 

“Gehenna.”

Numbness suddenly spread throughout his body, though it was brief, quickly replaced by a horror he didn’t think he’d ever felt so intensely before. Rin had seen Gehenna, had seen something no human could hope to, and it had reduced his son, his vibrant, lively son, to _this_. 

Rin had seen Gehenna, but what had he _seen?_

Shiro heard the sound of laughter, so soft he’d almost missed it. He looked around the room in a flash, and even if he didn’t stand a chance against Satan, he would damn well try his hardest. But, no one else was in that room. No one else besides- besides Rin. 

“Please,” Shiro murmured, and reached a hand up to hold Rin’s face. It was if he was touching stone, for all that his son reacted, even as his thumb stroked his Rin’s cheek. “Rin- come back, kiddo.”

He watched with bated breath as Rin’s fingers curled around his hand, and then Rin’s lip was trembling. His son looked up at him, and he realized then that Rin was really looking _at_ him. His blue eyes were wide, so wide and so young, and never in Shiro’s life had it hit him this hard that Rin was fifteen. Only fifteen. He was a child, and like a child his lower lip trembled, and Shiro knew the water works were coming even before the sob fell from Rin’s lips. 

He hugged Rin again, held him close as his son cried. In some way, it almost didn’t feel real. Shiro felt like his body was there but his mind wasn’t, and even as he clutched Rin, he felt numb. Rin had seen Satan’s possession first hand. On his _father._ He’d seen Gehenna itself. A feat that no one, save the demons themselves, could accomplish. 

And for his son, his boy, raised human as he was, to see the world of demons itself? What could he do? What could he say? He couldn’t even begin to comprehend- oh, God above. 

Shiro hugged Rin as tight as he possibly could, because there was nothing else he could do. 

The other priests from the monastery trickled back in slowly, over what felt like an eternity as the sun rose. 

Rin hadn’t fallen asleep at any moment during that time, hadn’t even closed his eyes, just stared blankly at Shiro’s chest as the room slowly filled with light. Shiro hadn’t let go of Rin even once, he held Rin as tightly as he could and shushed him quietly every time the tears started anew. His son had jumped at every noise, flinched at every creak of the floor boards, gripped Shiro’s shirt with every voice and murmur that drifted through the window from the wandering people outside. 

There was a moment when someone outside had laughed, and Rin had stopped breathing, his hands slapping over his ears desperately. 

Nagatomo had been the first to come back, and Shiro gritted his teeth as the man threw the door open and started shouting for the two of them. Rin had startled at the booming voice, hands covering his ears and nails digging into his own head so harshly that he drew blood. Shiro quieted him, his left hand brushing gently through the tangled mess of his son’s hair. Nagatomo couldn’t have known to be quiet, but damn it all, did he have to shout so _loudly?_

“Father Fujimoto!”

Nagatomo’s voice grew louder and more frantic as he got closer, the sound of slamming doors following him. Rin’s hand turned to scratch at his ears as he whined, and with a muttered curse, Shiro reached up to grab one of Rin’s hands. His son gripped his fingers tightly, so tightly that for a second Shiro almost feared that Rin would break them. Man, that would suck- one hand dismembered, the other broken in too many places to count. Luckily, Rin’s grip relented just barely as Shiro rocked him, his arm holding Rin close. 

The abrupt crashing of the door startled even Shiro, his eyebrows furrowing as Nagatomo barreled in. The man’s relief was palpable as he finally saw Shiro and Rin, though whatever he was about to say was silenced as his eyes fell on Rin, cradled so tightly in Shiro’s arms. Nagatomo looked up at Shiro, eyes wide in confusion, but Shiro merely shook his head and Nagatomo’s mouth closed. 

A sense of realization seemed to pass over the man’s face, and his expression quickly changed from relieved to dismayed. He was smart enough to realize not to move closer, instead motioning back towards the door. 

“I’ll go get the others,” He said quietly. “Should I call medics? Police?”

Shiro shook his head again. 

“First aid?” Nagatomo tried again. At that, Shiro nodded, and with a returning nod, Nagatomo turned on his heel and walked back out. 

Shiro sighed as the room was quiet again, filled only by the sound of Rin’s short breathing. He sat for a long moment, just closing his eyes and breathing in deeply. Rin couldn’t stay in here, he knew that. Rin couldn’t stay in the same room where he’d seen his father possessed, had seen Gehenna, had realized that he really was a demon. 

He couldn’t stay, but Shiro didn’t know what it would take to move him out. Rin had calmed down since Shiro had first woken up, but he was still scared, more terrified than Shiro had ever seen him. It didn’t take a genius to realize that he wouldn’t want to move, but he needed to. As much as Shiro needed to be there for his son, there was a call he had to make, and right now that superseded anything else. 

“Rin,” He started, trying to speak as quietly as he could. “Rin, we have to move.”

His son’s breathing hitched, quickening as he gripped Shiro’s hand. The priest sighed again, leaning his head back to look at the ceiling. As expected. Still, they had to move, but how? 

He could hear another voice now, one much softer and quieter than Nagatomo had been. Shiro’s eyebrows furrowed as he recognized it- what in the hell was Yukio doing here? Yukio’s quiet voice conversed quickly with Nagatomo’s louder voice, and there was a moment of silence as Nagatomo explained something. It must have been a quick run down of what had happened, because seconds afterwards he heard Yukio’s footsteps, as quick as he could without running to the main hall. The door opened again, not nearly as loud as Nagatomo had been, and Yukio stepped in, eyes wide and looking panicked. 

A first aid kit was clutched in his hand, and it rattled as Yukio ran over to them and crouched by Shiro’s side. Rin flinched back, wide eyes darting up too look at Yukio- but what he saw wasn’t his twin, what he saw was a threat, something to be afraid of, even as concern twisted Yukio’s expression and he reached towards his brother. A strangled whine tore it’s way from Rin’s throat, and Shiro quickly slipped his hand over Rin’s eyes and held his son’s head to his shoulder. 

“Rin?” Yukio’s voice wavered, and he looked up with uncertain eyes at Shiro. He shook his head at his son, a despondent look on his face. 

Yukio looked as if he was about to say something more, but he was smart, and didn’t try talking to Rin again. 

Instead, he looked at his father, eyes tracing over the tracks of dried blood. He reached over to the first aid kit and opened it, immediately reaching for the sealed gauze. Shiro quickly shook his head, then pointed to the tranquilizer darts with the thumb on his injured hand. Yukio’s expression twisted with horror when he saw Shiro’s hand, but the priest insistently pointed at the tranquilizers. Yukio reluctantly grabbed one, and looked at Shiro as if it was meant to be used on him. Shiro shook his head, then glanced down to Rin, and Yukio quickly caught the meaning. 

He raised the hand with the dart and held it to Rin’s arm, to a hole where the suit jacket had been ripped. Rin let out a noise as the needle sunk in, but the tranquilizer, made specifically for Rin himself, was quick acting, and within seconds Rin had fallen slack in Shiro’s grip. Then, and only then, did Shiro let Yukio take his injured hand. Yukio began treating it immediately, and even though the blood had clotted already, he wrapped the gauze around each severed knuckle and secured it with wrapping and surgical tape. He grabbed another square of gauze and some peroxide and started wiping away the blood on Shiro’s face, much to the man’s relief. 

“What happened?” Yukio whispered as he cleared the blood, voice gentle in fear of waking Rin again. 

“Satan,” Shiro said simply, sighing. “I faltered, and he was able to make his move.”

“What?” Yukio dropped the gauze in his shock. “How did you survive?”

“I don’t know,” He confessed. He was confused himself, even now. How _had_ he lived? It didn’t make any sense. The possession should have killed him, but here he was. “By all means, I should be dead.”

Yukio shifted uncomfortably, swallowing before he picked the gauze back up. “And Rin...?”

“He knows, now. We’ll have to go through with plan B.”

“...understood,” Yukio murmured, mouth twisting unhappily. 

“He was the only other person here,” Shiro continued. “I would ask him, but...”

“What happened to him?”

Shiro grimaced. “He saw Gehenna.” Yukio’s eyes widened again. “Satan wouldn’t have taken him anywhere but the heart. I can’t imagine what he saw there.”

Yukio’s gaze drifted back over to his twin again, and Shiro could see how helpless Yukio felt. Hell, he felt helpless too. So much effort had been put into ensuring that Rin never knew about his demonic heritage, and not only had the worst possible outcome happened, but somehow it had been surpassed. Shiro never would have predicted this. 

Mephisto needed to be notified. 

“Yukio, you see that phone over there?”

His son blinked in confusion, then nodded, looking behind him to see the flip phone on the ground where Rin’s bag had been thrown. He stood up, grabbed the phone, and handed it back to Shiro, going back to his task of cleaning off the blood. Shiro moved his hand from Rin’s eyes to the phone, flipping it open and selecting the one number in it. He held it up to his ear as it dialed, going though one single tone before it picked up with a flourished “Hello~!”

“Mephisto, plan A failed.”

“Ah, dear Rin has revealed himself, has he?” Mephisto drawled, and the grin could be heard in his voice. 

“Not exactly. I was weak, and Satan took advantage of it,” Shiro sighed- it felt like that was all he could do lately. “Rin saw Gehenna, but he escaped somehow. Satan is gone, don’t know where, how, or why.”

There was a brief moment of silence, and when Mephisto spoke again, it was quiet. “Father is making his move far faster than we could have anticipated.”

“Yeah. It’s time to start plan B.”

“Yes, I do believe it is,” The demon king’s voice was lighter now. “I’m sure our young Yukio will be ecstatic to know his brother will be joining him at True Cross Academy this year!”

“About that,” Shiro started, glancing down at Rin, whose expression was tormented even in his sleep. “Rin will need time off.”

“Yes, trauma is a tricky beast all on its own,” Mephisto hummed. “Very well. Rin will join his classmates at the cram class and high school when he is deemed fit to do so.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course, of course, anything for my dearest friend!”

“Yeah, whatever, you weirdo,” Shiro breathed, and his mouth curled in what almost could have been called a smile. 

“Oh, and Shiro?”

“Yeah?”

“My condolences,” Mephisto’s voice was more serious than Shiro had heard in a while, not a single tone of mocking to be heard. “Truly. I do wish this could have been prevented.”

Shiro hesitated, then smiled a wry smile. “No use crying over spilled milk. I’ll keep you updated.”

“Will do! Auf Wiedersehen, my dear friend~!”

“See you.”

There was a click, and the call hung up. Shiro dropped the phone off to the side; there was no real need for it now. Yukio had finished cleaning up the blood, and was now looking at his brother, concern drawing fine lines into his forehead. Shiro forced a grin. 

“Hey, cheer up, kiddo. Rin will be okay.”

Yukio looked up at him, doubt and nervousness mixing in his expression. “Will he?”

For a second, Shiro was almost taken aback at the genuine wondering in Yukio’s voice.

Would Rin be okay?

“Of course,” He forced himself to say. “My boys are strong.”

Yukio breathed out a laugh, though there wasn’t any humor in it. “Sure.”

“That being said,” Shiro stretched his free arm up above his head, a symphony of cracks and pops ringing out. “Your father here is most definitely not. My poor joints are too old for this. Help me carry him, would you?”

“Of course!” Yukio leaned forward earnestly, one arm going under Rin’s knees as the other laced around his back. As slim as Yukio was, he wasn’t without muscle, and lifted his brother up with a short grunt. He stood up while keeping his back straight, and inwardly Shiro praised him. Rin’s life was probably ruined from this point on, but hey, at least Yukio had proper body mechanics, right?

Shiro managed to pull himself up shortly after Yukio did, grimacing again as his back and knees popped painfully. It was said as a joke, but man, he really was getting too old for this whole Paladin, demon-hunting nonsense. 

He sighed, looking at Yukio as his son carried Rin to their old shared room. The outline of Yukio’s shoulders was so much broader than he remembered, so much stronger than he had realized. Yukio was growing and maturing, blossoming under his responsibilities. Rin was maturing too, now, though the circumstances could never have been worse. They were growing, in more ways than one, aging, and somewhere along the line, Shiro had missed it. 

It really was getting about time for him to retire. 

* * *

Rin was still asleep by the time True Cross’s opening ceremony had started. It had been nearly three days since the incident, and as much as Yukio wanted to stay at home with his brother, he still had classes to attend and teach. He was originally just an aid for Shiro’s demon pharmacology class, but since his father was staying home with Rin, he was the stand in teacher. It made him feel guilty, deep down, that he enjoyed teaching the new page students so much, especially because of the reason behind why he was teaching in the first place. Shiro had merely smiled when Yukio told him such, ruffling his hair like he was ten years old all over again. 

“ _Rin would be proud of you, so don’t worry so much, okay?”_

Even so, he couldn’t push aside the storm of guilt and worry that assaulted him. He managed to stay focused while teaching and in his normal classes, but his evening walk home had turned into a sprint. Even though Rin was physically fine every time he left, Yukio was still terrified that he’d come home and something horrible would have happened. 

Nothing ever did happen, of course. Shiro was protecting Rin, and even if demons managed to get in through the wards, Shiro would have exorcised them. Physically, Rin was in perfect health every time Yukio checked up on him, tucked gently into his bed as an IV gave him all the nutrients he’d need. 

Despite his perfect health, Rin stayed in his coma-like sleep for days. ‘ _It’s a demonic healing sleep, a coma induced by the demon’s body to heal,’_ Mephisto had explained, the first time the headmaster came to check up on Rin. What was he healing from? Yukio always wondered. He never got any answers, because there weren’t any. Nobody knew. 

The three of them had agreed to forcefully wake Rin from his healing coma after a week if he didn’t wake on his own. Yukio didn’t like what that implied, what a forceful awakening would entail, but he knew that allowing Rin’s body to atrophy from misuse would be much worse. That didn’t mean he had to like it, however. 

As nervous as he felt about the prospect, it turned out that it wasn’t something he had to worry about anymore. During the cram class that he taught, his phone rang in the middle of the lesson, throwing off his focus and that of his students. Any other time, he would have ignored it, but Yukio immediately dropped the book he was reading aloud out of and damn near ran over to his desk. He knocked over a book and some papers as he grabbed his phone, hand flying to his ear as he answered it. 

Yukio always kept his phone on silent, muted everyone except for Shiro, and Shiro wouldn’t have called him unless it was absolutely, above all important. 

“Yes?!” His voice was frantic, panicked as he threw some papers into his suitcase, slamming it shut and locking it. 

“ _Rin’s starting to wake up. Use a key to get here, I’ll have Mephisto explain your absence.”_

Shiro hung up with a click, and Yukio abruptly threw his phone into his pocket and grabbed his suitcase, beelining for the door. 

“Ah, sensei?” One of his students, Shima Renzou, started to say, looking confused. “Everything alright?”

“Yes, start reading chapter fourteen and be ready to discuss it in class tomorrow!” He said breathlessly, closing the door behind him as he raced down the hallways. There was a door to an empty classroom just at the end of the hall, and he almost crashed into it in his haste to get there. He grabbed his key ring off of his waist and settled on a silver key, one easy distinguished from the golden ones on the ring. He thrust it into the lock and threw the door open, eyes falling on the familiar hallways of the monastery. He stripped off his exorcist coat and dropped it to the floor with his suitcase, running down the hallways as he unlatched his guns and set them on the floor too. 

He was at Rin’s room in seconds, just barely managing to control himself enough to refrain from throwing the door open. Shiro was leaned against the wall, of course, but Mephisto was there too. Yukio didn’t waste any time wondering how the headmaster had gotten there first, instead collapsing down to his knees by Rin’s bed. True to what Shiro had said, Rin was waking up. Yukio moved aside parts of the covers and gently took up Rin’s wrist, feeling the pulse intensify and quicken as Rin’s eyes began to flutter. Yukio forced himself to get his breathing under control and leaned back, hands fisting on his knees. 

It took nearly two minutes more for Rin to start moving, far longer than Yukio would have liked. He was murmuring something under his breath, but all Yukio could make out was repeating patterns of soft humming and what almost sounded like a hissing noise.

“Rin...?”

Before Yukio could even breathe, Rin’s eyes snapped open. 

Blue. 

Bright blue.

Slitted. 

Satan. 

Except... it wasn’t Satan. It was Rin, his brother who blinked again, looked at him, and let out a hoarse cry as he scrambled backwards, throwing off the covers. Yukio let out a surprised yelp as the blankets hit him in the face, followed by a thumping noise as Rin’s back hit the wall. Yukio tore the blanket off of his face and looked at Rin, then at Shiro, a helpless feeling overtaking him as Rin’s terrified visage burned its way into his brain. Shiro was frowning, taking a step forward as his mouth opened. 

“Rin-“

“Go _away!_ ” Rin shrieked, and that was the only warning they got before he burst into bright blue flames. 

Yukio’s stomach dropped to his feet as the flames washed over them. He felt a sudden burst of heat, and he squeezed his eyes shut. Despite the roaring fire, he could hear footsteps next to him. Against his will, his eyes opened, and he saw Shiro next to him. The room was colored azure with dancing flames, but Shiro stood strong. Yukio watched in shock as Shiro stepped through the wall of fire without faltering even once. His mind short circuited as the flames bent around him, not even singeing his clothing. 

Rin was baring his teeth, canines too big for his jaw and ears longer than they had any right to be. He was terrifying in his fear, a wild animal backed into a corner. Yukio’s chest ached in anguish for his brother even as his heart pounded. Rin wasn’t angry, he was scared. He was terrified out of his mind and Yukio _felt_ it. But Shiro didn’t hesitate, didn’t think twice before he grabbed Rin and dragged him into his arms. Rin growled and pushed at Shiro’s chest, but the priest held firm. 

“Rin, that’s enough,” Yukio could hear Shiro saying, gentle but firm. “You’re scaring your brother.”

The flames didn’t abate any, but for a second Rin looked up. He looked up, at Yukio, and hesitated. In the ocean of fear, Yukio could see recognition in his eyes. He could’ve cried out of relief. Rin recognized him!

The fire did dwindle then, faltering and sputtering as the biggest fires shrunk and the smallest ones burned out. Yukio reached out and took Rin’s hand, squeezing it tightly as his brother’s ears shortened ever so slightly, his canines retreating back as the blue on his arms faded. It took a minute longer for the fires to completely go out, leaving the room almost dim in comparison. Rin was still breathing quickly, damn near hyperventilating, but he was as close to normal as he’d been since the incident. 

“There you go,” Shiro murmured, his uninjured hand petting Rin’s head softly. “You’re fine, Rin. You’re safe. Everything’s fine, so chill out, okay? You’re safe.”

“Breathe, Rin,” Yukio squeezed Rin’s hand again, trying to smile for his twin. “Remember those breathing exercises they taught us in fifth grade? In four, out four?”

Yukio breathed with his brother, and pushed Shiro and Mephisto out of his mind, focusing completely on Rin. He pushed their breathing up to five second, then six, seven, and eventually eight, before Rin was able to breathe on his own. Yukio heard an appraising whistle and looked back to see Mephisto grinning at the three of them. 

“How touching,” He hummed. “Really, my heart aches.”

Yukio felt the hand around his own tighten, and looked up to see Rin staring at the headmaster. 

“Mephisto.”

Yukio’s eyes widened, as did both Shiro and Mephisto’s himself. “Rin, you know him?”

“I can say for myself I’ve never met you before that you would remember,” The demon king said, for once looking rather confused. 

“I-I heard his name,” Rin’s voice was barely above a whisper, hoarse and dry. Yukio handed him a glass of water on instinct. Rin took it with trembling hands, cradling the glass close to his shoulder. “D-Dad mentioned him, I remember.”

“That’s... entirely possible,” Shiro said thoughtfully. 

“What’s he doing here?” Rin asked, retreating close to Shiro as Yukio stood and sat by him on the bed. 

Shiro shot him a reassuring smile. “He’s here to help you out, kiddo.”

“...he looks like a clown.”

“Rude!” Mephisto huffed. “That’s no way to talk about a demon king!”

“Mephisto!” Shiro snapped angrily, head jerking to face the headmaster. 

“Oh, beruhige dich, my dear friend! You cannot expect me to believe that you would try to hide this nonsense from him any longer!”

“Well I wasn’t going to just throw it at him like that!”

Mephisto tutted. “There’s no point in complaining about it now, Shiro. Why don’t you redirect that energy to explaining all this to your darling son?”

Shiro looked back at Rin, who was still staring at Mephisto, eyes wide as a bead of sweat dropped down his temple. He had stopped breathing altogether. Shiro reached a hand up to lightly tap Rin’s cheek, and with a jerk Rin snapped out of his daze and looked at him. 

“Are you well enough for me to explain?” Shiro asked gently. Rin swallowed, and nodded hesitantly. Yukio squeezed his hand and gave his brother an encouraging smile. 

“Well, the world we live in, Assiah, is a mirror image of a world called Gehenna...”


	2. a key, a hallway, and an argument

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Back with chapter two, hopefully for your enjoyment!
> 
> I would also like to add a side note that I initially wrote the first three or four of these chapters a year ago (they've been revised, of course!) but at the time, each of those chapters was actually divided into two separate chapters before I combined them to give them a more decent length. So, they may be a bit choppy for now in terms of perspective switches and the like, but things will begin to smooth out starting in later chapters!
> 
> Chapter Warnings: Character Trauma, brief mention of drugs (none specifically, literally just the word), a few situations that could be perceived as bullying (though Suguro gets his shit dished right back at him).

Considering the circumstances, Rin had taken the revelation about the existence of demons surprisingly well. Ah, no, that wasn't quite correct, Yukio thought to himself. The existence of demons was what had uprooted them all, nearly stole their father, and left Rin bedridden, but in comparison, the existence of exorcists seemed to be received much better. Rin was quiet through most of Shiro's explanation, only asking questions every few minutes or so, but otherwise, he was quiet and still. Rin hadn't outwardly reacted when Shiro finally confessed that both he and Yukio were exorcists and had been for years, but Yukio felt that something had shifted, in that moment. Rin hadn't even looked up at the two of them once during the explanation, but it was like he could feel the distance that had opened up between them.

Shiro must have felt it too, because his dad looked up, and Yukio shared in the exhausted sort of regret in his expression. Yukio looked down at the floor, and couldn't help but wonder if becoming an exorcist was worth this. He never thought it would be a big deal to Rin, but he could see now that that was a stupid assumption to make.

Mephisto added in with a detail or two, when the silence stretched on too long, and every time he spoke, Rin seemed to tense further. He'd said he'd heard Mephisto's name form Shiro, but if that was true, why did he look so scared? He felt like there was something missing here, that Rin hadn't told them.

(Somewhere in his mind, he realized that was probably how Rin had felt for years.)

"...does all of that make sense, Rin?" Shiro asked, quiet, as the story finally drew to a close.

Rin nodded, and for the first time since he'd woken up, he leaned back and away from their father. Yukio watched as he pulled his arms free and set the glass of water aside, then hesitated, still looking into the cup.

"Can I be alone for a bit?"

Yukio blinked. "What?"

"I just-" Rin breathed out a sigh, and looked down at the bed. "I just need time to think, I guess."

"I don't know if we should-" Yukio stopped himself, looking to Shiro for help.

"It's a lot to take in, Rin," Shiro tried. "Are you sure?"

Rin didn't look at either of them. "Yeah."

Yukio waited for him to elaborate, to throw out some sort of thread he could grab to pull them back together, but Rin said nothing else. There was a gap there, and Yukio didn't know how to cross it, didn't know how to reach him.

Shiro was the first to stand, pulling himself up off the bed with one last lingering glance thrown Rin's way. He crossed the room, laid a hand on Yukio's shoulder.

"We can talk later," Shiro offered, but Rin made no response.

Yukio's shoulders slumped, but Shiro squeezed it tight, before pulling his hand back and opening up the door to the room. He watched his father walk out, dumbfounded- were they really just supposed to leave him like this, when it was clear Rin needed help? He knew Shiro had a plan in most things, but he couldn't understand this. Rin had never pulled away from him before, not even when Yukio yelled at him, or ignored him, or slapped his hand away and shouted that he could protect himself. Rin had always been there with a smile, or a joke. This was the time where Yukio was supposed to pay that back.

But he couldn't say anything. He was useless. (weak, like always)

He couldn't stay behind, couldn't keep feeling this failure every time he looked at his twin. He stood, and reluctantly left Rin's side to follow Shiro, and Mephisto was close beside him. There was something contemplative, quiet beneath Mephisto's typical grin.

Yukio didn't have the energy to think about it, and brushed the thought aside, closing the door gently behind them.

* * *

Rin's chest ached as he stared down at the sheets of the bed, his knees tucked up close to his chin and his arms tight around them. The sheets weren't really all that interesting, just plain white, but now he could see the frayed edges, the threads pulled loose. His vision was sharper since that night, almost painfully so, all the black hairs and faded stains and tiny dust motes standing out in startling clarity. They were the same sheets he'd had his entire life, but now they looked different, foreign, now that he could see them better.

He felt like he didn't know them anymore.

' _Is it really any surprise they hid that from me for so long?'_ He wondered to himself, sharp nails digging into his arms. _'They hid it for years, by themselves. If they let me in, I would've found some way to mess things up. Just like I always do.'_

It hurt. It hurt to know that Yukio, Shiro, all the priests were part of some world that they never felt necessary to include him in. He knew he didn't deserve to feel hurt, or lied to, or deceived, but he did, and it sucked. He didn't know who they were anymore, not really. He didn't even know who he himself was. People had called him a demon for years, as long as he could remember, but he could always smile and brush it off because he knew in his heart that they were wrong. He could see now that he had been stupid. He was the one who was wrong. They were just humans, not even exorcists or able to see demons apparently, but they had known. They could sense that he wasn't right, not human, a demon.

Yukio and Shiro knew, too. So did Nagatomo, and Izumi, and Kyoda and Maruta.

It seemed like everyone knew, everyone except for him. They'd all lied to his face

And it hurt.

But he knew deep down that he wasn't any better.

* * *

It was only two days later that Rin was to start attending True Cross with Yukio, though to both himself and Shiro, it felt entirely too soon. They would have rather kept Rin at home, safe and protected until he was better, but Rin had insisted and ignored their warnings to wait. He told them that he was just wasting away at home, but Yukio got the feeling that was a lie, that there was some other motivation he wasn't telling them.

(Rin was probably just sick of being around them all day.)

So, the monday nearly a week after normal classes ad started, Yukio watched as Rin slung a backpack over his shoulder, decked out in True Cross' boys uniform behind him. The koma sword was hidden safely back in Shiro's office, but Rin had agreed to keep they key with himself, tied around a string under his uniform where it would be safe from prying eyes. He didn't look any better than when he had first woken up, not really, and looked as exhausted as he had two days ago. Yukio was tempted to force him to stay home, but talking to Rin had turned into climbing a wall that he just didn't know how to scale yet. It was a cowardly move to just keep his concerns to himself instead of standing up to Rin's need to deny anything was wrong, and he knew it.

Two weeks ago, Rin would have been absolutely dumbfounded but elated by the concept of a key that could open a door to wherever you wanted to go. But now, when Yukio used the key to open the monastery door to a secluded hallway in True Cross academy, Rin just gave it a look, and then stepped through the door. Yukio frowned to himself, but followed after Rin anyways, closing the door behind him. His twin was already there, at the end of the hallway where the walls opened up to a stream of students milling about to their classes. He looked back at Yukio, and waited for him.

His brother had different classes than him, but Yukio already knew the campus pretty well, and insisted on leading Rin to his first period even though he looked visibly reluctant. Rin had a schedule and a map to follow for his first few days, but Yukio still worried about him, worried about the other students' reactions like he did whenever Rin went to a new school. He bit down on his lip as they walked through the crowded hallways, dodging teachers and students alike on their walk to Rin's first period english. Yukio wished that Rin would say something, cross this wall first, but his twin was quiet, and din't say a word the entire walk.

All too soon, they reached his classroom, and with reluctance, Yukio stopped. He tried to force a smile, if not for Rin's sake then for that of his own classmates that passed by them. "Here's your first period, Rin."

Rather than acknowledge him verbally, Rin just nodded, stepping past Yukio and into the still rather empty classroom. Yukio moved to the side of the door so he wasn't in any of the other students' way, but watched his brother inconspicuously as Rin settled into one of the empty desks. He didn't talk to any of his classmates, and though they gave him questioning looks, nobody seemed intent on talking to him, which seemed both a good and disappointing thing. He stepped back, about to turn to walk the few doors down to his own classroom, but just as he looked away, he heard a soft call of "O-Okumura!" His eyes narrowed and he turned back to the classroom, ready to fend off any aggressive students. However, to his surprise, the person who approached Rin was a skittish but rather gentle looking boy who smiled hesitantly at Rin.

He felt relief creep in as the boy started talking to Rin, watching them carefully as the other student flush and scratch his head nervously. The boy took a seat next to Rin, carrying the conversation even with his brother's seemingly sparse replies. He didn't seem freaked out, not like some students did, and relaxed more as Rin pulled out a binder for them to look over.

"Man, leave it to that Okumura to make sure his brother's settled in!"

Yukio smiled and joined the passing group of students who shared first period with him, effortlessly melding into their group as they eagerly greeted him. "I just worry sometimes."

Though, if that interaction was anything to go by, maybe Rin would have at least one friend here.

* * *

' _You'll spot him quite easily!'_ Mr. Faust had told grin, grinning. _'I've heard it told he looks quite a bit like a thug!'_

God, hadn't that made Sei nervous. What was True Cross doing, accepting thugs into the academy? What if they brought drugs and gangs into the school? He couldn't handle that! The headmaster's words had him anxious and on edge the entire weekend, and it only grew more out of control as the clock crept towards monday morning. Maybe if he was nice to the kid, he wouldn't beat Sei up, or steal his homework, or shank him in a back alley? He didn't really want any trouble, he just wanted to get through his school courses and graduate form a respectable school, that was all!

Monday had come both too soon and too slowly, and he was damn near vibrating with energy when he got to his first period early in the morning. Honestly, he had debated showing up at all. He bet that if he showed up late enough, maybe he could get away with not having to talk to the new kid! He could fly under the radar, just tell the headmaster that he had missed the kid and maybe he should find another guide, since it would be too late to get to know him, right? But his academic honesty and guilt dashed those thoughts aside, and it was reluctantly that he sat at his desk, thirty minutes before class started. He watched the clock, biting at his lip as the minutes ticked by. There was fifteen minutes until class started now, and the guy still wasn't there. Maybe he was late? Maybe he wasn't going to show up at all?

Man, wouldn't that have been a relief!

Five minutes later, his eyes were drawn towards movement at the door. He saw two boys around his age standing there, one with brown hair, and the other with- blue? Was that natural? Was that even allowed with the dress code? He wasn't sure if that kid was supposed to be the one he was looking for, but he saw the brown haired boy (the freshman class representative! Wow!) point him in, and heard something like "Rin" form the last bit of their conversation. Rin, Rin Okumura? That was the guy he was supposed to lead around!

A sudden bolt of nervousness rocketed down his spine, and he wasn't even able to make himself move until after Okumura had already taken a seat. He should call out, get his attention, right? "O-Okumura!"

The guy looked at him, confused, and Sei forced himself to smile. Hands shaking, he reached down to his bag and stood up, feet heavy like cement blocks as he stood before the kid's desk.

"Oh, uh, hello, my name is Godain Sei!" He greeted as he sat down at the desk next to Okumura, trying not to sound as nervous as he looked.

"Okumura Rin," He said, and Sei startled as the guy squinted at him a bit. "Is someone making you come talk to me?"

Crap, he was so obvious! "No, I'm here by myself! I just get really nervous talking to new people, I'm sorry.

Okumura blinked, then looked down at his bookbag. "Alrighty then."

Sei grimaced to himself. This really wasn't off to the greatest start, but he was so awkward! How was he supposed to start conversation? Ugh! He sighed to himself, then looked over at Okumura as his classmate pulled his binder out. Oh! That! Didn't Mr. Faust say something like he was out on medical leave?

"Hey, did you manage to catch up on the homework okay?" He asked, inwardly cheering himself on for finding a topic to talk about.

"Yeah, I guess?" Okumura frowned at his binder, which was a welcome change from the blank expression he'd had on so far. "I still don't really get the verb tenses, though, there's so many of them."

"Oh!" Sei smiled, and opened up his own folder to grab the assignment. "I do, I can help you out! We still have some time before class starts, and I don't think she's grading for accuracy anyways."

Okumura looked up at him, and seemed almost surprised. "Really?"

"Sure!"

Sei spent the last few minutes of class explaining the material as best he could, and fixed some of Okumura's spelling errors along the way. His classmate was struggling to understand quite a few of the concepts they'd gone over so far, but Sei tried his best to reframe them in ways he could understand, and they finally managed to work out a quick system that Okumura understood on his own. He was able to understand most of it after that, and continued to erase and rewrite his answers even as the bell rang and the teacher stepped into the classroom.

"Doing our homework at the last minute already, Mr. Okumura?" The teacher called aloud, and something in Godain's chest didn't feel right as he watched her look down her nose at Okumura.

He looked over at his classmate, who hadn't looked up from where he was still writing even as the attention of the classroom started to phase over to him. For a minute, Sei wasn't even sure that Okumura had heard the teacher, but then he could see the tightening of Okumura's jaw as he harshly scribbled out a line of text. He didn't say anything, just steadfastly ignoring their gazes.

Almost as if he was used to it.

"Ah, it's not his fault!" He found himself saying, "We were going over it earlier and I noticed a few spelling errors. It's not his fault, sensei, he had it done."

Their teacher looked back at Sei, an eyebrow raised curiously, and for a second Sei almost faltered as more eyes zeroed in on his back. After a second, though, she nodded and took her place at the front of the classroom as she began taking roll call. Sei sucked in a quick breath and sighed it out as the classroom's attention was suddenly diverted away from him, relaxing. He saw something shift next to him, and looked up to see Okumura smiling at him, mouthing a silent 'thanks'. It was small, but it seemed to light up his entire face, and Sei was thrown back by the vivid blues of Okumura's eyes that he could see now. He'd never really seen blue eyes before in Japan, but he was sure that Okumura had to have some of the most stunning in the world.

As... weird as that sounded.

Sei flashed a quick smile back at him and then looked back down to stare at his paper, ignoring the heat in his cheeks. He picked idly at his paper, missing the first part of the lesson to his thoughts. His attention continued to waver until their teacher called on him to read aloud his answer to one of the questions on the homework, but even when he tuned back into the class, he couldn't quite get the image of Okumura's smile out of his head. Who would've expected something like that out of a guy so moody looking?

As the bell dismissed their class some half hour later, Sei started packing out his stuff, and instinctively called for Okumura to wait up for him. To his surprise, the blue haired boy actually paused by the door, looking back towards him and waiting patiently. Once he caught up, the two set off into the hallway, sliding through other students.

"Don't you have a class to go to?"

Sei almost didn't hear Okumura over the shouting and chattering of the students, and even then, it took him a second to process what he'd actually said. "Oh! We have the same schedule. Mr. Faust asked me to be your guide, is that okay?"

"Uh, yeah, sure," Okumura said hesitantly, hands reaching up to grip the straps of his bag. Sei frowned a bit, and was about to ask what was wrong when Okumura kept talking. "You know where we're off to next?"

"Yeah! We have algebra next, and we've only been with him for a week, but I hear he yells at students who talk in the class," Sei chuckled nervously. "So sorry in advance if I ignore you, okay?"

"No problem."

The rest of the day passed by pretty uneventfully, and honestly, Sei didn't see why everyone avoided Okumura so much. The teachers either harassed or blatantly ignored him, and the students whispered behind his back when they thought he couldn't hear. Sei didn't really understand- Okumura had been nothing but nice, if not a little distant, the whole day, what could've warranted that treatment and Mr. Faust's warning? He was actually pretty surprised to find that he preferred Okumura's company over the boredom during the previous week. He wasn't too much for conversation, but he was attentive, and opened up little by little as the day passed.

All too soon, the last bell rang, and students were dismissed from their final classes of the day. Sei tagged along with Okumura on the way out of the school, chatting idly about the homework they'd been assigned for the night. He gave Okumura his number, just in case he needed Sei's help again, and was about to ask him if they could go back to the dorms together when he saw another boy come down the other end of the hallway. Ah, the brown haired boy from earlier- Yukio Okumura! He couldn't believe the two were really twins.

"Good afternoon, Godain," Yukio greeted politely, a kind smile on his face.

He flushed, eyes widening. "Y-You know my name?" What had he done to get that kind of attention?

"Of course, Mr. Faust informed me that you would be helping my brother. Thank you for that."

Sei blushed a darker red as the younger Okumura gave a short bow, completely unsure of what to do with such attention.

"I-It was no problem! It was kind of fun, actually," He laughed nervously as the older Okumura looked at him, surprised. "I'm guessing you guys are walking back to the dorms together. I'll see you tomorrow, Okumura?"

His classmate nodded, giving him a short wave before joining the other Okumura. Sei watched them for just a minute, waiting until they turned a corner before he breathed out a sigh.

That had been nerve wracking. Two new people, in one day? Okumura seemed a little closed off, but he really hoped that Sei could call him a friend some day.

* * *

"The cram school has been in session for almost a week and a half now, but to be honest, we've really only covered the basics..."

Yukio had never been a chatter box. Hell, he tended to pride himself on his ability to stay quiet and attentive, but with how silent Rin was, he was desperate for just about anything to fill that silence. They had to take a detour back through the school after leaving Godain, and though the walk was barely more than three minutes, the tense silence was near unbearable for Yukio. He’d latched onto anything he could to talk about, and inwardly mourned to himself the days where conversation flowed easy between them. If not that, then a comfortable quiet, but neither of those were present. Instead, Yukio was left to fill the silence with rather inane topics, at times even going over information that he'd already told Rin before.

The sight of an abandoned hallway brought both a sense of relief and disappointing defeat to Yukio. His attempts at conversation hadn't done much of anything to bridge the gap between himself and his twin, but at least with the start of cram classes, he would have an excuse to step back and regroup before trying at it again.

As Yukio inserted the key into one of the doorways, he came face to face with wide, worried green eyes.

"Yuki!"

"Ah, Shiemi," He greeted, smiling at the girl who definitely didn't look too pleased with him.

"Where were you?" She asked, grabbing his hand and squeezing it tightly. "You rushed out so fast, and then you were gone for days! We were so worried!"

His smile turned a little more strained, and he motioned to Rin. "We had a medical emergency that needed to be handled, but everything is better now. Shiemi, I'd like to introduce you to my twin brother, Rin. Rin, this is Shiemi Moriyama."

She flushed when she noticed him, immediately dropping Yukio's hand. "O-Oh, um, hello."

"Hey," Rin gave a little wave, and that was that.

Yukio continued his conversation with a much more subdued Shiemi as they made their way to the cram classes. After they made it to the teacher’s lounge, he waved them on to go ahead, stepping into the lounge and sighing as he closed the door behind him. 

God, when had just _talking_ to Rin turn into such an emotionally exhausting battle?

Not for the first time, and probably not the last, he wondered if becoming an exorcist was worth this. 

No, he told himself. Becoming an exorcist _had_ to be worth it. He had to make it worth it. Yukio had to be strong enough to protect his brother. Now that Satan knew Rin, knew what he was and that he had the flames, his twin would never be safe- from Satan, or from the exorcists. So, he had to protect Rin, he had to keep getting stronger, and if that destroyed his easy relationship with his twin, then that would have to be worth it. 

In some part, it helped knowing that Shiro would stand by his side in all of this. 

So, he patted his face a bit, set aside his bookbag, and stripped off his school jacket, grabbing his exorcist coat off of one of the coat racks. He shrugged it on as he stepped over to the briefcase he had put away in one of the employee lockers, grabbing it and setting out to return to his class in the last few minutes before it started. Hopefully, Shiemi had led Rin to the right room, but as Yukio walked towards his class, he suddenly worried that setting Rin loose to meet the other students on his own wasn't such a good idea in hindsight. Rin tended to make bad first impressions, not by any fault of his own, but because he was feared by the socially upstanding and hated by the very gangsters that most people perceived him as. 

Rin had been doing fine in his normal classes, but as Yukio got closer, he got the distinct feeling that the same couldn’t be said for the cram classes. 

“What’s with that hideous look on your face, huh? If you got something to say, then say it, gorilla.”

Shit. That was Kamiki’s voice, no doubt about it, and the ‘gorilla’ she was referring to must have been Suguro. Dammit, the two most argumentative kids in his class were already going at it. This week was not going off to a good start. 

“Oh, piss off, Kamiki,” Yukio quickened his pace as he heard Suguro start to get riled up as well. “You can’t tell me you aren’t wonderin’ how this kid gets in on ‘special recommendation’ and then comes in a week and a half late!”

“Maybe I just don’t feel like sticking my ugly mug in everyone’s business!”

“Bon, maybe we should leave the guy alone...”

He couldn’t have gotten to the door soon enough, because the second he opened it, he was greeted with the sight of his students huddled in the middle of the room. Kamiki and Suguro were both in each other’s faces, anger written all over their expressions. Shima and Miwa were trying valiantly, but ultimately futilely, to drag Bon back, while Paku stood nervously off to Kamiki’s side. It looked like Rin had taken his seat up at the front next to Shiemi, but he was focused almost entirely on a sheet of paper before him. Shiemi herself stood to his left, a worried expression on her face. Suguro had probably tried to get up in Rin’s face like he had with Kamiki the first day they met, but it looked like Shiemi had risen to defend him, and Kamiki had probably intercepted before he got there.

“That’s enough!” Yukio called sharply, eyebrows furrowed and eyes narrowed at the group of students. They all looked at him with wide, guilty eyes, with the exception of Rin. “Suguro, Kamiki is right, you shouldn’t prod in other people’s personal business. But!” He turned his glare to Kamiki as the girl smirked haughtily at Suguro. “That doesn’t mean we should resort to insults and violence. All of you, go sit down, and I don’t want to hear another word out of any of you unless I tell you otherwise. Understood?”

There were a few moody ‘understood’s, some more enthusiastic than others as the pages returned to their seats. Yukio watched them carefully as they did, making sure that no other arguments or scuffles broke out. Rin put his paper away then, probably some form of homework, and looked up to Yukio, who grimaced slightly to himself. To anyone else, Rin looked as normal as he always did, but to Yukio, who had known him for his whole life, he could see the little telltale signs that something was wrong. The tightness in his jaw, the slightly narrowed eyes, and even the downward tilt of his sharper ears. Yukio gritted his teeth, turning back to the class. 

“Suguro,” He didn’t have to raise his voice much over the near dead silence of the classroom. “Come see me after class, if you would.”

Suguro frowned, but nodded anyways, pulling out his own notebooks for the class. Suguro wasn’t a bad kid; on the contrary, he was one of Yukio’s best students. His studying habits were impeccable, and his grades were always high in all of his classes, including the ones at the cram school. Yukio knew of Suguro’s work outs and fitness training, and admired the initiative and dedication he had. Suguro pushed himself, in his school life, and personal life, and Yukio could appreciate that. He did, however, tend to become rather blind and immature when he felt something insulted his dedication or hard work. It wasn’t a major problem, really, he’d grow out of it eventually, but this particular problem needed to be nipped in the bud. 

“Ah, good work, Yukio! Excellently handled.”

He startled at the voice that suddenly spoke from next to him, looking to his side to see- Shiro! Yukio found himself smiling as his father stepped forward to stand by his side, mouth curled in a lazy smile as his hands tucked themselves into the pockets of his coat. Shiro was more than a familiar sight to himself and Rin, of course, but as Yukio looked back at the pages, he suddenly remembered that they had never seen the paladin before. He almost laughed at the looks of awe on their faces.

“I apologize for my absence the last week or so, but as you all know, there was a situation that needed my attention,” Shiro continued, glancing over to Yukio and grinning. “Originally, the plan was for myself to be your teacher, and Yukio here, your TA, but I don’t see any reason why Yukio can’t continue to be your primary teacher. I’ll function as your impromptu TA for now, unless I see something that indicates I should act otherwise.”

Yukio damn near jerked his head around to stare at his father, and even as it was he only barely managed to stop himself from breaking out in an excited smile. Truth be told, he’d absolutely loved acting as the class’s stand in teacher, and Shiro definitely hadn’t forgotten. It was almost like a dream come true. He practically had his own class, his first teaching job! It would be tough, he knew, but God if he wasn’t excited. 

“Now, your phys ed teacher and I have been talking the past few days and have decided that due to your impressive progress in your opening unit, today will be dedicated to familiarizing yourself with different types of demons. Aka,” At this, Shiro’s expression turned sadistic. “You’re runnin’ laps! Leave your stuff in here and go get changed, I’ll be expecting you in the gym in fifteen minutes. You’ll be there the rest of the day, so just go back to the dorms when we dismiss you. Got it?”

“Yes, sir!”

The talk with Suguro would have to wait.

* * *

Surprisingly enough, the next argument that happened wasn’t between Suguro and Kamiki, but between Suguro and Rin himself, a few days after Rin's first day in cram classes. Well, that wasn’t completely true. The argument had _started_ with Suguro and Kamiki, with the red eyed girl poking fun at Suguro’s running pace. He was actually pretty quick in comparison to most of the class, but Kamiki always seemed to be just out of his reach, just a little faster than he was. Yukio was originally content to let them work out their dispute- they were both panting and tired, how much longer could they truly go at it? -but the spat quickly took a turn for the worse. 

“You can barely outrun that Leaper!” Kamiki had laughed while the students were on break. Suguro was kneeling down on the ground, panting for breath, and though Kamiki stood, she was barely better than he was. “How can you expect to accomplish such a ridiculous goal like defeating Satan with stamina like that?”

“Huh? What did you say, asshole?” Suguro turned a tired, irritated glare up to Kamiki. “I’m not gonna defeat him, I’m gonna kill him! I swear on my life!”

“It’s a good thing young Suguro isn’t a demon, you know,” Yukio heard a voice say somewhere below him. “He wouldn’t last long making ambitious promises like those.”

Yukio looked down to see a high-browed white dog standing by his feet, looking over the pages passively. 

“Mephisto,” Yukio greeted.

“Guten Nachmittag, Mr. Okumura,” The dog replied, glancing up at him before looking back at the pages. “It looks as if your brother has something to say.”

“You’ll lose.”

Yukio turned his attention back to the pages as he heard Rin speak, Shiro doing the same next to him. Kamiki and Suguro were in each other’s faces again, the pages gathered around them once more. Rin stood off to the side, Shiemi next to him, who looked at him with concern and near surprise- probably that he had spoken at all. Rin was looking at Suguro calmly, who turned to face him, eyes ablaze

“Oh, so he finally decides to grace us with his presence,” Suguro sneered. “The hell did you say? Speak up.”

“I said, you’ll lose,” Rin repeated, and Yukio was surprised to see his eyebrows furrow in the closest thing to irritation he'd seen since the incident. “You wouldn’t even make it past Astaroth. Don’t be stupid, you’ll get yourself killed for nothing.”

Yukio frowned. “I’m stopping them. This has gone far enough.”

He stepped forward, only to feel a hand suddenly grab him around the arm. He looked back to see Shiro looking at him, holding a finger to his lips. 

“Leave them,” Shiro said quietly, looking back at the pages. “It’s good for him.”

“How-!”

“Shh.”

“So what?!” Suguro demanded, tan face flushing. “Ya act like you’ve seen them before or somethin’!”

“I did,” Rin retorted. His eyes were narrowed. “Astaroth nearly scalped me.”

Miwa fretted anxiously at Suguro’s side, one hand pulling at the taller boy’s shirt as he looked up at the teachers. Shiro made an unnecessarily dramatic show of acting like he and Yukio were chatting, while Mephisto turned away. “B-Bon, maybe we shouldn’t talk about this. You know Mr. Fujimoto was possessed by Satan-“

“Then you should be in my place!” Suguro fired back, fueled by his embarrassment and need to prove himself. “Your dad nearly died, don’t you care at all?!”

“Ohhhh, you’ve really done it now, Bon,” Shima laughed nervously, backing away from him as Rin’s expression darkened. 

Yukio felt cold anger prickling at his stomach, and for the second time that class period, he moved to intervene. This had gone on long enough. He didn’t know what Shiro was expecting out of this, but there was no point in letting the boys take personal jabs at each other. This wouldn’t end in anything but a fight, and Yukio wouldn’t let it get that far. 

Despite his determination, he once again felt himself being dragged back by Shiro. This time, Shiro held a hand over his mouth and gave him a pointed look. No matter how strong Yukio had gotten, Shiro was still stronger, and his grip held fast. Mephisto’s ear flicked their way as he glanced at them, but ultimately went back to watching the pages as Shiro leaned down. 

“He’s been holding this in for too long, Yukio,” He murmured. “Let him work some of his emotions out.”

Yukio scowled sharply, but stayed where he was when Shiro released him. 

“Of course I care!” Rin snapped. 

“Don’t seem like it! What, you get knocked around a lil bit and then you give up?” Suguro’s grin was sharp, jeering. 

Rin unzipped and threw his jacket off, eyes blazing as he stomped forward. “I’ll show you ‘knocked around’, you ugly, rooster-looking asshat!”

“Bring it on, blue haired freak!”

Shouting broke out among the pages as they rushed to separate the two, Miwa looking more than panicked as he struggled to pull Suguro back with Shima’s help. Shiemi had grabbed Rin’s arm, and surprisingly, Kamiki stood in front of Rin, pushing him back. She looked reluctant though, and Yukio thought dryly to himself that she had probably been looking forward to the fight. Paku looked nervously between the groups, discomfort written all in her body language. 

“Ha! Look at you and your little posse!” Rin fired off, emotionless expression completely abandoned in his anger. “You’re really just a middle school bully, aren’t you!”

“Better ‘n some stuck up, rich kid emo twat!” Suguro shouted, straining against Shima’s surprisingly strong hold. 

“Rich kid?! Emo twat?!” Rin screeched. “What the fuck do you know?!”

“I know that ya skipped school for whole week ‘n a half! Yer really not takin’ any of this seriously, are ya?!”

“ _I was in a coma!!”_

“B-Bon, just drop it, okay?” Miwa cried, pulling at his shirt desperately. “Y-You don’t wanna get in trouble, right?”

“So ya think that’s an excuse to half ass this shit?!” Suguro seethed. “Ya really don’t give a damn, do ya!”

“Says the dumbass who’s life goal is _suicide!”_

“Least I have a goal! The hell’re you here for?!”

“Definitely not to get myself killed!”

“That’s _enough!!”_

To Yukio’s surprise, the shout hadn’t had come from either himself or Shiro. He followed the pages’ looks of shock back to- Shiemi? The blonde girl was standing with her fists clenched tight by her side, expression twisted in a frown as she fixed both Rin and Suguro with a harsh glare. 

“Whether you two like it or not, we’re classmates!” Shiemi near shouted, normally soft voice much louder than Yukio had ever heard before. “And classmates shouldn’t argue!”

“She’s right,” Shiro called, leaning against the railing that separated them from the pit. “You kids gonna argue like that on the field?”

Rin and Suguro looked at each other, then away again, and though they glared at the ground, Yukio could see the guilt. The other pages sighed near collectively in relief, stepping away from the two. 

“Says the guy who sat by and let it happen...” Shima complained under his breath, but Shiro’s ears, sharp as ever, caught it anyways. 

Shiro’s expression turned a little more serious, his smile dropping. “You think this program is a joke? You’re training to be exorcists. Nobody’s going to hold your hand or coddle you. The only people you can rely on is your own team, and if you can’t do that, then you have no place in True Cross. This isn’t some simulator. This is real life. If you got a problem, take it up with yourselves.”

The pages shifted uncomfortably, glancing around at each other. If there was one thing Yukio could appreciate about his father’s teaching, it was Shiro’s ability to be brutally honest and to the point. Being nice to pages just ended up with underprepared exwires and dead exorcists. Shiro was much more blunt than Yukio thought he could ever be, so maybe it was a good thing that Shiro had chosen to be the TA instead of just giving Yukio free reign. There was still a lot he had to learn. Mephisto, who at some point had apparently switched to human form, shared his sentiment, evident in the appraising look he gave Shiro. 

“Now, go back to the lockers and get changed. Bye,” Shiro waved, dismissing them. 

Yukio sighed as he turned away from the pages, turning a muted glare up to Shiro. “Was that really necessary?”

Shiro merely grinned at him. “Rin was able to work out some pent up aggression, and Suguro was able to voice his thoughts. I’d call that necessary.”

“They were practically at each other’s throats!” Yukio protested. 

“And they’ll keep on arguing for the next two days until they work it out,” His father explained, watching as Rin and Suguro pointedly avoided going anywhere near each other. “That’s the thing with boys, Yukio. You gotta let them fight some stuff out.”

“And I suppose Rin’s track record was just him ‘fighting it out’,” Yukio muttered, frowning. 

“Ah, now that’s different! _That_ was bullying, not working it out.”

Yukio sighed again, still not reassured that his two students’ fighting was going to lead to anything but more violence. Shiro glanced over at him and smiled fondly, reaching forward to squeeze Yukio’s shoulder. 

“You’re still young, Yukio, and you’ve got a lot to learn. Just trust me on this one, alright?” 

“...alright,” Yukio said reluctantly. “But if they start causing property damage, I’m putting them through Baryon therapy.”

“That’s my boy!” Shiro laughed, pulling him in for a side hug. “See? You’ll get the hang of this!”

Against his will, Yukio felt a smile pulling at his lips. He breathed out a laugh, feeling a bit lighter as he watched the pages leave. Though Rin and Suguro avoided each other at all costs, he could see Shiemi standing by Rin’s side, and, surprisingly, both Kamiki and Paku as well. The former was probably insulting Suguro to Rin, rather loudly, if Suguro’s backwards glares were anything to go by. The students were too tired to try anything, though, and the worst Yukio saw was some snippy remarks and maybe a middle finger or two. No fights broke out, or arguments, though Yukio wasn’t sure if he should be relieved or concerned about that. He hadn’t seen a page class that was divided so severely, but maybe Shiro had a plan. Maybe his father saw something that he didn’t. 

At any rate, it was nice seeing Rin finally talking to other people again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and criticisms are very much appreciated! I would love to hear your thoughts and theories! owo


	3. a window, a hand print, and a towel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again guys! Here with chapter three, I hope this finds you all well.
> 
> I want to take a quick second to talk about something that's affecting our society right now, and that is the protests and George Floyd's murder. I want you all to know that I am emphatically pro-BLM, and I have been working non-stop to aid the protests and the movement in any way I can. I strongly suggest that you all do the same if you can. It's time to take a stand for our black brothers and sisters, and realize now that being apolitical, or choosing not to take a side, is helping the oppressors. Silence is violence. At the end of this chapter, I will include some links for education, and how to help the movement and the protests.
> 
> If you do not support BLM, or decide to stop reading or supporting me because of this, then good. Please leave. If you are white and this talk makes you uncomfortable, then please understand that this is what black people and POC have to endure every day of their lives.
> 
> Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy, and that you take the time to support the movement in what way you can.
> 
> chapter tw: violence, injury, character experiences a brief bout of self-hatred

Much to Yukio’s chagrin, Suguro and Rin’s arguing did not, in fact, stop after the first day. It continued on into the next day. And the next. And over into the weekend. And even through the next week. Yukio was over it. It was counterproductive, disruptive, and more annoying than he thought he could put into words. He was happy to see Rin returning to some semblance of normalcy, even if he was a little stiffer around Yukio and Shiro, but the arguing was grating on his last nerve. Shiro could act like he didn’t care, but Yukio knew that his father was growing just as annoyed. So, despite Shiro’s protest, and probably Yukio’s better judgement, he grabbed both boys by the collar at the end of classes and dragged them down the hallway.

Both boys sputtered in confusion as they were hauled off, simultaneously trying not to touch each other as Yukio dragged them down the hall. He stopped by an empty classroom, kicked the door open, and shoved both boys in. Rin and Suguro turned on their heels to stare wide eyed at him, but he merely glared in response, hands on his hips.

“You have a training camp next week,” He started, voice low and irritated. “I’ve put up with your arguing long enough. The both of you are being incredibly disruptive to the class, and disrespectful not only to your classmates but your teachers as well. You two have until the training camp to figure something out, or else you will be forbidden from participating and will remain as pages until next season when testing starts over!”

Suguro visibly tensed. 

Yukio sucked in a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. “Listen. You’re both remarkable students. Suguro, your grades and studying habits are phenomenal, and your scripture memorizing far exceeds your peers. Rin, you’re incredibly athletically gifted, and your ability to think on your feet and react to situations will be an incredible help in your career. But,” He said this pointedly, eyes narrowing. “All of that is meaningless if you’re not able to work on a team and cooperate with your peers. Your arguing is childish, and immature, and will scare off any possible teams who might want you.”

The two looked properly chastised, though while Suguro seemed guilty, Rin was glaring at the ground, frustration written all over his expression. Yukio sighed, rubbing at his nose. He knew how his twin felt, even if Rin hadn’t told him. Rin had always tried his hardest to get along with his classmates, but his fuse was short, and his temper terrifying. Fights were inevitable, especially when some of his classmates would actively seek him out. True Cross was a fresh start for Rin, and this set back was probably why he was so frustrated.

Yukio turned towards the door, a frown on his face. “I’ll leave you two be, at least try to talk this out, please?”

He shut the door behind him, and suddenly both Rin and Suguro were alone.

Rin breathed out an angry huff and turned on his heel, not even looking at Suguro as he strode towards the window and popped it open. He got one leg out before Suguro finally realized what he was doing, and with an enraged scowl, he grabbed Rin's wrist in a bruising grip.

"Where the hell are you going?" He demanded.

"What does it look like?" Rin retorted, glaring at Suguro with just as much intensity. "I'm leaving."

"Okumura-sensei said-"

"Yeah, well I don't really give a _shit_ what Yukio said," Rin snapped, and the utter vehemency behind it surprised Suguro. "Just stop startin' shit with me and he won't know the difference."

He yanked his arm out from Suguro's grip and leaned back out of the window, but then Suguro was yanking him back in once more, wrinkling Rin's shirt in his fingers.

"Hold on a damn minute, I'm not done with you yet!"

Rin's glare turned to a snarl as he grabbed Suguro's hand and tried to pull it off, but Suguro grabbed him by the collar and yanked him back in the room. He grunted in surprise, not expecting the strength and force that slammed him up against the wall and pinned him there. Suguro's scowl was even more heated than before, and now Rin could clearly see the anger that drew fine lines into Suguro's face and set his brown eyes alight. His own rage rose up to meet the other boy's.

"What the hell is your problem? Let me go!"

"Stop tryna run away then! Jesus, could ya sit still for two damn seconds?!" Suguro's scowl deepened. "I'm not about to risk my whole career for your edgy emo tough guy bullshit!"

"You're not risking jack shit!" Rin bared his teeth angrily, narrowly restraining himself from throwing Suguro off. "Just play along and it'll be fine!"

Suguro sucked in an angry breath, and on his exhale was a simple word. "No."

"What?"

"I said, no!" Suguro repeated.

"No? _No?_ What the hell do you mean, _no?"_ Rin demanded, voice pitched with his rising frustration.

"Okumura-sensei said to work it out, so guess what, dumbass? We're gonna work it out!"

Rin blinked in surprise, but the anger and rage came back just as quickly, and he shoved Suguro back harshly. "I don't _want_ to work it out! Just- just leave me the hell _alone!"_

He took a running leap out of the window before Suguro could stop him, jumping down two stories to the courtyard and leaving the other boy in the abandoned classroom, alone. Suguro stared at the window in shock for a long minute, before letting out a frustrated groan. He leaned his back against the wall and slid down to sit on the floor, rubbing at his face in annoyance. This Okumura kid was giving him the worst migraine. He leaned his head into his hands and rubbed at his temples, closing his eyes as he tried to relieve some of the pressure. As if the migraine wasn't bad enough on its own, his thoughts were up in a whirlwind all over again.

The way Okumura had reacted that whole time was more reminiscent of a cornered animal, rather than a thug being confronted, and it made him feel, well, gross for some reason. He never intended to be rude to the guy, but just... Okumura came into the school on special accomodations, then couldn't be bothered to show up for the first week. To Suguro, it just looked like the rich kid son of the Paladin had bought his way into the school, then didn't even care to attend the classes that everyone else had worked their asses off trying to get into.

Except, well, Okumura _had_ apparently been in a coma during that time, following his dad getting possessed and almost dying apparently. Honestly, he didn’t really know how he’d take it if his own mother or father were to be possessed by Satan himself. Konekomaru and Shima were probably the closest people to him that could, and weren’t they telling him to back off Okumura?

Well, shit, he'd really made an ass out of himself, hadn't he?

Suguro groaned and leaned his head back against the wall, opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling for a long minute.

Something else was bothering him, too. Okumura had avoided most of them like the plague, excepting Shiemi, who had taken it upon herself to attach to him like glue. He'd thought it was just Okumura being edgy and thinking he was too good to hang out with the likes of them, but now that he thought back on it, and over the confrontation that had just gone down, Okumura was purposely avoiding them, pushing them away.

Why, though? Why push them away?

He narrowed his eyes at the ceiling, determination taking the place of anger.

He would just have to find out for himself.

* * *

It was nearly half way through the day, and Rin still could not shake the feeling that he was being watched.

Godaiin had asked him a few times over the course of the day if something was wrong, and though Rin had no definite answer for him, he couldn't stop glancing around himself in the hallways, trying to see _who_ exactly was watching him. He was sure Godaiin probably thought he was insane at this point.

"Okumura, are you sure you're okay?" Godaiin asked him for what must have been the sixth time that day as they followed the crowd towards the cafeteria.

Rin sighed and scratched at his head. "I... I don't know, I just feel like someone's- watching me, y'know? That probably sounds crazy-"

"Ah, Okumura?" Godaiin tugged gently at his jacket sleeve, but his eyes were glued on the other side of the cafeteria. "C-Could it be that guy? Over there?"

"Where?" Rin followed Godaiin's finger as his classmate pointed towards somewhere by the windows, and Rin's mouth snapped shut as he recognized who exactly had been watching him all day. He scowled- of course it was Suguro, who else would be bullheaded and assholish enough to antagonize him even outside of cram classes? The guy was leaned against one of the tables with Shima and Konekomaru sitting at the chairs, chatting to each other as Suguro pinned him with a thoughtful stare. As they made eye contact, Suguro's expression morphed into a smirk as he pushed off from the table, making his way towards the two of them.

A sudden bolt of nervousness twisted his stomach, though for what, he wasn't sure. He quickly grabbed Godaiin by the wrist and dragged him deeper into the cafeteria, pointedly the opposite direction of Suguro and his posse.

"O-Okumura?" Godaiin sounded incredibly confused, but followed him anyways. "Where are we-"

"Hey, Okumura!"

Rin had sudden and very vivid flashbacks to Astaroth as an arm was suddenly slung around his shoulders, and he found himself suddenly dragged into step alongside Suguro. How the hell had Suguro caught up to them so quickly?!

"I was just looking for you," Suguro grinned. "Sit down together for lunch? Oh, great idea, Okumura, you don't even have to ask."

"Should I get a teacher...?" Godaiin asked weakly, still following along beside them even though Rin had let him go.

"Bon's on another one of those tirades of his," Shima sighed, both he and Konekomaru walking alongside Godaiin.

"I wouldn't worry too much, they'll work it out soon enough," Konekomaru said, smiling gently. "I'm Konekomaru Miwa, by the way. That's Suguro Ryuji up there, and this is Shima Renzou."

"Yo," The pink haired boy gave Godaiin a two finger salute.

"We already have everything worked out, right, Okumura?" Suguro needled, grinning widely.

"Sure," Rin grumbled.

"See, Koneko? Best friends already," Suguro called over his shoulder. He dragged Rin over to an empty table and sat them both down in the booth section, leaving a few seats open for the rest of their unwilling party. Godaiin hesitated, then sat down next to Rin, while Konekomaru and Shima sat across the table, pulling out their lunches. Rin snorted at Suguro, Shima and Konekomaru's matching bento boxes, instead pulling out his homework and deciding to ignore everyone at the table excepting Godaiin. He leaned his head on his hand, pointedly blocking out Suguro as he set himself to his work.

"Yo, Okumura, you got a lunch?" Shima asked, mouth full of rice as he hummed at Konekomaru's chiding 'don't talk with food in your mouth, Shima'.

Rin rolled his eyes, gritting his teeth as he stared down at the equations scrawled across the paper. In all honesty, he had taken to rushing out of the house as early as he could in the morning, and went without a lunch most days. Being hungry was worth not having to be in the kitchen alongside Yukio and Shiro, who tried time and time again to talk to him, to get him to open up. He'd just... skip lunch and grab a snack at the drug store, it was fine.

He couldn't tell them that, of course, so all he said was a simple and short, “No."

"Sure you do," Suguro said, and against his better judgement, Rin looked up to see that Suguro had slid his own bento closer to Rin.

Rin blinked, then gave Suguro a flat stare. "I'm not eating your food."

"Of course you are," Suguro held the chopsticks out for him, then raised an eyebrow. "Need me to feed ya? 'S that it?"

Rin scowled and snatched the chopsticks out of his hand. "Asshole."

Suguro merely grinned and leaned back in his chair, watching as Rin snatched up a piece of chicken and popped it in his mouth, then set the chopsticks down and went back to his homework. Suguro snickered and leaned closer to Rin, poking his shoulder. 'What are you, five? Eat."

"Piss off." Was his irritated reply.

"If you eat, I'll leave you alone," Suguro prodded.

Rin was quiet for a long moment, before he turned to look at Suguro, a dark scowl on his face. "Promise?"

"Swear on my life."

Rin glared him down for a long minute, tempted to just say no and go back to his homework, but... his stomach ached, and it had been nearly two days since he'd eaten a real meal.

"...just this once," He muttered under his breath, then picked the chopsticks back up and ate another piece of chicken. Suguro nodded smugly and pulled out his own work, some sort of English assignment judging by the accompanying textbook. Godaiin chatted with Shima and Konekomaru while they worked, both Suguro and Rin staying quiet for the most part. Every few pages or so, Suguro would look up to make sure he was eating, before going back to his work. 

The whole situation was throwing him for a loop. First Suguro couldn't stop starting shit with him, and now the guy was looking after him like some sort of- mom? Friend? He didn't know, but it was unsettling

The end of the lunch period left Rin feeling no less confused as he and Godaiin made their way to the next class, and through the rest of the day. Even after school ended, he was still trying to figure out Suguro's game, what his angle was. The walk to the cram class with Yukio was spent in pensive quiet, like it always was, but this time, Rin spent the walk thinking instead of just avoiding conversation with his brother. 

His thoughts were interrupted when they reached the classroom itself. He sat himself down at the front of the room, next to Shiemi as usual, a few minutes before class was set to start, as usual. Class went by quietly, as usual- nothing was really out of the ordinary. Yukio seemed pleasantly surprised that RIn and Suguro's arguing had stopped, but beyond that, everything was normal.

What wasn't exactly normal, however, was dinner. He should have expected it, honestly, but his normal routine of sitting alone to work on homework by the fountain was interrupted by, who else but, Suguro Ryuji. 

The guy sat himself down right next to Rin, making himself comfortable as Shima and Konekomaru sat themselves just across from him as well. Suguro leaned over to look at him, an eyebrow raised. "You got dinner?"

Rin sighed and rolled his eyes, setting his book down with a huff. "What's it to you?"

Suguro merely held his own food out, something he must’ve picked up at the cafeteria. 

Rin looked him in the eyes, scowling. “You’re not gonna give up until I do, are you?”

“Nope.” Suguro looked unbothered. 

Rin huffed and looked over at Konekomaru. “How much longer is he going to keep at this?”

“Sucks for you dude, Bon’s stubborn as a mule!” Shima laughed. 

Konekomaru smiles sheepishly. “He won’t stop until he gets what he wants.”

“Uh-huh,” Rin scowled, and looked back at Suguro. “And what exactly does he want?”

Suguro grinned, and it might’ve looked friendly to anyone else, but to him? It just looked goddamn frightening. “You’re gonna be my new best friend.”

Rin blinked in surprise, then blanched. "What?!"

"You might as well give in now," Shima said, sighing as he stretched. "He's our temple's kaname, after all."

Rin was quiet for a long moment, utterly stunned. He... nobody had ever wanted to be his friend before, nobody ever even wanted to be around him, excepting those at the monastery. Nobody had pursued him before, and especially not this aggressively. It made his chest feel a little warm, but a second passed and it was replaced by ice. Sure, they wanted to be his friends now, but that would only last for so long. They'd find out, one day, and then they would hate him just like everybody else seemed to. 

Suguro might want to be his friend, now, but it was only a matter of time until he gave up on that.

"Fine," He found himself saying. His mouth twisted in a wry grin. "You can try, if you wanna."

"Are you doubting me?" Suguro asked, eyebrow raised.

"Of course. You won't last long."

"Oh? Bet."

* * *

Rin had to admit, Suguro was... more determined than he had expected. 

Every day, for lunch and dinner, Suguro sat right next to him, offering food and snacks, and making sure Rin ate. He caught Rin early in the morning and helped him with homework or studying before classes started. He, and the rest of the dubbed Kyoto Trio, accompanied him through all of the cram classes and through any of the practice exercises. After every gym class, Suguro was there to toss him a water bottle while Konekomaru handed him his change of clothes and Shima drew him unwillingly into conversation. As if that wasn't bad enough, Godaiin thought the whole situation was rather amusing, and had taken to teasing him about it whenever the Kyoto kids were gone. From the time he got to school to the time he left, there was always somebody by his side, if not the entire impromptu group they had formed.

Worse than that, the other kids in the cram classes saw his forced socialization as encouragement to talk to him as well. Shiemi was a constant presence next to him in class (he was sure the Kyoto trio would have been as well, if not for the assigned seats in each class), and even Izumo and Paku took to tagging along with them for dinner, occasionally. When she wasn't embroiled in arguments with Suguro, that was. The week passed by in a confusing thrall of students who seemed determined to stick to him like glue. 

Before he even knew it, he was alone in what used to be his and Yukio's room at the monastery, packing his bags for the upcoming training camp.

Yukio had been sleeping over at the monastery every night after the attack, and had only returned to the dorms earlier that day to pack up his own stuff. While Yukio had a dorm like every other student, Mephisto and Shiro had made the joint agreement that the monastery would be the best place for Rin to stay for now, where Shiro could keep an eye on him while still fufilling his every day duties. Rin would rather have been anywhere else in the world, but as it stood, he guessed that the son of Satan didn't get much of a say in anything. He was only ever in his bedroom, or at the school, so it probably didn't matter much anyways.

(another reason why he was so hungry most days, too tired to protest the kyoto trio's gradual take over of his life. the monastery scared him, sometimes he could see blood on the walls and woke up at ungodly hours of the night with shrieking laughter in his ears and tears in his eyes. his childhood home was a house of horrors and he was trapped)

It was a saturday, and they were supposed to meet up at one of the abandoned dorms to host the training camp, and unfortunately, it was a situation in which he couldn't avoid Yukio and Shiro like he always did. He still had an hour or so of alone time until the church closed and he would be forced to be alone with his dad, but the entire time, he was buzzing with nerves, too busy with stressing over the conversation that he just knew was coming to focus on packing his things. 

Minutes trickled by. The sun gradually began setting, and before he knew it, his room was growing dim with the coming dusk.

Midway through biting the nail off his thumb (it always grew back seconds later, why did he never question that?), there was a short knock on the door.

Rin froze abruptly, eyes widening as he turned to look at the door. He knew what Shiro wanted to talk about, and he’d honestly rather shoot himself in the foot than have that conversation. Against his silent prayers, however, the door knob twisted, and Shiro stepped in, closing the door quietly behind him. 

“Rin,” Shiro greeted, a wry smile on his face. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Ah,” Was all that Rin could say. He looked down at the floor, hands folded in his lap.

Shiro made his way across the room quietly and sat himself down at Rin’s desk chair, sighing as he crossed his arms and leaned back in the chair. A second of silence stretched, before Shiro spoke. 

“I know you better than anyone, Rin,” He said, eyeing him even as Rin avoided eye contact. “I know when you’re avoiding something.”

He shifted uncomfortably. “I’m not-“

“You’re not what? Leaving early in the morning so you don’t have to see us? Coming home late past curfew so you don’t have to talk to us?” Shiro leaned forward, and Rin knew he’d been caught. “You’re ignoring Yukio, as well. You haven’t talked to the other priests, and I haven’t seen you in days. That’s what I would call avoiding, or do you have a different word for it?”

Well, this was exactly as bad as he’d thought it would be, Rin thought to himself. Shiro sat for a long minute, just watching Rin, as if waiting for a reply, some sort of excuse, but he... didn’t have anything to say. Didn’t have anything he wanted to say. He just wished things could go back to the way they were, before Shiro noticed that Rin was avoiding them. 

Or maybe he had always known. He was the paladin, after all. 

The thought was acid at the back of his throat. 

Shiro eventually breathed out a sigh and pulled his glasses off, rubbing at his eyes. “I’m worried for you. You haven’t talked to any of us since Satan’s attack. You can’t keep those kinds of things to yourself-"

“I can’t?” Rin’s mouth was open before he even knew what he was saying. “But you can?”

Shiro blinked in surprise, before frowning. “That was only ever for your own safety.”

“But you can only be so safe as the son of Satan, after all,” He couldn’t stop himself at this point, some strange sort of anger had him in its grasp and he couldn’t break free. “Were you ever gonna tell me? Or was it just supposed to be the monastery’s little secret for you to laugh about behind my back? The greatest exorcist, raising the son of Satan, I’m sure that was a funny joke.”

“Rin-“ Shiro looked as if he couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of Rin’s mouth. 

“Was that the funniest part?” Rin asked, tone dripping with bitterness and anger- maybe it was a testament to how non-human he was, that the world was tinted blue in his anger instead of red. “Or was it every time people called me demon, or monster, or freak, and you really let me believe they were wrong?”

Someone could have heard a pin drop with how quiet the room was afterwards. For the first time in the whole conversation, Rin was looking Shiro in the eyes. He could see the disbelief printed clear across Shiro’s expression, but he was too deep in the bubbling rage in his chest to regret his words now. His eyes itched, and with a frustrated huff he looked down and rubbed at them until the itching went away. The room was still dead silent. 

Shiro’s ringtone played, echoing. He picked it up. 

“What?” Informal as always, Shiro answered whoever it was on the other side of the phone. Rin could faintly hear what they were talking about, something about a demon, and they needed his dad’s immediate assistance. The anger dwindled down into a cold stone in his stomach. 

He already knew what Shiro would chose. 

He looked down at his knees, ignoring Shiro’s insistent stare as he picked at the fabric of his pajama pants. A second of silence stretched again, before his dad sighed, tired. “...I’ll be over as soon as I can. Hold the blockade and set up holy water traps. If they force you back to the house before I can get there, take the client and retreat.”

Another second of silence as the person on the other end of the line spoke, and then he was clicking his phone shut. 

“Good luck,” Rin muttered. 

Shiro stood from the chair, then was still. “We’re not done talking.”

“Sure,” He might not have been done talking, but Rin was. 

He sat at the edge of his bed as Shiro left the room, unwillingly, he knew. The door clicked shut, and only then did Rin stand, absently throwing clothes into his bag. His phone buzzed on the side table, probably that annoying group chat the Kyoto Trio had forced him into. 

Like every other day, he ignored it. 

He tossed in his phone charger before hefting his bag up and stringing it over his shoulder, his school bag in his other hand. He flicked the light off and stepped towards the door, but when he got to the dresser, he paused. He was still for a long moment, then he dropped his two bags to the floor. The key necklace was tucked under his shirt, like always, and he pulled it out to unlock the top drawer. Inside was only two things; a dark colored sword, and a bright red carrying bag. He took the sword out of the drawer, the sheath almost unbearably warm against his palms. He ignored the heat, and instead found himself looking at the seal that used to hold the sheath glued shut. 

Smoking and singed, with the burning handprint of Satan forever scarred through the seal and into the scabbard. ‘As long as this stays sealed, you’ll remain human.’ 

Though exactly how human, Shiro never elaborated on that. Everyone else already seemed to know, didn't they? 

Rin hesitated a moment, then kneeled down to the ground and unzipped his bag. He pushed the clothes aside and shoved the sword deep inside the bag, all the way to the bottom, where he covered it back up with the clothes. He picked up his bags again, opened the door, and left. 

________________________________________

“A test on the first day? Sensei, you’re too brutal!”

Shima collapsed back into the floor, whining the whole time as papers were passed up the table towards Okumura junior, who collected them with a flash of his glasses. “If you expected this camp to be all fun and games, perhaps you should drop out now, Shima.”

Shima clutched his chest and cried out. “So cruel!”

The room devolved into quiet chattering as their teacher shuffled the papers, ordering them by name. Konekomaru laid down next to Shima, thoroughly brain fried as they fell into a conversation about something or other, Suguro wasn’t sure- he thought he vaguely heard something about dinner, but the rest of it was lost in the chatter of the room. He set his pencil aside and stretched his arms up above his head, letting out a quiet groan as his back popped in quite a few places. Test, done, now to return back to his usual mission: annoy Okumura senior into friendship. 

Except, the second his test was passed in, Okumura stood up and left the room without a word. It didn’t seem that out of character for him, but the look of concern and worry that Okumura-sensei shot him definitely was. Suguro frowned to himself, scratching at the scruff on his jaw, but he already knew his decision was made. 

Konekomaru and Shima managed a ‘see ya later’ as Suguro stood up, taking a second to stretch his legs before he sucked in a breath, and set out after Okumura. 

The hallways were lit up in dim lights that flickered and flashed occasionally, probably just a side effect of these buildings being even older than his temple back in Kyoto. Okumura was somehow already out of sight, but a flash of movement caught his eye- the front doors of the dorm closed shut with a click. He made his way over to the doors and opened them quietly, stepping out into the night. The cool breeze felt heavenly on his skin, and did wonders to soothe his growing headache. Damn those surprise tests, they really were more difficult than any test he’d taken before, and his chronic migraines made sure he knew that. 

A street lamp illuminated the front porch of the dorms, cutting a circle of light into the near pitch black of the night. Luckily, however, he didn’t have to look far to find Okumura. The guy was sitting just at the edge of the light, leaning against the wall of the building, head tilted back as he stared up at the sky. The grass crunched under his feet as he walked over to Okumura, sitting down next to him wordlessly. Okumura didn’t bother to acknowledge his presence other than a quiet hum, which didn’t bother him too much. The sounds of the night filled the silence, the squeaking of crickets and a faint breeze rustling through the trees. 

“You gonna interrogate me, too?” Okumura asked after a minute. 

Suguro sighed, leaning his head back against the wall. “Nah, just wanted some fresh air. Didn’t think I’d find you out here. 

“Bullshit,” Okumura snorted, a rueful smile on his face as he looked down. Suguro breathed out a huff of laughter, then the both of them went quiet again. “Yukio’s not out here, y’know. You don’t have to play pretend with me.”

“Who said anything about pretendin’?” Suguro leaned his head down to look at Okumura, but the other boy still had his eyes glued to the horizon, staring at the trees. “You think I’d waste my time just to play a joke on ya?”

“Yes,” Okumura replied, and it was said with such certainty that Suguro felt his words catch in his throat. 

He didn’t have anything to say to that, so he held his tongue, thinking over his words before he spoke again. “Y’know, I was kind of an ass to you before-“

“Kind of?”

“Okay, a colossal ass,” Suguro amended himself, fighting down a grin. It faded after a long minute. “You didn’t deserve it.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” Okumura said quietly. 

“I do, though. It was a dick move,” Suguro insisted. He moved suddenly, shifting around to face the other boy. “I wanna start over.”

He almost laughed at the look of confusion on Okumura’s face. 

“What?”

“Hey,” He greeted. “I’m Suguro Ryuji, nice to meet you.”

Okumura blinked, mouth agape for a long moment, before he breathed out a laugh, shaking his head. “Okumura Rin. You’re really not giving up on this, are you?”

“Not a cha-“

Both of them froze as a sudden scream rung out, a girl’s, from somewhere high above them. 

“What the hell was that?” Suguro hissed, already scrambling to his feet. He held a hand out and helped Okumura to his feet, and the both of them turned to dash back into the building. 

Okumura burst through the doors with a slam, and they stepped into the room to see Okumura-sensei already gathering his guns. His expression was dark as he loaded them with bullets, already leaving the room to run up the stairs. Suguro and Okumura followed barely a second behind, their footsteps thundering up the stairs. A sudden loud groan could be heard even above their racket, sending shivers up Suguro’s spine. 

There was no way in hell that sound could’ve come from a human, which meant that a demon had somehow infiltrated the building. 

His stomach dropped with that realization as Yukio rounded the corner towards the girl’s bathrooms. The clacking of shoes caught his attention- Shiemi ran towards their impromptu group, a grave look on her face. 

“It’s a naberius!” She shouted. There was a second where frustration crossed her expression, and she flung her shoes off with a huff of anger, running barefoot beside them instead. “Paku was injured! Kamiki is holding them off but she won’t last long!”

“Thank you, Shiemi,” Okumura-sensei said, sounding calm even despite the situation. 

The doors to the baths were already shattered and thrown open when they got there. Okumura-sensei stepped through the glass and rounded the lockers- there. Suguro felt his blood run cold as he saw the naberius, such an ugly thing, with twisted, gnarled limbs that curled over- Paku! The girl was collapsed on the ground, sizzling burns decorating her skin, and smoke puffed as Kamiki’s familiars were swiped away. 

“We don’t have much time,” Okumura-sensei said, staring down the growling naberius. “Suguro, on my signal, start chanting the last verse of St. John-“

“Won’t that just enrage it?” He couldn’t help but ask. 

“It’ll draw it towards you,” Okumura-sensei continued. “I’ll defend you while Rin retrieves Paku. Shiemi, be ready for immediate medical treatment. It may be a minute until back up arrives.”

She let out a confident ‘okay!’, her green man that she had summoned that week ready and on her shoulder. Suguro nodded, and sat himself down on the floor, pulling his prayer beads off and clasping them in his hands. He started reading the verse, and instantly, the demon reacted, letting out another croaking roar as it lumbered over towards them. Yukio fired his gun then, unloading rounds of holy water bullets into the naberius’ body. The demon stepped over Paku, leaving her unattended as it turned its attention towards him. 

Suguro watched, nervousness building in his stomach as Rin geared up to complete his part of the plan. As soon as the naberius was clear of Paku, he dashed in, sliding under the distracted demon's limbs over towards the collapsed girl. He picked her up like she weighed little more than a stack of paper, holding her close to his body as he turned back and ran towards the rest of them. Suguro grinned as he chanted. It looked like this really would work-

And then everything went to hell.

The naberius turned its attention away from Suguro even as he chanted its killing verse, and reached a stick like limb out towards Okumura. The demon grabbed his ankle and yanked him back, sending Paku flying out of his arms. Shiemi ran forwards and pulled Paku back to safety, but Suguro's eyes were glued onto the demon that held Okumura up in the air, growls and murmurs echoing from its mouth as it pulled him closer. 

He powered through the verses as quickly as he could, trying desperately to destroy the demon before it could hurt Okumura. Okumura-sensei's bullets were little more than an annoyance to the demon, barely even distracting it as it shifted Okumura to another clawed hand, holding his classmate around the torso.

"Let me go!!" He could hear Okumura screeching, fear raw and unfiltered in his voice.

"Rin! Calm down!" Okumura-sensei was yelling.

"I said, let! Me! Go!"

Okumura's warped voice made his skin crawl, but even more shocking than that, was that the naberius dropped him to the ground. Something audibly cracked. 

"It listened to him?" Shiemi whispered in awe, somewhere behind him. 

Whatever else she could have said was silenced as the naberius gave out an almighty shriek, before bursting into an explosion of black tar. Suguro sucked in a gasp, trying to regain his breath- those verses were always long, and he'd been too panicked to even breathe during his recital. The sound of footsteps coming up the stairs added to the commotion in the room as Konekomaru and Shima burst in, back up exorcists at their heels. 

Someone started tending to Paku, another talked to Okumura-sensei. A blonde haired exorcist came up to him, asking if he had any injuries, but all he could see was Okumura, still exactly where the naberius had dropped him.

His legs were still weak with adrenaline, but he forced himself to stand, waving aside the blonde exorcist to stumble his way over to Okumura. He collapsed down to the ground next to his classmate, in a poor mockery of how they had been sitting together earlier. Okumura looked up then, but to his surprise, the guy didn’t seem very phased at all, a faint wince twisting his expression as he held an arm around his stomach. Either he had imagined that fear, or Okumura was just a good actor. 

“You good?” 

“Yeah, just-“ Okumura wheezed, clutching his stomach tighter. “-think I broke a rib or something.”

Suguro waved one of the medic exorcists back over, and the man immediately set to examining Okumura’s torso. There was already the beginnings of a bruise wrapping around Okumura’s stomach in the shape of the demon’s hand, and Suguro winced when he saw it. 

“That looks like shit,” He commented, leaning back to lay himself down on the ground. 

“Thanks,” Okumura said dryly. “Are you good?”

“Mmh,” Suguro rubbed at his eyes, before letting his arms flop back down on the ground. “I think my entire life flashed before my eyes.”

“Sounds boring.”

“Fuck off.”

“Heh.”

Suguro grinned to himself as he closed his eyes, making himself comfortable on the floor. Maybe he could just sleep here, for a few minutes. 

And sleep, he did.

* * *

Izumo was sure that she had to be the most useless person in existence.

As exorcists came in and out of the room, murmuring and calling out to each other, she crouched low behind the walls of shelves. She couldn't bear to let anyone see her, not half naked and crying like she was. It was embarrassing. It was humiliating. She'd failed to even defend her best friend, and now she was hiding and crying like a coward! After all the big talk she'd made!

There was the sound of shuffling feet and grunts as something was lifted, and as she looked up and beyond the shelves, she could see Paku, her Paku, passed out and carried on a stretcher. Anguish twisted in her chest, and Izumo fought back a sniffle as she wiped at her tears. Even now, she was too scared to get up and help. How could she look anyone in the eye, like she was?

"Kamiki?"

Her eyes widened, and stomach dropped as a head of dark hair poked around to peek at her.

Okumura, of course, was looking at her, concerned. As if he hadn't almost just been pummeled by that naberius himself, just a few minutes ago!

"Go ahead and laugh," She hissed, defensive. "I'm sure I look real stupid."

"What?" Okumura blinked, then frowned. "Of course not, why the hell would I make fun of you?"

Izumo huffed, and curled in on herself, rubbing furiously at her tears. "Because I'm useless. I couldn't even help my best friend! She's hurt and it's all my fault!"

He didn't say anything to that, and there was a beat of awkward silence as he stood, motionless. Then, out of the corner of her eye, she watched as he pulled a towel down from one of the shelves, and stepped over to kneel down beside her. What was he doing? Her eyes were wide as he drew the towel up over her shoulders, covering her body. Stunned, she reached up, holding onto the towel.

"Sometimes, bad things happen," He started, and as she looked up, he looked as uncomfortable as he sounded. "And people get hurt, and you can't really do anything, and it sucks. You just gotta... keep moving. Be better, I guess."

His awkwardness was enough to make her laugh, just a little bit. "That was painful to watch."

He smiled, too, running a hand over his face. "Shut up, I'm trying."

"Well, you didn't help," She said, matter-of-fact, but surprisingly, Okumura only breathed out a laugh through his nose.

"I figured," He replied, then a beat of silence as she pulled the towel tighter over her shoulders. "For what it's worth, I think you're pretty strong."

"...thanks, I guess."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-0KC83vYfVQ-2freQveH43PWxuab2uWDEGolzrNoIks/mobilebasic  
> blacklivesmatter.com
> 
> YouTube videos for education: All Cops Are Bad (Thought Slime), The problem with saying "All Lives Matter" (Mic), The Best Explanation of Black Lives Matter On the Internet (Charity Croff), What The World Needs To Know About BLM (HuffPost)
> 
> As always, comments and criticisms are appreciated!


	4. an office, a rooftop and a family friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for not being able to update on sunday like I usually do, life has just been busy. In the future, if I don’t update on sundays, I’ll likely do the same thing I’m doing now and update on a wednesday! 
> 
> chapter warnings: Reference to character injury, violence

"Your vital signs are steady, and it looks like you're clear of the naberius' poison. You should be clear to go in just a few days with some rest," Yukio murmured quietly. "We'll halt the training camp until you've recovered, it certainly wouldn't be fair to you to miss an opportunity because of our oversight."

Paku smiled up at him from the bunk-turned-hospital bed, expression gentle. "Thank you, Okumura-sensei, for everything."

"It's no trouble!" He assured, faking a cheer he didn't feel. "Call me if you need anything, alright? I'll be just down the hall."

"Yes, sensei. Thank you again."

He nodded, and turned to start packing his supplies away in his medical bag, capping bottles and closing boxes to put them back in his kit. Thankfully, Paku's burns were clean and set to heal up nicely, thanks to Shiemi's quick thinking with her herbs and greenman. If she would just get over her silly nicknames for the herbs and plants she used, she would have no trouble at all pursuing a doctor meister. She would be a natural at it.

"Sensei?"

"Ah, I'm sorry, I got lost in thought for a minute," He shook his head and plastered on a smile for Paku as he hefted his bag over his shoulder. "Good night, Paku."

"Night, sensei!"

He crossed the room towards the door, opening it only to come face to face with a distressed and anxious looking Kamiki. She didn't hesitate to push past him and into the room without so much as a greeting or an 'excuse me', going to sit herself at Paku's bedside. Yukio was left standing by the doorway, alongside Shiemi who peeked past him at the other two girls. He just sighed softly to himself and stepped outside into the hallway, closing the door partially behind him. Shiemi was sending him concerned looks, the same looks she always gave him when she wanted to say or ask something, but didn't know how to start off on the subject.

"Yes, Shiemi?" He prompted. She was one of his dearest friends, but sometimes, getting her to say what was on her mind could be torturous.

"Yuki, about yesterday," She started, then hesitated. Her hand came up to her mouth so she could bite at her nail. "You, Suguro and I were the only ones who saw it, right? How did... why did that naberius listen to him?"

That was a question that he still didn't have the answers to, but he did know one thing- he couldn't allow anyone to suspect that Rin was anything more or less than a regular page.

"Some exorcists with diluted demon blood have been documented to be able to, well, speak to demons, in a loose sense. It's commonly assumed that the demon is so surprised that a human can understand it, that they can be more easily convinced to complete contracts or other tasks," He explained. Complete bullshit, of course, but Yukio had to learn how to lie fast over the years, and this was easy in comparison. "It's pretty common and useful for tamers."

Shiemi, naive and trusting as she was, brightened up, her eyes widening. "Oh! That makes sense! Will Okumura be applying for tamer in the exam, then?"

"I'm not sure. You'd have to ask him yourself."

"I'll definitely do that!" She said, smiling. "I'm going to go see Paku and Kamiki now, but thank you anyways Yuki!"

He stepped aside to let her pass through the door. "You're wlcome, and good night."

Yukio heard her greet the other two girls in the room as the door closed shut with a click, and the answering shouts from Kamiki, but the room grew quiet soon afterwards. He took a brief few seconds so sigh and rub at his eyes, trying to force the tiredness away. As if being an exorcist and a teacher wasn't hard enough, they were shorthanded around this time of year, and he was nearly drowning under the massive workload he was accruing. It was exhausting, and he was starting to zone out and doze off during his normal classes now. Maybe he should invest in some sort of coffee? He pondered it idly to himself as he straightened and began the walk towards the relatively clean dorm that he'd taken for himself.

“Yo, Yukio!”

He turned back to see Shiro walking leisurely down the hall, a relaxed grin on his face as he waved at Yukio. He felt a bit of the tension ease off as soon as he saw his father; maybe the training camp wouldn’t be such a hassle with a second hand on deck. 

“Good afternoon, father.”

“I got the report on the incident from yesterday. Like always, Mephisto’s putting these kids through the wringer,” Shiro sighed, rubbing at the back of his head as he came to walk alongside Yukio. “Any unexpected developments?”

Yukio recognized the meaning behind his question for what it was, and kept his eyes straight ahead as they walked. “It seems as if Rin may have some talent for tamer, if he were to apply himself.”

“Tamer? Geez,” Shiro whistled. “You think he gets it from me?” Father, Satan, fire. _Did he flare up?_

“No, probably from mom,” He sighed, internally grateful. Thankfully, Rin hadn’t flared up during the incident, something that Shiro seemed to share his gratitude on. There was a brief second of quiet between the two of them, before Shiro suddenly made a noise, smacking his fist into his hand. 

“That’s what it was!” He turned to Yukio, and something in his eyes seemed to speak utmost seriousness even as he grinned as usual. “I forgot Kuro’s catnip wine in my office. You want to come say hi to the priests with me?”

“Ah, sure,” Yukio knew better than to question it, but he felt his stomach twist a bit in nervousness at the underlying message. What could be so serious that Shiro needed to talk to both him and the priests? 

Shiro stepped over to one of the side doors along the hallway, pulling out a ring loaded with dozens of keys. He withdrew one and inserted it into the lock, holding the door open for Yukio to step through. Only when Shiro had walked through the door and closed it securely behind him did his grin drop, replaced instead by an expression of grim seriousness. To Yukio’s surprise, the other priests were already gathered in Shiro’s office, all sharing Shiro’s same expression of dead seriousness. Yukio sat himself down in one of the cheap chairs by the wall, while Shiro made his way to sit at his desk. His father leaned his elbows on his desk, steepling his fingers underneath his chin. 

"I had a talk with Rin, before he left for his training camp. He completely lost his cool," Shiro sighed. “He believes that because he’s a half demon, somehow all the bullying was justified. He thinks that lying to him was a joke for us. Not only that, but eyes were acting up. I can’t say for sure if he noticed, but it was identical to when he first awoke the flame.”

“He was even able to call the naberius off at the camp,” Yukio murmured. 

“Is the seal safe?” Izumi asked. 

“I don’t know. Rin has the sword.”

Maruta frowned. “Would he tell us if something was wrong with it?”

The silence that stretched across the room was answer enough. 

“Then I guess we need to ask him about it,” Nagatomo said quietly, reluctance in his posture.

“We need to ask him about the events of that night, as well,” Shiro added, frowning. “I don’t want to force him into reliving it, but there’s only so much I can do to keep the order off of his back. They need answers, and Rin is the only one who has them all. It won’t be long before they bring him in for questioning themselves.”

“And obviously, that would be a disaster,” Maruta deduced. 

Shiro nodded. “As much as I hate to say it, we need to pressure him a little bit.”

“Is it worth closing him off from us forever?” Yukio asked, quiet. 

“I would prefer that he hate us and be alive, than love us and be dead,” Shiro’s words were solemn. He didn’t say it lightly. His expression lightened after a second, however. “I won’t ask you to do this.”

Yukio shook his head. “No, I want him to be safe. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

“Then first things first, we need to get him alone.”

* * *

“Yo, Okumura.”

Ryuji frowned to himself as he kicked at the other bed in the dorm, and even though the bed creaked in protest, its occupant didn’t move even a muscle. On one hand, it was a little odd, and almost endearing to see his classmate sleeping so peacefully- but not endearing enough to make Ryuji okay with missing his routine. He wasn’t going to be back in the dorm after he left this time, and he knew he’d catch shit if Rin was late to class. Thankfully, this was their last day in the old decrepit dorms until the training camp was to resume later

“Hey, Okumura!” He kicked at the bed more aggressively, raising his voice. “I’m not gonna be late because ‘a you, get up!”

Despite his near shouting, Okumura was still dead asleep, snoring quietly with his head buried in his pillow. With a low growl, Ryuji leaned forward and yanked Okumura’s sheets off, throwing the wadded up blankets at his classmate’s head. It hit its mark with a soft _whump_ , and Okumura let out an ‘oof’. He was still for a moment longer, then he rolled over onto his side, yawning sleepily as he pushed himself to sit up. His hair was thoroughly mussed, looking more like a wild bush than any sort of hairstyle. Ryuji scoffed and rolled his eyes, turning to sit himself down on his own bed, just opposite Okumura’s. 

“Wha’ time issit?” Okumura asked, voice hoarse and dry. He slapped at the dresser until he hit the bottle of water he set out the night before, and brought it up to his lips to sip at it. 

“It’s six.”

“Seriously?” Okumura looked at him incredulously, eyes as wide as they could be with how sleepy he was. “I don’t even usually get up for another hour.”

“Well, now you’re up,” Ryuji replied, standing up to start gathering his books together. He’d left them sort of spread out the night before, but it looked like the wind had blown a few of his papers across the room. “Just get started early on your morning routine or somethin’.”

He spent a minute or so putting his homework away in folders, and it was only after a rather long time had passed that he realized that Okumura hadn’t ever said anything back. He looked over to the other side of the room to see Okumura staring down at his bottle of water listlessly, moving the straw around the lip of it. Ryuji was stuck with the sudden feeling that he had said something wrong- but what? What did he say? 

“Don’t you have stuff to do in the morning?” He prodded, trying to salvage the conversation.

Okumura pulled his legs up and leaned his chin on his knee, shrugging. “I mean... I used to cook breakfast for everyone.”

Something had changed at home then, if he was talking in past tense. That made sense, then. Obviously, Okumura-sensei and the paladin had something to do with it, or were involved, if Okumura’s discomfort around them was anything to go off of. 

Interesting. 

“Then how ‘bout you make something for me, huh?” He grinned as Okumura perked up. “Call it payback for all those lunches.”

“So they did come with a price tag,” His classmate asked wryly. 

He snickered. “Nope. But if I knew you could cook, I woulda just brought you groceries ‘n shit.”

“You’d really do that?” The question was asked jokingly, but Ryuji could catch the hesitance behind it. 

“Of course,” He answered easily, waving his hand as he pulled his bag over his shoulder. “You could probably use the mini kitchen in our dorms if ya wanna. I don’t think Shima or Koneko would care.”

“Wh- really?” Okumura perked up a bunch at that, nearly launching himself out of his bed to follow behind Ryuji. He held the door open for his shorter classmate to step through, locking it with a key on his lanyard before tucking it back into his pocket. Okumura was still staring at him incredulously when he turned around, blue eyes wide. “You’d really let me?”

“Sure, can’t see why not,” Ryuji shrugged, turning to make his way towards the kitchens. “The three of us’ll eat just about anything ya give us, so go wild.”

Okumura shuffled after him quietly for a minute, after which he let out a soft “Thank you.”

“Don’t sweat it. It’s a win-win scenario,” Ryuji said, giving Okumura a grin over his shoulder. The guy looked oddly melancholy, but he decided not to comment on it. “You get the homework done from last night?”

“Yeah, but I’m gonna be honest, my answers for that math sheet are making me hella nervous. Everything’s rounding up to whole numbers and it’s suspicious,” Okumura sighed. 

“I’ll check your answers for ya, later.”

“Will do!” Okumura chirped back, his entire aura seeming brighter now . Did cooking really make him that excited?

Well, it must have, because as they made the trek down to the kitchens, Okumura steadily sped up his walking. At one point, he was walking next to Ryuji, but the closer they got, the faster he got, until he eventually outpaced Ryuji completely. As soon as the doors to the cafeteria were in sight, Okumura dashed forward with a giggle and darted into the the kitchens. Ryuji rolled his eyes and followed after him, the doors closing shut behind him with an echoing click as he stepped past the tables and towards the back kitchen, where Okumura was already pulling pots and pans out. He pulled a stool up to the island and set his stuff down, pulling out some of his textbooks to read through. 

It didn’t take long for Rin to find the food he was looking for, and he quickly starting cooking things, filling the kitchen with a sweet smell as he twirled and twisted around the room. Ryuji was content to let him do his thing, focusing his own attention on his reading. The pattering of Okumura’s feet as he ran about became another part of the background noise, along with the low hum of a fire and the sizzling of whatever Okumura was cooking. Eventually, his classmate settled down at one stove top, happily humming to himself as the tapping of feet carried on in the background. 

Wait. Feet? 

Neither he nor Okumura were moving. 

“Hey-“ Before he could even get a full sentence out, one of the bowls on the counter toppled forwards, and would’ve fallen to the ground if Okumura hadn’t caught it. Just as soon as that happened, another bowl skittered forward, and then a plate. All at once, the dishes seemed to be flying off the shelves, too fast for Okumura to catch them. Ryuji stood up from his stool warily and grabbed Okumura’s shoulder to keep the guy from backing into him, steadying them both. They both shared a look of brief panic as the dishes continued to revolt. 

“Earthquake?” Okumura asked, having to raise his voice to be heard over the crashing of dishes. 

“Nothing else is moving!” The kitchen was still, all except for the suddenly weightless plates and bowls that flew at all angles. Okumura slapped at Ryuji’s chest, but when he tried to ask just what the hell his classmate wanted, Okumura didn’t look at him, turning wide eyes towards the corner of the kitchen. Ryuji followed his line of sight and saw it-

A purple demon, decorated in horns and taller than them both combined, standing very, _very_ angry by the wall. 

For a second, both he and Okumura froze. The demon was snorting angrily, a pot and a pan clutched in either hand that he waved at the two of them. 

“Run?” Okumura whispered. 

Eyes still glued to the demon, Ryuji merely nodded. 

Okumura grabbed his hand and yanked him back, dashing around the island and towards the doors. Ryuji had barely gotten his wits about himself when he felt something hard crack against the back of his head, following by a loud clattering on the ground. He stopped, stared back at the demon, then the pot on the ground, then the demon again. “Did you just throw a pot at me?!”

Before he could get fully offended, Rin darted forward and grabbed the pot, throwing it with enough force to send the demon stumbling back with a short growl. 

“Fuck off!” Okumura shouted.

The demon growled loudly in response, and pans began flying off the shelves rapid fire, catapulting towards the two of them. Ryuji yelped as Okumura suddenly shoved him down, but as soon as the hail of dishes slowed, his classmate was pushing him up and shoving him forward. As soon as they were out the doors of the kitchen and into the cafeteria, Okumura yanked him behind a table. The barrage of pots and pans finally came to a halt then, the last few bouncing off the table and hitting the floor somewhere behind them. Okumura scowled and leaned his head over the top of the table. 

“The hell’s your problem anyways!”

The demon growled, and Okumura ducked as a skillet was thrown. Ryuji grabbed him by the collar and yanked him down to his level. 

“He’s probably some sort of household demon,” Ryuji hissed to him, eyeing the demon warily. “We got all up in his shit, so he got pissed.”

“Well maybe, he should stop being so damn rude and share the kitchen some time!” Okumura shouted at the demon, more peeved than actually angry at this point. 

“It’s his domain, dude, he’s just defending it,” Ryuji explained in a hushed whisper. “How would you feel if some stranger just came in your house and started wrecking your shit?”

Okumura stopped then, and Ryuji watched as a myriad of emotions crossed his face before it eventually settled on understanding. He stood up then, ignoring Ryuji’s hissed demands that he _sit back down, dammit, do you want to die?!_ to look the demon in the eyes. 

“Hey!” Okumura called, stone in his spine but gentleness in his tone. “I’m sorry we touched your shit, alright? If I had known it was yours, I wouldn’ta touched it.”

The demon let out a cacophony of grumpy sounding growls, but Ryuji was shocked to see that it lowered the pan in its hand, expression dulling from angry to some sort of... pouting? Okumura sighed and crossed his arms, a sympathetic frown in his face. 

“Again, I’m sorry, we weren’t trying to make a mess, do you want us to go in and clean up? I mean, it’s gonna be a lil difficult since you catapulted all your shit at us, but if it’ll make you feel better.”

To Ryuji’s surprise, Okumura was being genuine, and he didn’t hear any reluctance in his voice at all. The demon let out another series of growls and grunts, and seemed almost sheepish after Okumura’s words. Ryuji... wasn’t understanding any of this. He guessed it made sense, since Okumura was just talking to that Naberious like, the night before, but how was he talking to the demons? That wasn’t possible, right? Demons didn’t speak any intelligent language, besides maybe the higher level demons, but right now, it looked like Okumura understood them just as easily as he understood anyone else. Not only that, but he was negotiating with the thing, too, conversing with it. 

Ryuji tried to think of some explanation for it, but he couldn’t. 

“...want a piece, or something?”

Ryūji startled, almost afraid that Okumura was picking a fight, but the guy’s face was calm, and surprisingly, so was the demon. The pot and pan in the demon’s hands had lowered, and he seemed more relaxed than before. 

“Yeah, dude, I don’t mind cooking for three,” Okumura said. “Though maybe we should get that mess cleaned up first, yeah?”

To his surprise, Okumura leaped over the table, and brushed past the demon back into the kitchen. Ryūji, utterly confused, hesitantly followed after him, tossing the demon a wary look as the horned thing huffed a bit, but didn’t throw anything as he followed after Ryuji. 

“Uh, hey, Okumura, yeah, what the fuck?” He whispered. 

Okumura shot a grin back at him, before leaning down to pick up a few skillets and utensils. “Don’t worry about it, dude. His name’s Ukobach, he’s the cooking spirit here. How do you feel about omelette and shit? It’s been a while since I made those.”

The demon- Ukobach let out a pleased huff of air, coincidentally right down Ryuji’s neck, who couldn’t do much more than give an unsure grin and a shaky thumbs up.

* * *

“Hello, father.”

Yukio’s voice was quiet, just enough that he could hear Suguro and Rin’s chatting over math homework in the kitchen. He held the phone close to his mouth, speaking softly even though the seemingly inane conversation was likely enough to throw anyone off. 

“Yes, Suguro and Rin were in the kitchen just earlier, seems like Rin has more of an aptitude for tamer than we thought,” He forced a smile, though his heart was pounding harsh and fast in his chest. “He was messing around with the cooking spirit, Ukobach, you remember? Imagine that, Rin with a kitchen assistant. Hardly like he needs it.”

There was a murmur on the other end of the phone, and Yukio was glad that no one else was in the hallway, because his smile was feeling more plastic by the second. 

“I really do think we should have a talk with him about his meister, you know. The test is just this week, right?”

And with other exorcists there to facilitate the exam, there was no telling how long it would be before Rin exposed himself to the whole order. 

“How about this afternoon?”

* * *

“Y’know, of all the places to be avoidin’ doin’ homework, I’m not sure the roof is the best place.”

Okumura looked back at him, a little startled, but then he held up his binder, displaying the homework Ryūji had been sure he was skipping out on. He let out a huff of laughter, shaking his head as he stepped forward to crouch down next to Okumura. 

“Point taken. What’s up with you, though? Godain said you got the hell out of dodge as soon the bell rang, like, and I quote, ‘the devil was on your heels’.” Okumura seemed to pale a bit at that, and Ryūji blinked as he realized what exactly he had said, cursing under his breath. “Sorry, dude, I-“ What, he forgot? That would sound even worse. Ugh. “Sorry. Bad joke.”

“It’s fine,” Okumura waved his hand, and Ryūji pretended he hadn’t heard the little tremor in his voice. 

After a second or two of Okumura scribbling on his sheet, Ryūji spoke again. “So? Reason?”

Okumura sighed, reluctance in every inch of his body, but he answered anyways. 

“...my dad, and Yukio,” He said quietly. “They keep wanting to drag me into a conversation, and I-“

“Would rather die?” Ryūji finished, and smiled at Okumura’s huff of laughter. “What about?”

“The collection of tissues under my bed,” Okumura answered wryly. 

Ryūji snorted, and the two of them laughed for a second, but it wasn’t long until Okumura was picking at his uniform pants nervously again. Ryūji frowned a bit to himself, moving to actually sit down next to Okumura and lean against his shoulder. When the guy didn’t jerk away, Ryūji relaxed, and peered out at the skyline. 

“Is that why yer not comin’ to school with lunches?” Ryūji asked, and his voice was low. 

“What?” Okumura leaned upwards, jostling Ryūji, and his eyes were wide. Ryūji raised an eyebrow, and Okumura spluttered, throwing his hands up as if waving off some invisible enemy, face bright red. “No! No, no, I mean, yes, but- not for the reason you’re thinking, no! They’re not- nothing bad, nobody’s- I mean, fuck. Nobody’s hittin’ me, if that’s what you’re getting at!”

“Not like much evidence pointed to anythin’ else,” Ryūji chuckled, and Okumura let out a groan, rubbing at his eyes. 

“No, no, it’s just- they wanna talk. About,” He hesitated, and leaned his chin on his hands, staring down at the pavement. “Y’know. Feelings.”

Ryūji stared at him for a long second, then snorted, snickering to himself. “Seriously?”

“What!” Okumura looked up at him, indignant and still red faced. 

“You can throw a skillet at an angry demon, but heart-to-heart talks are yer great big weakness?” Ryūji said with a smile, looking away as Okumura rolled his eyes. “I’ll remember that, if ya ever go rogue, loser.”

Okumura tensed, but Ryūji didn’t think much about it. It was a second later that he realized the reason why, probably the heavy footsteps coming up the stairwell. 

“Shit,” Okumura hissed. 

“That them?”

“Yeah,” Okumura scrambled to his feet, gathering up his materials quickly and standing up. He looked over at Ryūji, eyes desperate. “Don’t let them know I’m here. Please?”

Normally, Ryūji would’ve scoffed and said no, but something about the fear in Okumura’s eyes made him pause. Against his better judgement, he nodded. Okumura smiled breathlessly, gratitude written across his face before he ducked behind the air vent, completely hidden from sight. Ryūji looked away from the vent as the door opened, and waved at Okumura-sensei when his teacher stepped out. 

“Ah, Suguro,” Okumura-sensei smiled politely, as he always did. It was hard to believe that Okumura was so scared of this guy. Also, damn, having two Okumuras to keep track of was annoying. “You do know roof access is restricted, right?”

“Yeah, sorry teach, just needed some fresh air to breathe,” Ryūji said, and reached up to scratch at his chin sheepishly. “I’ll be down in just a minute. Everybody’s still on for the 5:00 lesson, right?”

“Yes, and, well, just be careful, alright?” Okumura-sensei acquiesced, and Ryūji supposed it had something to do with how friendly he was being with Okumura that Okumura-sensei simply nodded. Ugh, gross, shared sibling names sucked. Yukio, however, turned on his way with another smile, and went back down the stairs. 

After a minute or so, Okumura poked his head out from the vent, eyes wide. “He gone?”

“Yeah, but ya really shouldn’t be avoidin’ this much longer,” Ryuji sighed, moving a hand to his hip. “I’m guessin’ it’s about the possession, right?”

Okumura visibly flinched at that, and looked down. 

“I thought so,” Ryuji said with a frown. After a second, he sighed again, then moved forward to pat Okumura’s shoulder somewhat awkwardly. “Listen, dude, I know it’s not really my place and all, but... sometimes talkin’ it out helps. Everyone gets to air their dirty laundry and shit, y’know? Plus, it’s not really like ya can avoid ‘em forever. Better to go to them and have this whole showdown on your own terms.”

Okumura was quiet for a long second, his face completely hidden from Ryuji’s view, but then he tilted his head up and flashed a grin that looked just a bit too tight around the corners. 

“I’ll think about it, thanks,” It sounded forced, and barely a moment later, Okumura was walking off towards the stairwell, fingers white knuckles on his notebooks. Ryuji could’ve kicked himself. He wanted to be friendly with the guy, but he never knew what exactly would close him off. It looked like he’d done it again, overstepping his boundaries and making Okumura uncomfortable. He rubbed at his neck, and just before Okumura stepped down the stairs, he raised his voice again. 

“Lemme check your answers tonight, yeah?” Are we good? was the unspoken sentiment, but to his relief, Okumura looked back and smiled, a bit more relaxed this time. 

“Sure thing, dude.”

Ryuji smiled back, and waved. “See ya."

* * *

“Yo.”

If it were any other situation, Shiro would have laughed at how Rin jumped, like a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar. As it was, his smile was more bitter than anything, that his son was so nervous around his own damn family. Yukio was a bit further down the stairwell, looking distressed as he always did in these situations, but Shiro had taken front and center before the door, to afford Rin the least chances to escape. It was more a precaution than anything, but as he watched his oldest son tense up, he was struck with the feeling that if he hadn’t done so, Rin really would have just run away. 

“Say, I think it’s been a few days since you’ve seen the monastery, huh?” Shiro slung an arm around Rin’s shoulder, trying to ignore his son’s flinch, and pulled the key ring out of his pocket, spinning it on his finger. “Let’s go give the priests a quick visit, huh?”

Without waiting for Rin to protest, he turned towards the door and inserted a little silver key, then opened it up to reveal the monastery. He led Rin in first, knowing that Yukio would retrieve the keys and close the door behind him. As he expected, Yukio did, which left them in Shiro’s office. He, a little forcibly, sat Rin down in one of the side chairs, and instead of sitting at his own desk, pulled another chair over, and sat down beside Rin. His eldest son looked... more uncomfortable than Shiro could recall ever seeing him in his life, which was surprising considering the amount of shit Rin tended to get up to. 

“Rin,” He said gently, but even so, Rin tensed, drawing his feet up into the chair and crossing his arms over his knees. Shiro would lecture him about getting dirt on the cushions later. “None of us are trying to scare you.”

“Yo, is that the chicken I hear?”

The occupants of the room looked up as pounding, unsteady footsteps made their way to the study. Barely a few seconds later, the door opened up to reveal a woman with red hair, and- one of Shiro’s best whiskeys in hand! Dammit, he had been saving that one!

“Shura,” He said lowly, but she interrupted with a grin before he could get another word out. 

“Relaaaaax, old man, I’ll buy you a new one,” She soothed, which was a little undermined by the fact that the bottle was already half emptied. Shiro sighed and took his glasses off to rub at the bridge of his nose as she hopped up on his desk, crossing her legs and making herself very comfortable on his expensive wooden furniture. If she spilled any of that damn whiskey on anything in the room, he was going to toss her out, for real this time. 

“Who is that?” Rin asked quietly, an eyebrow raised. 

Yukio answered for him. “That’s Shura Kirigakure, she’s a-“

“Family friend!” Shura chirped. 

“-pest,” Yukio finished pointedly, throwing a worried look at Rin, who just leaned further down into his knees. Wrong word choice, dammit. Shiro shot a glare towards Shura, who smiled the smile of someone who didn’t know, and definitely didn’t care. “She’s here to take a statement for the Vatican.”

“This is the next step before they bring you in for questioning themselves, Rin,” Shiro warned, looking away from Shura to his eldest son, who looked very much like he was trying to become part of the chair at that moment.

Plus, they could protect him here, in a safe environment. There was no telling the lengths the Vatican would go to get the answers they wanted, and that could be incredibly disastrous if they made Rin flare up. This whole thing would go up in flames, and not just metaphorically. 

“All ya gotta do is tell me what went down, sprat, and I’ll be on my way,” Shura said, though it sounded hardly genuine what with the way she slurred part of it. 

“There’s not much to tell,” Rin muttered. “D- Father Fujimoto was possessed by Satan and almost died.”

“But we need the details, kiddo,” Shura said, pressing. “Anything ya got, ya never know what could save our asses down the line. Connect the dots for us. All we know, is one minute he was possessed by the highest ranking demon in existence, which shoulda killed him, and the next minute he’s completely fine,” Everybody refrained from mentioning the missing fingers on Shiro’s hands. Shura winced at what she had said, but continued on regardless. “Mostly. Anyways what happened in between, huh? It’s either this, or Angel, and that guy’s an ass. You’ll like me much better.”

“Debatable,” Yukio huffed, leaning back in his chair. Shura merely grinned, before looking at Rin. 

“You’re asking someone who doesn’t know jack shit about exorcism still, you’re not gonna get much valuable stuff,” Rin pointed out, but Shiro saw the lines of tension in his frame. Were Shura actually concerned about the whole investigation, that answer would’ve fallen apart in seconds. “All I know is some demon took over his body, started spouting shit about uniting Genna and Assah or something like that, I don’t know what any of it meant. I don’t even know if the guy was talking human the whole time, I barely understood any of that.”

“Joining Assiah and Gehenna, huh,” Shura murmured to herself. “Interesting.”

“But not anything we didn’t already know,” Mephisto said, tapping his umbrella on his shoe. 

"True," Shiro hummed in agreement.

Wait, Mephisto?

“The hell are you doing here?” Shiro asked, incredulous. “And when?”

“Oh please, my dear friend, you didn’t really think I wouldn’t be here to hear it first hand? Silly,” Mephisto smiled, but it was clear he was more interested in what Rin had to say. “Well, go on.”

“Okay,” Rin said slowly, eyebrows furrowed in confusion that he, thankfully, kept to himself. “He just said something like, y’know, there was no point in destroying a body he could use later, so he... fucked off, I guess, somewhere.”

“And the ripped off fingers?” Shura asked. 

“Some ritual or whatever, I don’t know. He looked, well, less dead after, I guess.”

“Healing?” Shiro murmured, glancing up at Mephisto. 

Mephisto shrugged. “It’s within the realm of possibilities.”

But what Rin said couldn’t have been the whole truth, of course. Shiro was grateful that Rin had enough tact to keep the whole, Satan stealing him back to Gehenna part under wraps, alongside himself being the son of Satan, or having anything to do with the demon. Could that really have been the truth? It was possible, which Shiro couldn’t say aloud, that Satan had wanted to save his body, since he was of the same type of clone as Satan’s body from so many years ago. That, and with everything Satan had done, it wasn’t impossible that he had found some way to heal the body he was possessing. 

He couldn’t... prove or disprove anything Rin had said, but something just didn’t feel _right_. 

Shura leaned forward, waving the bottle previously. “Okay, start from the beginning again, kid. You gotta give more detail than that.”

“Shura,” Yukio leveled her with a warning look, which she shrugged off. 

“Look, I don’t wanna make anyone relive more trauma than they gotta, whatever,” That was a lie, Yukio knew. Shura couldn’t care less. “But you give me a good story here, and I get the Vatican off of your tails. Last thing you want is them to sick Angel or one of the arch knights on your case- I heard that guy took some poor bastard’s arm off when he wasn’t talking enough. I can’t remember if the dude lived after that.”

Shiro could hear the stutter in Rin’s breathing, and he couldn’t help but think that was too much, even for her. “Shura. That’s enough.”

“I’m just saying,” She sing-songed, but in deference to Shiro, was quiet after that. 

Rin didn’t say anything for a long moment, staring at his knees as the pressure started mounting. When he spoke, Shiro, and anyone in the room for that matter, could see through the thin veil of disinterest. 

“He and I had an argument that night,” Rin started, wisely avoiding the cross-city escapade of avoiding demons that they had. “I said something mean, and I guess it must’ve been meaner than I thought because that freak-“

Rin’s throat seized and his teeth clacked shut, and Shiro winced in sympathy- that must have been the worst part. 

“Satan had been trying to get at me for days before that,” He said, gently. “It wasn’t your fault,” At that, he looked back up at Shura, who was frowning. “I never said anything about it because it was nothing new. Satan’s been egging at me as long as I can remember, it was never a true problem until then.”

“Is he still, yknow... there?” Shura asked, curious.

At that, Shiro hesitated. Was he still there? He'd gotten so swept up in recent events that it hadn't even occurred to him that the voice he was so used to tuning out was gone. He hadn't even noticed it- maybe he really was getting old. When he spoke again, he spoke slowly. “No, actually. That’s odd. He hasn’t been this quiet in a long time. It’s as if he’s not even there anymore.”

“We’ve seen that demons can take the damage that their host takes when they’re being possessed,” Yukio offered up. “Maybe the wounds dad took incapacitated him for a while.”

Shiro saw the trembling of Yukio’s hand, and the avoidant gaze of Rin. Well, he couldn’t let his boys think that he’d be taken down that easy! He forced a grin. “He must be a real pussy, then, if I’m alive and kicking and he’s down there licking his wounds!”

“Dad!” Yukio exclaimed, a startled little laugh popping out. 

“So quick to tempt him,” Mephisto chuckled. “Are you really chancing a second round?”

“Let him try,” Shiro declared. “Now that I know he’s coming for real, he won’t make it up here a second time!”

Shura laughed, taking a long drink from the bottle. “Like you’ll live that long, old man. Isn’t it time for you to start looking at retirement homes?”

“He’s not that old!” Yukio valiantly protested against the accusation. 

“ _That_ old? So you agree that I’m old?” Shiro asked, wounded.

“Yeah, sure, we can debate your age later,” Shura waved a hand, then looked at Rin, who was pointedly not looking at anyone. Ah, shit. Shiro could’ve kicked himself- what better way to rub in the fact that this had all been hidden from Rin, than to fall into friendly, familiar conversation with people who they knew that Rin didn’t? Shit, he was an idiot. “We got a story to finish.”

“Dad was possessed...” Yukio prompted quietly, letting Rin continue.

“Yeah,” Rin was damn near hidden behind those legs of his, eyes downcast. “I thought he was dying, even before that stupid ritual. Satan was opening up some kind of... portal, I guess, after he ripped off dad’s fingers.”

“The Gehenna Gate,” Mephisto murmured, lost in thought.

Rin nodded. “That, I guess. He said he was gonna join the worlds, or something. Like I said, I could barely understand what he was saying, but I- I told him that dad was gonna die. I didn’t think he’d care, but he stopped, for a minute. He said something about needing the body, and he told me that... he said ‘if this body holds up so well, maybe yours will work some day too’.”

Shiro's expression darkened. “I’d like to see him try.”

“It was probably just some threat to scare you,” Shura said, and awkward as it was, it was probably her attempt at comforting. “That’s the guy’s whole thing, strike fear into the heart of mortals just ‘cuz it makes him laugh. Don’t think too hard on it. What happened next?”

“He said he didn’t want to lose a body so soon. Told me he’d be back some day, and then dad’s body fell and he was gone,” Rin sped through the rest of the story, and again, Shiro had that feeling that something was wrong. 

Of course Rin was lying, Shiro knew that. It was a good thing, too, he couldn’t just let Shura know that he was one of the sons of Satan, or he’d be slaughtered on the spot. Rin was covering for them, but something still felt off. 

He knew he would need to hear the truth, the actual truth from Rin himself. 

“That’s it?” Shura pressed, and at Rin’s nod, she sighed loudly. “God, what a shit show. Centuries of nothing, and then we get the Blue Night, then this shit. He’s starting something, and it drives me up the wall that we don’t know what the hell it is!”

“He’s certainly moving a lot faster than even I had anticipated,” Mephisto added, frowning. “I suppose it’s because Shiro is nearing the end of his life, he’ll need to move his plans along faster.”

“Nearing the- I’m only 51, you shit!”

“Ah, the short length of human life,” Mephisto sighed, and fanned himself dramatically. “I think I’ll almost miss you when you’re gone- in, what, two years? Three?”

Shiro rolled his eyes. “Oh, piss off. Anyways. Shura, is there anything else?”

“Nah, I’m good for now,” She said, shrugging before she looked at Yukio. “Don’tcha have some class to be at?”

Yukio adjusted his glasses, smile blatantly fake. “I’m surprised, Shura, I didn’t think responsibility was a concept you understood.”

“Eat my ass, you big chicken. Y'all are good to go. Except you, Rin, lemme see you for a sec.”

Both Shiro and Yukio tensed in turn, turning wary glances to Shura who was only looking directly at Rin. Shiro knew they couldn’t protest without raising suspicion, so with all the reluctance in the world, he filed out of his office after Mephisto. Yukio was much slower to follow, and Shiro could see it written across his face that he didn’t want to leave his brother alone with Shura- who, for all she trash talked Angel, was almost just as unorthodox. Yukio closed the door behind them, but the three of them simultaneously and silently agreed to stay and eavesdrop. 

“Listen, kid,” They heard Shura start, followed by the sounds of footsteps and the squeaking of a chair against the wood floor. “I’m gonna cut to the chase and say it, some of that was probably bullshit.”

Yukio’s heartbeat slammed into his ears. 

“I don’t know why ya lied, or what you lied about, but I know Shiro is probably in on that shit, and Yukio, too. Or maybe they just saw through it, I don’t know,” Shura sounded bored, which was Yukio’s only comfort. “Honestly, I don’t really care. I trust Shiro, and I trust that chicken, so I’m trustin' that whatever this is, it isn’t gonna come back to bite me in the ass later, yeah? If Yukio really is sneakin' around behind those old farts’ backs, then I say good on him. It’s about damn time he finally stops actin' like some happy-go-lucky follower.”

_Piss off, Shura._

“But you, however, are clearly the weak link here. Word of advice- get better at lyin', yeah? The PTSD look is good for you, gives you some leeway with lookin' like a nervous wreck, but not that much leeway. I went easy on you with the questions, but if people start gettin' suspicious, they’re gonna see the holes in yer story eventually. So get better at lyin', and get your story coordinated with whoever’s helpin' you cover up. That’s all I got, yer good to leave now.”

Mephisto disappeared in a puff of pink smoke, and Yukio and Shiro quickly made themselves scarce. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I am keeping Paku in this fic because fuck you that’s why LMAO, there needs to be more ladies! And I’m going to give her more plot importance as well.
> 
> Comments and criticisms are very appreciated!


	5. a fight, an exam, and a warning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry for all the craziness and missed deadlines, these past couple of weeks have been very busy. I’m mostly back on track for updates (though today’s update is coming very late in the day, for me) and hopefully things will be more back to normal now!
> 
> chapter warnings: character trauma, references to experimentation, violence, somewhat of a panic attack

Okumura was avoiding them. That, Ryuji knew for sure. 

He didn’t know why, or what the hell had happened. He didn’t think they’d done anything wrong- at least, nothing out of the ordinary. There was just one normal day of pestering Okumura into friendship like always, and then suddenly the guy was skipping lunches, hiding after classes and ignoring them in the hallways. Nobody was safe from his sudden moodiness. Shima was ignored, Konekomaru was brushed off, hell, even Godain had confessed to them that Okumura was back to one-word answers in all of their classes again. 

Ryuji certainly had tough enough skin to put up with the clipped words and blank stares, after weeks of goading it out of Okumura at the beginning of the year (he was still embarrassed, recalling what an ass he’d made of himself), but goddammit, he thought they were past this! They made progress, they came to an understanding, Ryuji had apologized and they were supposed to be friends now. 

Maybe he was just such a loner that he didn’t understand that, but like hell Ryuji was going to let this emo, loner shtick go on. 

It was difficult, trying to corner him. Okumura was entirely (worryingly) way too good at keeping himself hidden away from those he was trying to avoid. That, and throw in this gigantic campus, and there were literally millions of places that the guy could hide. With his freakish athleticism and ability to jump higher than most normal people should be able to? It was going to be damn near impossible to track him down and keep him in one place. So, what solution to pursue?

Thankfully, where Okumura was talented in hiding, Ryuji had patience- and smarts, as much as Okumura liked to deny it. If he couldn’t find the stupid monkey, he’d make the stupid monkey come to him. 

“What things does Rin like?” Okumura-sensei had asked, incredulously when Ryuji managed to track him down. He’d shifted the textbooks and suitcase in his hands, looking up at the sky as he pondered. “Hmm. He likes manga, I suppose. Not even good ones, he likes the awful ones with bad romance plots.”

Ryuji cringed. “Yeah, not happening. Anythin’ else?”

Okumura-sensei hummed as he thought, then his face brightened as he came to a realization. “Ah! Of course, he loves cooking. Good luck prying him out of a kitchen once he’s in there.”

“Right, yeah, I do remember that,” Ryuji agreed. 

“Why do you ask, are you planning something?” Okumura-sensei asked, shifting the books in his hands to push his glasses up. Ryuji had just barely caught him between class changes, they’d both have to leave in a minute or two. 

“Uh, actually,” Ryuji felt a little bad saying so, but he figured that if Okumura was in that bad of a mood, Okumura-sensei would already know. Even so, he couldn’t outright say that he was planning to interrogate his classmate. “I noticed the guy’s been in a slump for a few days, and I wanted to, uh, cheer ‘im up?”

“Oh, that sounds like a good idea,” Okumura-sensei smiled, but Ryuji was confused to see guilt written all over his sensei’s expression. “Be gentle with him, will you? The Vatican took his testimony on our father’s attack recently. So whatever you’re planning...”

Ryuji tensed as Okumura-sensei reached a hand out to squeeze his shoulder. As his grip tightened almost painfully, the guilt in his smile turned into thinly veiled aggression. 

“...don’t do anything stupid or bullheaded, yes?” Okumura-sensei asked, but his eyes were so threatening that Ryuji couldn’t do anything but nod as fast as he could and excuse himself. 

Goddamn, Okumura-sensei could be a scary dude. 

Okay, so, slightly new plan. He was originally just gonna trap the guy and force some answers out of him. That usually always worked (not), but with Okumura-sensei’s threat hanging over his head, he’d have to... improvise, a little bit. Something gentler, or whatever. He’d thought the guy was just being emo to be emo, but now things were different. 

Their paladin, the Okumura twin’s dad, and his possession by Satan was pretty common knowledge at this point. Word had gotten out weeks ago, when it first occurred, and of course it had spread like wildfire. People said that Okumura senior was the only one to see it, with Okumura-sensei away, and the paladin busy being, well, possessed. 

Ryuji was starting to think that maybe he hadn’t taken it as seriously as he should have. 

He knew that Okumura was hiding something, way back when, but he’d let himself forget about it because, well, Okumura seemed fine. Ugh, keyword there, dumbass, seemed fine, he thought to himself. Well, no point in getting pissed with himself over it. He still had a chance to help his friend out. 

And that started with Ukobach, the kitchen demo- spirit. 

“Um,” Now that he was actually in front of the spirit, he didn’t know what exactly to say. Ukobach certainly didn’t look impressed. “I dunno if you can understand me, but-“

Ukobach let out an unamused huff. 

Ryuji rolled his eyes, sighing. “Hey, leave me alone, I ain’t ever talked to a demon before. I’m just trying to help Okumura out- I’m guessin’ you noticed too?”

The demon huffed again, and nodded. 

“He’s avoidin’ all of us. People are gettin’ on his back about his dad, and he’s off bitchin’ by himself instead of talkin’ to his friends about it. I’m tryin’ to track him down, but he’s a slippery shit when he wants to be, so I need yer help.”

Ukobach nodded again, but Ryuji suddenly realized what he had said and scrambled to back track. 

“Uh, not like a contract or anything!” God, no, leave the contracts and deals to Kamiki. “Just- Just an agreement between two dudes tryin’ to help out a mutual friend, yeah?”

Ukobach raised an eyebrow, as if to say, _what do you want me to do?_ Considering Ryuji hadn’t been outright ignored, he figured that meant the kitchen spirit was on his side.

“Cool, all I need ya to do is-“

* * *

“You are a rude asshole and I hate you.”

“Four days, huh?” Ryuji mused, looking up from his book to see a very irate looking Okumura standing before him. “I figured it’d take a little longer.”

The classroom was empty after their last cram class period had ended, and Ryuji knew Okumura was finally going to talk to him after the last hour and a half of glaring. Okumura’s words echoed harshly in the barren room. “Really? Making Ukobach kick me outta the kitchen? What do you _want_ from me?”

“Don’t get so mad, Okumura. I’m not tryna antagonize you,” Ryuji closed the book and frowned, standing up from his seat before sitting down on the desk to look Okumura in the eyes. The guy was glaring at him, far too angry for this to just be about being kicked out of the kitchen. Something was up, and Ryuji was gonna find out. “You’re avoidin’ us again. We’re worried about you.”

“You shouldn’t be,” Okumura scowled. “I’m fine.”

Ryuji frowned. “You’re a bad liar.”

Okumura seized up, and before Ryuji could even process it, his irritation quickly turned to anger. “Fuck off! I don’t need another person on my back!”

“Chill out, okay? I’m not on your back, I’m your friend. I can tell yer upset about somethin’, I’m just tryin’ to help you out,” Ryuji tried to be calm, but Okumura was only getting angrier with every word he said. Shit, maybe he should’ve just left things alone. 

“I didn’t ask you too! Can’t you just leave me alone?!” Okumura’s fists were clenched tight, blue eyes ablaze. “All you ever do is pester and annoy me! You just keep sticking like a- like a tumor, and I hate it! I don’t want your friendship, I don’t want your stupid concern, I want you to leave me _alone!!_ ”

Ryuji could feel himself getting angry too. He just wanted to help Okumura, but the guy was being a total ass. He was being rude for no reason, and Ryuji had half a mind to let him have it, but he knew the truth. The guy was being a coward, trying to chase people off because he thought that was easier. And damn if that didn’t piss him off even more. 

A tumor, Okumura had called him. Well if he wanted to see tumor, then Ryuji would show him a goddamn tumor. 

He squared his shoulders, and looked Okumura in the eyes. “No.”

Okumura blinked, then scowled again. “No? What the hell do you mean, no? I’m telling you to get lost!”

“And I said no,” Ryuji retorted. “I told you we’re gonna be friends, and I meant that shit. Friends don’t ditch friends just because they have big meltdowns.”

“This isn’t a meltdown, you _ass_ , I’m telling you I don’t want you around! I want you to go _away_!” Okumura hissed. 

“Sucks,” Ryuji said, unimpressed. 

“Ugh!” Okumura turned away and threw his hands up with a frustrated growl. “Why are you so annoying?!”

Ryuji raised an eyebrow. “That the best you got?”

“Oh, I’m just getting started!” Okumura snarled, rounding on him with a dark glare. “You’re stuck up, you’re snotty, you’re a know-it-all, you’re a pest, you’re stubborn, you’re stupid and reckless and headstrong, you think you’re hot shit because you can memorize a couple lines, you act like a stand up teacher’s pet but you’re a bully and you’re incapable of getting along with anyone but your stupid Kyoto posse-“

Well, this was weird, but at least it seemed like it was working. 

“-you’re clingy in all the most annoying ways, you make everyone feel stupid because you’re so high and mighty!” Okumura sucked in a breath, but Ryuji could see the anger faltering. Just a bit more. “You’re annoying and a bother, I don’t know why you’re so obsessed with getting in my business! I don’t need you getting up in my shit! Not you, not Shura, not the priests, not Yukio, and not my d- not my dad!”

Okumura was breathless now, voice trembling and hands shaking. Ryuji waited, quiet. 

“Don’t you think this shit sucks enough,” Okumura said, eventually. Quietly. “Without everyone getting in my business every two seconds? I almost saw my dad die. I told the goddamn story. Can’t you just let me _breathe_?”

That was his cue to step in, he guessed. “You’re not tryin’ to breathe, Okumura, you’re tryin’ to run away. What are you hidin’ from?”

“What am I _not_ hiding from? Everywhere I go, there’s someone waiting for me to trip up!” Okumura seemed near to tears. 

“No one wants you to trip up. We’re waitin’ for you to reach out,” Ryuji corrected, and as Okumura’s head ducked down, he leaned his head down too, trying to meet his eyes. “Nothin’s wrong with bein’ hurt. Nobody’s gonna judge you for that.”

“I’m not _hurt_ , I’m _scared_ , you dumbass!” Oh shit, Okumura really was crying this time. “I don’t know what to do! Satan almost killed my dad and he’s coming for me next and I’m scared!”

“...oh,” Was the most intelligent thing he could manage to say. That was... a lot deeper than he thought this was going to go, but he dug himself into this hole, and he was going to pull his way out of it. “Why do ya-“

“Because he told me, dipshit,” Okumura spat, swiping angrily at the tears that fell down his cheeks. “He’s coming for me, and unlike you, I don’t want to drag everyone else down with me!”

“So ya make the decision for everyone?” God, he hated that mentality above all. “We’re classmates, Okumura. We’re friends. We’re in this fight together, it’s ain’t just you. If we wanna ditch you, that’s our choice, but if we wanna stick with you, that’s our choice too. Don’t try to go fight this by yourself.”

Okumura threw his hands up again. “Why? Why are you so dead set on this?”

“Why are you still confused?” Ryuji fired back. “I’m not ditching’ you, even if you want me to.”

“Even if it gets you killed? You’d die, just for me.”

He rolled his eyes. “No, not just for you, dumbass. For Koneko’s parents, and Shima’s brother, and everyone in my monastery who Satan killed. I’ve gotta personal bone to pick with that bastard, and I’ll find him even if you shut me out. If I’m dyin’, I’m dyin’ for them. And maybe also you.”

Okumura narrowed his eyes at him, but the look was severely undermined by his red rimmed eyes and blotchy face. “I hate you.”

“Now that, there,” Ryuji snorted. “That sounds like a whole lotta ‘I ain’t got nothin’ else to say, so I’m gonna insult you’. I’m takin’ it as a win.”

“You suck.”

“That the best you got?”

“You’re an ass.”

“Very inventive.”

“You’re a pretentious dickhead.”

“Ooh, pulled out the dictionary for that one.”

That managed to wrangle a little smile out of Okumura, and Ryuji counted it as a victory. “...thank you, I guess. Even though this was stupid. I’m sorry I was rude.”

“Oh no, save your apologies. We gotta couple more trips to make before you’re done.”

“Trip- what?!”

* * *

“I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“Acting like an asshole...”

“And?”

“Being rude to you guys. You didn’t deserve it.”

Konekomaru blinked, wide eyed and absolutely dumbfounded. He looked over at Shima next to him, but the pink haired boy looked equally as confused and slightly scared as he did. Bon was standing before them, arms crossed and expression stern as he looked down at Okumura. The older Okumura twin was scratching his head sheepishly, avoiding eye contact, but his posture was clearly guilty and apologetic. “...is this a joke?”

“No,” Okumura sighed. “I was in a funk, and I was rude to you guys, and you didn’t deserve it. Especially since you were being so nice.”

“O-Oh,” Konekomaru smiled, then, hesitant as he reached a hand out to pat Okumura’s shoulder. “It’s alright! People say and do things they don’t mean sometimes.”

“Okumura,” Shima whispered behind a hand conspiratorially. “Did Bon bully you into this?”

“Shima!”

“Excuse you?!”

Okumura snickered as both Konekomaru and Suguro smacked Shima upside the head. “No, the stupid ape just doesn’t know when to give up.”

“If that’s true, then you don’t know when to stop giving up,” Suguro retorted. “Maybe you could learn something from me.”

“What, like how to be a stuck up loser?” 

“Maybe more like how to be someone who actually stays awake in class.”

“Asshole.”

“Out of comebacks already?”

Konekomaru watched as they bickered, eyebrows slowly raising with each argument thrown between them. He looked over at Shima, again, but this time, the pink haired boy was much more distracted by the sudden entrance of Kamiki at the door. So, he was the only one seeing this, huh?

Oh well. Paku was back from being on sick leave, which hopefully meant that they could pick up the training camp again! Konekomaru left the three of them behind as he made his way to his seat, trading a smile with Paku as he passed by her. Shima followed soon after him, but his eyes were on the girls as per usual, much to Konekomaru’s disappointment. He rolled his eyes and pulled out his textbook for their class, where thankfully, Okumura-sensei was the teacher and quickly shut both Bon and Okumura up. 

“Now that everyone is _settled_ ,” Okumura-sensei said irritatedly, adjusting his glasses as both Bon and Okumura pouted like children in their seats. “I’m sure you’ve all seen, but we’re very happy to have Paku back and healthy. Since we’re back to full capacity, we’ll continue the training camp at the beginning of next week. You can return back to the same roommates you had last time, or switch things up, whatever you’d like to do. As per last time, as long as you show up for the courses...”

The rest of the class went about as normal as it usually did, nothing much out of the ordinary now that Paku was back and the training camp was set to continue. The first part of camp had been lucky for them, because it fell on a break from school, but now they'd be hard pressed for time since the camp would continue during the school week. Konekomaru sighed quietly to himself, and waved off Bon's concerned look. This lats part of the camp was sure to suck the most, huh? School work, and a final exam to ascend from page to exwire?

He didn't think things could get much worse than that.

* * *

This was worse.

This was much worse.

"What the hell happened to the lights!"

"Is that a naberius?!"

" _Will ya shut up and let me chant?!_ "

* * *

Shiro muffled a snicker behind his hand as he watched the Exwires scramble in the dark to fend off the lumbering naberius. It was hard as hell not to laugh when Shima threw himself on Miwa like the smaller monk was going to protect him, somehow. That Moriyama, though, she was a quick thinker with the wall of thorns she summoned up with her little greenman, and while the boys scrambled over each other like a box of roaches, Izumo was pulling her byakko up. Paku caught Shiemi as she faltered under the drain of her demon, and Shiro watched, impressed, as the girl scrawled runes over the floor with charcoal from her pocket.

Protective spells, huh? What an accomplished exwire she was going to be!

Shiro leaned back from the panel of wood the other teachers had set up to cleverly watch, chuckling to himself as Neuhaus looked over his naberius carefully. He had a good feeling about this batch of pages. Now that Suguro and Rin had come to somewhat of an understanding, this would be a perfect chance for them to figure out how to work together as a group, as well as for them to see how capable they were as exwire candidates.

But as much as he would have loved to stay and observe the testing, as Paladin, he had many other things to do.

One of which, had to do with the blonde exorcist before him.

"Mr. Fujimoto!" Angel looked almost painfully stiff, standing at attention before him. "I've been requested to escort you to Mr. Dragulesc!"

Shiro groaned aloud, leaning his head back and glaring at the ceiling. As if Angel and his endearing but near embarrassing formality wasn't enough, now he had to go see that whackjob Dragulesc. He'd almost like Angel, but the kid was too eager to follow orders and never seemed to question a damn thing he was told to do, out of blind loyalty and faith that Shiro had neither the heart nor the time to question. The Grigori probably knew he'd run off if he were left to report to Dragulesc by himself, so of course they sicced their loyal little hound Angel on him to make sure he actually showed up. Dammit.

"Alright, fine," He sighed, looking back down at Angel, who looked supremely uncomfortable. "Let's go, then. Get this over with."

Angel nodded sharply, and Shiro followed him to one of the doors in the second floor not currently in use. "...I'm sorry to have to force you along, Mr. Fujimoto."

"Don't worry about it, kid, I've been dodging phys exams like these for longer than you've been alive," The transition from old, rotting dorms to the alcohol-drenched, stark white walls of Dragulesc's public labs sent a shiver down his spine, and he didn't try to hide the scowl his expression fell into. He didn't care if it offended Dragulesc, he had never liked the man and he wasn't about to start now. "Though I got a feeling this one's going to suck a hell of a lot more."

"Well, that does tend to happen when one is the only person alive to survive a possession by Satan himself- not only once, but twice," Dragulesc called from where he stood next to an examination table, face eerily blank. Shiro could feel Angel's shocked and confused gaze at the back of his head, but hey, if the kid wanted to be a paladin so bad, it was about damn time he saw the nastier parts of the Order. "You're lucky I don't put you under the knife again. An ability like that is remarkable."

"You pull out knives, I pull out guns. Fair trade, I think," Shiro leveled him with a glare, one that Dragulesc scoffed at. "Just get this shit done and over with."

"As soon as your little protege is on his way."

Shiro pulled himself up onto the table, ignoring the dozens of interns and other doctors that swarmed about the small room. "Nah, I think he can stay. He wants to be a paladin, you know. I figure it's about time for him to start learning the ropes."

Angel flushed a bit at that, but Dragulesc was busy giving Shiro a dirty look, one which he refused to falter under. The freak doctor was less likely to bring up his little experiments when other exorcists were in the room, something that he was counting on.

"Fine," He said. "But I expect him not to be a bother."

"Of course not! I'll stay out of your way," Angel rushed to say, before quickly standing at the corner of the room. Shiro almost could have laughed at how the kid managed to look torn between keeping up his 'holier than thou' look while also trying to stay out of other people's way.

"Hmm," Dragulesc rolled his eyes, before looking back to Shiro. "Shirt."

"Huh, I guess the word 'please' doesn't count as medical terminology," He snarked, but set his coat aside, and pulled his shirt up and off. He was more than used to this part of the exam, at least. Thankfully, Dragulesc didn't say anything more as he went through temperature, pulse, eyes and ears, heartbeat and all other sorts of general check up procedures. His blood was drawn at one point, reflexes checked, skin examined, all things that he had plenty of patience to execute but hardly any to endure. With Dragulesc here, it was almost like he'd been thrown back into Section 13. At least the freak doctor couldn't talk about it any more than Shiro could.

"Well, you’re in passable enough health," Dragulesc said, eventually.

"Great, is that it? Can I leave now?" Shiro asked impatiently.

"So eager to leave?" Dragulesc raised an eyebrow, to which Shiro gave him a pointed look. "There's still more we have to discuss. Why was no one informed of this supposed ability of Satan to speak to you?"

Shiro scowled. Damn, when had Shura turned into such a traitor? “I'm sure you've seen it in other subjects. I'm the best shot he's got at getting up to Assiah, of course he's been dogging after me for decades. It was never anything more than a pathetic attempt at tearing me down, so I didn't think it mattered."

"You, having the ability to converse with the king of all demons?" Dragulesc looked incredulous, as if what Shiro was saying was so stupid he couldn't even believe it. "You didn't think that would be pertinent to inform someone of? If the Grigori weren't so confident in believing you to be a leashed dog, that would be seen as treason, no less."

"Treason? You think I'd work with that bastard? Don't insult me," Shiro snapped. "If it were a two way street, I'd tell the demon to eat shit and die."

Dragulesc looked at him disdainfully. "So crude. It's a wonder they let you out at all."

"You wanna try forcing me back in, you skinny twig?"

"I'd give anything in the world to get you strapped on a table again, but sadly, life doesn't work according to the plan one beats out of it," Dragulesc retorted, and Shiro decided then that if given the chance, he wouldn't hesitate to throw the man off the nearest cliff. "You can leave."

Shiro bit down the myriad of curses that threatened to leave his mouth, too focused on getting out of there and getting out of there as fast as possible. He buttoned his jacket up and pushed past the throng of interns that had gathered to eagerly watch him. He couldn't find it in himself to feel bad about the way they yelped and scrambled out of his way. They were the exact type of freaks who looked at him like he was just some rat to be dissected back at Section 13, and he didn't want to be around them or their monster of a leader any more than he had to.

"Oh, and Fujimoto?" Dragulesc called as he left. "Those boys you adopted there, it's a little funny how similar they look to you, is it not?"

Even as his blood ran cold, Shiro refused to turn around and let the man know how much that statement had shaken him.

Angel was uncharacteristically silent when they went back out the door portal they'd come through, this time in one of the international hallways where Angel could go back to whatever he was doing before. He could feel the younger exorcist staring at the back of his head as they walked down the hallways towards the central collection of doorways. Even so, Shiro was too focused on calming his racing heart to wring the questions Angel wanted to ask out of him like he usually did. If the man wanted to ask something, he'd have to vocalize it himself.

And vocalize it, he did. "Mr. Fujimoto? I apologize if this is forward of me, but can I ask what Mr. Dragulesc meant about the knife and ta-"

"No, you cannot ask," He said harshly. After a minute, he stopped, sighed, and turned back to look at Angel, who looked embarrassed that he had opened his mouth at all. "Even if I wanted to answer your question, I can't, kid. When you become the paladin after me, you'll learn then.”

Angel looked surprised. “You really have faith in me, in becoming the next paladin?"

Shiro waved a hand, turning around to continue walking towards the door that would take him back to True Cross. "Of course. There's nothing the Grigori like more than an eager dog who follows orders well. It's why they can't stand me."

"That's... kind of a backhanded compliment..."

But Shiro was already pulling the door opened, and couldn't really care less about fixing Angel's apparently hurt feelings. He shut the door behind him, and looked out at the empty classroom he had stepped into.

And then the ball dropped.

The panic he'd narrowly been concealing came back with a vengeance, and Shiro's heart leapt up into his throat as he stumbled over to a desk and leaned against it. Shit. Shit. Shit, shit, _shit_. Dragulesc knew. Of all of the people who could possibly ferret him out, it had to be that sadistic whackjob _freak_ of a doctor. He knew it was bound to happen eventually. Rin was just too hot headed, too head strong. He just knew his eldest son was going to reveal himself eventually, but as far as he knew, there hadn't even been a blow up! How did Dragulesc even find out?

God above, if the Grigori found out, he'd be executed on the spot, no questions asked. Rin and Yukio wouldn't be so lucky.

His only comfort was that there were no exorcists currently banging down the doors to put a gun to his head, and the exwire exam was going by perfectly smoothly when he'd left. It was a lot to assume, but it was possible that Dragulesc hadn't told anyone. He wouldn't be surprised, if the man kept something like that a secret just so he could see how things would play out.

As despicable as it was, Shiro was depending on that. As long as Dragulesc kept the information to himself, his boys were safe, and Shiro could drag him down to hell with him if he decided to speak up. The Grigori wouldn't spare an accomplice in something like this, whether or not Dragulesc was working with him.

They were safe, for now, but not for very much longer.

* * *

Yukio was less than three seconds from calling the exam to a halt and jumping down to strangle his brother himself.

Rin, the absolute idiot that he was, had decided that it would be a perfectly smart and heroic idea to lure one of the naberius halves away from the rest of the pages and deeper into the abandoned dorms. This was a great idea, and all, except Rin had somehow forgotten something. He had no weapons, didn't know the demon's banishing scripture, and any attempts to attack it physically made the beast let out toxic ooze that would have infected him if he weren't half demon himself. As it was, Yukio was banging his head against his clipboard as silently as he could, ignoring Neuhaus' bored but somewhat curious glance his way.

"My brother is an idiot," He said, simply, and Neuhaus nodded.

Rin was so lucky that it was only Yukio and Neuhaus in this section of the dorm's observing areas. Even as it was, any flame up and Neuhaus would know their secret and everything would go straight to hell. Maybe he was being paranoid, but now the beast had his brother backed into a corner and Yukio could say with absolutely zero certainty that a flare up _wasn't_ shortly on it's way.

"Maybe we should stop this," He turned to Neuhaus, trying to hide his nervousness. "He clearly has no way to fight back, and no way to make it out. He's trapped without his teammates, too. We should stop this and just have him take the test again next cycle."

But the other teacher wasn't looking at him. No, Neuhaus was staring down at the battle as Rin pulled a chair up to protect himself from the naberius' blow, and Yukio felt a strange wave of foreboding wash over him.

"Mr. Neuhaus?" He leaned down to try to look the man in the eyes, but his stomach dropped as he saw the look in Neuhaus' eyes. Cold. Detached. Hateful. "I said we should stop the exam. Please call your summon back."

"Just give him a few more moments," Neuhaus was talking like Yukio wasn't even there. "We'll wring it out of him."

Yukio could have thrown up with how hard his stomach dropped. His head snapped back to look at Rin. The demon had him by the hair, it looked like it was _speaking_ to him. Rin looked beyond terrified. The last time Rin had looked that scared, the last fight against a Naberius, he'd been able to communicate with the demon.

Yukio would not allow Neuhaus to incriminate Rin like that again.

The barrel of his gun flashed in the low light. That was when Neuhaus turned to him, shocked, then angry, and reached for his gun. Yukio fired two shots faster than the older man could stop him- one to shatter the one-way glass, the other through the heart of the Naberius. Rin was dropped to the floor, and the naberius collapsed in a billowing puff of black smoke that burned his nostrils as Yukio jumped down. He dropped his gun and fell to his knees next to his brother. He pulled Rin up to sitting, one hand on his back and the other clutching Rin's own as his twin's chest heaved with breaths coming in too quickly.

"Breathe, Rin, breathe," Yukio was distressed to see that his brother didn't even seem to see him there, eyes glued to where the naberius had fallen. "You're safe. This was just a test. The naberius is dead, the test is over. You're _safe_."

Rin's grip was crushing his hand, but Yukio just grit his teeth and forced himself to endure it. He held his brother close as he calmed down, only looking up from him when he heard footsteps against the wood of the room. He looked up to see Neuhaus, looking rather put out as he frowned at the two brothers. Yukio could've grabbed his gun and put another bullet through someone's chest, and as it was, he only barely kept himself back from snarling at the man.

"That was against the guidelines of the exam, Mr. Neuhaus. There are clear rules about excessive force and when to stop an attack, which you blatantly ignored!"

Neuhaus scoffed. "Control yourself, Okumura. Those may have been your instructions, but I was acting within the guidelines of my own.

He tensed, eyes widening. "What?"

"Mephisto," Neuhaus said, simply, turning a disdainful glare towards Rin. "He wants to see how far the little monster can be pushed."

Mephisto? What did that mean? Wasn't Mephisto supposed to be on their side? If not their's, then Shiro's, surely!

Why was he trying to expose Rin?

Before Yukio could wrangle an answer out of Neuhaus, the man was leaving the room, and he couldn't chase after Neuhaus without leaving his brother alone. He ground his teeth together, frustrated and irritated, but he had more to worry about now. He looked down at his brother, the irritation melting away to concern, but Rin was staring at Neuhaus' back, eyebrows furrowed and eyes wide.

"Does he know?" Rin's voice was hardly louder than a whisper.

Yukio breathed out a sigh. "It's possible. He said that Mephisto put him up to this, but I don't know what he wants to test you for that he can't just ask you about. You haven't even drawn the sword yet."

Rin tensed. Yukio froze.

"You... haven't drawn the sword yet, right?"

Before Rin could speak or Yukio could think further about it, footsteps interrupted them, quickly followed by the door opening as Shiro stepped in. Yukio hated the grim look on his face as the man stopped and crouched down to squat next to them.

"Yukio, where are your co-proctors?"

Yukio's stomach fell again at the pointed words. "I-I'm the only one in here. Neuhaus just left."

"Good," Shiro shifted to sit down fully, and leaned in close to the two of them. "The other proctors are with the students, I don't think we'll be interrupted."

"We have a problem," He said, reluctant.

"Make that two," Shiro groaned, rubbing at the back of his neck. "Dragulesc, that crack headed arc knight, might be onto you two's true parentage."

Yukio almost didn't even want to tell him their side, after that. "Neuhaus might know, too. He was trying to force Rin to expose himself in the fight with the naberius, I had to kill it to get him to stop. He says- he says he was acting on Mephisto's orders."

Shiro's face visibly fell, and somehow that made everything worse. Their dad always seemed to know what to do, how to handle these situations, but things were falling apart faster than he could stop them. If even Shiro couldn't keep up, what chance did they have?

"You're sure he said that?" Shiro asked, quiet, like he didn't want to hear Yukio's answer. "Mephisto is behind this?"

"I'm sure that's what Neuhaus said."

"Shit."

Yukio watched their father stand up, and any other time, he would have laughed at the sound of Shiro's knees popping. But Shiro's face was shuttered, and his voice tight.

"I'll talk to him."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and criticisms are always appreciated!!!


	6. a compromise, a training room, and a hug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I’m trying to keep to my updating schedule, even though this chapter comes pretty late today lol! I hope you all enjoy!
> 
> chapter warnings: discussion of PTSD, character trauma

"Just what the _hell_ do you think you're doing?"

Mephisto turned a fanged grin up at Shiro as he slammed the door to his gaudy office closed, but that only served to piss him off more. "What _ever_ could you be talking about, my dear friend?"

"Don't play dumb, you ass," It was only respect for Mephisto as a demon who could tear him into pieces without hesitation that kept Shiro from grabbing Mephisto by his tacky scarf. Even as it was, his arms twitched near violently when he crossed them over his chest. By targeting his boys, Mephisto had made things very, _very_ personal. "Neuhaus, and the exwire exam? If Rin revealed himself in front of the students, they would've killed him on the spot!"

"Oh, please, Shiro, I had everything quite under control," Mephisto waved his hand flippantly, unconcerned. "Everything was going according to plan."

Shiro's eye twitched. "I know you like to think humans are just some toys-"

"Because that's what you are," Mephisto interrupted pointedly, smiling. "Your pathetically short human lives aren't good for anything other than acting as pieces in a puzzle that you don't even have the comprehension of being able to see, you silly boy. But if it's any comfort to you, my plan requires both you and your adopted children alive."

"'Alive' is a very loose term," Shiro snapped. He knew that better than anyone.

Mephisto's smile widened. "True! You've grown to be so smart, my friend! Yes, I require them alive, but to _what_ degree, exactly, is negotiable."

"You'd better start making it non-negotiable, Pheles," Shiro leaned down, and he knew he was gambling with his life here, but for Rin and Yukio? Worth it, no questions asked.

"Oh, you're threatening me?" Mephisto laughed, leaning back in his chair. "Always the spitfire, that is what I like most about you! How about this- since you're so precocious, I'll make a another wager with you, yes? From this day onwards, I will no longer attempt to force young Rin to awaken his power. If he reveals himself as the Son of Satan in front of the Vatican before his exam to become an exorcist, then I will step in, save the poor boy, and be allowed to carry out my plan as I please."

Shiro frowned. "And if he doesn't?"

"Well, then, you get what you want!" Mephisto splayed his hands out with a threatening grin. "I swear on my life that I will no longer interfere with the Okumura boys. If they chose to take up the fight against our father, it will be by their own choice, completely untainted by myself. Deal?"

Shiro looked at Mephisto's outstretched hand, and hesitated. This was suspicious. Mephisto would never give up his pieces in a game unless he was sure he could get them back, or they would be unneeded for however long he lost them. This deal rubbed him all the wrong ways- common sense told him not to take it. But the chance that Mephisto would be locked out of the game, and his boys could live free on their own? Without an overbearing demon king pushing them along from behind the curtain? How could he give that up?

Besides, he had kept Rin from revealing himself for almost sixteen years. He could keep doing that.

Right?

He would have to. He grabbed Mephisto's hand, fighting back a grimace at the demon's tight grip. "Fine. Deal."

Mephisto's fanged grin glinted. "Good. Now, I do believe we have somewhere to be?"

* * *

"CONGRATULATIONS ON BECOMING EXWIRES, MY YOUNG STUDENTS~!!"

"AAAH!"

"Where the hell did you come from?!"

* * *

"Hey, Shiro's brat!"

Shura grinned as she caught her little target just as he was exiting their last cram class of the day, flanked by some tall punk-looking kid and two others. Okumura looked up at her from across the courtyard, and the look of apprehension and dread on his face was enough to make her grin widen. She crossed the courtyard quickly enough and grabbed the kid by the collar, pulling him into an aggressive one-armed hug. "Been a while, huh? How ya been, how ya doing?"

"Uh," The way he squirmed and gave her a weird look reminded her so much of a younger version of that chicken. It made sense, they were twins, after all. "My dad's not around, if you're looking for him. Or Yukio."

"Good! I'm gettin' tired of seeing that four-eyed mole face around here anyways," Shura said, waving her free hand as she started dragging Okumura along, ignoring both his protests and the rooster-haired boy angrily shouting after her. "I'm here for you, kiddo. Yer little exwire test was invalidated thanks to Neuhaus, so Shiro sicced me on ya as a favor. Yer lucky day, huh?"

Okumura scowled and managed to worm out of her hold, but he still followed her, which was all she cared about. "Sure?"

"Aw, don't be so mean," Shura pouted, crossing her arms. "I'm a great teacher, and a hot one, too! Yer lucky I made time in my busy schedule for you, you should thank yer old man."

She didn't miss the uncomfortable look that briefly crossed his face. He didn't reply.

"So serious!" Shura couldn't help but laugh. What was it with teenagers and being so intense all the time? "Show a little gratitude, sprat, I'm the best swordhand on this side of the hemisphere! Besides maybe that baldy, Angel. If I like what I see, maybe I'll consider taking you under my wing, eh? Shiro certainly won't stop askin' me to."

"Swordhand?" Okumura echoed, his eyebrows furrowing. "You do know I don't have a weapon, right?"

Shura spluttered, whirling around to face him. "Ya- what? Seriously?! They let ya take that test with, what, nothing? Jack shit? Jesus, kid! No wonder that naberius cornered ya so fast!"

"It's not my fault!" The kid huffed defensively. "I didn't even know this demon shit existed until like, a few weeks ago! It's not like I had time to bust my ass with a weapon like everyone else."

"Whaddya mean, didn't even know it existed?!" Just what the hell was Shiro thinking, throwing him into this so last minute? "Do you even realize how disturbin’ it is, how little you know? I don't even know how they let ya into this program, everyone's got at least _something_ skill-wise when they take that exam!"

"W-Well, Paku doesn't have any weapons, either! And Suguro just uses Shima's weapon anyways!"

"I have no idea who those people are, and I don't really care," She pointed out, turning around to continue their way over to True Cross' gym. If she remembered right, there should be a subsection under the public gym where the Exorcists' gymnasium was located. 

Oh well, even if she couldn't find it, she would just find Yukio and harass him until he showed her where it was. "Well, it could be worse. Shiro tells me yer pretty strong, and a hell of a brawler."

"I-" Okumura sounded thoroughly embarrassed now. "I'm... not really good at keeping out of fights."

"Let's just hope that means somethin' on the field.”

Shura pushed open the doors to the public gym and followed the walls to a side door, where an access key that Shiro had given her opened up the stair well down to the gymnasium. Ah, shit, she recognized this now! This was where she and Yukio beat the tar out of each other at that ball-shooting-machine. Now that she remembered it, Yukio totally still owed her after her win the last time! Man, she could think of a dozen different restaurants to drag him to, but only the most expensive ones would do, of course! No meal was better than one that broke someone else's wallet besides her own. If Yukio didn't want to pay, he shouldn't have played!

"How do you and Yukio know each other? And dad?"

The question caught her off guard, and she turned to see Okumura standing with his hands in his pockets. His posture was anything but relaxed. His expression was shuttered, but he wasn't so good that Shura couldn't tell that for some reason, her relationship with the kid's family made him insecure. And upset, too. Damn, she hoped he wouldn't cry or anything. Crying kids were annoying.

"...you sure ya wanna ask that now?" Shura asked, raising an eyebrow. There was a rack of practice weapons to the side, and she grabbed two wooden katanas, throwing one to Okumura. "We're about to be kinda busy, you know. All you gotta do is show me some basic ability to defend yerrself, that'll be good for me to pass ya. And if I see somethin’ I like, I'll keep teachin’ ya."

Okumura managed to catch the katana, but almost dropped it, before turning a frown up at her. "I can do both!"

"Ha!" She snorted. "Fine, I'll cut you a deal. Ya land a hit, I'll answer a question. How's that sound?"

"Like you're settin' me up to not get any answers."

She grinned, and stepped closer to him to show him how to properly hold the katana, and kicked his feet into a wider stance until she was satisfied. "Please, I'll go easy on ya. Keep yourself balanced, ability ain't gonna mean shit if your enemy can blow right past your bad posture."

Shura looked over his fighting form, her grin fading away to a more serious expression. There were times for jokes, and there were times for focusing, and when it came to teaching sword fighting, that was the time to focus. Nothing was gonna get this kid killed faster than misled confidence built on a crumbling foundation. She slapped the katana against his back until he stood up straight, and when that looked proper enough, she took her own stance up a few feet away from him, adjusting to the weight of the wooden weapon.

"Alright, now hit me."

Okumura looked at her warily, but before she could even appreciate that he was actually thinking about his next move, he lunged forward and threw the katana forward in a large arc that made her roll her eyes. She brought her own katana up to meet his blow, tilting her wrist to let his blade slide off of hers before twisting her own blade through the opening she made. He grunted as the wood slapped his ribs, and Shura leaned back.

"Ugh, and you were doing so good at first!" She groaned, rubbing at her eyes. "Listen, kid, I don't know why Shiro wants ya to learn the katana so bad, but here's one thing to internalize. This blade? It's thin as shit compared to others, so you can't go swingin' it around like a club or you'll break it. The katana's not for cleaving, its for quick cuts and slices and shit. Yer best bet is to shrug off the blow and swing it around fast as ya can, got it? Try again."

She took her stance again, and so did he, and then they sparred again. This time really wasn't much more of an improvement over the last round. Okumura managed to get past the first hit, she gave him credit for that, but his swings were so broad that it was just too easy to sweep in and get to his abdomen. He'd probably be a battleground of bruises tomorrow, but, eh. That was how she learned, and having a physical reminder of mistakes sure made things stick.

"Man, you really suck at this," Shura said, mostly to herself, after a particularly hard hit had him nursing his fingers. "Katana sword fighting is a more subtle, quick art. Are ya sure this is what you wanna do?"

"I've been doing this for like, fifteen minutes!" He snarked, wiping his bangs out of his eyes. "I'm not giving up yet, I'll get a hit on you for sure!"

"Excuse you?" That startled a laugh out of her. "Ya better be ready to back that up, brat!"

She didn't hold back anything in their next round, pressing Okumura hard on the defensive. She took a little vindictive glee out of the poor kid stumbling backwards, barely able to keep up with her speed. Hey, if he was gonna go mouthing off, he better be ready to deal with the consequences. She didn't cut any corners when it came to training new kids, and after she sent his katana flying for the third time in a row, it seemed like he was finally getting that.

She couldn't help but tease him. "Aw, c'mon, kid, what was that about getting a hit on me?"

"Well, that was before you went all sword demon on me!" He whined, and reluctantly picked the katana back up.

"Can't handle the heat, huh? I'm barely even pushing ya here," She said, grinning. "I'm an upper first class exorcist, this is me going easy!"

"Seriously?!"

Shura laughed at that, but when they tried again, she eased up a little. He had a bit of a point, really. Her job here was really just to assess whether or not he was exwire material, and see if she would be his tutor for the upcoming exorcist exams. Plus, she'd already made her point.

Okumura, however, was fighting like a fire had been lit up under his ass. Damn, if she had known that showing off would make him more serious, she would've done that forever ago! Though being a spitfire wasn't enough to make up for sheer lack of experience, he was actually pushing himself now. When she knocked Okumura flat on his ass once again, he didn't hesitate to get back up again and throw himself back into it, and Shura couldn't help but be somewhat impressed. If nothing else, he was driven as hell when he could be pushed to care about something, and this seemed to be one of those rare things.

To her surprise, she shared in his excitement when he managed to hit her arm with the wooden blade. Even though it was mostly a fluke (he'd tripped on his own shoe, and his blade slid forward faster than she had anticipated), it was a hit, she had to give that to him.

"Alright," She set the tip of the katana against the ground and leaned against it, smiling lazily at a still-excited Okumura. "A hit's a hit. What's yer first question?"

"Oh! Uh," He looked like he had forgotten about that altogether. "How do you know dad and Yukio?"

"Ain't that two questions?"

"It is not!"

"Is too! That's two different people," She countered. "Pick one."

He huffed, "Fine. Uh... you and dad."

"Hmm," That was a complicated one. "Well, basically put, I was a shitty little demon child, and Shiro was called in to chill me out."

"Huh?!" Okumura cried. "That's so vague!"

"There's not much to it other than that! What, you want me to say he saved me from a life of crime and now I'm forever indebted to him?" Sensing a chance to tease the kid, she kept on. "Or maybe about how utterly in love with him I was when I first saw him? You know, he used to be pretty handsome when he was younger! Still is, really, I wouldn't mind getting some of-"

"Shut up! Stop! I don't wanna hear it!" Okumura shouted, face bright red as he dropped the katana to clap his hands over his ears. "I regret asking!"

Shura cackled. "Maybe don't ask, then! Ain'tcha ever heard the saying, don't look a gift horse in the mouth?"

"Ugh, can we go back to fighting now?"

"Nah, I think we're good for today," She said, hefting the wooden katana up over her shoulder. "It's already almost 8, you know."

Okumura blinked, face blank. "So?"

"Don't ya gotta get home?" She asked pointedly, leaning forward. "Y'know, to your monastery? Shiro's about half a step away from a heart attack these days anyway, don't do him like that."

"Oh."

Oh? What kind of an answer was that? 

Shura narrowed her eyes and leaned down further, trying to look him in the eyes even as he turned away to pick the katana up. He avoided looking at her as he put it up on the rack and grabbed the backpack he'd dropped on the floor when they first came in. Before he could make it out of the gym, Shura stepped forward and tossed a leg up to the wall beside his knee, catching him before he could go any further. It didn't help much that they were the same height, but the guy looked skittish enough already. All his bravado from before was gone, and that was suspicious.

"Alright, now's the time to show me how much better ya got at lyin'," She put her free hand on her hip, frowning at him. "Yer avoidin' home still, ain'tcha?"

He looked up at her, startled. "Still?"

"Yeah, Shiro told me how yer shirkin' comin' home. He's tryin' not to press ya, 'specially after he said ya snapped at him a while back."

"...thought he forgot about that."

"Well, he didn't, so sucks for you. So, lay it on me. I'll even promise to wait a bit before tellin' Shiro, if yer excuse is good enough." He looked at her leg, then the katana warily, and she recognized the look of someone about to run away. "Ah, don't try it. You forget the upper first class exorcist bit? Ya wouldn't get far."

"Why do you care anyways?" He snipped, crossing his arms defensively. "It's not your business."

"Uh huh. I don't really care. I'm doin' you and yer old man a favor by coverin' for yer asses with yer shitty story about yer dad gettin' possessed, so the least you can do is satsify my curiosity a bit, yeah?"

He scowled. "It's not even a big deal! I just, don't like being at home. That's all."

"Why?" Shura pushed.

"That's a stupid question!" He looked extremely uncomfortable, and Shura almost felt bad for pressing him. Almost. "It's like every time I'm there, I can still see the blood all over the floor! And I can't even sleep without thinking every creak is that- is _him_ laughing!"

Shura's eyes widened. "...wait, like, for real, PTSD?"

"I don't know! You're the adult, shouldn't _you_ know?!" Okumura snapped, ducking under her leg while she was still shocked and pushing through the doors. His footsteps echoed harshly up the stairwell.

She followed after him, tossing the wood katana somewhere behind her. "I was jokin' when I said it back then! But that's real shit, kid, Shiro thinks yer just avoidin' him because yer still mad about him and Yukio hidin' shit from ya yer entire life!"

Okumura visibly tensed at that, his expression dark when he looked back at her. "Can you fuck off? Please?"

"Hey, hey, easy, sprat," Looks like she'd hit a nerve with that- she tucked that information away for later. "Not tryin' to antagonize ya, just tryin' to figure out yer angle."

"Yeah, well, you found it out! Happy?"

"Sure," She said, fighting down a snicker that definitely would only have pissed him off more. She followed him out of the gym and down the hallway as he tried to track down a door for his monastery key, one that Shura had a copy of on her own key ring. "Y'know, you should talk to yer old man about that. He just wants to help ya."

"I'll think about it," Okumura muttered. He found a door a few hallways down and put the key in, opening the door to the familiar golden glow of the monastery. "Are you seriously following me?"

"Yup! Gotta tell yer dad ya got a good case of shell shock," She chirped.

He glared at her and pushed through the door, apparently tired enough of her bullshit that he stormed straight off to his bedroom. She watched him leave, amused, as Shiro leaned his head out of his office to see his son. He sighed, and turned a tired look towards Shura.

"Antagonizing him again?" He asked.

"Ah, so you were eavesdropping last time!" She cried, entirely smug that she had been correct. She would bet money that Yukio had been spying too, and that nut Mephisto always seemed to know everything anyways.

Shura made her way into his office and closed the door behind her as Shiro went to go sit back down at his desk, pulling some mission reports over from a pile. She leaned over his desk to peer at them, ignoring the way Shiro rolled his eyes and sighed. 

"'s that more reports on Amaimon's kin?" She asked, curious.

"Yes, they're still heading closer to the academy," He grimaced, setting a few of them aside. "Amaimon's getting closer now, though for what reason, I have no idea."

"Are we really ready to handle that guy?"

That made him snort. "Amaimon? He's still one of the weakest on the roster, I could handle him easily by myself. The problem is that we don't know when he's coming, or for what. He's leaving a warpath, but no one's seen the king himself."

"He might be comin' for ya," Shura said, innocently. "Or yer kid. Didn't he say Satan might be dogging after Rin's body, next? Honestly, I dunno how much I believe that. His body is strong, physically, but he's not even anywhere near even my level."

"Right.” 

Shiro was looking down at the papers again, but Shura was surprised that he wasn't elaborating any on what he'd said. She was just an exorcist, yeah, she wasn't entitled to know things any more than any one else, but Shiro had always been open with her. Was there something he just couldn't disclose? It wouldn't be the first time, but damn, if it didn't rub her the wrong way.

She opened her mouth after a minute or two of quiet. "Talked to that brat of yers today." He looked up then, waiting for her to continue. "I'm gonna pass him. He can hold his own well enough, and if ya get a real blade for him, that's enough to get him to exwire status. The only problem with his initial results was the fighting ability, 'course. They told me his teamwork was passable enough."

"I'm guessing that isn't the only thing, though."

"Nope," She sighed, stretching her arms up above her. "Yer right about him still bein' pissy and all, about you 'n the chicken. I told him about how you and I met."

Shiro set the papers down to rub at his eyes under his glasses, groaning. "Shura-"

"Hey, don't get mad at me! He's the one who asked. I told him if he managed to get a hit on me, I'd answer his question, and he did! Besides, ya got a bigger problem than that," She huffed, her playful mood starting to fade.

"Which would be?"

"Rin's got PTSD," She said, and though Shiro had told her that he suspected so, his shoulders still seemed to sag a bit when she said it aloud. "And the monastery is tied into it. It's a trigger for him, that's why he's avoidin' it."

"...shit."

"Is the exwire program really where he needs to be right now?" Shura frowned, crossing her arms. "I'm sure they told ya the same thing they told me. He froze up with that naberius, can he really be an exorcist if he's that spooked all the time?"

"This might be the only way he can overcome it," Shiro countered, his hands shifting up to rub at his temples. "Whether I like it or not, he knows about demons now. Yukio was the same way- the kid was scared of his own shadow, the only way he got over it was when he learned to defend himself. Rin might be the same way."

Shura had to concede that. "Mmh, maybe. But it could just as easily backfire, if he keeps gettin' thrown into situations he can't get his way out of."

"Then we'll treat him the same way we'd treat any other upcoming exwire. Easy fights, lots of training. Build up his confidence in his skills, and he'll get over his fears soon enough," Shiro said, but to her, it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself than her.

"Ya think he'll start tellin' the truth, then? Because like ya heard me say, I know he's lyin' about what happened that night. And I know you are too," She held her ground when Shiro looked up at her, but the look of wariness on his face admittedly hurt a bit. "C'mon, Shiro, I'm on yer side, ya know that, right? I owe my whole life to you. Don'tcha trust me anymore?"

Shiro's eyes widened a bit, and Shura tried to fight back the hurt that was starting to get a bit stronger now. She was 26, she wasn't some sniveling teenager to be comforted, but Shiro was... he was everything to her. He was the only thing like family that she had. She never had parents around, didn't even know who they were or what they were like beyond Tatsuko, but Shiro was like a father to her. She always knew he cared about her, in his own way.

And now she was starting to wonder if maybe she'd overestimated her importance.

As if sensing this, Shiro stood from his desk and crossed it, coming to stand in front of her. She didn't resist when he pulled her into a tight hug, the scent of gunpowder and dust heavy on his coat.

"Of course I trust you," His voice vibrated deep in his chest, and for a second, Shura let herself relax into the hold. Things were starting to pull together into a picture that was quickly turning ugly, and she didn't know if she'd ever be able to enjoy this the same again. "This is just... a complicated situation. And I can't endanger you by dragging you into it. It's too late for me, and my boys, but trust me when I say that I'm protecting you."

When Shura pulled away form his chest, foreboding settled heavy into her stomach. "Shiro... what have you done?"

Shiro looked away from her, and even though his mouth was smiling, it didn't reach his eyes. To her, it looked like he had suddenly aged 20 years, in only seconds.

He looked tired.

"The less you know, the safer you are."

* * *

“Hey, Okumura, who was that chick from yesterday?”

Ryuji stood before Okumura's desk as their cram class was given a few minutes before the next teacher would be coming in. Honestly, he'd been a bit irritated that the red haired woman had dragged Okumura off so suddenly. Things finally seemed to be more okay between him and Ryuji, and he was planning on trying to drag him off to dinner with himself, Konekomaru and Shima that night. But then that lady came and stole him away, without even an explanation! He held back a frown as he watched as the dark haired boy look up at him, but Okumura had no qualms about hiding his scowl.

"Ugh, that was Shura," Okumura huffed, dropping his pen to lean back in his chair. "She's a friend of dad and Yukio's, apparently. She passed me for that last part of the exwire exam and I guess she's gonna be teaching me sword fighting."

Oh, well, that made sense, he guessed. Ryuji pulled a chair up to sit down on. "So you're goin' for the knight meister?"

Okumura blinked. "The knight what?"

"The- the knight meister. You know, meisters?"

"...no?"

Ryuji splutttered. Was this guy serious? "Ya don't know what meisters are?!"

"No," Okumura frowned, an embarassed flush spreading across his cheeks as he crossed his arms. "And what of it!"

"You're in an exorcist program, and you're an exwire now! How do ya _not_ know?"

"Don't get snippy with me! I didn't even know demons existed until my dad got possessed!"

"Ya-" Ryuji froze, eyes widening. "You're for real?"

"Why would I joke about that?!"

Ryuji was almost inclined to not believe him. What kind of a person joined a program to become an exorcist only days after discovering that demons and exorcists even existed? Most people who came into the program already knew about demons for years, if not their entire lives, but Okumura didn't even know the basics about ascending the ranks! It was ridiculous, honestly, wasn't his dad the paladin himself? How could that even be possible?

He guessed it sort of made sense, and it certainly explained why Okumura was so skittish around demons. But damn, was it weird. 

"Ugh, I guess I can explain," He sighed, eventually. "Look, exwire is the next rank up from page, and one down from a lower second class exorcist, which is yer entry level exorcist. But to become an exorcist, you gotta be one of the five classes: knight, dragoon, aria, doctor, or tamer."

Okumura's blank stare told him enough.

"Shit, ya really don't know any of this?!"

Konekomaru giggled to himself as he crossed the room to join their little pair, taking a seat on Okumura's desk. "Bon's not really the greatest at explaining these things. A knight is a physical kind of fighter, like with swords and knives, and a dragoon is someone who uses guns, like Okumura-sensei. Arias like Shima and I memorize bible verses, tamers like Kamiki make contracts with demons, and doctors are, well, doctors!"

"Wow, that's... a lot," Okumura looked wide-eyed at Konekomaru, while Ryuji couldn't help but think the bald-headed monk was a dirty traitor. As if sensing his thoughts, Konekomaru turned a mischievous smile towards him. "So I have to have one of these to be an exorcist?"

"You could have multiple of them, if you wanted!" Konekomaru said. "Okumura-sensei has both dragoon and doctor, I think, and the paladin, Mr. Fujimoto, he had to have all five before he could even become paladin. He's a pretty cool guy!"

Okumura's wide-eyed look faded a bit, and for some reason, he looked almost wistful. "Yeah. He's a pretty important dude, then."

"Of course! Paladins are the links between the Grigori and the exorcists as a whole, not to mention that he's the strongest exorcist around."

As Konekomaru kept talking and Okumura listened on, Ryuji couldn't help but feel his eyes drift over to look at Okumura. The guy still had that weird look on his face, and something about it just felt off, somehow. He didn't really even know why, but if it started when Konekomaru was talking about his dad, then it was probably because he was happy his dad was still alive, right? Fujimoto was an incredibly important figure for the exorcists. Ryuji was happy he was still around, too. There was no telling if the next paladin was going to be anywhere near as friendly or kind as Fujimoto.

"...I'll go for knight, then, I guess," Okumura said, eventually.

Ryuji's eye twitched. "Ya guess? This is your future, dumbass, don't say that like you just chose it at random!"

"C'mon, Bon, just 'cause people aren't as fired up as you doesn't mean they don't care!" Shima called from his seat across the room, doing a piss poor job at hiding his dirty magazine behind a textbook.

Ryuji scowled at him. "Like you're any better! You're just being lazy and going for aria, like Koneko!"

"Yeah? So what?"

"Urgh-"

“Helloooooo, exwires~!”

The attention of the room was suddenly drawn to the door of the classroom opening, and in came- hey, it was that woman from yesterday! She was decked out in a modified exorcist uniform this time, and Okumura-sensei followed behind her, already looking thoroughly irritated. Ryuji reluctantly left Okumura behind to take his seat again, and Konekomaru took his regular seat next to him, but now Ryuji’s attention was on Shura. The woman took a seat on Okumura-sensei’s desk, and the latter sighed and crossed his arms but didn’t say anything, choosing to instead give an evil eye to Shima. Ryuji heard the other member of their trio yelp behind him, followed by the slap of the magazine hitting the floor. 

“I’m Shura Kirigakure, and from today on, I’m gonna be joinin’ Yukio and Shiro in being one of yer teachers!” She said, grinning lazily. “If ya thought yer hard work was over just ‘cause yer exwires now, yer wrong! The torture’s only just beginning!”

“Shura,” Okumura-sensei groaned, reaching a hand up to rub at his nose. “What she _means_ is, from now on, we’ll be helping you all prepare for the exorcist exam in a year or so. This will include some private tutoring from ourselves and some of your other tutors to help you perfect your chosen meisters. I’m assuming you all have one in mind?”

As the exwires in the room nodded in assent, Ryuji peered at Shura in a different light, now. So that explained why she was on a first name basis with Okumura-sensei and Mr. Fujimoto, huh?

“Good. Miss Kirigakure will mostly be in charge of helping those of you going for knight, Mr. Neuhaus will be helping with those of you aspiring for tamer, myself with dragoons, and Mr. Fujimoto will round out with arias and any doctors,” Okumura-sensei explained further. “Of course, we’ll all be more than willing to give introductory lessons on any meister you happen to be interested in, so feel free to experiment around with different meisters if you’re not sure which one yet. Although I wouldn’t advise it for your first certification exam, it is allowed to try for multiple meisters at once.”

“Yeah, what he said,” Shura waved a hand at him, and either she didn’t see the way his eye twitched, or she didn’t care. Ryuji fought back a snicker. “We’re also holdin’ a trainin’ camp to see what exactly we’re startin’ with. So! In a week or two, y’all will meet us by the train station, and we’ll set off to the Academy Forest District. The chicken here’s got a check list of stuff you’ll need, and let us know if ya need help finding the money for yer supplies, yeah?”

Okumura-sensei’s eye twitched a second, more violent time, at the nick name. Shima choked back a snort behind him. “...yes. In the mean time, we’ll be continuing classes as normal, with the addition of Miss Kirigakure as an assistant teacher with Mr. Neuhaus.”

“That’s my cue to head out, then!” Miss Kirigakure chirped, and jumped off the desk and made her way towards the door. “Have fun, kiddos!”

“Goodbye, Miss Kirigakure~!” Shima crooned. Ryuji scowled and picked up his pencil, turning around to throw it directly at Shima’s forehead. “Hey! So mean!”

“Settle down!” Okumura-sensei called, frowning at the two of them. “Anyways, as I was saying, there have been increased reports of Amaimon’s kin around the school lately, so it’s imperative that you follow instructions as closely as possible. That, and don’t wander away from the camp, nor should you attempt to fight any demons on your own. You’re exwires, not exorcists, yet. Don’t overestimate yourselves.

“Now, onto our lesson about the applications of aloe in a clinical sense...”

* * *

Shiro knew that he couldn’t technically look over Mephisto’s shoulder, since the demon was at least half a foot taller than him, but that didn’t stop Shiro from hovering behind him, peering sharply at the glowing runes that Mephisto was tweaking. The runes cast an eerie orange glow over Mephisto’s face in the dusk, and each rustle of the trees of the Forest District had him tensing up more. He didn’t want to be here, not with a morally grey demon who tolerated him at best, but he wasn’t going to leave the defense system check unattended. Especially considering in less than a week and a half, his sons were going to be here, and with Amaimon in the area, he couldn’t be too careful. 

He leaned in closer towards Mephisto. “You’re sure he won’t get in?”

“Yes, Shiro,” Mephisto sighed, and Shiro couldn’t care less how irritated he was. He wouldn’t cut any corners when it came to his sons. “Nothing is getting in these barriers unless I wish them to. Are you quite happy now?”

“Barely,” Shiro grumbled. “I’ll leave now, then. Don’t forget our deal, you nut.”

Mephisto waved a hand, still looking at the runes. “Yes, yes, I recall. I won’t interfere with young Rin Okumura.”

Shiro pinned him with a suspicious glare, crossing his arms and peering at Mephisto as the demon finished the last of the runes. After what Neuhaus had told him, he was really starting to doubt that he could trust Mephisto- but what had made him think that the demon was on his side, anyways? He was an old friend, sure, but he knew nothing mattered more to Mephisto than fun bets and his own cryptic plans. Nephilim, demons and humans alike were nothing more than pawns to him. He couldn’t let himself forget that again, it could cost him his boys. 

With that ominous thought in mind, he reluctantly left Mephisto behind, making his way back towards True Cross, and eventually, back to the monastery. With the information Shura had given him, he wanted to try talking to Rin again. He understood more, now, and he related to his son’s trauma in more ways than he could really let on. 

But comforting his son? That was more important than hiding the Order’s dirty laundry. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and criticisms are always appreciated!


	7. a campground, an introspection, and a figure in the dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! Sorry for the late chapter, life has been busy recently! I also have a bit of disappointing news to share-
> 
> After this chapter, I’ll be taking a hiatus for a couple weeks or so. I’m sorry to have to stop updating, but with college and band coming soon, I have a lot of other things that I need to focus on for now. I’m not abandoning this fic, as I still have many chapters written in advance, but I figure it’ll be easier to keep writing for this fic when I’m not worried about deadlines.
> 
> I hope you all can understand! I might still update one shots and drabbles on the side, but this fic will be on pause for a little while. I love you all and your kind reviews, and I hope you’ll still stay with me when I return!

“Rin? Come sit with me for a minute?”

Shiro didn’t find any humor in how Rin startled at that anymore. 

He’d caught his eldest slipping in late again, but judging by the heady scent of restaurant food that trailed behind him, at least he was out with friends instead of out on his own. Rin reluctantly dropped his bag on the floor and shuffled his way into the kitchen, where Shiro was leaned up against the counter. The other priests had already retired for the night, of course, which was probably something Rin was counting on. Shiro stayed up. He was giving Rin some space for a bit because he didn’t want to hurt him more, but now that he knew something was going on? The time for space had passed.

Rin looked uncomfortable as always, hands twitching in his pockets. Shiro sighed, quietly, then pulled himself off of the counter and slipped down to sit on the floor. He patted the hard wood next to him, smiling at Rin. 

“Come. Sit.”

Rin did so, still not looking him in the eyes. “If- if this is about last time-“

“It’s fine, Rin, I get it,” He said, gentle, and reached his hand out to squeeze his son’s. “I’m not so sensitive I can’t see when someone’s just lashing out. Give me some credit, yeah?”

“I guess,” He mumbled. 

Shiro looked down at him, and then at the cabinets. “I never told you and Yukio about how I was raised, have I?”

He could feel Rin’s gaze on him, now, curious. He took a minute of quiet just to plot out his thoughts, how much he wanted to tell Rin, how much he _could_ tell Rin.

“I was... an orphan, raised in a medical facility. We were hardy kids, so the doctors would run trials on us for probationary medicine, and things like that. It wasn’t exactly always, well, nice, I guess. Some of them could be pretty cruel. And a lot of that...” He hesitated a second. He didn’t like talking about it. Didn’t like remembering Yuri, didn’t like remembering his brothers, didn’t like remembering any of it. But it would be worth it. “...a lot of that stuck with me, even now. It’s been almost thirty years.”

He looked over at Rin, and could see the myriad of emotions in his eyes. Shiro couldn’t tell what exactly he was thinking, but Rin was open, exposed in a way he hadn’t been since the possession. 

“What I’m getting at, is that I get it,” He squeezed Rin’s hand again, and this time, his son squeezed back. “The nightmares and all. I understand. You can tell me about these things, you know? I'm your father, I'm always here for you."

Rin's other hand flicked up to his face, and Shiro saw it come away wet, he breathed out a little laugh and released Rin's hand. He threw an arm over Rin's shoulder and drew him close, and leaned his chin against the crown of his boy's head, closing his eyes as Rin's hands fisted tightly in his coat. It was a few seconds longer before Rin spoke again, but when he did, it came out in a hoarse, shaking breath that pulled at his heart.

"I keep seeing him everywhere. I feel like- like I'm going to open my eyes and he'll be here and you'll be dead and I-"

"Hey, you're okay, kiddo," Shiro murmured, holding Rin tight. "I'm safe. You're safe. Yukio's safe.”

Rin pulled back, eyes wet and expression torn. “But what if he comes back?”

“Then I’ll beat the shit out of him,” Shiro said, and he was serious. He meant it. If Satan showed his face again, Shiro would send him down to Gehenna so hard that he’d be wiping demons out of his eyes like a windshield. Foolish or not, he wouldn’t allow the bastard to touch his family again. “No matter what it takes. I won’t let him take you, or Yukio, or anyone. He won’t find another body here.”

“You promise?” There was a desperation, a raw sort of fear in Rin’s eyes. 

“On my life,” Shiro swore. 

Rin was tense for a long minute, then like a string was cut, he fell forwards onto Shiro’s chest, a sigh falling from his mouth. Shiro hugged him close, and Rin squeezed him back, and it felt right. Like some broken pieces had been slotted back together, glued back in place where they were supposed to be. 

“Rin,” Shiro started. He looked down at his hand, at the stumps where his fingers used to be. “If the monastery is stressing you out, then there are ways we can fix this, but we can’t fix it until you tell us.”

“I know,” Rin mumbled. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, it’s already done. Goin’ forward, we can put you in True Cross’ dorms, where Yukio is. You don’t have to stay here.”

“...do you really want me to leave?” Rin asked, and Shiro couldn’t help but snort at that. 

“‘Course not. If I had it my way, both you and Yukio would stay right here with me for all eternity! But, every parent’s gotta be ready to let their kids go, and if this is going to help you, I’m willing to let you go,” He said, smiling wryly. "I hear the Kyoto kids are in a 4/4 at True Cross and could use a fourth member, or maybe Yukio wouldn't mind having a roommate."

Rin looked hesitant. "I don't know if I want to go. I don't want to leave you."

God, didn't this remind him of when the twins were so much younger? Clinging to his pants at daycare, crying when he had to leave, crying again when he went to pick them up in the afternoon. He was really starting to miss when they were cute little babies, and he could still carry them both in his arms. "Oh, kiddo, you know I'm never more than a key away."

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" Rin leaned back to look at him, eyes damp but the tears, thankfully, gone. 

"Me? Ha! Of course! I'll be able to have plenty more babes over now that you two will be out!"

That startled a smile out of Rin, and Shiro counted that as a victory. “Gross, you’re too old for that.”

“Too old?” He faked an offended look. “I’m only 51! I’m still kicking, you little shit!”

“Yeah, tell Shura that.”

Shiro's expression turned from playful to horrified. "What? Sh- what do you mean, Shura?!"

"She told me she had a crush on you once, yknow.”

"Oh Christ above give me strength."

"She's your type,” Rin’s smile widened. 

"She's half my age!" Shiro slapped his hand against his face, groaning. "Okay, no, let's... Shura is a kid to me, I can't even look at her like that."

"Tell her that," He retorted. "She keeps dragging it up every time I see her."

"That's because it embarrasses you. Take a note from Yukio's book, she lives to antagonize."

At that, Rin hesitated a moment. "...will Yukio really be okay living with me again? I'll probably ruin his reputation, or something."

"You'll only do that if you start causing trouble again," Shiro countered. "Besides, he's your brother, Rin, he loves you. That was part of his motive in becoming an exorcist, you know, he wanted to protect himself _and_ you."

Rin's eyes widened. "Really?"

He nodded. "Of course. I wanted you both to live normally, but when Yukio started seeing demons, he made that choice for himself."

It had been a shock to him, back then. Yukio had always been so skittish as a child, so afraid of everything and reliant on his brother for anything. Shiro knew that strength would have to be something for Yukio to choose on his own, and he'd almost expected Yukio to run away, scared, from the visions of demons. The offer he'd made back then wasn't one he'd actually expected Yukio to take him up on, but then his scared little boy did. He chose strength and courage, and hadn't given up even once since then. Shiro had never stopped being proud of him for it, and never would.

"I hope he can still be a doctor, some day," Rin said, quietly, looking down at Shiro's hand from where it had fallen. "Y'know, like a real one? People callin' him Dr. Okumura and all."

"He still wants to, that boy. He's gonna burn himself out, but he's as headstrong as you when he wants to be," Shiro mused. "Balancing exorcism and medical school isn't going to be easy."

Rin didn't say anything to that, still and quiet in a way that Shiro was nowhere used to seeing him. It was unnerving, honestly, to see his vibrant son contemplative, as if someone had put a dial on his energy and turned it all the way down to zero. His boys were changing so much, so quickly. He knew it was a part of children growing up, but he wished they would just stay children a little longer. He wished Yukio would stay his shy little bookworm, and Rin his energetic troublemaker.

They were growing up and moving on, and he was so proud of them, but God, he wasn't ready to let them go.

"Hey," He started, and Rin finally looked up at him. Shiro leaned forward, pressed a kiss to his forehead. "I love you, kiddo. I always will."

"...I know, dad. I love you too."

He grinned, and leaned back and reached a hand up to ruffle Rin's hair. "Alright, now it's time to get some shut eye! You got a bunch of movin' ahead of you next week!"

* * *

“Did we really have to walk alllllll the way to the campsite? This is exhausting, I’m gonna die!”

Yukio rolled his eyes for what felt like the hundredth time at Shima’s loud and whining complaints, hefting his bag further up on his shoulder as he trekked through the forests. His students, plus Shura, Shiro, and Neuhaus, followed behind him like a pack of ducks up the pathway that lead to the large clearing they'd be camping out in. Three teachers plus the paladin definitely seemed a bit much for an on-campus camping trip, but they could never be too careful. Normally, it probably would have been just himself and Shiro, but Shura and Neuhaus had been assigned along for extra instruction and protection. 

Neuhaus still made Yukio nervous in all honesty, particularly after the testing incident. But, he stayed to the back of the pack and kept his mouth shut, so Yukio told himself he had nothing to worry about. Not yet, anyways.

"Oh, shuddup, Shima, you're not even carryin' your own bag," Suguro finally snipped.

That was true. Rin, the warhorse that he was, had absolutely no trouble carrying his bag off the bus and up the first flight of stairs. But only minutes into their trek, it became blatantly obvious that most of the exwires had packed much more than they could actually carry. He had offered to carry some of the other students' bags, because Rin was always too eager to help where he could. Most of them had hesitated, but Kamiki had eagerly thrown her bag on his back, and then Rin grabbed Konekomaru's when the smaller boy stated lagging behind, and Shima's when he started bitc- complaining too loudly. 

Most of them were too exhausted at that point to notice how effortlessly Rin carried their bags, which he was grateful for. Rin’s sharper ears, canines, and ridiculous strength were inconspicuous on their own, but in one person? If people started putting two and two together, then everything could start falling apart. 

"We're almost there," He called back to them, wiping a bit of sweat off of his brow. Maybe he should take his jacket off? "Just a few minutes more."

"You kids should take this opportunity to start exercising," Shiro added on, grinning as Shima let out another groan. "You think people just carry you around on all your missions? Nah, you gotta get movin'!"

"But this has to be excessive, even for you. We've been walking for at least an hour!" Kamiki huffed. He glanced back at her to see her hand intertwined with Paku's to help drag her along the path, and Paku was holding tight to Shiemi, forming a cute little chain. He was glad to see Izumo and Shiemi getting along better, now- but maybe getting along was a strong word. Izumo tolerated her, at best, but Paku was good at stepping in to ease tensions and keep Shiemi involved.

_Because girls are actually capable of solving their issues without their fists_ , he thought to himself, sardonically. Sure, Suguro and Rin were like a bickering old married couple now, but it had taken way too many fights and arguments to get there in his opinion.

Shura made a little 'tch' noise next to him, "If ya'd rather, we can make y'all take the long way around! I know a couple paths we can take uphill."

"No!"

"We've already walked so far!"

"Ughhhhhh!"

"C'mon, Miss Kirigakure!"

"Then stop bitchin'!"

With her point made, the exwires were quieter for the last few minutes of the hike, and soon enough, the sun started setting and lowered the temperatures quite a bit. The light cast over the trees dimmed, and the breeze that swept through the branches and rustled the leaves cooled the sweat against his skin, made the heavy wool exorcist coat not quite so hot. Shima had thankfully lowered his complaining down to half-hearted mutters that were swept under the rising sounds of crickets and cicadas. Yukio felt himself smile a bit as lightning bugs started rising up, glowing in the approaching dusk.

"Summer nights, huh?" Shiro murmured, on his other side. He looked up at Yukio, a wry smile crinkling his eyes. "Remember one of your first missions, to Nara with that deer beast?"

Oh. Yukio's mood sank a bit- he was hoping Shiro would talk to him about something besides work. He forced a smile. "Yeah, I guess this does kind of feel like that afternoon, doesn't it?"

"Heh," His dad sidled a bit closer, then, bumping shoulders with him. "You and your brother settling in okay?"

"Mmhmm, he's got everything set up now," Yukio replied, trying to pick his mood back up. "I give it maybe three more days before he's leaving dirty laundry on the floor again."

Shiro laughed. "Only three? You're givin' him too much credit."

Thankfully, the campsite was just up above them, saving Yukio from having to figure out how to keep their conversation going. More than a few of the students sighed openly, a few more whooping and cheering as the dirt clearing came into view. But, those quickly turned to even louder groans when they realized no, tents were not set up for them, and yes, they'd have to pin them up themselves.

"You guys are brutal!" Shima cried, and Yukio turned around to the students just in time to see him dramatically flop onto Suguro's shoulder. The taller monk looked less than impressed.

"Well, you can whine about it, or you can start gettin' to work so you can settle down faster, yeah?" Shiro pointed out, a hand on his hip. Yukio heard Rin muffling a snicker as he set the other students' bags down. "Oh, Rin, were you just volunteering to help dig the trench for the camp fire? How kind of you! Everyone thank Rin for taking on such an arduous duty."

"Aw, c'mon, dad!"

Suguro grinned, "Loser."

"And Suguro! Taking the initiative to go out and collect firewood! Man, Yukio, you sure got a good bunch of students on your hands!"

Suguro's eyes widened. Rin openly laughed at him, which turned into Suguro slapping at his mouth to shut him up, then Rin biting his hand, and Yukio rolled his eyes as another stupid scuffle broke out. Well, at least this time they were both grinning instead of yelling in each other's faces. That was a step up, right?

"Alright, settle down," He sighed, and thankfully, the two trouble makers took the hint and quieted. He had the attention of the group now. "Paku, you and Miss Kirigakure, along with Mr. Neuhaus will set up warding seals around the perimeter of the camp site, understood? Moriyama, you and Konekomaru will be responsible for starting food for dinner. Suguro will be tracking down firewood, Rin will be in the pit, and the rest of us will set up tents and other amenities. Everyone understand their roles?"

"Um, sensei? What about Takara?"

Yukio startled. Honestly, he was pretty embarrassed to admit that he'd forgotten their quietest student, whose puppet looked at him pointedly from where Takara stood by Neuhaus. "Takara can fill in wherever he feels necessary."

"What?! He doesn't even have to do anything?!" Shima protested loudly.

Yukio gave him a look. "You can keep complaining, or you can get to work and we can be done for the night, yes?"

"Yes, sensei."

He watched the group of exwires and accompanying teachers as they separated and scattered about to do their jobs, a few of them looking much more reluctant than others. Yukio observed them only long enough to see that they were following through with their own responsibilities and not shirking them off, then he turned to where Shiro was waiting beside him.

"Forgot about Takara again, huh?" Shiro asked, a knowing look on his face.

Yukio sighed, allowing himself just a moment to be open with his father. "Honestly? Yes. I don't like how... inconspicuous he is."

"Ha! Well, that doesn't ever go away. The Order has eyes and ears everywhere, there's always gonna be someone watching," Shiro slapped a hand against his shoulder, and Yukio smiled a bit.

(He wished things were like this more often.)

But then Shiro was wandering off, leaving Yukio with both Izumo and Shima, who had been waiting patiently by the tents for him. Yukio couldn't help but follow Shiro as he walked away, something in his chest fidgeting a bit when he saw his father and his twin strike up a conversation while Rin was hacking away at a hole with a shovel from their supply pack. 

He'd come home week or so ago, just to drop off a few papers for his dad about some mission he'd been on with a few other exorcists tracking Amaimon's approach before he went back to the dorms for the night. He'd caught a glance, when he passed the kitchen, of Shiro and Rin deep in a conversation, sitting on the floor but looking for all the world like Rin hadn't just been avoiding the monastery for days. Rin was smiling, Shiro was ruffling his hair, and Yukio was in the hallway. 

Yukio didn't know why it made his chest tight when he saw it (yes, he did). He’d left the papers by the door and left the way he'd come, without a single word spoken to either of them.

He frowned to himself, hiding it from his students by rubbing at his mouth. He knew why Shiro had to focus on Rin, he got it. Even before Rin was scarred by Satan's possession, he was a troubled kid who needed the attention, needed the help to get by in life. Yukio didn't. He was fine on his own, he told himself. This was what he wanted, by choosing to become an exorcist- he wanted to be independent, strong on his own. But that was easier when he still had Rin, when they could still joke and harass each other, and even if he was so envious of his brother that it hurt, he could at least distract himself. 

Now, looking at Rin and Shiro talking so easily, he felt a bit like an outsider looking in. He bet they weren’t talking about work. 

"Hey, Okumura-sensei?"

Yukio blinked as his name was called, and looked over to see Shima and Kamiki standing by a toppled, messy excuse of a tent. _Keep a lid on it until you’re alone_ , he told himself. 

"We kinda messed it up," Shima said, sheepish.

"Well, we wouldn't have if you would've just listened to me!" Kamiki snipped, crossing her arms with a huff. "I told you we needed to set up the wire frames first!"

"I'm sorry, Kamikiiiii!”

"Calm down, calm down, I'm coming," Yukio called, crossing the campsite to get a better look at the mess of metal poles and fabric that they'd created. "Well, for starters, we need to begin with laying the tent out first.."

They tried again with the three of them, and after a bit more trial and error, they managed to set up the first of their four tents. Once Shiro finally got around to joining them, they were able to get a second and third one up before night fell. Rin had apparently finished digging the fire pit, and with Suguro's firewood and matches from Shiro, they hacked together a campfire that lit up the clearing in a warm orange glow. Rin took over cooking when it was clear Shiemi knew herbs, but not anything of how to cook with them. As he did, the wards around the campsite were finished up and the tents were constructed.

From then on, the students went about settling their belongings in the tents, as Shiemi and Konekomaru started lighting up lanterns to set up around the perimeter. Suguro had taken up a seat next to the campfire, a notebook and homework in hand while he walked Paku through some of the graded assignments they'd gotten back before the summer break. Once Shiemi joined them by the fire, Izumo had apparently decided that she was too tired to be rude, and was leaning her head against the shoulder of Shiemi, who looked entirely too elated about that. Shura had found a beer, as always, and was sidled up with the other teachers on a collection of lawn chairs that they had brought along- with no intentions of sharing with the students, of course.

Yukio threw the last of the rain sheets over the fourth tent. It was good timing, too, because Rin was already starting to hand out bowls of food and he certainly didn't want to miss out on that. Shura drunkenly beckoned him over to the group of teachers, much to his chagrin, but once he'd gotten food of his own, he chose to stand next to his father. The students were more settled now, with a warm meal between their palms and sleeping bags waiting for them.

"Look at 'em,' Shura giggled. "They got no idea what's comin' tomorrow."

Well, so much for their easy mood, huh?

Shima tensed, looking over at them from his position next to Konekomaru. "...tomorrow?"

That was enough to get the rest of the group's attention, and were he in a better mood, Yukio almost could've laughed at the dawning looks of apprehension on their faces.

"What, you didn't think we were only here to camp, did you?" Shiro asked, innocently.

"Crack of dawn, punks!" Shura crowed, leaning back so far in her chair that Shiro's hand snapped out to steady her. “You got trainin’ exercises!”

Kamiki's eyes were wide. "You're kidding, right?"

"Nope~!"

"Your assignment tomorrow starts at dawn, but if you'd like to sleep in tomorrow morning, you're more than welcome to head back to True Cross yourselves," Yukio said, and trusted that the threat didn't need to be spelled out. "You'll have more information tomorrow, but enjoy your last chance to relax for now."

"So ominous," Konekomaru murmured, and Shima nodded frantically in agreement.

But that was all the information they would be giving the students for today, no matter how much they tried to egg out more details. The exwires finished their meal, and in short order, were escorted to their tents and sent to bed, last of which being Shiro and Yukio. The tent set up had to be a little odd, with their number of girls and boys. Of course, the Exwire girls roomed together, and the Kyoto boys, but Shura ended up passing out in Yukio's own sleeping bag. Rin had offered Yukio his own, and before he really knew what was going on he suddenly found himself in a tent with Takara and a drunk Shura.

And he knew that it wasn't meant in a way to exclude him, but now he really did feel like an outsider looking in.

* * *

Rin had been told plenty of times that he slept heavy enough to sleep through the rapture, but when a feeling of _badbadbadcoming_ rocketed down his spine, he was awake and aware in seconds.

His first thought was that it was a bad dream- he'd had them so many times now that it wouldn't be a surprise. Even though his breaths echoed in the dark tent, his heartbeat was steady in his chest, and his shirt was dry. So, no nightmare, but the hair on the back of his neck stood on end and goosebumps blazed a cold path down his arms, and he knew that whatever woke him up, it was still there.

He wiggled out of his sleeping back and straightened up to stand on his feet, glancing around the tent to see his father still sleeping soundly next to him, but Neuhaus? The creepy teacher's sleeping bag was empty, and the man was gone. Rin frowned at where he was supposed to be, and pulled his hands up to rub at his arms, fighting back a shiver from the cool night air that swept in. Wait. Cool night air? Confused, he looked towards the entrance, and saw the fabric flaps still blowing a bit in the wind. So Neuhaus had only just left recently, huh? Probably to go take a leak, certainly not anything he cared to see. He’d probably woken Rin up on his way out, then. 

But it wasn't often that he had some time to himself. So, even though it was way too damn early in the morning and he knew he'd regret it when the sun came up, he shuffled around his dad's feet and ducked out of the tent. It was dark as hell, but once his eyes adjusted and he could see more clearly (uncomfortably clearly, in a way he knew full humans couldn't but tried not to think about), he could see the stars up in the sky above him. He spent a few minutes there, just staring up at the sliver of the moon and the bright stars around it. The breeze was cool on his face, and for just a minute or two, he closed his eyes and just, well, existed.

He certainly wouldn't call himself the thoughtful type, but things just felt peaceful now, with the quiet rustling of the trees, and everyone else asleep and away. The dirt was warm against his feet from the day’s sun, and he pulled his arms inside of his shirt, walking quietly past the other tents and carefully towards the line of runes that surrounded the camp. He'd overheard Paku saying that they were just supposed to ward away low level demons, that Mephisto's spell walls would keep away the higher ranked ones, but he still looked at it warily as he pulled his arms out and stretched a hand over the lines. There was a weird tingling, but besides that, nothing. Rin cautiously crossed the lines, breathing out a sigh when he made it to the other side safely.

_Hopefully it'll let me back in_ , he thought idly to himself, following one of the pathways out of the camp site and into the woods. As he walked, his phone buzzed, and he reached into his pocket to pull it out.

_gorilla : wher ythe hellre you goin_

Rin breathed an amused huff out of his nose at the errors in the text. He'd learned from the last training excursion that Suguro could be pretty scary when he was woken up.

_You : using the bathroom. go back to sleep._

_gorilla : pk_

_gorilla : ok_

He slid his phone back into his pocket, a smile still lingering on his lips. It was... nice, admittedly, having friends. Suguro, who was stubborn as all hell but as genuine as people come. Shima, who was a pervert but who slacked off on homework with him. Konekomaru, who was sweet and kind and always willing to help. Godain, who made sure he kept up on schoolwork and reminded him of how good people were. Kamiki, as prickly as she was, and Shiemi, who was always armed with a smile, and Paku, who always tried to help everyone get along. People actually wanted to be around him, and not just to say that they'd made friends with the school thug.

He knew it was because they didn't know. Rin knew that if they found out who his real father was, what he'd done, what Rin had done, they'd leave him, with no hesitation. He knew that.

But here, relaxed and sleepy and enjoying this summer night? He pretended, for just a while, that he could have this.

He pretended to himself that he could be human.

And what a great sin to God that must have been. 

"Oh, you're kinda scrawnier than big brother said you would be."

Rin froze. 

It wasn’t a voice he recognized. 

(Something told him to run very, very far away.)

"So you're our half-human little brother, huh?" The voice drawled, somewhere up in front of him. A pair of gold eyes peered through the dark. "The one with Father's flames?"

The eyes disappeared, and then a dark figure slunk forward from the shadows, a grubby little hobgoblin at its feet. A sliver of moonlight crept through the trees, and Rin could see it then. A man who slumped forwards when he walked, a lollipop in his mouth. If his green hair and strange outfit weren't enough to convince him that this man was not human, his eyes did the trick.

Golden. Cold. Disinterested.

"I'm Amaimon, a demon king. I'm pretty much your older brother, yeah?" Amaimon said, head cocking lazily to the side. "Big brother wants me to test you, but you don't look all that interesting."

Rin swallowed, but his throat was dry. "Who- what are you? What do you want?"

"Ah? Seriously? I just told you," Amaimon's mouth twitched downwards, displeased. "Are you even listening? I said I'm here to test you, stupid."

"Wh-"

Amaimon plucked the sucker from his mouth, dropping it to the ground. "Do try to make things interesting."

His eye's widened but quick as lightning, the demon king lunged at him. It was only instincts that had him ducking under the wild punch, but then Amaimon's knee drove into his stomach with all the strength of a bag of cement. Rin wheezed, fighting down the rush of nausea to shove the demon as hard as he could. Amaimon stumbled backwards, but it was enough to separate them.

He ran.

"Running already? We haven't even started!"

Fuck. Fuck! Who the hell was this guy? What did he mean, test him? Rin dashed through the trees and through the undergrowth, trying to put as much distance between himself and the camp that he could. 

This guy was bad news! He didn't know how he knew that, but he did, and the crashing of Amaimon's footsteps only feet behind him had fear rushing up into his throat. He knew no matter what, he couldn't lead him near the camp.

The hairs on the back of his neck rose, and without thinking, he ducked just in time to see a clawed hand swipe above his head. He was in a losing battle! He had no weapons, no experience, no backup- the only thing he had was years of brawling honed over years of being cornered and jumped by thugs. 

He prayed it would be enough.

(please God, let it be enough)

Rin stretched his hand out to a tree to his left, swung around its circumference violently and came up behind Amaimon. He raised a foot and kicked Amaimon into the trunk with all his strength. He felt a little victorious when the demon grunted, but then Amaimon whirled around, and the bored irritation in his eyes sent shiver's down Rin's spine.

"Is that the best you've got?"

Amaimon threw another punch, whistling through the air. Rin ducked, but the fist changed direction, and he yelped as his hair was suddenly grabbed in an iron grip. A knee smashed into his nose one, twice, a crunch of bone and blood flooded his nose. He grunted, reached up to grab Amaimon's wrist and arm, and twisted. His back hit Amaimon's abdomen, then he was throwing the demon to the ground as hard as he could. He raised his foot and stomped down on Amaimon's stomach- it was hard like fucking iron!

The demon king snarled, grabbed his ankle and suddenly he was weightless, eyes wide before his back suddenly hit a tree, knocking the breath out of him. Faster than he could blink, Amaimon was there, eyes narrowed. His other hand reared back, and Rin squeezed his eyes shut and _pulled_.

The blue flames seared past his eyelids, exploded in a gust of hot air that forced the demon king back. Rin let them burn, a wild bonfire between himself and that monster.

"So that's it, huh?" Amaimon murmured, just loud enough to be heard. "Father's flames, you have them!"

Rin spat out blood to the ground, reached a hand up to feel the throbbing, hot mess of his nose. Broken. Definitely broken.

Amaimon frowned, deeper this time. "Are you ignoring me? I'm talking to you."

"The paladin's here!" His voice sounded pathetic to even his own ears, but it was worth a try. "Shiro Fujimoto! You don't stand a chance against him!"

"Hmm, perhaps, but he's not _here_ here, is he?" Amaimon asked, simply. "I have enough time."

He didn't have to wait long to figure out what that meant.

A hand grabbed his throat, choked the breath out of him and threw him to the ground. Amaimon's boot crashed into his ribs, his hip, his shoulder blade- something snapped. He flung a hand out to grab something, anything, but the demon's heel crushed his wrist into the dirt before jerking to the side in a blow to his temple that made his vision fuzz black and head explode with pain. He bit back a cry, tried to scramble backwards but suddenly Amaimon was sitting on his stomach, heavy as a car. Hands wrapped around his throat, pinning him down, and he scratched deep groves into Amaimon's arms but the demon didn't budge.

"You're kinda pathetic," Was all Amaimon said, eyes wide and blank. "I expected more. Where are the rest of your flames, brother?"

"Piss off!" He gasped, but then the fingers tightened and his head pulsed violently. The camp was too close, he couldn't risk it! It was dark, they'd see the fire instantly and figure out what he was, and he couldn't take that gamble!

Amaimon's head cocked to the side. "You'll never beat me without them. C'mon, show me."

Fuck no. He wasn't going to give this freak whatever he wanted! Rin snarled, his hand shooting forwards to slash wildly at the demon's face. Amaimon let out a startled noise as Rin's claws sliced through his skin, and his grip loosened enough for Rin to jerk his foot up and plant it deep in Amaimon's gut. The demon king was thrown backwards, and Rin sucked in a deep breath once he was freed, coughing up saliva and blood alike. Amaimon looked up at him, eyes narrowing, but he was expecting it this time.

He lunged at Rin, but Rin caught his hands, grunting as he strained against Amaimon's stronger arms. He wrested them aside, and with all the strength he could call up, headbutted Amaimon in the nose. But Amaimon's bones were stronger, and Rin's head pounded and his balance tilted. The demon grabbed his shirt, pulled him forward and headbutted him back, twice as hard. He cursed as the skin on his forehead split, blood trickling down and into his eyes. That had to be a concussion. There was no way it wasn't.

He grabbed Amaimon's hands blindly, but the demon refused to let go no matter how hard Rin's claws dug in.

"I told you," Amaimon hissed. "You're weak! Use your flames! What's the point of having them if you never use them? It's a waste!"

Rin hissed at him, could barely see through the blood in his eyes, but movement in the trees caught his attention. His eyes widened, and if he blinked away the gunk in his eyes, he could see a person now! An exorcist coat, brown hair-

Neuhaus!

The man looked up at him, and Rin could've cried out of relief. The man had come to help! Sure his flames were out, but Neuhaus already knew about that, right? He was still Rin's teacher, right? He'd help!

But when his vision cleared, Neuhaus' eyes were cold. Cold as Amaimon's.

_No_ , Rin's stomach fell. _No, please, don't, I need your help! Don't leave me!_

"Sensei!" He called, desperate, pleading.

His teacher looked at him, and huffed out a laugh.

Neuhaus left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and criticisms are always appreciated Much love to you all ❤️


	8. a rifle, a plan, and a summons to court

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm so happy to be bringing you guys another chapter! I hope you all enjoy it, and I'm super excited to start showing you all what I've been working on.
> 
> I would also like to thank all of you for your kind words and comments. I'm a little awkward at replying, but I promise that I treasure every comment that I read! (I've also started writing them down in a lil notebook so I have motivation whenever I'm stuck or feeling insecure in my writing hehe).
> 
> Happy reading, and thank you all for being so patient!
> 
> chapter warnings: violence, injury, mishandling of a child (the adults are a lil mean to rin)

Yukio was woken by the sound of screaming.

Shura seized near violently awake next to him, and the tent was lit up by the glow of her sword as she dragged it out from his chest. His hand was under his pillow and on his gun immediately, and it was then that the sound thumping, growling, and shouting could be heard. His stomach dropped to his feet- an attack?

"He's here," Came Takara's voice. He was solemn as he sat upright in his sleeping back,closed eyes turned down towards the puppet in his hands.

"What the _hell_ does that mean?!" Shura snapped. She kicked aside the blankets around her and sprung to her feet, and Yukio was close on her heels as she tore out of the tents. They didn't have time to figure out whatever cryptic warning Takara was trying to give them!

The fire at the center of the camp was out, but lanterns bobbed frantically in the hands of Shiemi and Kamiki, the exwires gathered in a huddle at the edge of the clearing. He looked up at the barrier, saw a purple glow as the biggest hobgoblin he'd ever seen in his life screeched and threw itself against the wall. Its beady eyes were narrowed in on the terrified group of exwires, on the one student who stood determined and chanted verses loud enough for Yukio to hear, even across the camp as they were. He scowled in an almost hysterical mix of anger and panic.

"Suguro!" He shouted, saw the monk stop and look at him. "STop chanting! Wait for back up!"

"Yukio!"

The voice came from somewhere to his left, from his father. His head snapped to the side and he looked at Shiro, and an awful, curdling feeling of fear fell over him when he saw his own panic reflected so clearly across Shiro's face. His father was half way out of the tent he'd been sleeping in, coat thrown over sweatpants and a t-shirt, but all Yukio could think see was the startling lack of anyone next to him.

"Rin's gone!"

The breath from his lungs disappeared, and Yukio felt his head turning back towards the barrier, towards the raging hobgoblin and the blackness that stretched beyond it. He could hear it, the sound of trees cracking, the flashes of blue light.

No.

No, no no no!

He didn't hesitate a moment longer. He ran faster than he'd ever had in his life, brandishing his guns like a shield and ignoring the panicked calls of Shiro and Shura behind him. The hobgoblin turned to him as he crossed the barrier, and with deadly precision, he fired off round after round into the demon's face. It howled, slashed wildly at him but missed by a hair as Yukio jerked to the side. Another shot, another scream of the beast, and metal flashed in the air next to him as Shura shouted again. He grabbed the grenade out of the air, ripped the pin out with his teeth and threw it into the hobgoblin's mouth.

The explosion of holy water only served to infuriate the demon more.

Before he could raise his gun again, a hand grabbed him by the collar and yanked him backwards so harshly that he choked. The hand let him go to turn him around, and Shiro looked down at him, fear buried so far down beneath determination that Yukio almost believed it didn't exist at all.

"It's Amaimon!" Yukio was breathless, heart hammering in his chest. "Rin's out there, and-"

"I know!" His father's expression broke, if only for just a second. "But I can't lose the both of you! Stay here, we'll coordinate an attack and go _together."_

He didn't want to waste another minute, not when his brother was trapped out there with yet another demon king who was no doubt hell bent on dragging him to Gehenna. But Shiro's grip allowed no disagreement, and Yukio reluctantly lowered his gun. Shiro then immediately turned to the exwires who had gathered around them. Looking at them, at the way Konekomaru's hands shook, the way Izumo held her summoning paper white knuckled, the way Shiemi's eyes were wide and afraid and the rest of the students looked no better, Yukio was hit with a sudden wave of despair. They were exwires, they didn't stand a chance against this type of hobgoblin, much less a demon king!

Shiro took the lead when Yukio faltered, expression grim but calmer. "I need you kids to listen to me. This is not a simulation. This is an attack on the academy by the demon king Amaimon, and that, there?" He pointed to the beast, trying its damndest to break through the shield. "Is his personal lackey. We'll protect you with our lives, but to get Rin back and keep you all alive, I need you all to swear to me that you'll follow our orders to the letter, yes?"

A few of them nodded, choked out a few 'yes's.

"Good," Shiro continued. "Shura, douse the kids in holy water. It's not much but when that demon gets in, it'll be better than nothing."

" _When_ it gets in?" Konekomaru squeaked.

"The shield won't hold it for long," Kamiki's eyes were hard, but the paper was crinkling in her fingers. "It's only meant to hold low-level demons, that thing is too strong for it."

Shiro nodded, "Yes, and when it comes in, we need to attack together. Shima, you and Shura take front line. Suguro and Miwa, find the thing's fatal verse, and stay behind Moriyama. Can you create a shield again, like you did in the exam?"

Her eyes widened, startled, but she nodded anyways.

"Whatever you do, protect yourself and our two arias, got it?" He ordered, and Shiemi nodded again, more determined this time. "Paku, follow up with any wards you know, bolster her defenses, and Kamiki, take up the rear."

Yukio didn't need it to be said aloud to know that himself and Shiro would be going after Rin. It was understood across the group, in the silent sort of way that one knows the tolling of funeral bells. He looked up at the goblin again, the rippling of the shield a sit threatened to shatter at any minute. He didn't see blue flashes anymore, and something told him that wasn't the good news it should be.

"We barely have minutes until the barrier breaks. Get the supplies you need, get doused, and let's go!"

The group scattered, and Yukio made a quick beeline back towards the tent and his bag of weapons. There was no time to change his clothes, so he threw on his coat and slung his gun holsters over his shoulder. Takara was gone, but if Yukio had to be honest, the strange exorcist spy was at the very back of his mind.

As he stepped back out of the tent, the students were gathered in more organized chaos. Shura, still in her own pajamas, threw gallons of holy water over the students, shouting orders as they prepared weapons. Kamiki's byakko were at her feet, dodging the drips of holy water, and Shima had his staff prepared and braced against the ground. Yukio watched twisting vines sprout from Shiemi's familiar, as Miwa and Suguro crept back dutifully behind her.

It was all Yukio could do to close his eyes and pray that it would be enough.

He looked up, and saw Shiro standing grimly before him. A rifle was held in his hand, and in the other scarred one, a slip of summoning paper that he whispered a phrase to and held away from his face as it puffed up with smoke. Kuro, his black cat sidhe, jumped up from the paper and landed on Shiro's shoulder with a happy purr.

"Kuro," Shiro's deadly serious voice had Kuro pausing, peering down at him. "I need you to go alert the exorcists, tell them that the demon king Amaimon is attacking and we need backup."

The cat meowed, hopped off his shoulder and trotted away from the two of them before abruptly growing as tall as a car. Kuro shook himself, fur rustling, and then he was off, bounding through the trees and towards the academy. Yukio's legs felt numb.

"They'll see," He breathed.

Shiro turned away, grip tightening on the rifle. "...let's go."

With that, they were off, and Yukio followed Shiro as the two ran past the barrier and the rampaging goblin. The forest was dark, trees rustling and creaking now like old wooden steps as the sound of shouting and branches cracking only grew louder. There was a flash of blue, and Yukio's breath caught.

Rin.

"-at... show you-" He could hear a voice through the trees, demonic and angry and unrecognizable- Amaimon! "...ignore me!"

A scream rang out. His blood ran cold. "Rin!"

Shiro skidded to a stop before him, and barely a second later, there was a loud cracking as a dark shape hurtled towards them. Yukio yelped as the figure hit the ground and wheezed, curling in on itself. His eyes widened when he recognized his brother, his arms wrapped tight around his ribs and blood splattered over his face. Yukio dropped to his knees and grabbed Rin, pulled him back as Shiro stood in front of them.

And before Shiro crouched Amaimon, tail lashing wildly and face twisted into a snarl. There were flickers of blue flame dancing on the ground, giving Amaimon's face a ghastly azure-tinted glow.

"Get out of my way!" The demon king hissed, and his voice sent chills down Yukio's spine.

Shiro, however, didn't falter, posture confident and easy. "Amaimon, huh? I exorcised Astaroth just the other day, I doubt you'll be much more difficult."

"You-" Amaimon's ears flicked back against his head, and Yukio watched his eyes widen, but then his expression snapped back to rage. "You'll pay for that!"

"Oh, and you're going to make me?" Shiro laughed, bringing his rifle up to set its sights on the demon. "Give it your best shot, I'll go easy on you."

Amaimon didn't hesitate a second longer, lunging at Shiro faster than Yukio's eyes could even keep up. But then there was a deafening crack and a flash of light as their father's rifle fired a round directly into Amaimon's face, sending the demon king screeching backwards in a mess of blood and gunpowder. Yukio could only watch as the demon threw itself at Shiro again, and again, and each time, their father fought him back so effortlessly, as if he were just taking a walk through the park and not defending his sons from the King of Earth.

This was a paladin, he thought to himself. The best exorcist of them all.

His attention was drawn back down to Rin as his brother hissed in pain, twisting in Yukio's arms. There was blood dripping from his forehead, his nose bent crooked and from deep slashes across his stomach. He looked bad. He looked really bad.

"Stay still, Rin," Yukio breathed, trying to sound calmer than he was as he let Rin back to the ground to hover over him, trying to catalog his injuries. He was a doctor, he knew a body inside and out and was one of the best medics that True Cross had on hand. But now, looking at his own brother, beaten and bloodied and sucking in painful, whistling breaths- all he could feel was fear. Hands shaking violently, he wrestled his coat over himself and folded it, pressing it against Rin's stomach to staunch the bleeding. His twin winced, forced open blurry eyes to look up at him. That was good. Awareness.

The sounds of snarling and gunshots rung in his ear, each flash of the rifle lighting up the night. "Where are you hurt?"

Rin squirmed away from the pressure. "...hurts..."

"Where?" Yukio pressed, his heart stuttering in his chest. "Rin, where are you hurt?"

"There- stomach."

He pulled his coat away and squinted through the down at the gashes in his abdomen. The edges were sizzling, pulling back together. "It's healing. We have to go, Rin, c'mon!"

Yukio pulled himself up to his feet, and reached down to grab Rin's arms. His brother grimaced, muffled a groan of pain, but managed to stumble to his feet. Yukio grabbed him around the back and held Rin's arm over his shoulders, damn near dragging the staggering weight of his twin away from the cock fight behind them. He chanced a glance back at Shiro, watching as his father shot down a swarm of goblins that sprouted up to protect Amaimon.

"Dad!" He called back, and Shiro looked over to them.

"Go!" Shiro shouted. "I'll cover you! Get back to the camp!"

He didn't wait another minute.

Rin wasn't exactly light or easy to carry, and each footstep Yukio took felt like he was about to trip in the dark and send them both flying. His breathing, harsh and ragged, was loud in the silence that grew louder the farther away they got from the gunshots, squealing of demons, and bible verse chanting. With each step, Rin's weight lessened, and they ran through the trees faster as his twin could start carrying himself. He looked up, could see the shimmering wall of the shield around the camp. Relief washed through him so strong his legs nearly buckled.

And just as quickly, that relief was dashed as the shield broke with the sound of shattering glass.

Yukio froze, eyes wide as the shield disappeared. Shouts and screams broke out, alongside furious growling and the screeching of metal against metal. It was Rin who pulled him along, desperate.

"The sword," Rin said, voice rasping and coarse. "It's in the tent."

He was already pulling himself free. Yukio grabbed his arm, voice shrill. "Are you insane? No! You're still human, you can't-"

"I won't let them die!" Rin snapped, chest heaving with the effort of breathing.

"Dad has it covered!"

"I can't just watch and do nothing!"

"Would you stop being so self important for three goddamn seconds?!" Of all the times to be bullheaded and stubborn, Rin had to choose _now?_ Yukio could throttle him! "Shura is out there fighting, and back up is coming! Just think through what you're doing before you go charging off!"

Rin recoiled at his words, but Yukio couldn't bring himself to stop and tiptoe around his brother's feelings, not while Amaimon was still out there and that giant goblin was too. They didn't have the time to stand around and argue! Yukio grabbed Rin's wrist, dragged him off running towards the camp. Sure they'd given the exwires a plan, but there was no way Shura would be able to defend them all at once and kill the goblin.

He skidded to a stop behind one of the tents, whirled around on his heel and shoved his second pistol into Rin's hands.

"You stay _here,"_ He ordered, gripping Rin's hands as tight as he could to get that point across. "Stay out of the way, and do _not_ draw the sword!"

* * *

Y'know, maybe getting rid of the biggest goddamn goblin on the face of Assiah would have been easier if Mr. Fujimoto had told them _what_ the damn thing's fatal verse was!

Ryuji barreled through every single verse he'd ever memorized, every single book and chapter he'd ever read, but nothing even slowed the demon down as it roared and slashed at their front fighters. Through the tangle of Moriyama's shield, he could see the beast that Miss Kirigakure was, brutally swinging the goblin back with Shima's back up. But the demon was still charging forward, eyes glued to some spot behind them. Konekomaru had his forehead leaned against Ryuji's shoulder, clinging close as he too chanted any verses he could remember, voice tight with fear. Ryuji had one arm slung over Konekomaru's back, holding him close as his free hand clutched prayer beads.

He wouldn't let this stupid beast lay a hand on his friends.

...but he was quickly running out of verses.

"Where is Okumura-sensei and Mr. Fujimoto?!" Kamiki demanded as she crouched behind them, barely hiding her own panic as she watched her byakko tear at the goblin's arms. "We need back up!"

"The exorcists had to have heard us by now!" Paku was holding Moriyama up as the blonde girl focused on the greenman in her hands, but her face was gradually starting to turn paler as the shield stayed up.

"What about Neuhaus-sensei?"

"I don't know!" Paku's voice cracked, and she squeezed her eyes shut. "I haven't seen him since yesterday!"

Konekomaru stopped his chanting, reaching a hand up to clutch onto Ryuji's sleeve. "Did he abandon us?"

"Who cares!" Ryuji snapped- he'd run out of verses, but he refused to let this be the end! They couldn't go down while Okumura was still trapped out there. "If that bastard wants to be a coward, he can! We don't need him anyways!"

"Are you stupid?!" Kamiki whirled on him, eyes wide and teeth bared. "We're going to die! He's the smart one!"

Paku looked up at her, lips trembling. "Izumo! Don't say that!"

Ryuji scowled at her. Trust Kamiki to be the type to chicken out under stress. "Pull yourself together, dumbass! We're only gonna die if we start givin' up, so stop freakin' out!"

They all flinched as the shield shook with a colossal _whump_ , shouting ringing out from Kirigakure-sensei and Shima alike, and Moriyama slumped against Paku. Before they could even process that, he heard the telltale sharp cracks of Okumura-sensei's pistol, and his scowl fell apart. Okumura-sensei was back! That had to mean that Okumura junior was okay, right? He had to be safe! They had to keep fighting!

"Look," He started, and felt his classmates' eyes turn to him. "Moriyama's shield ain't gonna hold much longer! She's done her part, we can't rely on her anymore now that the verses aren't workin'! We gotta distract the stupid shit so Miss Kirigakure and Shima can get him, and we can get the hell outta here!"

"What are we even going to do?" Konekomaru asked, frantic.

He looked to Paku, determined. "Paku, what kinda runes do you got?"

"Um!" She startled, but thankfully wasn't falling to pieces like Kamiki was. "I have some explosion types, but they're not strong enough to do any real damage. I'm sorry!"

"That works! We can use that to draw its attention away. Can you write some up fast?"

"Yes, but I'll need some summoning paper!"

"Ugh, fine! Since you guys want to die so bad, here!" Kamiki rifled through her pajama pants and yanked out a sheaf of papers, thrusting them and a short stick of charcoal into Paku's hands. She looked up to glare at Ryuji. "This plan of yours had better work, gorilla."

"Do you always have to insult me?" He snapped back, but even he knew this wasn't a time to be fighting. Shiemi's eyes were drooping shut, and her plant shield wouldn't last much longer. "Moriyama, can you dismiss the shield on cue?"

She blinked up at him, dazed. "...sure thing."

"Alright, how many can you make in a minute?" Ryuji turned to ask Paku, who was already scribbling runes on the papers around Shiemi in her arms.

She looked up at him, fear fading into determination. "I can make a couple, but you'll have to carry Moriyama!"

"I can do that. Sixty seconds, and we make our move!"

From then on, it was a blur of movement. They made the decision to wrap the runes in whatever jackets or sweaters they could spare, to make it bigger and more distracting. Paku managed nearly seven seals, hid four of them in their cloth bundle and tucked the rest into her waistband. The seconds ticked by, and as Shiemi's eyes finally closed and her greenman dismissed itself, they were finally ready.

Looking the giant hobgoblin in the face, however, was an entirely separate matter. Ryuji thought that had to be the scariest damn thing he'd ever seen in his life, right up with the naberius who almost decapitated him.

But the plan was already in motion. He gripped Moriyama in his arms, Konekomaru threw the bundle of cloth, and then they scattered as the beast pounced on the bundle. With a shout, Paku detonated the runes, and the cloth exploded into the goblin's face.

"What the hell are you idiots doing?!" Miss Kirigakure near shrieked as the goblin roared and flailed, lashing out with a fist that nearly crushed Shima. Her arm was bloodied, the other arm holding a purple katana. Okumura-sensei was by his side, looking equally dumb founded.

He didn't have time to explain to them, not while Moriyama was out cold in his arms. Even with the screaming of the beast behind him, he didn't look back, just gripped her tight and ran as fast as he could to the tents. They wouldn't protect her, but they could hide her, at least until back up came. He skidded behind one of the tents from earlier, panting as he came face to face with-

"Okumura!"

"Suguro?"

Okumura stood before him, bloodied and clutching his ripped shirt, but alive. Ryuji was almost hysteric enough to hug the life right out of him, but Moriyama came first. He knelt down on the ground, eased her onto the dirt before looking back at Okumura, who looked horrified.

"What happened to her?!"

"Verses failed," He said, breathless. "And her shield gave out. She's down for the count."

Okumura's expression crumpled, guilt and despair written all over his face. "...this is my fault."

"Shit, Okumura!" Of all the times for this! He stood and reached forward to grip his friend's shoulders, squeezing them tight. "We ain't got the time for blaming! That stupid demon is still over there, and there's gonna be a lot more injured than just Moriyama if we don't take its ass down!"

His mouth opened, then closed, then opened again, eyes wide as he held up the pistol in his hand. "I- Yukio gave me this, but I don't-"

"Ya can't use it, can you?" Ryuji asked, and Okumura nodded. He took the pistol in his hand, checked the magazine and slide as he pointed it to the ground. Instincts, beaten into him by Okumura-sensei's lessons on firearms. Like he expected, it was fully loaded and ready. He looked back up at Okumura. "I got it. You watch her, I'll cover us if that shit comes here, yeah?"

He waited only long enough for Okumura's nod, but before he could say anything, there was another ground-shaking thud. The goblin screeched again, but this time it sounded different. He could see Okumura's face turn deadly pale, ears lowered flat against his head and eyes wide. Ryuji followed his gaze, saw the goblin dancing gleefully in the wreckage of a tent, a sheathed katana gripped in his hand.

...was that kurikara?

Ryuji was too shocked by the blade- his family's blade!- to see Okumura run past him, but by the time he did, his friend was already throwing himself at the goblin.

"Okumura, what the hell?!" Acting purely on instinct, he brought the gun up and fired a round into the side of the demon. It barely even seemed to phase it, too focused as it was on wrestling the katana out of Okumura's hand. "Are you insane?! You stupid shit, let it go! It's not worth your life!"

But then the demon yanked, and he stumbled back, and the sword was unsheathed.

And Okumura burst into bright blue light.

The goblin shrieked as it was lit up.

" _...fifteen years ago... blue night... thousands of exorcists dead..."_ It was like he could hear it all, staring at the roaring flame that incinerated the goblin and lit up the night. " _...konekomaru's mother and father... takezo..."_

The killer blue fire he'd only heard of in stories and whispers was suddenly before him, and at the center of it all, was Okumura Rin. Ears extended long like a beast's, a black tail cracking forth with the snap of leather, horns of fire. Only one word came to mind: _Demon._

Okumura sheathed the sword in a flash of movement, threw it away like it had burned him, turning wide eyes to Ryuji and the other exwires. His ears had shortened again and the flames were gone, but the damage was done. He was wearing the body of a friend but all that Ryuji could see was the fire, etched deep in his mind. Okumura moved towards him, and without thinking, Ryuji tightened his grip on the pistol, finger jerking over the trigger.

The look on Okumura's face was utterly heartbroken.

But all Ryuji could see was Konekomaru crying over a twin pair of graves, his grandfather's name on a slate, thousands of voices roaring in his ears of ' _cursed temple'_ and ' _exorcists dead, killed, murdered, slaughtered'._ He was running on instinct, and every instinct in his body told him that whatever that thing was, it was dangerous.

"Ahh, so the reports were right! Blue fire!"

Suddenly, there was another voice speaking, and for half a second, Ryuji almost though Mr. Fujimoto had somehow failed, and now the demon king was come to kill them all. But the person who stepped into the light of their campsite was shockingly normal looking, if not... visibly dirty. The man was wearing an odd poncho, and had black hair that covered his eyes but didn't hide the excitement in his expression when he looked over at their class.

"Oh, students!" The man said, much to the visible chagrin of the tall, blonde man next to him. "Hello, hello! I'm Lewin Light, but you can call me Lightning, and the other guy here is-"

"Arthur Auguste Angel," The man- Angel -interrupted impatiently, eyes narrowed. "Where are the Satan spawn?"

Ryuji couldn't help the way his eyes darted over to Okumura, just in time to see bright wisps of light slip through the air like snakes and jerk Okumura's arms back behind his back, binding them tightly. There were more exorcists swarming forth from the forest, then, who shoved him to the ground near violently, clasping heavy shackles over his wrists as others trained guns on his prone form. Something in his chest wrenched at the look on Okumura's face then, terrified but resigned at the same time.

But then Lightning was speaking again, voice dripping with fake obliviousness. "Angel, don't you think it's so odd that the bastard kids of Satan slated to be killed by Fujimoto Shiro's hands suddenly turn up as that same man's adopted sons?"

"Is now really the time to be picking the circumstances apart?" Angel's expression was that of thinly veiled disgust. "The Grigori want the thing to be executed."

_Executed?_

There was a quiet buzzing noise, and Angel's hand lifted to his ear. There was more buzzing, and with each second that passed, Angel's expression turned deeper and deeper into disgust and irritation. "Forget what I said. Pheles has apparently convinced them into a _trial._ "

"Even more curious! Now Mephisto Pheles is involving himself? What a dastardly cover up!" Lightning laughed.

Angel wasted no time with that, instead turning to the group. "Kirigakure Shura and Okumura Yukio, you're both being summoned as witnesses. Where is Fujimoto Shiro?"

"Here," Called a guff voice. Ryuji turned to see Mr. Fujimoto, looking ruffled but otherwise unharmed. "Amaimon's already been exorcised. Thanks for showing up late."

Angel's eye twitched. "You're being tried by the Grigori on accounts of treason. The three of you have been summoned to appear immediately."

"And the kids?" Mr. Fujimoto asked, and it was then that Angel finally turned an eye down to them.

"Lewin will escort them to a holding room. Prepare yourselves for the possibility of being summoned as well, and don't fool yourselves into thinking you're any safer than Satan's spawn," His eyes were cold. "If you're suspected to have taken any part in this cover up, you will be punished."

Lightning shivered dramatically, turning a grin towards the exwires. "Harsh, harsh! Well, c'mon, children, off we go!"

It was only on autopilot that Ryuji moved to place the gun in his waistband, the barrel already cool. He looked back down at Moriyama, but the sight of her wide, teary eyes was enough to shock him out of his daze. When had she even woken up?

"...are you okay?" He forced himself to ask. She squeezed her eyes shut, swallowed harshly, but nodded. "I'm gonna pick you up again."

He knelt down on the ground, and with her assistance, managed to get his arms under her legs and back, hefting her up. She curled her arms around his neck, and if his shirt was wet under where her face rested, he pretended not to notice. Miss Kirigakure and Okumura-sensei were already gone, alongside Angel and Okumura himself. All that remained was Lightning, hands clasped behind his back as he waited patiently for the exwires to drag themselves along. He vaguely registered Konekomaru coming to stand at his side, small hand clutching Ryuji's shirt tightly. Shima was at his side, wisely silent for once, and Kamiki stood with Paku by her side.

"Everyone ready to go?" Lightning asked, and at their silence, whirled around to face the academy. "Sheesh! Kids are tough, I never know how to deal with you all."

There was nothing he could think to say to that, and apparently the other exwires shared the same sentiment. There was a tense silence spread over the group as they walked through the dark forest, their path lit up only by the small faeries Lightning called forth from a lighter. At any other time, Ryuji would have been enthralled by how the man seemed to be able to summon demons with only a word. As for now? The shock induced numbness was starting to fade away, and now he didn't know what to feel.

Okumura Rin and Yukio were apparently demons. If Lightning was to be believed, they were the sons of Satan, as well. Okumura Rin had the signature blue flames of Satan, the same flames that destroyed his temple's name, killed his grandfather, Konekomaru's parents, Shima's eldest brother and thousands of exorcists across the world. And they had been right next to them the entire time, during their classes, during their lunch periods, in training exercises- at any point in time, they could've been killed, slaughtered just like all the other victims of the Blue Night.

"So~" Lightning interrupted the silence, voice cheery. "One of your classmates turns out to be the son of Satan! Man, how many people can say that? What a shocker, right?"

"Could you just cut to the chase and say what you mean?" Kamiki snapped, crossing her arms. "What do you want us to tell you, we're shocked? Scared?"

Lightning laughed again, but something in the air changed, became more charged. Ryuji's stomach dropped. "I want you all to tell me that you're not traitors to the Order. How about we start there, yeah?"

"...we didn't know," Konekomaru said eventually, quietly. "Someone like that was really hiding in our program? He could've killed us."

"Oh please, Okumura?" Kamiki asked, derisive. "Don't make me laugh. That guy screams 'bleeding heart', I seriously doubt he would've hurt anyone. And he _saved_ us, remember? That goblin was about to kill us all."

"You're defending him?" Ryuji couldn't help but ask. Kamiki had been nothing but sour the entire year, and now she was defending Okumura?

"And you're not?" Her retort was razor sharp, her eyes disdainful. "Guys like you piss me off the most. You always talked such big game about making Okumura your friend, and like the coward you are, now you're backing out of all of that just because you know who the guy's dad is! You really do make me sick, y'know!"

Ryuji narrowed his eyes, anger sparking up hot in his chest. But before he could say anything, Lightning cut in, turning a dangerously curious glance towards Kamiki. "His dad isn't just some nobody, he's the demon King and God of Gehenna. Are you his girlfriend, or something?"

Kamiki flushed bright red, but her posture stayed tense and defensive. "Of course not! All I'm saying is, half demon exorcists really aren't all that uncommon! They make some of the best exorcists, and even if his dad is Satan, he's never done anything to hurt us or anyone else. It's pretty _cowardly_ to condemn him before he's even _done_ anything bad."

"Ahh, and in a perfect world, that might be true!" Lightning mused, and talked as if he didn't really believe the words that came out of his mouth. "But the spawn of Satan are an affront to everything we stand for, after all~! We can't allow something like that to keep living, it could turn on us and kill us all!"

"And when he does, then I'll be scared of him," Kamiki asserted, completely unyielding.

Ryuji scowled at her. "So you never had a family member killed by the Blue Night."

"Huh? Is that-"

"Satan destroyed our temple!" He snapped, and it was difficult to keep his grip light on Moriyama in his arms when Kamiki looked at him like that. She had always been stuck up, but this was too far. "He killed Koneko's parents, Shima's brother, and dozens of our monks, and that was just _our_ temple! You expect us to just brush that shit aside?!"

"No, I expect you to be like any other rational human being and _differentiate!_ " She fired back. "Just admit it! You're too wimpy to keep up with your stupid delusion of defeating Satan, so now you're going after Okumura as the next best thing!"

It was only Moriyama in his grip that kept him from getting violent. "The fuck do you know! Why do ya think tearin' other people own all the time makes you better?!"

"He's right," Paku spoke up, but her gaze was steadfast on the ground. "You're going too far, Izu-"

"What, because he's hurt, he's suddenly incapable of doing wrong?!" She shouted straight over Paku, eyes ablaze. "Newsflash, people don't get to choose their parents! Just because your dad is shit, doesn't mean you are!"

"So that's what this is, huh?" A cold sort of anger washed over him. "You got daddy issues."

He expected her to get angry, to yell and snap at him and probably throw a punch. But instead, her face fell, and he only caught a glimpse of something raw and hurt before she snapped her head back forward and away from him.

"Whatever," Was the only thing she said.

Ryuji was stunned for a long second, and Shima let out a low whistle behind him. "That was cold, Bon."

He merely scowled and looked back down, and soon the only noise was Lightning whistling to himself in front of them. When he spoke again, it was quiet, frustrated. "...so you're on her side, too."

"It's not about sides, Bon, you were just being a dick," Shima said simply, shrugging. Ryuji's eyes widened as he looked back at the pink haired monk Shima was looking steadfastly ahead, posture relaxed but something unrecognizable in his eyes. "Besides, he's still the same guy, right? Just... a little more dangerous, I guess. but there are worse things out there. Least this one is on our side."

"Shima, how can you say that?" Konekomaru asked, voice tight. "He could've turned on us, any time!"

"Well, I guess you'll never have to find out!" Lightning chipped in, as the train station came into view. "He'll surely be put to death before the night is up, which I'm sure will be a relief to you all, of course!"

Was it a relief? Did he really want Okumura dead? His mind flashed through afternoons working on assignments, a late talk under a street lamp, the rooftops and breakfast in a kitchen, and he realized that no, he didn't want Okumura dead. But something like this? The guy was the son of Satan, the half demon kid of the God of Gehenna, and that wasn't just something he could... push past. He could forgive other secrets, but this was too much. 

He thought back on every time he’d smiled at Okumura, shared his food, helped him study, helped him train- and the entire time, Okumura was hiding the fact that he was the son of the demon that devastated Ryuji’s temple?

How could he forgive that?

* * *

"Mephisto Pheles and Fujimoto Shiro, you are both being charged with high treason and conspiring with Satan against the order. How do you plead?"

"Why, not guilty, of course!" Mephisto crowed, flourishing a his hands dramatically as he and Shiro stood before the Grigori, in a room filled with whatever exorcists could be called to the trial. Cold eyes looked down at them, at the demon child chained to the floor, at the woman standing beside the free-standing twin, the paladin who stood blank-faced. "And if you would be so kind as to allow me to explain, I would make the argument that these two children's lives were spared in the effort of protecting the Order!"

The Grigori stood in the balcony above the room, and none showed a visible reaction to Mephisto's words. It was the woman who spoke, "Proceed, Pheles, and pray your story is good."

Mephisto grinned. What a riot, humans were. Time and time again, they proved to be far superior entertainment to the demons of Gehenna. "Very well!"

Let the show begin.


	9. a story, a set of twins, and a bargain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm sorry to get this chapter to you all so late, this weekend has been pretty busy for me ;u; I just moved into my college dorm this past weekend, and things are just going to be kind of hectic these next couple of weeks unfortunately.
> 
> I hope you're all doing well! And here I bring another chapter for you to read!
> 
> chapter warnings: brief mentions of execution and experimentation (no details, just the mention), alcohol mention, character has somewhat of a dissociative episode

"Our fantastic story begins in a snowy wasteland, with a dying mother fleeing persecution and an old friend sent to hunt her down..."

"Pheles," One of the Grigori intervened. "Is this necessary? You, along with Fujimoto, are being accused of treason. Do you really believe yourself to be in the position for dramatics?"

"All in due time, my good friends, all in due time!" Mephisto soothed, grin damn near predatory.

The demon had everyone exactly where he wanted them, and Shiro would just have to accept that they were trapped here until then, he thought with gritted teeth. He was so stupid for not seeing it earlier. This was exactly what Mephisto wanted, for Rin to reveal himself. He'd been stupid to think that the deal would stop the demon king from interfering. Just because Mephisto couldn't step in, didn't mean that he couldn't order other people to- Amaimon, in this case.

He'd played right into Mephisto's hands and didn't even realize it, and the uncomfortable tingle of the contract symbol on his palm reminded him that this was Mephisto's game now. He'd given away his ability to fix this.

God, he was such an idiot.

"Now! As I was saying, our journey begins with a dying mother and two twins! Both of which are born of Satan and his chosen, well... body."

That was going into territories that this court didn't need to be involved in, and he let Mephisto know that with a sharp jab of his elbow into the demon king's ribs. Mephisto snickered beneath his breath, which only made Shiro more irritated. This was his son's life on the line, both of his sons, and the damn demon thought this was a joke! But Mephisto only smiled, launched into his tale as if it was the other day's news. He knew he had Shiro cornered, and as much as he hated it, there wasn't anything he could do here but damage control.

"One of these twins was born human, with no otherworldly powers to speak of, and no defining demonic marks. The only characteristic that separates this child from others is his mashou from birth, but this boy was incredibly dedicated and devoted to the teachings of exorcists, and grew up to be the youngest exorcist we have on record!

"This boy is Okumura Yukio, of course. Middle first class exorcist and Demon Pharmaceuticals teacher, this boy is the very definition of everything that True Cross stands for," Mephisto regaled them, and Shiro resisted the urge to look down at his youngest son. He couldn't afford to draw attention to them, to give the Grigori a bond to use to tear all three of them apart. They had done so before, and he had no doubt that they would do so again.

The one who spoke looked clearly unimpressed with Mephisto's tale, "And? Of the second twin?"

"That boy," Mephisto started, and Shiro felt a sense of unease crawl up his spine at his tone. "Was born Satan's son, through and through. None of the demon kings born of demons ever inherited the divine blue flames, but this twin was born utterly wreathed in them. However, his power could be tamed, and of course, my own magnificent self was able to execute the harrowing spell to put them away inside of the Koma sword, the Kurikara!"

"But that sword was meant to execute the two twins," The Grigori to the left interrupted, distinctly male sounding. Shiro couldn't bother to learn their names if he tried. "In fact, Fujimoto himself was ordered to execute the children. Do you admit to interfering in a direct order from ourselves?"

Mephisto held his hands up. "Only in your best interest, of course!"

"And that interest would be?"

"That the demon twins are far more useful to you alive than dead, I say," He continued. "Particularly the eldest, Okumura Rin, heir apparent to the throne of Gehenna."

"More reason to have him executed now!" The more feminine sounding voice demanded.

"More reason to have him _pardoned_ now!" God above give him strength, what had made him believe that Mephisto acting as their lawyer would turn out well? A demon who thrived on chaos and had nothing to lose here? "What other opportunity would you ever have to see Satan's own strengths and weaknesses under your own watchful eye? For the first time in history, humans have the ability to analyze the devil's own trademark, and develop a counter strategy. Would you really give this up so easily?"

"A counter strategy?" The feminine one scoffed. "If this boy is so imperative to developing a counter strategy, why not just explore solutions through clinical trials? Dragulesc would certainly be ecstatic to do so."

Shiro tensed, but Mephisto was swooping in already. "And give up such a potent weapon? No force in Assiah has ever been born with as much raw strength and potential, and no force will ever surpass that of Satan's son weaponized."

"Fujimoto," The male one spoke up, suddenly. "Does Pheles speak for you?"

Shiro hesitated, then nodded, reluctant. "In a loose sense."

"Then this points not only to treason, but to conspiracy, as well," He said, frowning.

"Conspiracy?" Mephisto echoed, offended. "My comrades, have I not worked by your side for hundreds of years? I've served this organization longer than anyone in this room!"

"And we are well aware that you do so at your own behest," The older Grigori spoke. "We are not fools to assume that you don't have your own reasons in doing so."

"Then allow me a few words of comfort for you; my own goals ride on the existence and success of True Cross as a whole," Mephisto held a hand to his chest, the other in the air. "Scout's honor!"

Shiro could have strangled him.

It was only by God's grace that his hands stayed at his sides, but they still twitched near violently.

"As for Fujimoto himself, what other exorcist could be more loyal? He has served this organization since his conception-" Shiro barely resisted the urge to glare at him. "-and besides disobeying one order on my request, has the most admirable record of any soldier under True Cross. If he should be questioned, it should be because of my own actions, of course~!"

Shiro glanced at him- since when had the demon king cared about saving his ass? But Mephisto was merely smiling lazily at the Grigori, the exact picture of someone who was _exactly_ where they wanted to be. It was probably just that he had some purpose left to serve for the demon king, and wasn't that an ominous thought to consider?

"And the boy?" The female Grigori questioned, but he could tell by her tone that she wasn't entirely convinced. "How can we be sure of his loyalty?"

"Just ask him!" Mephisto replied, and threw a hand out behind them, to where Rin was on his knees, chained to the floor. Shiro resisted the urge to look at his son, kept his gaze straight ahead. He wouldn't give the Grigori a weakness to pick apart. "Well, Rin? Who are you loyal to, hmm?"

There was a moment of silence, before Rin's voice spoke up, quiet and hoarse but steady. "Fujimoto Shiro's the only dad I care about. I'd rather die than work for that- the other one."

"And you will die," The male Grigori interjected. "If we ever have reason to suspect your loyalty lies elsewhere, or that you work in the interest of Gehenna, then there will be no trial. You _will_ be executed whenever an exorcist is able to do so."

Wait.

Were they seriously going to give Rin a chance? Morbid threats aside, they had spoken about the execution in future tense. Were they really going to give Rin a chance at being an exorcist? It seemed almost too good to be true. The Vatican was an opportunistic organization, there had to be some sort of catch somewhere.

"I get it," His son said.

"Then you would be willing to enter a contract on it?"

And there it was.

"No," Shiro said immediately, and even as the eyes in the room suddenly turned to him, he looked only to the Grigori, steel in his gaze. "He's a child!"

"He's the son of Satan!" The female one retorted.

"He's a teenager!" Shiro scowled. "How can you expect anyone his age to watch their damn mouths?"

"Then one will be implemented that can be controlled on demand," The male Grigori's cold gaze could be felt even behind his decorative clothing. "We are placing a great deal of trust in both yourself and Mephisto Pheles by allowing this boy to live, but if the conditions are _disagreeable_ to you, then perhaps the easiest route would just be execution."

"I'll do it!" Rin called out, and Shiro wanted both to hug and bash him up the head. "I'll take the contract."

"Very well then. Let it be known that Okumura Rin, son of Satan, will continue his studies as a student of True Cross. He is to remain under supervision at all times, and we will reconvene again following this year's certification exam to deem his success or failure in proving his worth."

"By what measure, pray tell?" Mephisto asked, and Shiro wanted to punch him. He'd thought that they were getting a break, but with each word the Grigori spoke, he realized they were just trading a grave for a trench to pull themselves out of.

"By measure of earning his certification and attaining an exorcist meister, as well as an assessment of his competence in utilizing the flames. If he fails in either of these fields or violates the contract he is to enter, he is to be executed without question. Is that understood?"

Mephisto nodded, smiling, and Shiro reluctantly did so as well. The restrictions were stifling, and completely unrealistic. A 16 year old child, with absolutely no training before this school year, in exorcism or in his own powers, passing the exam in only six months time? It seemed near impossible for him- even Yukio had more time to prepare. They were setting Rin up for failure, and he knew it; they all knew it. The Vatican had always been close minded, always been narrow-visioned. They were an organization dedicated to defeating demons and winning the war against Satan, and he knew exactly how far they were willing to go.

Killing a child for the crime of being born wouldn't even be a drop in the ocean of what they were willing to do, but was this really a much bigger upgrade?

"You have six months time, Pheles," The female Grigori called. "Use it well. Once the contract has been executed by Lewin, you're dismissed. Given that the demon king Amaimon has been exorcised already, we will be calling eye witnesses in to receive their reports. Prepare your students to be interrogated, if need be, and for God's sake, fix those damn wards!"

"You wound me!" Mephisto cried. "I am not invincible! My one moment of weakness, being used against me! Cruelty!"

She visibly scowled and stood from her seat, anger in her posture. "Begone, you pest!"

"Alright, alright!"

He knew a dismissal when he saw one, and didn't wait a moment longer to step off the pedestal and away from Mephisto. Shiro didn't think he could tolerate a moment more at his side, and as if to irritate him more, Mephisto disappeared with a laugh and a puff of pink smoke that stung his nose.

Shrugging it off, Shiro looked up towards where Rin had been left, in time to see the group of exorcists around him- including Angel himself -reluctantly releasing Rin from his chains. He resisted the instinct to wince at the dark red marks that had been worn into his eldest son's neck, wrists and ankles, but they were beginning to heal over before his very eyes. Rin rubbed at his neck, eyes unfocused and staring off into space somewhere, and as Shiro came to stand before him, Shura and Yukio did as well.

Yukio's expression was very thinly veiled by a layer of calm, but his eyes betrayed him, as did the way his hands shook by his side. Shura, however, was unreadable, but as a sinking sense of acceptance and exhaustion settled over him, he knew why her eyes were blank when she looked at him. He knew from the beginning that Shura would take his secrecy personally. He knew it would blow up in his face, but it still felt like a blow to his chest.

He didn't say a word, and as Rin stood, he let himself have a brief moment of weakness and dragged both his sons and Shura into a bruising hug. It was a mistake. He would regret this later, this show of favoritism, of weakness, and it would come back to bite him in the ass later. He knew that. But right now, they were alive, and for the immediate future, they were safe.

It was Rin who relaxed first, then Yukio, and a long moment later, Shura as well- though barely, if any.

But before either of them could speak a word, there was the sound of shuffling footsteps over the background murmur of the court clearing, and Shiro could smell Lewin before he even saw the man.

"We can talk later," He murmured, then let them go and straightened up, turning bored eyes to the newcomer. "Lightning."

"Ah, Mr. Fujimoto!" Lewin grinned. "I'm finally seeing you in person~!"

"You say that every time, and I'm still not any less suspicious of your ass kissing," He replied, trying to fight back his annoyance. No use in making more enemies than he already had. "Where have you been off to lately?"

"Oh, you know, here and there," Lewin hummed, and reached out for Rin's arm. His eldest son hesitantly held his arm out, as Lewin reached over to pull up his sleeve and lay a hand on his bicep. He murmured something in Latin, quietly. Rin hissed aloud as a symbol burned itself into his arm, but after a few seconds, it glowed, then faded from view. The skin of his arm was smooth and unmarred again. "...and the rest is omitted. I just go wherever I'm needed, as always! Investigating, rooting out traitors, etcetera etcetera. I never would have suspected our own paladin, however! What a shocker!"

Shiro fought back a grimace. Lewin was relentless at the best of times. "It was in the Order's best interest."

"Oh no, you don't have to convince me, Mr. Fujimoto. I agree with you, what an opportunity! Satan's own kin, in our hands," Lewin's grin turned sharp. "Much better alive than dead."

Shiro's stomach twisted. First Dragulesc, and now Lewin as well? "...yeah."

"Well, that's all I'm needed for!" Lewin chirped. "I'll be on my way, we should work together again some time! You too, little Okumura! I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot more of each other, hehe."

Shiro shifted more in front of his boys, forcing his expression into neutrality. "See you, then."

Lewin laughed, but backed off. "Bye!"

Shiro watched Lewin's back warily as the arc knight made his way back over to Angel, and as they left, the four of them were the only ones in the courtroom, save for a few scattered exorcists.

"Dad?" Rin called, and he turned back to face the other three.

There were too many things to say, too many things to talk about, too many things to clear up, and the sheer magnitude of it was abruptly starting to overwhelm him. He was only one man, and he was starting to think that he had taken on much more than he could carry.

It felt like a physical weight, one that only intensified as he rubbed at his chest. Yukio looked up at him, concerned.

"It's... been a long day," Was all Shiro said, and he knew by the look on Yukio's face that his excuse wasn't good enough. He knew he should address it more seriously, but he was, well... exhausted, honestly, and his day still wasn't over. He looked to Shura, whose eyes were still frustratingly blank. "Would you take 'em back to the dorms? I'll go talk to the exwires and send 'em home."

"Sure," She said, tonelessly, and as she turned on her heel to leave the courtroom, both Yukio and Rin reluctantly followed her.

Shiro stood, alone, for a second, and just let his shoulders slump.

Yuri would have been better at this.

She would've been better at a lot of things.

(Not for the first time, and certainly not for the last, he wished she had been allowed to live. He would have gladly traded his own life so she could be here, instead of him. She was the one who wanted to have the perfect family, wanted to raise her sons, wanted to live life to the fullest. She was the one who saw the best in others, the one who always found the bright side in everything.)

Shiro sighed, and closed his eyes. No use thinking about it now. He'd just have to live with his mistakes, same as always. Even if those mistakes seemed to be piling up more and more.

He could think about them later. Right now, he was busy.

* * *

Ryuji wasn't sure who exactly he expected to be walking in the doors, but he figured the paladin was probably somewhere in that list of people.

"Hey, kiddos," Mr. Fujimoto greeted, but it was clear that the energy behind his grin was fake.

Fake or not, the mood of the nurse's office that they crammed themselves in was somber, tense, and quiet, and as Mr. Fujimoto sat himself in the nurse's chair that Konekomaru offered up, his grin faded. Konekomaru sat himself by Ryuji's side, and instinct had him moving his arm so that his friend could lean up against his side. Then, he was still, and the room fell into quiet again.

"Well," Mr. Fujimoto started. "I'm sure you kids have questions."

Damn right, he had questions.

...but as he went to open his mouth, he found it suddenly dry, and his mind blank. _You always talked such big game about making Okumura your friend, and like the coward you are, now you're backing out of all of that just because you know who the guy's dad is!_

It was more than that. It was more than just his dad, even though his father was a hurdle that Ryuji just... couldn't cross. It was a lack of trust, a total lack of visibility between them- right?

Right?

"How could Satan even have half human kids?" Kamiki asked, eventually, expression vaguely annoyed as always. "All his other kids are demon kings, what makes Rin and Okumura-sensei different? And how did you end up with them? Why are they here, instead of Gehenna?"

Mr. Fujimoto reached a hand up to rub at his jaw, leaning back against the nurse's desk. "There's a lot of that I can't answer, I'll let you know in advance."

"Then what can you answer?" Kamiki pressed.

"Spitfire," Mr. Fujimoto chuckled, and even as Kamiki flushed in embarrassment, she refused to back down. "Well, I can tell you that Rin and Yukio are both half demons, born from Satan and a... human mother. Yukio was born practically human, though. Rin was the one to inherit all of the power. That's why they're not demon kings- the kings are all full demons, that we know, and they're only half."

"How did you end up their dad?" Paku asked, quiet, from where she sat on the padded examination table with Kamiki.

"Most of that is classified, but I adopted them after their mother died," Mr. Fujimoto said, and looked uncomfortable enough that Ryuji wished they would both just drop the damn questions. Sure, he didn't have the nerve to ask his own right now, but it was better than enduring this stupid awkwardness.

Thankfully, Konekomaru shifted a bit, and spoke. "Are they dangerous?"

"Yukio is no more dangerous than any other exorcist you all will meet. He doesn't have the flames, if that's what you mean," Mr. Fujimoto answered, and turned an odd look towards his small friend. "Rin is, well, more complicated. He's always struggled with his strength, and his temper. He's emotional and immature, and cares a lot about-"

"Let me guess, everything?" Kamiki added dryly. "He wasn't fooling me with that tough guy act of his."

"That was a recent development," Mr. Fujimoto agreed, and Ryuji was confused by the little grin they both seemed to share. Since when had Kamiki cared at all about anyone other than Paku? "He's a sweet boy. He loves his brother, and his family. A lot of kids get the wrong idea about him since he has such a short fuse, or because his demonic traits stick out sometimes. As for dangerous, I'd be lying if I said he wasn't. He doesn't know how to control himself or his power, and that makes him dangerous. But if he can learn how to control himself, he'll be the strongest exorcist that True Cross has ever put out."

Ryuji tensed. _He'll surely be put to death before the night is up,_ echoed in his ears _._ "Does that mean they aren't killin' him?"

Mr. Fujimoto raised an eyebrow, but answered him anyways. "The Grigori decided against execution, for now. If he passes the exorcist exam, then he'll be safe."

"And if he doesn't, they'll kill him?" Moriyama asked, eyes wide and face pale.

"That can't be true, right?" Shima laughed nervously. "That exam's in like, a few months, right? There's no way he can actually pass it."

"He'll have to," Mr. Fujimoto sighed.

"That's hardly fair!"

"Rin isn't a person to them," Mr. Fujimoto cut in, voice sharp. "He's the son of Satan, he's worse than just a demon in their eyes. He won't ever get 'fair'."

Kamiki scowled. "That's stupid."

"That's _life._ "

Ryuji found himself looking up at their paladin, at the tightness of his shoulders, the deep lines in his face. Mr. Fujimoto looked tired and worn down, more so now than he'd ever seen before. He felt like he was looking at his own father, that resigned yet accepting look on his face as he announced their annexation into True Cross.

"Is he going to be back in classes with us?" Konekomaru asked Mr. Fujimoto.

"To an extent, yes and no. His regular classes, yes, but as for the Cram school... he'll probably be tutored more privately. There's no penalty for you kids failing the exam, but that's not an option for him."

"What about missions?"

"Likely. From now on, you all will start going on missions with and without each other, to develop individual skills. It'll depend, but like I said, it's likely."

Konekomaru sighed quietly, and slumped a bit harder against Ryuji's side. "That's good."

"If you have no more questions," Mr. Fujimoto stood up with a groan, his knees popping. "Ouch- then you kids are good to go back to your dorms. Get some sleep, you'll probably get called in for questioning about what happened today. Be honest, yeah? These guys can sniff out lies like a bloodhound, save yourself the trouble."

* * *

Yukio knew the concept of time freezing in place was ridiculous, and that the world wouldn't stop for just one person. Time was a concept that cared for no one, and even in the worst of times, would carry on, regardless of if silly humans wanted it to stop or not. Even so, he thought that if time were to stop for anything, then this certainly seemed like a good reason.

Shura had been dead silent the entire walk back to the dorms, as had Rin, and Yukio did not have the energy to try to make some sort of conversation. Even if he had, what could he say that wouldn't be incredibly stupid? No, he had stayed quiet, and when they had reached the dorms, he waited the cursory few minutes to see if Rin would be the one to breach the topic. His twin brother had gone straight to his own room, however, with hardly even a glance thrown backwards. Yukio had found himself alone by the door, staring down at the carpet as if the fabric held all the answers in the world.

Should he have cried? Was that the normal thing to do in this situation? Cry, call a friend, talk things out, maybe even go back to see his dad? He should have been panicked, or upset, or angry, or _something_ , but all he felt was numb. Like he was frozen in time, even as the clock kept ticking. Even when he went to bed, sleep evaded him. He spent the whole night staring up at the ceiling.

And in the morning, life kept moving.

His phone buzzed with a mission assignment, and like his body was moving on its own, he went through the motions. Brushed his teeth, got dressed, got on the subway and went to work. He exorcised demons, went to Moriyama's shop, filed mission reports, until it was time to go back to classes. It was back to business as normal- classes, cram school, training his students, missions.

He didn't see their dad until almost a full week later.

"Yukio! Hey, slow down, kiddo," Shiro had managed to corner him on the way to the cram classes, and for a second, surprise broke through the grey mist that seemed to settle over his shoulders. His dad didn't bother with a smile, just reached a hand out to squeeze his shoulder wordlessly. His dad's face was tired, his shoulders tense, and for a second, Yukio felt incredibly stupid.

What was wrong with him? A week ago, it seemed like the only thing he could think about was how Shiro and Rin were, what, excluding him? Just because they were sitting together in the kitchen and having conversations without him? How stupid of him. His father was busy, rundown and overwhelmed, and he had been wasting time feeling _left out._

He wasn't a kid anymore. He was an exorcist, a teacher, and he'd been wasting time acting like a child and leaving everything for Shiro to deal with. He couldn't keep doing that anymore.

"Yukio?" His father shook his shoulder lightly, concern peeking through the tiredness. "What's going on?"

"Oh, nothing," Yukio forced his lips into a smile. He couldn't keep making Shiro worry about him like this, his father had more important things to do. "I was just wondering what would be a good assignment for the students next, that's all."

Shiro nodded, and thankfully, didn't question him any further. "How's your brother?"

Yukio blinked, and suddenly realized that he'd barely seen Rin through the past few days. Sure, he'd seen his brother in their dorm, but as for what Rin had been doing, he... didn't know. He couldn't tell their father that, though. "He's fine. Lazy, as always."

"Small blessings," Shiro chuckled. An exorcist passed by them in the hallway, and instinctively, they quieted. Shiro was the first to realize that they didn't need to worry about not talking about Rin, and continued. "We'll need to start training him to use his flames. I'll see when I can get a break from missions, but they've been busting my ass nonstop."

Of course, they were testing his loyalty and keeping him out of the public eye. Yukio nodded. "I can start with him."

"Are you sure?" His dad raised an eyebrow. At Yukio's frown, he held his hands up defensively, chuckling a bit. "Alright, alright, I'll leave it to you. Just get him practicing calling them up on command, and we'll go from there." Yukio nodded again, and Shiro released his hold to pat his shoulder. "I gotta get going then. I'll come see you both later, alright?"

"Sure," He said, and as Shiro turned to leave, so did he. He did still have a class to teach, after all.

A class that went by as normal, if only quieter than previous weeks. There was no more bickering between Suguro and Rin, and even Shima had taken the hint and stopped hiding porn magazines behind his textbooks. He still remembered how he'd had to lie to his father about Rin earlier, and idly noted to himself that he should probably start watching Rin more. His brother had changed seats, unsurprisingly, away from Shiemi and the rest of the exorcists. Kamiki, however, had taken it upon herself to pointedly sit directly behind Rin, along with Paku. There was a visible sort of tension between the two sides of the room. Kamiki, Rin and Paku on one; Suguro, Miwa, Shima, and Moriyama on the other.

God save him if this turned back into the divided class duel it had been at the beginning of the year. He didn't enough patience to sort out another immature fight.

And as he glanced at Rin, that patience burned to ash.

His brother wasn't even paying attention.

"Rin!" He snapped, and his twin looked up from where he'd been picking at the pages of his book, startled. "Please pay attention to the lesson, and stop destroying your textbook."

Rin, wide-eyed, had only nodded. As he continued on with the lesson, his irritation faded away, and a voice at the back of his head wondered if he should apologize. He frowned at that. Sure, he had been a little snippy, but it was for good reason. There were only a few months until the exam and if they were going to keep Rin alive, then his brother needed to put a lot more effort into his classwork than he already was. Especially since they were going to have to find some way to convince Shura to pick up training Rin again.

"Are ya fuckin' crazy?" The full facility of training exorcists didn't seem to deter Shura's anger at all, even as several people gave them wary looks. Rin was standing stiffly behind him, but Yukio was too focused on the task before him to pay attention to his brother's discomfort. "I only agreed to train him as a _favor_ , what makes ya think I wanna be anywhere near any of y'all now that I know?"

"You can't seriously expect me to believe that's why you're backing out now," Yukio sighed, rubbing at his eyes. Shura had a demon blade, for Christ's sake, and Shiro did say she was practically raised by demons.

Shura frowned and crossed her arms. "And what if it is? Who says I wanna get involved in yer little freak show over there, huh?"

"Because our dad saved you from being stolen off by demons when you were a kid, and you want to pay him back?"

Her eyes turned dangerous. "If you wanna get anywhere with this, ya better drop this schtick about yer dad real quick."

Yukio felt his eye twitch. "One pack of beer for every lesson. You choose."

"For sword fightin', that might be enough," Shura scoffed, cocking her hip to the side. "But I'm guessin' you want help with his demon shit, huh? I want vodka."

"Burnett's."

"Grey Goose."

"Belvedere. Final offer," He had dozens of arguments between Shura and their dad to thank for his alcohol knowledge.

She squinted at him, and he kept his face blank. "...I want dinner, too. Tell yer dad to put all that shit on his tab."

So that was what it was, huh? She had a bone to pick with their dad. He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Fine."

"It's a deal, then," Shura said, and turned a critical eye behind him- towards Rin, probably. "Tuesdays and thursdays after yer cram classes, come find me here, got it?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Good. Now scram."

God, she didn't have to ask him twice. Yukio turned on his heel and walked past his brother, entirely too eager to leave Shura's company. Rin followed behind him, near silent as usual, and for once, Yukio was grateful that Rin wasn't as talkative as he used to be. It gave him more time and room to figure out how to tell their dad that Shura had made it her personal mission to drain Shiro's wallet, at any costs.

He followed the route back to their dorm on autopilot, so lost in thought that he barely even realized his brother was speaking. He stopped and turned to face Rin, saw his brother's concerned eyes reflecting the light of the street lamps. When had it gotten so dark out?

"...Yukio?" Rin's voice cut in again, and Yukio looked down from the sky back to him. "Are you okay? You've been... I don't know, edgy all day."

"I'm fine," He said, purely on instinct. Rin raised an eyebrow, clearly not believing him. Yukio sighed to himself again, and reached up to pull his glasses down, rubbing his eyes before putting his glasses back on again. If anyone should understand what he was feeling, it would be Rin, right? "I'm just... stressed, I guess. I'm sorry. There's been a lot going."

Rin only smiled, reached a hand out to poke Yukio's stomach. "Don't worry so much, you'll give yourself an ulcer!"

"Worry...?" Yukio blinked, then his eyebrows furrowed. "Are you seriously not bothered by any of this?"

"I mean, I guess?" Rin looked like he was about to say something else, but shook his head, and stopped.

Seriously? He had an execution hanging over his head, and everything that they'd been working for a decade to keep hidden was falling all around them! And Rin wasn't even worried about any of it? Yukio's frown deepened. "How can you say that, Rin? If you don't pass this exam, you'll die! You're not even a little concerned about this?"

"If I pass, then I pass. If not, then I won't," His brother shrugged, and frustration welled up in Yukio's chest. "Hey, don't get so wound up, okay? It'll be fine."

Yukio gritted his teeth and swallowed down the angry words that tried to fight their way out of his mouth. He had thought that the incident with their father's possession had made Rin grow up a bit, gain some maturity, but evidently not. Rin was still the slacker student who thought he could scrape by with failing grades. His brother didn't seem to realize that this exam wasn't just one he could fail and get past! If he failed, then he'd _die_. Game over. No second tries.

He couldn't believe he had actually entertained the idea that Rin would be mature enough to understand this, to understand the weight Yukio could feel settling on his shoulders. Rin was still the goofy high school drop out who had no plans for the future beyond what was right in front of him.

"Yukio?"

Startled from his thoughts, Yukio blinked. Rin was still looking at him, still concerned- but about entirely the wrong thing. He breathed out through his nose and turned back to the sidewalk, continuing on their walk back to the dorms.

Rin, thankfully, didn't press him further.


	10. a train ride, an appointment, and a long lost lover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Back again w/ another chapter, I hope u all enjoy!

No amount of whiskey was going to make this shit worth it.

Shura glared at the class of exwires before her on the bus, and honestly didn't give two shits about the dirty looks Yukio was giving her for it. The stupid chicken could stick it up his ass, she had _plenty_ of reason to be irritated right now. She knew she was supposed to be one of Rin's guardians, or whatever (which she had tried to weasel out of, unsuccessfully), and agreeing to train the kid was something she had brought on herself, but being shoved into a teacher position for a bunch of snot nosed brats? And she had to go on missions with them, too! Lewin had been able to get out of going on missions with them, but noooo, she just had to be dragged along!

She couldn't pin this particular situation on Shiro, but God, she wanted to.

(She wanted to pin all the things she was angry about on him, right now.)

"...and on the topic, all of you have been assigned a group mission," Yukio's voice grated against her ears, and as she leaned against the back of the seat, she let out an exaggerated, bored sigh. His eye visibly twitched, but he kept on with his explanation. Crap, he was getting too good at ignoring her these days. "The mission is located in the sand dunes of the Tottori prefecture. Locals have spotted will o wisps in the desert at night that lead tourists to areas of quicksand, and your task is to find and exorcise them.

"As you all know, will o wisps are one of the known kin to the Demon King Iblis, and as such have a recorded weakness to water..."

Ugh, did he always have to be so long winded? It was simple enough to understand. Find the little fireballs, exorcise them, and then go home. Tottori was hot and dry as hell, and she was _not_ looking forward to having to sweat her ass off so these stupid dinky kids could fumble their way around an exorcism.

" _-Miss Kirigakure and I_ ," Yukio's voice cut in sharply, throwing a pointed look at her. Shura resisted the urge to throw him the bird. "Will be there as your instructors, but we will not be assisting you in the exorcism unless absolutely necessary. You will have to use your own knowledge and skills to get rid of the will o wisps. I suggest you take the time during this ride to evaluate your individual strengths and weaknesses in relation to this assignment, and begin formulating a plan as to how you'll take on the mission."

Thankfully, he didn't open his mouth to speak anymore, and instead moved to sit back down in his own seat as the subway car set aside for exorcists jolted forward and began moving. Shura breathed out a relieved sigh and plopped down into her own seat next to him, and some of her irritation faded as his visibly increased. 

"So," She started, in spite of the fact that Yukio clearly wanted to be left alone, "You’re ridin' solo on this mission, right?"

"Don't say that like you're not here with me," He muttered, pulling a sheaf of files out of his bag. She peered over at it, but from what she could see, it was just more mission details. Boring. She left her packet at home, of course.

"Yeah, whatever, you know I meant your normal entourage. No Lewin, no Neuhaus, and no Fujimoto?"

"No. Father is busy on his own missions," Yukio said, short.

"Makes sense, I guess," She hummed. "Order wants to keep him on a short leash, huh? Guess that's what happens when ya disobey an order like that."

She could see his jaw tense out of the corner of her eye, and usually, she'd be happy to pick and poke at it until he lost his temper. The mention of Shiro, however, spoiled her fun more than she thought it would. She leaned back and away from him, her own mood souring.

_'Trust me when I say that I'm protecting you.'_

What complete and utter bullshit. Protecting her, by hiding the fact that Rin and Yukio were Satan's bastard children? What the hell was wrong with him? Sure, he'd gotten warmer over the years, but to go so far as to save Satan's kids, and raise them as his own? It didn't seem real, didn't seem like the real Shiro. Why would he do something like that, and more importantly, why didn't he tell her? 

She didn't care about them being half demons, honestly, and even less about them being Satan's offspring. She was strong, smart, and she could keep a secret. She'd been keeping secrets for decades. Not only that, but even if she didn't owe a debt to Shiro, she'd still follow him 'till the ends of the earth. Shura knew she was capable, and trustworthy. Why didn't he?

Why did he suddenly shut her out?

"Miss Kirigakure?"

"What?" She snapped, anger bubbling up. Couldn't these stupid brats leave her to her introspection time, alone?

One of the girls peeked her head around the seat to look at her- Paku, if she remembered any of their names correctly (probably not). Paku looked sheepish, but thankfully just committed to her question instead of chickening out. "I'm, ah, working on some defensive seals? And I was wondering if you wouldn't mind checking over some of my work?"

Shura let out a sigh. She really didn’t want to. "Sure."

She reluctantly stood up, and took the seat next to (Makiki? Kamiki? That was it, right?) the purple haired girl. Paku and Rin were in the seats in the other side of the aisle, while the rest of the Exwires had crammed themselves way back in the back, for some reason. 

Paku had a textbook, ink pens, and multiple pages of paper drawn across her lap, and handed Shura the textbook and the seals she'd already completed. "I'm trying to draw them faster for fights and stuff, but I wanna make sure they're accurate too."

Shura hummed in agreement, and flipped through the pages of the textbook to match the seals up to their official examples. She was good at seals, yes, but mainly storage and offensive seals- she was out of practice with defense ones. 

As she flipped through the pages of the textbook, she came upon a section bookmarked with a grocery store receipt. She raised an eyebrow as she looked at it. "The _anima mea captionem_ seal?"

"Oh, that!" Paku flushed, leaning in towards the textbook. "I was reading about it the other day, and, um, I was wondering why it isn't in common use?"

"Well, because it's pretty much useless for combat. Ya gotta draw it directly on or around your target, and it just ain't functional if ya think about it. The only demons you can get close enough to draw it on are easy to get rid of and don't need it, and the big demons ya need it for are too dangerous to get close to," Shura explained, and Paku's eyes widened in understanding. Even Rin was nodding along, but likely just because he thought it would be on a test, that brat.

There was shifting from behind her, and Shura looked back to see Kamiki pulling an earbud out of her ear. " _Anima mea captionem?_ I've never heard of that."

"Ya wouldn't, like we said, it ain't common," She said, looking back down at the seal. "The translation is literally 'my soul trap'. It's a fancy seal and all, but pretty impractical. It essentially uses the power of a demon to trap it in the area the seal is drawn, and it initially got some excitement 'cuz its power was determined by that of the demon's. Stronger demon, stronger seal. But gettin' those shits to stay in one place is a lot harder than it looks, so it just ended up bein' a bunch of smoke."

Kamiki hummed, and put her earbud back in.

With that done, she looked back down at the other seals, and kept comparing them to the examples in the books. Shura pointed out a couple flaws, corrected a couple of lines, but for the most part, Paku's work was pretty flawless. It wasn't long until she was done and was finally able to make her way back to her seat. Yukio, the lame bummer that he was, was listening to music quietly, too. His eyes were glued to the papers in his lap, and he didn't look up at her even when she dramatically flopped down in her seat. She huffed. Lame.

It was quiet on the subway for a long few minutes, and as she dozed idly in her seat, she entertained the idea of grabbing that nice bottle of Shiro's tequila from her bag. As soon as that idea started forming though, there was the sound of quiet conversation behind her. She was bored enough that eavesdropping on them seemed better than nothing.

"...really not bothered by any of this?" Ah, that was the Paku girl. Her voice was a hushed whisper, like she was trying not to be heard. "You know, the others?

"I..." There was Rin. "There's... no point in getting upset about it, really. I'll be fine."

"It's fine to not be fine, Okumura. They're being really mean, you don't have to be okay with that."

"I guess," Jesus, his awkward deflecting was making her cringe. "Aren't you the same? I mean, doesn't it bother you?"

"Well, honestly... I'm pretty removed from all this exorcism stuff. None of my family members are exorcists, and none of them died in the Blue Night, either. So I guess I'm pretty lucky to be able to say that it doesn't bother me. I don't like Satan, of course, but you're a good guy. I don't think it's fair to judge you just because of your dad."

Shura's eyebrows raised. Damn, she had to give it to the kid, Paku seemed pretty mature for her age.

"...thank you."

"Of course. I can't really tell Suguro and all of them that their feelings are stupid, but, well," Paku snorted out a laugh. "They don't have to act like you have the plague, or something!"

"I think it's pretty funny, honestly," Kamiki's sudden voice startled her- damn, what was the girl so loud for? The subway was practically dead silent! "It just goes to show who's real when it really comes down to the line."

"Kamiki..." Paku sighed, and Shura couldn't help but agree with her resigned tone. Things were just starting to settle down, why was Kamiki starting to rile things up again?

"What, you really mean to tell me you're totally fine with having to rely on people like that? Teammates who ditch you just when they find out who your dad is? It's pathetic!"

"Could ya at least act like you're not talkin' about us?" Came an irritated voice from the back. Shit, she knew there were a couple of guys in the class, but she couldn't remember their names if she tried.

Kamiki, however, snorted, and there was the sound of the seats creaking and shoes on the floor. "Oh, my _apologies_ for not letting you sit there and ignore how cowardly you are! Your loyalty is the only thing we should be worried about- you and all the rest of the cowards in our class!"

"Kamiki, are you really gonna pick a fight with everyone?" Paku whispered, but there were more voices cropping up from the back.

"I’m not picking a fight, I’m just calling things out when I see them!” Kamiki snapped. “Honestly! I haven’t seen anyone else stick up for him! People just find a weak target who won’t fight back and pick at them!”

Another girl spoke up, a quieter one. “Not all of us-“

“What, you’re not one of the ones being mean? Big whoop, Moriyama, you’re not one of the ones trying to _stop_ it, either.”

“Leave her alone, stop tryin’ to drag everyone into your mess!”

“My mess? This whole situation is your fault! You and Miwa!”

“Me?!”

“Hey!” Shura stood up to her feet and looked back at the kids, who startled at her sudden shouting. It was fun eavesdropping, but man, these brats were getting way too riled up. “Shut up and take a nap or somethin’! Don’t embarrass us with yer bickering!” 

She dropped back down in her seat, then, and the subway fell into silence. She could hear shuffling as the kids shifted in their seats and whispered to each other, but no more fights broke out. Small blessings for now, sure, but if this was really how the whole mission was going to go? With them bickering and fighting at any and every opportunity?

That bottle of tequila was starting to sound really, really tempting

* * *

"Back again already, then?"

Normally, Shiro might've had the energy for a quip, but as it was, he managed a dirty glare towards Dragulesc. The man only scoffed, but pointed to the examination table in the middle of the room- with plenty of younger interns around to watch, of course. Dragulesc would never let him forget that he was still an experiment, in his mind.

"Well? Come on, I don't have all day."

"Piss off," He muttered, and crossed the room to heave himself up onto the table. Luckily, today was one of the only days off that the Vatican had given him in nearly three weeks, so he was free to live the whole day in his pajamas. It was doubly worth it when Dragulesc gave his sleep wear an unimpressed look.

"What has been ailing you so much that you decided to grace me with your presence?" The arc knight asked him, even as he impatiently began taking Shiro's vitals. Hey, he didn't blame the other man. He wanted to get out of here asap as well, but Dragulesc was the only doctor qualified and trusted to help him.

Well, trusted, maybe not so much. By the Vatican, at least. "Are us clones supposed to be able to have heart problems?"

"You clones," Dragulesc echoed with a roll of his eyes, "Aren't supposed to even be _living_ near as long as you have. You're an odd case, by every stretch of the definition. We don't have any precedents for you."

"Yeah, I got that part," Shiro scowled, already tired of the whole interaction. He should have just suffered in silence. "We're talking about heart problems, here, doc."

"I suppose it's within the realm of possibilities. As I've said, the clone bodies are only meant to exist as long as the demon king needs them, which isn't usually all that often for those of Azazel's power. It would make sense that your body would be shutting down, in human like ways."

Shit. His scowl turned to a deep frown. Man, of all the years he was alive, why was his body choosing _now_ to give out on him? This was when he needed it most. He needed to be _here_ , in Assiah, with his boys. "How do I stop that?"

Dragulesc made a sound almost like a laugh, as he moved to take a clipboard from a nearby table and scribble something down on it. "You could take a page out of typical human books and change some lifestyle choices. Reduce stress, healthy diet, exercise, things of that nature."

"Reduce stress?" Shiro raised an eyebrow, but when Dragulesc's face didn't change, he snorted. "Unlikely. The Vatican's gonna work me into the grave."

"Of course they will. Not only have you lost their trust, you've also embarrassed them. Whoever heard of a paladin going directly against the Grigori's orders?" Dragulesc wondered aloud, handing the clipboard to one of the interns. "They have to save face, prove that they still have control over not only you, but the Order as a whole. This is an ordeal you've brought entirely upon yourself, I have to say."

Shiro huffed out a sigh and reached up to rub at his eyes. Dragulesc had to be the worst makeshift therapist on the face of the planet. "Very helpful, thank you."

"If you wanted to know my professional opinion, which I know you're just dying to hear," The arc knight drawled, finally turning away from the interns and clipboards to look down at him. "Retire. It will save the Grigori some of their dignity, and save you from some of the exorcists who are actively calling for your head."

"It'll also save me from making up my reputation with said exorcists," He pointed out, but in all honesty, he didn't care much if True Cross hated him. They were an organization built on blood, bodies, and suffering, and he wanted nothing to do with them or their fanatics.

"You have no reputation to make up. You chose to harbor and raise the demon sons of Satan, which is likely as far as you can go into betraying the Vatican without putting the label on it."

Shiro didn't reply to that.

In all honesty, he'd already been considering retiring, even before Satan's possession of his body. His boys were growing up fast, and yet it seemed like he was missing so much of their lives with all the missions and responsibilities he had to take on. He hadn't even been able to go along on Rin's first mission out of the prefecture because the Grigori were so dead set on running him into the ground.

With the revelation of their heritage to the world, Shiro needed to be there to support his sons. They weren't old enough yet to take on that sort of pressure alone. If retirement was the best way for him to be more active in their lives, then it was a decision he wouldn't hesitate to take.

"Are you just going to continue taking up space, or was there more you needed me for?"

He blinked, and looked up at a rather irritated looking Dragulesc. His mouth quirked up in a bit of a grin. "Won't you be sad, losing your number one guinea pig?"

"Oh, please," Dragulesc scoffed. "You may have both your hands on the wheels, now, but your destination is the same as any other clone. I'll have you back on a table soon enough, dead or alive."

That made him stop short. His grin fell.

"Get going, then. You're just taking up space now."

An uneasy feeling settled in his stomach, but that wasn't enough to overpower the feeling of 'get the hell out already' he got whenever he was around Dragulesc. He didn't give the arc knight so much as a backwards glance as he left, but he still had the feeling of eyes at the back of his head as he closed the door to the lab behind him.

"SHIRO~!"

"Jesus shit!"

He damn near fell to the ground as a cloud of pink and purple suddenly exploded before him, but as it was, his heart hammered so hard in his chest that he felt like he really _was_ going to have a heart attack. He turned a harsh glare up to the grinning demon king before him.

"You shit, are you _trying_ to kill me?" Shiro demanded, to which Mephisto only laughed.

"Of course not, my dear friend! I simply thought it might be prudent to check in on you, I hear word that your health is failing!"

He scowled and stomped past the demon, determined to put as much space between them as possible. "I don't know how you heard that, and honestly, I don't give a damn. Goodbye."

"Ah, so curt!" Mephisto cried, but his footsteps were aggravatingly close behind Shiro. "Wouldn't you like to hear what I have to say?"

"What, is it another deal you'll double cross me on?" He called back, irritated.

"Oh, please, my friend, are you still wounded by our last one? Surely not!"

Shiro rolled his eyes and yanked the keys out of his pocket, trudging towards the closest door that would take him back to the monastery. He pulled up the silver one with 'home' written in sharpie across the top and jammed it into the keyhole, yanking the door open, only for a hand to come up over his head and push the door closed. He stopped, closed his eyes, and let out a deep breath that, in the end, did nothing to ease his annoyance. He shifted around to look up at Mephisto, whose entire face seemed to be making Shiro angry right now.

"Did you really think you could escape through keys of my own creation?" Mephisto asked, winking.

He wasn't in the mood to play around with the demon king today. "What do you want?"

"Can I not just inquire into the wellbeing of a friend of mine?" Mephisto's fake innocence was hardly convincing. Shiro continued to glare at him. "Fine, fine, I'll get to the point. You really are no fun, you know?"

"The point?" He pressed.

"Yes, yes, well, I simply had a warning for you, my dear," Mephisto hummed, and finally leaned back away from the door to give him some space. "My advice would be against going into retirement so soon."

Shiro could have asked how Mephisto knew he was seriously considering that, but he knew it'd just be a waste of time. The demon always seemed to have a penchant for knowing things he really shouldn't. "And why's that?"

"Is my word not enough?" Mephisto asked, miming offense.

"'Your word' apparently doesn't mean jack shit," He snapped, crossing his arms.

"The old deal again? Did it truly wound you so?"

His lip twitched, eyes narrowing. "It nearly got my kids _killed."_

"Your kids?" Mephisto asked, raising a mischievous eyebrow.

He didn't fall for the bait. "I got no reason to trust you, you ass."

Mephisto, however, only sighed, and a handkerchief appeared with a puff of smoke for him to dramatically pat his eyes with. "I wish you would understand that the choices I make are only for the greater good, my friend. I've seen more futures than you can imagine."

"Oh, really?" Shiro laughed an angry sort of laugh, and pulled the door open behind him. "Then what about this future, huh? My resignation letter is gonna be on your desk by the end of the month."

Without waiting for whatever Mephisto would say next, he stepped through the door and slammed it behind him, breathing harsh in the silent monastery he'd stepped into. There was no stopping the demon king from coming after him, of course, and there was no place he could really escape. He just didn't care, honestly. Mephisto could go stick his omniscience up his own ass, Shiro wanted nothing more to do with it.

But as the seconds crawled by, the angry energy faded, and exhaustion and weariness started to settle back into his bones. He leaned back against the wall and slid down towards the floor, hitting it with a soft _thump._ He let his eyes close and leaned his head back against the wall, trying to breathe more slowly as pins and needles throbbed through his body.

Dragulesc had said to reduce stress, huh? Well, wasn't that just going great so far? His sons were in a different prefecture, Rin's life was precariously in the balance, Mephisto was intent on interfering, Dragulesc was still hounding his ass, Shura hated him now, the Grigori didn't trust him- God, he could just keep going on and on. His chest ached, and he almost wished he would just have a heart attack, just to get him out of all of this for a few days. A hospital would be a nice break. Maybe he could even find a pretty nurse to annoy.

Retirement was starting to sound more and more appealing.

* * *

The sound of the subway screeching to a halt was both a blessing and a curse- but a blessing, more immediately, because Yukio was finally able to worm his way out of his seat and past a loudly snoring Shura.

"Alright!" He called out as he stood up. The exwires were starting to stand as well, hefting their bags over their shoulders as they looked up at him. "The Tottori branch was kind enough to offer us residence in the city near the Kannon-in temple, so we'll first go to drop all of our bags off at the hotel before we report to the temple for mission briefing. Stay close and don't get lost, understood?"

There was a chorus of muted 'yes, sensei', but nowhere near the usual energy he'd come to expect. He supposed it had to do with his twin's recent reveal, but as he looked over at the exwires lining up along the aisle, there was a visible sort of tension between them all. Rin looked like he'd been guided to the front of the line by a tired looking Paku, and his brother shot him a smile that looked just a bit too strained at the edges. Yukio closed his eyes, and breathed out a quick sigh.

He didn't know what had happened while he had his headphones in, but nothing good, apparently.

Shura snored once more in the seat next to him, and with a roll of his eyes, he kicked the seat and jolted her awake.

"Who? Wha's goin' on?"

"We're leaving," Yukio gritted out.

"Ahhh, okay," She drawled, and smiled at him sleepily. "Carry me? 'M tired."

He didn't answer that, only narrowed his eyes. She barked out a laugh and rubbed at her eyes, standing up and grabbing her own bag off the floor. She started to lean towards him, and with a huff, he stepped out of the way and towards the door of the car, ignoring her squawking laughter as the doors opened in front of him.

The first thing that hit him was the heat. The coolness of the subway quickly became a memory as warm air breezed through the doors and ruffled his hair. Suddenly, he was glad that he had decided to forego wearing his exorcist coat for now. 

He stepped out onto the pavement of the station, and as crowds of people swarmed around, he felt a hand grab on to one of his belt loops. Rin, likely. His brother held on tight as Yukio navigated his way past the crowd and out of the station, into the busy streets of Tottori city.

"Tokyo?"

He looked up as a voice called over the humming of passing people and passing conversations, and spotted a woman standing up from a bench. She was dressed in the typical exorcist coat, a red scarf over the breast of her uniform. Her skin was tanned, and her long braid of dark hair slipped over her shoulder as she reached a hand out for him to shake.

"Inoue Daichi, upper first class exorcist," She greeted with a soft smile. "I'm glad to see you all arrived safely, I-"

"Daichi~!"

Both Yukio and Inoue were startled as a flash of red darted by to his left, and a giggle rang out as Shura appeared and swept Inoue up in a tight hug.

"You never told me you transferred to Tottori!" Shura cried out, visibly squeezing Inoue. "I thought you were still over in the Middle East!"

Inoue smiled down at her and hugged her back, and when the two separated, Yukio spotted her hand curled around Shura's back. To his confusion, Shura seemed genuinely happy as she grinned up at Inoue and only sidled closer instead of shooing her hand away.

"Well, a spot opened up for advancement in the Tottori branch, and I figured I'd move over to be closer to my mom's side," Inoue explained, smile lingering. “I didn't think I'd see you here."

Shura snorted. "Yeah, I'm stuck with the bratty exwires for their mission. The kid in glasses over there is my co-partner."

"The- oh!" A soft pink flush settled over Inoue's cheeks as she looked back over to them. "I apologize, that was rude of me. What did you say your name was?"

Yukio smiled to ease her embarrassment, but it was soured a bit by his confusion. "Okumura Yukio, middle first class. I'm happy to be working with you."

Her eyes widened a bit, and her expression turned to one of awe. "Ah, that Okumura Yukio? The pleasure is all mine, I never thought I'd be meeting the prodigal boy."

"Prodigal?" He heard Shima whisper behind him.

"He was the youngest to ever pass the exorcist exam," Was Konekomaru's reply. Yukio found himself feeling a strange mix of uncomfortable and embarrassed at the reminder of his reputation. 

"Ohhh!"

"I apologize, I didn't mean to embarrass you," Inoue said with a sheepish smile, raising her other hand to rub at the back of her neck. "I'll lead you all to the barracks, then?"

"Let's go! We got a lotta catchin' up to do," Shura cut in, much to the amusement of Inoue as she tugged the black haired exorcist along the street.

With the attention finally off of him, Yukio let the smile drop, perfectly content to quietly follow behind the two women before him. He couldn't help but feel incredibly grateful that Inoue was here- now he had someone else to keep Shura off of his back. The walk down the streets was blissfully quiet, for him at least, with no annoying joke of a co-partner trying to egg responses and irritation out of him every few seconds.

"...so, Tottori, right?" Shima started from somewhere behind him, laughing a bit awkwardly in the silence that had settled over the rest of the group. “There’s so much to see! Think we could go check out the castle ruins?”

“It’ll depend on how long the mission takes,” Miwa said, quietly. “We probably won’t have the time.”

“But it could totally be educational! That’s a good excuse, right?”

“Shima...”

“Did dad ever take you here?” 

Yukio startled a bit as Rin suddenly spoke up next to him. He looked down at his brother, whose eyes were wide as he looked over and around at the various shops and stores. There was something almost carefree about the way Rin was walking close to him, smiling up at the sky. 

“Not that I can remember, no,” He said, eventually. “This is one of the few times that the Tottori branch has reached out to have other branches send trainees. It’s the first time I’ve been here.”

“It’s really pretty, huh?” Rin wondered aloud, swiveling his head to watch a group of students pass nearby. “I’m glad I got to see it at least once.”

Yukio breathed out a little huff through his nose. “I’m sure we’ll be able to come back and visit again some day. But,” He raised his voice a bit for Shima, behind them, to hear. “Let’s not forget we _are_ here for a mission, so don’t get too distracted.”

“We can still have a little fun though, right, guys?” Shima’s cheer sounded forced, but the resounding silence that followed was deafening. 

“...I think I’d like to go see the Amedaki Falls,” Shiemi said, just before the silence grew unbearable. 

“And we never get time to go to the beach during the school year,” Kamiki added. 

“There are some shrines, too, if we had the time?”

Yukio let out a sigh. With the hopeful eyes he could feel on his back and Rin’s own tentative smile, he felt himself wavering a bit. 

“Maybe,” He acquiesced, but turned his head back to eye the exwires as Shima cheered loudly. “ _Depending_ on how the mission goes. Don’t forget our priorities.”

“The kids want to see the rest of Tottori?” Inoue asked in front of them, and as he looked forward again, both women were peering back at them. At his nod, she smiled a bit. “I’m sure we could find the time for sight seeing.”

“Hell yes!”

“Thank God!”

Thankfully, the barrack building that Inoue was leading them to was quickly growing closer, cutting off too much of the exwires’ celebrations. The building that appeared before them was tall, almost apartment-like in its size and the number of people milling about. Surprisingly, the exorcists of Tottori weren’t wearing their coats like most everyone at Tottori did, instead walking about in casual clothes. There was a relaxed air about the street, and the exorcists smiled and waved at their group as they came up on the sidewalk. 

Inoue paused before their group, even as Shura went up ahead and into the building. “This here will be our base of operations for your mission. The first floor is the common area, cafeteria, and gym, and the basement floor has training areas for most of your needs. The second floors and up are rooms, and we’ve sequestered off a hallway for you all on the third floor. This building is primarily for administration, while the other nearby complexes house the meisters. We’ll hand out your room keys once we get inside, alright?"

At the exwires’ sounds of agreement, she nodded and turned to continue leading them in. 

In short order, the group got their keys and were ushered off into their hallway, where rooms were decided with just a little hitch. Yukio was unsurprised to hear that Shura was going to be finding residence in another hallway (which Inoue seemed a bit too embarrassed about to be completely innocent), which left them with an odd number of people to separate up. He was equally unsurprised to be roomed with his brother, but while the rest of the group divided into pairs, they were left with only Shiemi without a pair. 

“I don’t mind rooming alone,” She had said, ever the negotiator. 

They had enough rooms available to do so, and with that settled, it was soon time to gather in the lower floors for the mission briefing. With so many other senior exorcists available, Inoue assured both him and Shura that they could take the night free while they briefed the exwires. 

“There really isn’t much else to explain besides what you received in your own briefings,” Inoue had assured him, while Shura had no hesitations about running off with a cheer. They both traded a look of exasperation (more irritation on his part than hers), but she continued on. “We’ll mostly be taking the chance to field questions about our branch versus your own.”

“And hopefully convince a couple of them to transfer over here, eh?” Came another voice, jokingly. “We could use a couple fresh hands!”

Yukio glanced to the side to see another woman grinning a sharp toothed grin at them. For a second, he was startled by the crown of horns that curled around her head and over where her eyes would be. He was embarrassed to catch himself staring, but she was already halfway down the hall, a white cane mapping the floor before her.

“...that’s Ohashi Yuka,” Inoue cut in, after a beat of silence. The expression on her face looked like that of someone expecting a rude comment. “She’s the best tamer our branch has ever put out, she’s perfectly capable.”

“No, that wasn’t what I-“ He cut himself off before he could make an ass of himself, cheeks flushing. “I have to admit, there aren’t many part demon exorcists in our branch. I’m not used to seeing others with, well, visible demonic traits.”

Inoue hummed at that, but didn’t press it further, thankfully. Yukio wasn’t sure he’d be able to avoid saying something stupid. “Maybe you should go find Shura? I’m sure she sniffed out our alcohol collection already.”

He chuckled at that. “That’s pretty likely.”

Yukio wasn’t surprised whatsoever to track Shura down to the kitchens, where she was hunched in a chair over a cheap plastic table. There was a small cup in her hand, and a half empty sake bottle on the table next to her head. She was snoring away, her hair falling loosely like waves over her shoulders as her hand dripped sake onto the table. 

He merely sighed at that, and took a second to rub at his eyes before he crossed the kitchen over to the table. A quick glance up to the clock revealed that it was hardly even 8pm, and yet here Shura was, dozing away like they _weren’t_ on a mission. 

“Shura,” He called. As he expected, no answer. He reached a hand out to jostle her shoulder, which drew a quiet groan out of her mouth. “Shura, come on. Wake up. Don’t make me get a bucket of water again.”

“...don’t.... gonna be cold...” She sighed, eyes blinking open before she moved to hide her face in her arms. “Promise you won’t get the water?”

He rolled his eyes. “I promise. Will you get up now?”

“Mmh... maybe...”

With a huff, he leaned down to hook his hands underneath her armpits and hauled her up out of the chair. She groaned in protest at that, but stumbled up to her feet as he pulled her arm up over his shoulder. 

“The sakeeeee,” She whined. “Ya can’t find... good shit like that anywhere!”

“Good or not, that hardly excuses getting drunk this early in the night,” He said, fighting down a scowl as she leaned her weight against him. It was a fight to get across the kitchen and out the doors, and he sent a silent apology to whoever would have to clean her sake mess up. “You do know you’re here on business, right?”

She hummed, and bumped her hip against his. “Doesn’t mean a gal can’t have fun! You should try it!”

“I’m underage,” He said dryly. 

“Ahhh, live on the dangerous side sometimes! Loosen up, break a few rules.”

“I’ll pass.”

“Hmh,” She huffed, but was quiet as he carried her down the halls towards the stairs. “...probably a good idea. Ya wanna save that liver of yours.”

“That’s rich, coming from you.”

She cackled at that, stumbling over her own ankles so hard that she fell to the stairs. Of course, she ended up dragging him along with her, and he let out a grunt as his elbow banged against the railing and he caught himself on his knees. Shura was sprawled out over the steps and giggling like mad, only laughing even louder when he directed a glare towards her. Yukio eventually sighed and shifted around to sit down on the steps, as Shura’s giggles died down. 

“Are you sufficiently entertained now?” He asked, resisting the urge to roll his eyes again. It would only egg her on more. 

“Oh, absolutely!” She said, immediate. Her grin was wide, cheeks flushed with alcohol. “You should lighten up a bit, chicken! Yer gonna scare off all the girls, lookin’ like that!”

“Dating is very last on my list of priorities.”

Shura leaned uncomfortably close, reaching up to poke at his cheeks. He did roll his eyes, then, and slapped her hands away. “Don’t say that, kiddo. Teenage years are the perfect time to do dumb shit, then ya grow and shit gets not so fun anymore.”

“I’m not in a position to goof off like that,” He explained, exasperated. “You should know that.”

“Yeah, yeah,” She waved a hand flippantly. “Ya got a dad to handle the hard shit for ya, just focus on keepin’ yer own shit together.”

He only hummed in response, to which she chuckled at again before falling back against the steps. Unlike Shura, he couldn’t just push responsibilities onto other people. Rin was too childish to understand what all was going on, and their father was busy enough as it was. He didn’t have time to play around, or do ‘dumb shit’, as Shura put it. 

But he didn’t feel like getting into an argument now, so he kept his mouth shut. Shura, for her part, was just as quiet, and her grin had faded away to a vacant, blank look. Eventually, she spoke again. 

“Don’t spend so much time workin’ that you forget other people in yer life, yeah?” It was muted, much more serious than what he would’ve expected from her. “Last thing ya wanna do is be at the end of yer life and realize ya don’t have anyone there with you.”

Suddenly, Yukio felt very much like he was sitting through something he wasn’t meant to see. He’d known Shura for years, but there was something vulnerable here. Something exposed, and raw, and he found himself clamming up.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” He said, because what else could he say? His skin was practically vibrating with discomfort, but thankfully, Shura only closed her eyes. 

Which was fine, and all, until she was completely blacked out and Yukio realized he was going to have to carry her dead weight back up the stairs.


	11. a candle, an affirmation, and a mission's beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm sorry for the late update today. College is beginning to get rather stressful, and today turned out to be kind of a sucky day, so I'm running just a bit behind schedule.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the chapter though! Many fun things are thrown in here!

“Lighting candles?”

Yukio had to agree with his brother’s confusion on the directions, as he and Shura stood before Rin in one of Tottori’s more secluded training rooms. She was dressed in little more than a robe, clearly hungover, and only God knew where she had gotten the thick bag of candles that she was holding out to Rin. His brother took the bag and pulled one of the candles out, blinking in confusion at the wick in front of his eyes. 

“What’s the point of this again?” Rin asked, squinting at the candle. 

“It’s simple,” Shura covered her mouth as she yawned, flopping down on the ground and crossing her legs. Her hair was a tangled mess down her back, and she scratched at it with one hand as she pointed to the candles with the other. “All ya done so far is lose control of shit, from what I hear. Ya gotta have some control over the flames if ya have any hope of passin’ that exam for the Grigori. Lettin’ loose is only gonna scare ‘em.”

Yukio hummed, and lifted a hand to his chin. “Ah, that makes sense. If he can learn to concentrate it in small areas, he can build up to controlling it in other larger ways.”

“Bingo!” Shura grinned. 

“So I just have to... light it?” At her nod, Rin looked down at the candle, staring for a second. Yukio watched down at him as he set the candle down on the ground and closed his eyes, concentrating. There was a pause, a sort of _shifting_ in the air- and then Rin’s body promptly burst into flames. Yukio sighed, pressed a hand to his forehead. Shura only cackled. 

“Great first try, sprat! Haha!”

“Aw, c’mon, it’s only like, the third time I’ve actually used them!” Rin huffed. “Where’s the fire extinguisher?”

Shura shook her head and crossed her arms. “Nope! Put ‘em out yourself. We’re learnin’ control here, remember? Call ‘em back.”

“Ugh, fine.”

Rin closed his eyes again, and after a few seconds, the flames across his shoulders fizzled out, one by one. As he tried once more, and set fire to himself once more, Yukio couldn’t help the frown that pulled at his mouth. The sight of the blue fire still made his skin crawl, if he was being honest with himself. The feeling didn’t ease any as Rin tried- and failed -to set fire to the candles, time and time again with no success. Each attempt, he only burst uncontrollably into fire, and Shura would have him try again to start the cycle anew. 

Yukio was beginning to believe that maybe this wasn’t a good idea. As if the flames themselves weren’t bad enough, Rin had absolutely no control over where they spawned, or how much, or for how long. That, by itself, was a dangerous combination. Adding in how he was barely able to put them out, and the impossible time limit that they had, it was very quickly starting to feel pointless. If this didn’t work, then it would be Rin’s life on the line. 

“I did it! Look!”

Rin burst out excitedly as the fire finally spawned off of himself, but the sight of the candle catching entirely on fire didn’t ease any of Yukio’s unhappiness. The floor was scorched, the wax was melting, and the candle was destroyed. Even so, Rin smiled. Like somehow, this fantastic show of his lack of restraint was good enough. Yukio bit back a sigh, but tension was starting to rise in his chest. This was their one chance at saving Rin, and it wasn’t moving nearly as fast as it should be. 

“No the hell you didn’t,” Shura cut in, rolling her eyes from where she’d sprawled across the floor. “Yer supposed to light the wick, not the whole candle, idiot. Ya gotta think _poof_ , not _boom_. Try again, reign it in more.”

Rin only nodded, his smile fading away. Concentration took over his expression as Shura tossed him another candle, which he set on the ground and once again began fixating on. 

Except this one only caught on fire, as well. And the next one. And the next one. And two more. Then three more. Each one had his irritation rising, the tension thickening, and with each failure, he was becoming more and more aware that this was useless. Sure, they had a few months, but he knew how the Grigori were. They would find any reason at all to sentence Rin to death. If his twin’s control wasn’t _absolutely_ airtight and complete, then all of this would be for nothing. 

Shura groaned from the floor as yet another candle met a molten, waxy fate, rubbing at her eyes. “C’mon, kid, we’ve been at this for like, a half hour now. What’s not clickin’?”

“I don’t know,” Rin only shrugged, reaching a finger out to poke idly at the mountain of hardened wax. “Do we really have time for this? I thought we were supposed to start the mission today.”

“That’s why we woke ya up so early. We gotta get practice time in before y’all are set to go.”

“Rin, we need to see some sort of progress today,” Yukio said. He was trying to keep his frustration contained, but his shoulders felt tense, heavy. “And honestly, if that means holding you back from the mission, then that’s what we’ll do.”

“It’s just not working. It’s like it’s just going wherever it wants, y’know? It doesn’t really wanna be controlled,” Rin picked a piece of the wax off, rolling it between his fingers. 

Was he serious? After all of this, and that was all that he could say? ‘It doesn’t really wanna be controlled’? Yukio’s expression furrowed, eyes narrowing. “Are you even trying?”

Rin caught his tone and frowned up at him, but he just still didn’t seem to be taking things _seriously!_ “I’m doing my best-“

“That’s not good enough anymore, Rin!” Yukio snapped. “Dad and I have been bending over backwards to carry your weight for years, but we can’t do that for you anymore! Whether you get this or not is up to you, so half assing it like you always do isn’t enough!”

“Hey!” Shura got to her feet and stood between them, facing Yukio with a scowl. “Look, ya both gotta calm down. I get yer stressed, but dukin’ it out like this ain’t helpin’ anybody. We’re takin’ a break. Both of you, go chill out.”

God, was he the only one who understood the urgency of all this? “We don’t have time-!”

“Enough, Yukio,” She cut in, voice firm. “I’m in charge of this shit, I’m the higher rankin’ officer, and fuck it, I’m the adult here. We’re takin’ a break. Last time I’m sayin’ this.”

“Wait, wait, just- just give me a second, okay?”

Both his and Shura’s attention was drawn back to Rin behind them, who had yanked another candle out of the bag and was setting it up next to the wax pile on the floor. Shura hesitated, but stepped away from him, and both of them looked down at Rin as his twin closed his eyes for what must have been the thirtieth time. Yukio opened his mouth, about to tell Rin to stop already, but he felt it click back shut as his hair stood on end. There was another presence in the room, something that felt like watching a tornado form. Dangerous, eerily close, and watching, somehow. 

Then, as quickly as it came, the feeling disappeared. His irritation gone, Yukio could only look down at the candle on the ground, where the wick had been lit. 

The flame was tall and wild, and the wax was melting quickly, but the flame had been lit on the wick. 

Rin had done it. 

His brother turned a tentative smile up to him, and there was something like an apology in his body language. “I had to, uh, think about it for a sec. It’s more like... breathing, I think. Not so much _poof_.”

He couldn’t think of what to say, and the silence stretched for a long second. Shura turned to look at Rin completely, a wry sort of grin on her face. “Well, I’ll be damned, kid. Where was that this whole time?”

Rin shrugged, but the smile was quickly fading. Shura only laughed, her hands moving to her hips. 

“Either way, that’s good enough for today. Go get yer shit together for the mission, yeah? Go on, scram!”

With a nod, Rin got to his feet, stretching his arms up over his head. He spared a look back at the pile of wax, but Shura waved him off, and with that, he left both Yukio and Shura alone in the training room. 

“...someone’s gotta talk to the kids about Rin,” She said, quietly. “Mission ain’t gonna go well if they’re still scared of him.”

“I’ll do it,” He replied. He knew he was going to have to, eventually. 

Shura only sighed. “Nah, not you. Ya got enough on your plate as is.”

He frowned. “They’re my students, I’m perfectly capable of-“

“I’m not questionin’ your ability, Yukio,” She cut him off, turning to look at him. The look on her face was serious, which startled him into silence if only because he wasn’t used to seeing her so. “I know ya can do it, but face it, yer snippy enough as is. Yer stressed, and tired, and worn out, and everyone can see it. Ya need to figure yer own shit out before you start gettin’ to everyone else’s, alright?”

He opened his mouth to retort, but then closed it. She was right. Shit, she was right. He’d totally just lost his temper with his brother for no real reason, and looking back, he knew he’d messed up. Yukio sighed, reaching a hand up to rub at his eyes under his glasses. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

“Ha!” She crowed, and he yelped as his glasses were suddenly knocked askew, a hand aggressively ruffling his hair. “Don’t worry about it, chicken! Let me be the adult, yeah?”

By the time he managed to get his glasses and hair back in order, Shura was already across the room, one hand on the door handle. He rolled his eyes as she winked at him. “First time I’ve heard you say that.”

“Yer funny!” She called, and then she was gone, somewhere down the hallway. 

Left alone, Yukio let himself have just a minute to calm himself. It was still early in the morning, and they had the mission to leave on with the Exwires in just an hour or so. He couldn’t be losing all of his patience now, when there was so much of the day to go through. 

And, when he still had an apology to make. 

It was to no surprise to Yukio that Rin was still in their room, pondering two different bottles of sunscreen in his hands as his bag of supplies was sprawled before him. Yukio leaned against the doorway, his arms crossed as he watched his brother. It didn’t take long for Rin to notice him, though he almost dropped the sunscreen when he did. There was a sheepish smile on his face, but the awkwardness was undeniable. 

“Hey, Yukio,” Rin greeted. 

“Hi,” He replied back. Luckily (or maybe unfortunately) he had too much experience with apologizing after little meltdowns, so this felt familiar, at least. “I’m sorry for snapping at you.”

Rin looked a bit surprised, but then his smile turned a bit more genuine. “I get it, it’s okay. It’ll take a lot more than that to scare your big brother off.”

“It’s not okay, but thank you,” Yukio chuckled. He could still feel Rin’s gaze on him, and looked down at the floor. “Dad and I are coming under a lot of fire these days. There’s not much we can do to help you, not like we used to, Rin.”

“I get it,” Rin set the sunscreen in his bag, putting a few of his other supplies in as well. “Hopefully not for much longer.”

That made him pause, and his expression slowly fell to concern. Rin had said something like that, the day before. ‘At least I got to see Tottori once.’ Like he wasn't expecting to do so again. “What do you mean?”

“Huh?”

As his twin looked back at him, confused, Yukio was more sure that something was wrong. “You said ‘not for much longer’. And yesterday, you said something like that, too, about Tottori.”

“Oh,” Rin shrugged, and looked away. “It’s just... the test and all, I guess. I don’t know if we’ll get to come back here until the test is over.”

Yukio snorted. At least he was thinking about the exam, if even on a surface level. “Well, just focus on passing it and everything will be fine.”

“Hehe, yeah.”

Rin went back to collecting all his supplies back in his bag, but Yukio still felt as if something hadn't fit into place yet. Something still nagged at him. "Rin?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't..." He paused, not entirely sure what he was trying to say. He was glad Rin was focused on his bag, because Yukio was feeling strangely vulnerable, for some reason. He felt like he was young, younger, staring up at his brash and bold twin as Rin proclaimed to him that there was nothing to be afraid of. In some way, he needed the reassurance, needed it like he hadn't needed it in almost a decade. "Don't say ominous things like that. You're going to pass the test, and we'll come back and see Tottori again with dad."

Rin looked back at him, eyes closed and smile wide. For a second, they were both kids again, and Rin was looking back at him with that smile so bright it was blinding. "Of course! Don't be silly."

"Right," Yukio chuckled. Again, just to assure himself. "Right."

* * *

Ryuji never thought he’d be the type to be hiding behind a door, eavesdropping, but in his defense he definitely did not plan this. It was supposed to be easy- he would just run in, ask Okumura-sensei about a couple verses he was confused about, and then he’d be gone. The hitch to his plan came in the form of Moriyama Shiemi, who was already in the Okumura’s dorm with Okumura-sensei. He knew the polite thing to do would be to walk away, leave them to their privacy, but something kept him glued to the spot. 

It was probably the sound of Moriyama’s tone. 

“...haven’t been talking to you as much,” Her voice was so quiet that he almost couldn’t even hear her. “I just- when the news came out-“

“You don’t have to apologize,” Okumura-sensei cut in when she started to stammer, and though his voice was kind, there was something almost clipped about it. “It’s alright, it’s an intense situation. I’d be more concerned if you weren’t bothered by it.”

Oh. They must have been talking about the other Okumura. 

“I- yes, but... I was just, I was scared, and I didn’t know if...”

“Shiemi, you don’t have to explain yourself. I’m not upset with you.”

“I know, but I was wondering if... you kept things a secret, because you didn’t think I was strong enough to handle it.”

“Oh,” There was a second where he could hear Okumura-sensei sighing, and then the shuffling of feet and cloth. “It isn’t about strength, it’s... my brother’s birth is a sin against God, to the order. They wanted him dead when he was born, and they do, to an extent. The only way we could keep him alive was to keep him a secret. If we had it our way, nobody would ever know.”

“Is that really an okay way to live?” Moriyama asked, quiet again. “Keeping secrets all the time?”

A stretch of silence. And then, “I wouldn’t say secrets are... good, but they’re necessary, sometimes. If Rin had told everyone that he was the son of Satan, then he would’ve been killed, and myself and Father Fujimoto as well.”

_“_ I see...”

“It’s not that we wanted to, but that we had to. It was life or death.”

A sense of discomfort was starting to twist in his stomach, and suddenly he was wishing that he’d never eavesdropped in the first place. 

Ryuji had always hated secrets. He grew up surrounded by secrets, by lying smiles and comforting untruths, and he had always resented it. It was a hatred that only grew with age, and now, it was rearing its' head. Normally, he could hold his nose and push past them, but this? Okumura? That felt worse than anything he'd been lied to about the Myo'dha. Even with what he heard, he didn't know if he could let his anger go.

Satan had destroyed his temple, killed members of his sect and ruined any chances for them to operate without True Cross' help. The Blue Night was only one tragedy under Satan's belt- the demon god had killed hundreds upon millions of exorcists over the years. Ryuji had never been raised Christian, but Satan had always been the embodiment of all evil in the world.

If Okumura had hidden his parentage from him, knowing how much his temple had suffered because of Satan- forget trusting him as a friend, could Ryuji trust him as an exorcist? Could he trust Okumura as a human, however much of his blood wasn't Satan's own?

“Ah- Suguro?”

He blinked, and suddenly Moriyama was before him, standing in the suddenly opened doorway that he was sure had been closed just a minute ago. She was looking up at him, subdued and quiet, and he suddenly felt embarrassment crop up when he realized how he must have looked.

“Sorry! I wasn’t eavesdroppin’ or nothin’, I just wanted to ask Okumura-sensei a question!” Ryuji scrambled to excuse himself, but his mind was difficult to get a hold of when he was still reeling from his thoughts about Okumura. “Uhm.”

“It’s okay, I was just done,” She murmured. 

There was an awkward pause, where Moriyama was staring down at her feet, and he was waiting for her to move. Then, she looked up at him, and there was something vulnerable in her eyes that suddenly made Ryuji feel like whatever she was about to say, he had a duty as her classmate to make her feel better. 

“Suguro, do you think I’m strong?”

“What, you?” Was she being serious? “Of course you are, who told you different?“

Was it Kamiki? He knew that girl had some weird bone to pick with Moriyama, but he thought it was gone after this whole Okumura business. 

She only shook her head, however. “No, I just... Yukio has been my friend for forever, you know? And I feel like he and Rin can’t trust me.”

Ryuji could hear another declaration of words in his ears- _‘Satan’s coming for me and I’m scared!’_ -and once again realized that he had gotten himself in way over his head. “Uh.”

“Oh!” Moriyama’s eyes widened, her cheeks flushing. “I’m so sorry! I was just over sharing, wasn’t I? I’m sorry, Suguro, don’t worry about it!”

“No, no, ‘s okay,” He said, trying to ease her embarrassment.

Apparently, she took that as a sign to continue. “I don’t blame them, honestly. Even now, I’m not strong enough to apologize to Rin for ignoring him.”

Ahh crap, this was going way deeper than he wanted to go. 

“I mean, especially after how much I hurt him,” She looked down the hall, away from him. “He chased us away, and as soon as he let us in, we turned on him.”

...well, yes. In a way, but-

“We talked a lot about how he should rely on us, huh? But when he needed us, we left him.”

“Okay,” Ryuji shifted uncomfortably, eyebrows furrowing at Moriyama. “You’re layin’ it on a little thick here, you can chill now.”

At that, she let out a little laugh. “Yeah, you caught me. I’m sorry.”

“I’m already startin’ to feel bad, was that really necessary?” He groaned. 

She smiled at him. “I guess I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t alone, in all of this.”

Ryuji let out a terse sigh and reached his hands up to rub at his eyes. At this point, all of this guilt tripping from Moriyama, and Okumura-sensei, and even Kamiki was starting to feel like some sort of divine intervention. Like he was being shamed by the Powers That Be, and as much as he hated to admit it, it was working. 

It was definitely working. 

Idly, he asked her. "So, what do we do?"

"Oh! Uh," Obviously, Moriyama hadn't thought that far out. Ryuji chuckled. "I guess we should apologize first, right? Ahhh, I don't know! I've never had friends before."

"Wait," That made him pause. Ryuji looked down at her, incredulous. "Never? You're the same age as the rest of us!"

Moriyama looked embarrassed at that. "W-Well! I lived at home my whole life, I've never been to school before. It was Yuki who motivated me to join the cram class, but I still don't go to regular classes."

"Wow. Fifteen years, huh?" He guessed that explained why she was close with Okumura-sensei. He wondered how far back that went. "Long time to be alone."

"Yeah," She nodded, but as the redness faded from her cheeks, something more melancholic took its' place. Ryuji felt uncomfortable, like he should've been saying something.

"You can, uh... you can hang out with us, if ya want," He offered.

"Really?!" Her head snapped upwards, green eyes wide and excited. "Y-You're not kidding?"

He faltered a bit, embarrassed by her excitement. "I mean, um. Yeah, if you don't mind hangin' around us guys?"

Moriyama's laugh was bright, her smile even brighter. She lunged forward to grab his hand with her own. "Thank you so much, Suguro!"

"It ain't a problem, really-"

"Oh! Shiemi, Suguro, you're still here?"

The two of them were startled by the door behind her opening, as Okumura-sensei stepped out of the room and into the hallway with them. Their teacher looked confused, and held his phone up. "You're supposed to report to the lobby in about three minutes, aren't you?"

His eyes widened.

"Aw shit!"

From there, it was a mad dash for both himself and Shiemi to get back to their rooms, gather their stuff, and get their asses back down to the lobby. He was lucky that he'd packed in advance the night before, and just had to grab his bag and go. When he passed by Moriyama's room, however, he could tell that she was having no such luck. The poor girl was sitting in the middle of a pile of herbs, and with a heavy sigh, he wordlessly stepped into the room to help her pack her stuff. A minute or two passed, and then they were both dashing madly down the stairs to the lobby.

The pair came to a screeching halt before the collected group of exwires and exorcists. Miss Inoue gave them an amused look as they strolled in, late, but continued on with her briefing.

God, that was embarrassing. He could hear scattered snickers from some of the older exorcists across the room, the ones who were supposed to serve as their back up and guides. Ryuji ducked his head, feeling his face warm. Moriyama reached out to touch his hand.

"I'm sorry for making us late," She whispered. The guilt on her face was genuine.

"It's fine," He murmured back. "Least we're here."

As Miss Inoue continued giving them the final run down on the mission (the same one they had heard the night before), Ryuji looked over the room, trying to get an idea of where everyone was. Kamiki and Paku were standing together, unsurprisingly, towards the side of the room nearest the other set of stairs. What was surprising, however, was that Okumura wasn't with them. With how Kamiki had been championing Okumura's cause and their friendship, he thought the guy would've been with her. A strange sort of curiosity had Ryuji trying to find him as Shima and Konekomaru wormed their way through the crowd to stand by him and Moriyama.

Okumura wasn't with Miss Kirigakure, who was standing with Miss Inoue at the front of the room. Nor was he with his younger brother, who was standing with the other team leaders. He looked for that familiar head of black hair, and after a few seconds, finally- there! Okumura was standing by the door-

Alone.

Guilt started to seep up in his chest as he watched the guy rub at his chest, eyes up at the room but something absent in his expression. Okumura's shoulders were limp, like some weight was pulling him down.

' _I'm scared!'_

_'I almost saw my dad die-'_

_'Can't you just let me breathe?'_

God, this shit sucked.

"Hey, does Okumura have a tattoo or somethin'?" Shima was leaned up against him, voice low and curious. "Like, on his chest?"

"I don't think so," But if he was being honest, he wasn't looking whatsoever. His mind was somewhere else.

It was only when people started moving that he broke out of his daze. The exorcists were milling about, some leaving and some returning back to other areas of the compound, and as he looked to the side, he suddenly realized that the other exwires were already moving. Ah, shit, he probably missed the last part of whatever happened. Ryuji followed close behind Moriyama as they made a line over to the teachers, where Miss Inoue was waiting patiently for them.

"Everybody accounted for?" She called. When she got the affirmative from their group, she smiled. "Let's be off, then! Stay with the group, and don't get lost."

* * *

Rin could feel eyes at the back of his head. 

Well, multiple pairs of eyes. It wasn’t exactly a new sensation, not really. He had been used to suspicious eyes his entire life, even before the whole Amaimon fiasco had started. But this felt different. It was doubly uncomfortable, to be walking across the hot desert searching for wisps of green fire, and to look up to see Suguro, or Shiemi, or Shima peering at him. It made him feel ansty, and anxious, but even as unpleasant as those emotions were, they were easier to focus on than the smarting wound in his heart that dug deep every time one of them made eye contact with him. 

Rin pulled the key necklace from beneath his shirt and fiddled with it nervously, ignoring Shura’s confused looks. They’d all been split up into groups, but he hadn’t been surprised at all when he was put by himself with Shura. Being shoved away from a group wasn’t a sensation he was new to, but to have each of the other kids in his class staring at him, and whispering to each other?

“Am I in danger?” He asked to no one in particular. 

Shura blinked, and looked down at him. “What? The hell’re you talkin’ about?”

“Am I in danger?” He looked over at her, feeling apprehension build up in his chest. “They’ve been staring at me like, nonstop!”

“Ha!” She snorted and dropped a hand on his head, managing to tussle his hair before he ducked away from her. “Don’t worry about that, kiddo. Focus on trackin’ these lil beasties down, alright? Ya sure ya can’t sniff ‘em out, or somethin’?”

He frowned at that. In all honesty... he knew he could probably call the will o wisps forward, probably in the same way he’d panicked and called off the naberius from weeks ago. But every time he used his powers, his strength, his abilities, all he could see was Shiro, fighting for him in the courtroom, and Yukio, tired and stressed as he leaned against the door frame. He saw Shura, bartered back into teaching him only through alcohol. He saw Suguro’s hand twitching towards his gun, the fear in Miwa’s eyes, Shiemi’s apprehension every time she looked at him. 

He thought that maybe it would just be better for everyone if he just acted as human as possible. 

“Hey, just say ya can’t if ya can’t,” Shura cut in, side eyeing him. “I know the chicken’s busy losin’ his shit, but ya don’t gotta be a big genius casanova like him. We got time.”

“Right,” Rin murmured. Better she make her own assumptions than she catch him on a lie he couldn’t sell. 

She stopped in the sand to stretch her arms up high over her head, hair vivid red in the growing sunset. He rolled his eyes at her exaggerated groan. “Anywayssss, it’s gettin’ about time for those suckers to pop up, yeah?”

“How should I know?” He retorted. “You’re the teacher here.”

But she was right. He remembered them saying that the little demons came out at night, and he could see the sun setting over the rolling dunes before them. The Kyoto trio were a couple hundred feet ahead of them, and the girls somewhere off in a trench to the right. They were all investigating separate hot spots, and the rest of Tottori’s accompanying exorcists were scattered around with them. 

“Do you know where Yukio went?” He asked, idly, as he looked over the sand for wisps of green. 

“Uhhh,” He could see her raising a hand over her eyes, squinting somewhere to his left. “Yeah, he’s over there with- ohh, my lady Daichi!”

Before he could even blink, she was already dashing off through the sand towards the group of Tottori exorcists. He startled, panicking. “What?! I’m not supposed to be alone!!”

“I’ll send Yukio your way~!”

“Don’t-!” But she was already gone, and suddenly he found himself alone, standing in the swaying sand under the cooling wind. Rin tilted his head up towards the sky and groaned, discomfort crawling under his skin. 

He didn’t _actually_ want Shura to come send his brother along. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see Yukio, just that, well... all he ever seemed to do was stress Yukio out these days. He knew Yukio just wanted to see him succeed, to master his powers and pass this test, but he didn’t know how to tell his twin that it wouldn’t matter anyways. 

He only had a few mo-

“Yo, Okumura!”

Rin started near violently at the call of his name, and looked to the side just to see a head of pink hair pop up from the sand. Shima, of all people, managed to climb his way up the dunes of sand, and grinned breathlessly at him as he finally came to a stop. His staff was in his hand, stabbed deep into the sand. 

“Um,” This was awkward, but also nerve wracking at the same time. What did Shima want? “Hi?”

“Man, seems kinda dumb that we had to be up so early when the wisp things are only gonna come out about now, right?” Shima said, casually, as if there was nothing wrong with this at all. 

Rin couldn't shake the awkwardness off. “I guess... are you like, planning on jumping me or something?”

“What?” Shima snorted out a laugh, but the grin on his face promptly fell when he realized Rin wasn’t joking. “You seriously think I’d do that?!”

“I don’t know! You’ve been staring at me weird all day!” He retorted, crossing his arms. “What was I supposed to think?”

Shima’s laugh sounded a bit more forced the second time, his expression sheepish. “Right. I guess I didn’t really give you a reason to think otherwise, huh?”

Rin’s eyebrows furrowed. What was he getting at? “Sure.”

“I’m sorry about that,” Shima said, his smile fading a bit as he looked out over the sand. “It’s not an excuse, or anything, but sometimes it’s just easier to go with the flow, yknow?”

“...what are you trying to say?” 

“What I’m trying to say is, it was stupid of me to start ignorin’ you outta nowhere,” Shima turned to look at him then, holding a hand out. “Can we be buds again?”

He panicked. “No.”

“No?” Shima blinked, confused. “You’re not even gonna think about it?“

“No,” Rin said, more firmly, and twisted away from Shima to hide the nervousness that was suddenly starting to crop up in his chest. He’d made a mistake being friends with them in the first place. He had one single mission, and for a time, he’d forgotten about that, stupidly. He’d let Suguro win him over with his bullheaded determination, and pave the way for the other exwires to worm themselves in. He wasn’t going to make that mistake again, not now. 

So, even though he knew it was mean, and it hurt him to say, he glared back at Shima and huffed out, “I don’t want to be friends with a cowardly pushover anyways.”

“Oh, that’s mean!” Shima whined. “Can’t you at least give me a chance? You’re gonna need all the help you can get, yknow! You only have, what, a few months left?”

Rin’s stomach dropped.

“...what?”

“The test,” Shima specified, but there was something like a grin pulling at his lips. “You’re running out of time, right? Wouldn’t it be better to have allies on your side?”

He could feel his heart skip a beat in his chest, then rush back hard and fast in his ears. 

Did Shima know?

“Rin, you know you’re not supposed to be out by yourself.”

The voice of his twin cut through the tension, and like nothing happened at all, Shima turned to Yukio with crocodile tears in his eyes. 

“Senseiiiiiii!” He wailed. “Okumura is being cruel!”

“Why aren’t you with your team?” Yukio asked, frowning. He wasn’t phased at all by Shima’s act, just brushing the other teen off of his arm when Shima clung to it. “Don’t forget what your mission here is.”

“Alright, alright~”

“And Rin,” Yukio turned his frown to him, which softened a bit, probably because of the argument they already had in the morning. “Your classmates aren’t a replacement for your assigned guardians. Please be more careful.”

Rin was still at a loss for words. Shima’s eyes were zeroed in on him, amused and curious, as if waiting for what he was about to say. Or was he imagining it? That was the same look Shima had all the time, right? He hadn’t said anything suspicious, not really. Rin was sure he must’ve been paranoid- he was just suspicious about Shima’s sudden offer of friendship, and now he was overthinking it. Right. 

“...gotcha,” He said, eventually. Yukio eyed him oddly, but that seemed to be the end of that. 

Because, in the growing darkness, he could see flashes of green. 

“The will o wisps?” He asked Yukio, who nodded at him. 

He couldn't help but think that they looked pretty, almost. Little puffs of soft green light that danced along the sand, dipping in and out of view. It was kinda like lightning bugs, honestly. Rin felt the urge to run up and catch one, just to see what they looked like up close. As if they could hear him, he watched as a line of wisps danced their way over to their group, flickering in and out, dancing up through the sand and past the dunes. He couldn't help but smile, and knelt down to get a closer look at them.

They looked like little candle lights! As he reached a hand out to one, it drifted over his fingers, and felt like a brush of warm air. Another one hopped up onto his palm, and another, and they twirled about his fingertips, casting green light over his hand and sleeve. He could almost hear little voices, like the whispering of wind. If he focused, he could just barely make them out.

_'...come, come...'_ They seemed to chorus, like the quiet voices of children. ' _Come, come! Come, prince, come...'_

He felt like ice water had just been poured down his back.

Rin flicked the flames off of his hand, his smile dropping as they faded from view. He could feel Shima and Yukio's eyes on him, curious and worried in turn. He forced a smile. "We're supposed to follow 'em, right?"

"Ah, we should wait for the others to get here," Shima cut in, peering out over the sand as the other groups of exorcists started to migrate towards them. "Bon'll kill us if we go on by ourselves."

Rin nodded, but couldn't force himself to say anything more. He could still hear their little voices, whispers of joy and excitement.

' _Come, come!'_ They called, sirens of sand pulling him deeper into the desert. ' _...king... bright the king... come, come!'_

This was all starting to feel like a very bad idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do have a tumblr (@yuriotoko) now! Here is where I have a list of all the fanfics i have published, and I also give sneak peeks of upcoming oneshots and chapters of my fanfics if you would like to see!
> 
> I have a twitter as well (@yuri_otoko) mostly for stupid memes and more info about various fanfics! I post some fanfic ideas on there for feedback and all.
> 
> That aside, thank you for reading


	12. a battle, a report, and an abandoned promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Sorry again for the late timing of this chapter, I promise I'm going to start trying to post them earlier in the day lol! This chapter has more with Daichi (my love, my baby) and even more ominous things thrown in, so I hope you all enjoy!

Ryuji smacked Shima's hand away from the wisps in the sand for what had to have been the fifth time in as many minutes.

"Hey, dumbass," He snapped. "You wanna burn your fingers off?"

Shima turned a plaintive look up at him, whining as Ryuji yanked him up from the ground and pushed him back into their procession. They were following the wisps back to the source now, and like hell he was gonna let Shima make them fall behind. "Aw, c'mon, Bon! Okumura got to hold 'em!"

"That's because Okumura's about the only one who _can_ hold 'em, stupid."

"So mean!" Shima sighed, leaning dramatically on Ryuji's shoulder as they trudged through the dark desert.

With the growing dusk and the minimal light provided by the wisps, Ryuji muttered a mantra beneath his breath, and with that, soft strings of light burst forth from his lips. They lit up the night with color and raced forward to twine around their group, keeping their path illuminated. The exorcists glanced back at him approvingly, and he flushed a bit under the wordless praise. It was a silly mantra that his father had taught him, back when he was a kid. It was supposedly a technique passed down their line of priests, but his father had taught him how to use it when he was young and still afraid of the dark.

(If he was being honest, he was a bit embarrassed to realize that he and his dad had reduced an ancient mantra to a nightlight.)

(He was sure one of the priests down the line had to be rolling in their graves.)

"So," Shima said, low and mischievous. "When are you gonna go apologize to Okumura?"

"What?!" Ryuji startled, shocked. "How did ya even know-"

"Oh please, Bon, you're practically an open book to me at this point!" He crowed. "Big, loud guy like you suddenly goes quiet? You're thinkin' about something, and it ain't hard to figure out what that something is."

His flush deepened. Was he really that obvious?

Shima laughed at him, and Ryuji shoved him away with a roll of his eyes and an irritated huff. Dammit, leave it to the most irritating guy he knew to figure out what was up. Why couldn't it have been Konekomaru?

He trudged ahead in the sand, leaving Shima to scramble after him as he moved closer to the other exwires. Kamiki raised an eyebrow back at him, but he avoided eye contact- he had a feeling she'd be able to sniff out his guilt like a blood hound, and nothing sounded more torturous than admitting to her that she'd been right about Okumura the entire time. It was only when Shima finally caught up, that he finally looked up from the ground.

When Shima spoke again- because the guy was too damn chatty to ever shut up -his voice was at least lower, so that the others wouldn't hear him. "What's your plan, hmm?"

"I dunno," He muttered, reaching a hand down to fiddle with the prayer beads around his wrist. "I don't do this often."

"What, accept that you're wrong?" Shima grinned even as Ryuji glared at him. "You could probs start with pullin' that stick out of your ass."

"What stick?" Ryuji asked, offended.

"You remember the whole, insulting Kamiki over her daddy issues and all?" Shima pointed out, and Ryuji immediately felt white hot mortification flash across his face. He'd let himself forget about that. "You should apologize to her too."

"Why do I have to apologize to her?" He hissed. Wrong or not, he still didn't want her to rub shit in his face!

"Jesus, Bon, because you were being a dick?" Shima said, rolling his eyes. "See, that stick. You're really gonna let that stop you from doing the right thing? That's childish, you know that."

He kept his mouth shut, too annoyed and embarrassed to respond. Shima, however, continued to peer at him expectantly. When Ryuji stubbornly said nothing, he sighed.

"Thank you Shima, you're correct about me being stupid and immature," He imitated dramatically. "I do have a massive stick up my ass, thank you for pointing it out for me instead of letting me ruin my friendships."

Apparently he'd gotten loud enough for others to hear, Ryuji realized as Kamiki frowned back at them. "What the hell is that idiot up to now?"

"Bon's got something to say to you," Shima said, suddenly, before Ryuji could back out. He glared at the aria, who shrugged and pointed at Kamiki. She was looking back at him, suspicious.

He was almost tempted to just tell her to piss off and let that be that, but, well... his mother had raised him better than that. So, even though it tasted like acid in his mouth, he bit out the apology that he should’ve given her weeks ago. "I'm sorry for insultin' you during the camp attack mess."

As Kamiki's expression morphed into one of surprise, Ryuji suddenly had to feel bad for forcing Okumura to do this same thing, months ago. “...what?”

“Ugh, I already said it!” He huffed, feeling his cheeks burn hot. Surely she was just trying to rub it in now, make him repeat it over and over until she was satisfied. His skin felt like it was practically crawling. 

But, to his surprise, Kamiki’s face shifted from surprise to realization, and when he expected the taunt to come, from realization to something unreadable. When she spoke again, it was so quiet that he could barely hear her. 

“Thank you.”

Ryuji opened his mouth, then felt it close, and open again. He didn’t know what to say- he honestly hadn’t expected her to even accept his apology. 

Kamiki only looked back to the group ahead of them, and when Paku sidled up beside her, concern written across her face, Kamiki was quiet. His eyes were glued to her back, and as the awkward silence stretched seconds longer, her shoulders began to visibly tense. She whirled around to face them, and the irritation written across her expression was much more of what he expected. 

“What?!” She demanded. 

Shima was the first to respond, muffling a snort behind his hand. “So cute!”

“What’s cute?!”

“Are you kids alright back there?” One of the exorcists called back, and as Okumura-sensei and Miss Kirigakure turned back to look at them, the trio were startled into silence. 

“Fine,” He called back, when none of them spoke up. 

“Good, because we’re coming up on the will o wisps’ origin.”

Ryuji’s mind turned from their previous conversation to the task at hand, annoyed to realize that he’d forgotten the goal of their mission. Like the older exorcists had said, the wisps on the ground were multiplying, clumps of green fire lighting up the sand around their feet with every step. He looked up above the group, and saw lines of wisps leading them deeper into the sand, between dunes that grew in height and darkness. 

As their path grew blacker, Ryuji started to feel apprehension rise up. The light cast by the wisps became almost haunting in appearance, throwing flickering shadows up on the dunes around them. The lights that his mantra called forth circled closer to the group, and he could’ve sworn he felt nervousness thrumming from the zipping lines. It wasn’t a surprise when his mantra disappeared altogether, and then the only illumination left was green. 

“Wait,” Kamiki said, suddenly. “Do you hear that?”

Their group halted, and the shuffling of boots and weapons faded to silence. He looked around at the dunes, listening intently for whatever Kamiki had heard.

He could hear the gusting of the wind, the whisper of sand as it shifted across the desert. He strained his ears, trying to find anything beneath it. “What did you-“

“Shh!” She hissed, holding a hand up to him. “Footsteps.”

Ryuji scowled at her, but as soon as she said it, he began to hear it. Shuffling, heavy thumping through the sand. _Thump, draaaag. Thump, draaaag._

He could hear the tingling of a lantern, the crackle of fire. 

And then he saw it. 

Like a ghoul called forth from the dead, a figure came around the side of a dune. It was a shifting mass of darkness, vaguely humanoid, with a shifting lantern that cast dizzying green light over it’s form. It was a mangled thing, almost scarecrow-like in appearance, with mottled skin and empty eyes. It dragged itself across their path, trudging through the sand, before it came to a stop, and peered back at them. A Jack lantern demon.

“That’s our cue,” An exorcist laughed. 

The adults began to peel back and away from them, farther back the way they came. There were murmurs of ‘good luck’ and ‘be careful’, and as their teachers joined the other adults behind them, Miss Inoue gave them an encouraging smile. 

“Don’t forget your training,” She said. 

“And try not to die!” Shura called back, cackling. 

Okumura-sensei rolled his eyes. “Ignore her. You’re all more than capable of handling the demon, but call us if you need assistance.”

And with that, Ryuji looked around to find himself and the exwires left, a scattered team of teenagers waiting for the demon that crawled their way. 

He reached down to grab the beads off of his wrist, instead grasping them in his hands as Konekomaru came to his side. Shima unstrapped his k’rik and stood before them, making way for Kamiki, Moriyama and Paku to retreat behind him as they drew their respective summoning and sealing papers. Okumura tentatively took place next to Shima, awkwardness written in lines of tension across his shoulders, but he looked steadfastly ahead at the demon. 

“Everyone remember the plan?” He called. 

His classmates nodded in assent, and that was that. 

The fight was rather shockingly routine. Like Okumura-sensei had said, they were more than able to handle the fight against the will o wisps demon. There were plenty of hitches along the way, of course- most notably how the demon had burned through one of Moriyama’s plant shield and dispelled her greenman, and when it batted aside a holy water grenade like it was playing baseball. But, with the tips the Tottori exorcists gave them, and the plan they created just the day before, the demon was exorcised within an hour. In a way, it almost felt underwhelming. 

In what felt like no time at all, he was peering over Shima’s shoulder at the smoldering remains of the demon, watching the ashes blowing away in the wind. Shima had been the first to celebrate, letting out a resounding whoop that forced a smile out of Moriyama and Konekomaru as well. Kamiki scoffed and rolled her eyes, but the pride in her expression was unmistakeable. 

The exwires had a win under their belt, and even though the fight was near disappointing, Ryuji couldn’t help but feel happiness crop up in his chest as the Tottori exorcists rallied forward to congratulate them. The older exorcists swarmed around them, slapping their backs and laughing out praises. He found himself grinning along with them, getting swept up in the crowd as they started the push back to the train station. There was celebrating all around, and even though he thought it was silly to make such a big deal over such an easy victory, the exorcists were so warm and inviting that he couldn’t help but be dragged along. 

As they started the trek out of the desert, the energy died down just long enough for Ryuji to get a moment to himself, a chance to breath. His chest was still warm with pride and contentment, but something niggling at the back of his head had him looking back. 

There Okumura was, far back behind them. He stood alone in the sand, shoulders slumped, face turned back to where the ashes of the demon still laid. When Okumura looked back at the group, there was something in his expression- something fearful, something disturbed. 

Because he was a coward and he knew it, Ryuji turned forward again, before he could make eye contact with Okumura. He gave a small smile to Moriyama when she looked back at him, concerned, but it was the fakest smile he ever thought he’d mustered. 

The warm feeling in his chest had faded to something cold and sickly. 

* * *

Choosing to become a spy in a war was likely one of the most difficult decisions one could make. The constant fear of discovery, the pressure of searching for info, the danger of betraying one side- it was likely to spell certain death for those not ready to handle it. Adding in the duties of becoming a double spy? It was practically a death sentence on its own. If not only physical, the mental and emotional toll of switching between sides, lying your way out of danger, choosing which friend to damn, which enemy to save was enough to tear a person apart. However, if you asked Shima Renzou what the worst part of being a double spy was, he wouldn't give any of the reasons listed above. The worst part of double spying, in his opinion...

...was having to wake up at the ass crack of dawn to give a covert report.

He groaned, rubbing at his eyes as he forced himself out of the comfort of his blankets. A sleepy sort of fuzz obscured his vision as he pulled the sheets off and forced himself out of bed, stretching his arms tiredly above him. Once the haze in his eyes cleared, he peered over at Bon, who was still passed out in his own bed. Lucky for him, Konekomaru had offered to room with Takara (who had, oddly, chose not to involve himself in the will o wisp fight), which left Shima with Bon, who slept so heavy that you couldn't wake him up if you banged pots and pans in his face.

Renzou didn't bother to change out of his pajamas, too lazy to tug on any sort of regular clothes. He only tucked the separated pieces of his k'rik into his sweatpants pockets, pulling a hoodie out of the bag by his bed to tug over his t-shirt. With that, he snuck out of their room and into the dark hallway, towards the stairs.

Luckily, most of the exorcists in the Tottori branch were hidden away in their rooms, likely sound asleep. The only people awake were a few late night workers, who only glanced up and waved at him as he made his way out of the building. He was pretty surprised to have made it out with only a couple of smiles and sleepy greetings- this was way easier compared to sneaking out of True Cross.

Of course, he could give his clearance to leave if he really needed to, but it was much more fun to sneak out the old fashion way.

As he walked down the streets, the punishingly hot sun of the day had faded away to a much cooler night, and he rolled his sleeves up to his elbows as a soft breeze swept past. The night was pretty peaceful, with only the quiet, muted sounds of occasional night owls and an alley cat here or there. He was too deep in the city to be able to hear any cicadas or crickets, thank God, but he found himself strangely missing their noisy drone as he slipped into the alleyway.

"So," He started, nonchalantly. "To who do I owe the pleasure of-"

"Address me properly," A feminine voice interrupted, cool but sharp.

Renzou stopped, eyes wide, as a shiver ran down his back. He recognized that voice. He only had the misfortune of meeting her a handful of times outside of just seeing her around Lucifer, but he'd know her anywhere- the demon king of fire, Iblis.

Because he wasn't stupid enough to test her temper when he was definitely out here alone, he dropped down to one knee and looked down to the ground. "I'm sorry, Director. I expected the twins and spoke out of turn."

"You're excused," Her voice came from the darkness once more. "Stand up."

He did so, grimacing as the pieces of his k'rik clanged against each other. He slapped a hand over his pocket and sent Iblis' shadow a sheepish smile, holding the pieces securely in place. Last thing he wanted to do was annoy her a second time, he didn't feel like dying so soon.

It was then that Iblis stepped forward and out of the shadows, amber eyes looking up at him disdainfully. She was only a few inches taller than him, but the cold irritation in her gaze made him feel three feet shorter. He shifted uncomfortably, waiting for her to give him permission to speak. One of the spies he worked with had told him that she had her ego awakening in pre-Islamic Arabia, so to say that she was old-fashioned was a vast understatement.

"Tell me," She started, crossing her arms over her chest. Renzou tried his best not to stare at the skin revealed by her traditional dress, curbing his instinct to flirt. "What is the purpose of a double spy if I'm able to acquire the information I need even before you offer it?"

"Um, with all due respect, I didn't exactly, well, know you were going to be in town. If I did, I would've... um," He trailed off as her eyebrow raised, realizing he was only digging himself deeper into a proverbial hole. "Yeah."

"Of course you wouldn't have known. You're nothing but an underling, you have no business being informed of top secret decisions," She said, frowning. "Double spy or not. If it weren't for your proximity to my younger brother, you wouldn't have known at all."

Renzou could feel sweat rolling down the back of his neck. Should he be apologizing, or something? "...right."

She continued to stare up at him, and something in her gaze made his skin crawl with discomfort. Forget awkward, the situation had suddenly turned damn near terrifying. Somehow, he'd managed to piss her off just by virtue of, what, existing?

When she finally spoke again, he was almost grateful for it. "The Illuminati has lost communication with Satan."

He blinked.

"What?"

"Don't make me repeat myself!" Iblis snapped. Renzou flinched backwards as the flame at the crown of her head and the bottom of her braid flashed, holding his hands up appeasingly. Irritation was written all over her expression, but after a beat, she continued. "Our typical communications channels have come up dry, so we have had to cease all current operations until we can restore contact. We know that the last one to speak to father was Rin himself."

Renzou though back on just the morning before, when purely by chance, he'd caught a glimpse of ink beneath Okumura's shirt as he'd adjusted it.

"I think I might know why," He said, slowly. Iblis raised her eyebrow further, waiting for him to elaborate. "I don't know for sure, but I think Okumura has a contract tattoo on his chest. I tried to tease more info outta him, but he clammed up."

Something in Iblis' eyes lit up, a dangerous sort of heat that seemed to make her irises practically glow. Renzou recognized that look- his superiors got that look every time they decided to send him ass first into danger, just for the temptation of information.

"He and I aren't close enough for me to get any good info yet," He warned.

"That's fine," Iblis waved a hand, before bringing it up to her chin. "I want you to bring him to me."

Nervousness started to twist his stomach. This was starting to sound way above his paygrade. How could he manage to convince Okumura to come with him anywhere, alone? "How do I-"

She quieted him quickly, letting the silence stretch longer. The concentrated look on her face only grew stronger, before she turned that gaze upon him. "I will handle everything. All you will do is provide me with a hostage."

"A hostage?" Renzou squeaked.

"Yes," Iblis moved towards the entrance of the alleyway, wordlessly dismissing him. "As long as there is one there when I need them, and they lure Rin in, I don't care who it is."

"I-" He tried to protest, but she was already out of the alleyway. Even if he managed to catch up to her, he knew there was no way he could convince her to change her mind.

He was stuck figuring out a hostage.

Renzou sighed to himself in the alleyway, before reluctantly making the trek back to the branch headquarters. The night time breeze had felt so pleasant and calming earlier, but now it sent ice-like shivers down his spine each time he remembered his impossible situation. Ugh, this was so ass! His specialty was information, not... covertly kidnapping one of his classmates to use as bait for a trap! And who the hell was he even supposed to use? Forget whether or not he could make himself snatch them, would they even work?

Thanks to that Amaimon guy, the rest of his classmates were walking on eggshells around Okumura. Konekomaru was still terrified of the dude, and even if Moriyama and Bon managed to get their apologies out in time, who was to say that Okumura would be baited by them? Whatever friendship was there had been ripped to shreds. Kamiki was probably the closest option, but in all honesty, he was almost as scared of her as he was of Iblis. Powerful, short tempered women who could and would slaughter him given the chance?

Most of the adults were a no go, not close enough to Okumura for it to work. He might go for Miss Kirigakure, but Renzou wasn't itching to try his hand against one of the Order's best exorcists. There was really only one person left, unfortunately. He felt kind of stupid for taking so long to realize it. They were just about the only person who he felt he could overpower, and who he could trust Okumura would charge headlong into danger for. Maybe it was bad manners to kidnap a guy's twin brother after apologizing to said guy, but, well, he didn't have many choices.

He just hoped Okumura-sensei wouldn't hate him too much for it.

* * *

When Shura woke up, it was to the comforting warmth of Daichi's bed and the darkness of her room.

Slowly, she blinked herself awake, stretching lazily beneath the comforter. Normally, her restless sleeping would've thrown the sheets off hours ago, but Daichi's weighted blankets were good for warmth and for active sleepers, too. She slipped out from the bed and padded across the room to the window, peering out across the city. It had been a while since she got to come and visit Tottori, but cities at night seemed to enthrall her everywhere. She could even see the castle ruins from here, only a block or two away.

_Creak._

Shura was tense in seconds, and fast as lightning, pulled a kunai from a seal hidden in the crook of her elbow. There was a figure coming through the doorway, amber eyes glowing softly in the dark. Tension had her frozen in place, the air thick enough to cut.

And then a cloud in the sky moved, casting moonlight over the room and across the figure's face.

"Daichi," She sighed, relief relaxing her muscles.

Daichi smiled apologetically at Shura, closing the door quietly behind her. She was still dressed in her heavy exorcist coat, but as Shura moved to sit down on the window seat, she gathered up her sleeping clothes and made towards the bathroom. Shura waited patiently for her, staring out at the night skyline.

A few minutes later, Daichi left the bathroom, clicking the light off behind her and setting her folded clothes in the laundry hamper. She crossed the room, dark hair cascading loosely over her shoulders as she leaned down to press a kiss to Shura's forehead. She reached out, looping an arm around Daichi's waist and holding her close. For a second, they were both quiet, looking out the window as she traced gentle fingers through red-and-yellow hair.

"What has you up so late?" Daichi asked, softly.

Shura turned a grin back up at her. "I could ask ya the same thing."

"Well, only one of us is the on-duty exorcist here," she chuckled. "The other should be sleeping."

Shura only hummed, and turned her cheek against the soft material of her lover's shirt. Daichi's hand stilled in her hair, leaving the comforting weight of her fingers against her scalp. It was intimate, almost uncomfortably intimate sometimes. She knew Daichi had her heart in her hands, knew it was too late to try and stop this from going any further. Daichi knew her time was limited, and stayed with her anyways. If she was willing to endure the eventual heartbreak, then Shura would let her do what she wanted.

And, if she was being honest, it was nice to have the company.

"...were you thinking about Fujimoto?"

Nevermind. Shura's expression fell flat. "Well, now I am."

Daichi chuckled and pet her head again. "Sorry, lovely."

"'s alright," She looked away from the window and towards the bed. "Back to bed?"

Daichi nodded, and with that, she stood from the window seat, and the two of them made their way back towards the bed. She crawled in first, sighing happily as the now-cooled sheets brushed up against her skin. The bed dipped as Daichi joined her, and she wiggled closer to the raven-haired woman to tangle their legs together. Shura leaned her head on Daichi's shoulder, an arm across her waist, and then the two of them were settled.

The room was pleasantly quiet, and Daichi's breathing beneath her jaw was enough to lure her back into sleepiness. Even so, now the topic of Shiro was on her mind, and she couldn't let it go.

Reluctantly, she broke the silence. "I dunno know I'm gonna look him in the eye when we get back. It's shit enough havin' to be stuck with both his kids."

"You'll do it the same way you always do," Daichi's voice was colored with amusement. "With a couple shots of whiskey and your typical bravado."

That made her smile, but it didn't take long to fade. "This is different. He's different."

"In a good way?"

"In a... way," She said, frowning. "Like I don't even know him anymore. And I've known that bastard almost as long as I've been alive. Even when everyone left, he was here, and now-"

Daichi's hand was soft on Shura's bare shoulder as she choked up. "He's leaving you, too."

"Yeah," She whispered, because in a way, saying it out loud just made everything feel painfully more real. "I never trusted anyone as much as I trusted Shiro. He means damn near everythin' to me. I need him, but... he doesn't need me, and I don't even know if I mean anythin' to him."

Daichi hummed, pressing a kiss to her temple. She leaned up on her elbows and over Shura, feathering more kisses over Shura's eyelids, to her cheeks, down to one final kiss to her lips. She pulled back, eyes dark but kind.

"He's been with you since you were a kid," She murmured. "If he didn't care for you, he wouldn't have stayed with you so long."

"Maybe back then, but he's got his brats to focus on these days."

"Ohh, lovely," A smile spread across Daichi's face. "Are you feeling left out?"

Shura scowled and shoved her face away as she giggled, flipping over onto her stomach to bury her face in the pillows.

"Aw, come on, I was only kidding!" She felt Daichi drape over her back, rubbing her cheek against Shura's back. "I'm sorry, forgive me?"

Shura only huffed, and ignored her. "Nope. Ya lost cuddle privileges. I'm kickin' you out."

"But then who will show you our hidden alcohol stash? You won't have any more until you get back to Tokyo."

She paused at that, and twisted around to glare weakly at Daichi. "Fine."

She kissed Shura's nose, smiling. "Thank you. Now, where were we?"

"Ugh. Do we gotta talk about him now?"

"When do you propose we talk about him?" Daichi asked, and at her silence, cocked her eyebrow knowingly. "Exactly. I know you won't talk to anyone about this, much less him. Let me be the one to pester you, okay? Tell me about it."

"There ain't much more to it," She said, quiet. "They're his kids. They need him more than I do, 's stupid to act like I gotta be one of his priorities."

"Why don't you talk to him about it? Let him know how you feel?" Daichi suggested. "Then you'll know for sure. But as long as you keep it to yourself, you're breaking your own heart before he even knows he has it."

Shura nodded minutely, but didn't say anything after that.

"You don't have much time left," Her lover murmured. "Set things right now, and go out knowing you made the best of things."

That had always been a point of argument between them. Daichi knew about her deal with Hachiro, about the early expiration date stamped over Shura's soul. She would argue that Shura should spend the rest of her life surrounded by those she loved, making the most of what she had left so she could leave life with a smile on her face. Shura didn't see the point. Why make so many connections just to break as many hearts when she died? If she let herself get attached, could she make herself let go when it came time?

It was lonely trying to live life without anyone by her side, but it was for the best, in the end. She knew that. She lived by that.

Even so, she couldn't let go of Shiro. Couldn't let go of how he'd saved her as a kid, tried his best to give her a new life, supported and loved her even knowing that her life was so limited.

Shura never had a father. But she had Shiro.

"I can't fuckin' believe this all boils down to daddy issues," She growled into her pillow.

Daichi chuckled, the sound vibrating against her back. Neither of them tried to say anything after that, letting the conversation slip off into the night as the minutes passed by. Eventually, sleep claimed them both, and that was that.

When she woke the next morning, she was alone again, but the blankets had been pulled up over her shoulders. The blinds were half drawn, dimming the bright sun. She blinked up at the window, and started her day.

The Tottori exorcists parted before her, some with friendly waves, others with quiet nods. Some were milling about, but others were walking with purposes, dutiful looks on their faces. She recognized one of her drinking buddies, and pulled the half demon woman aside.

"Yo, Ohashi," She greeted, and Ohashi gave her a fanged grin. "Where's everyone buzzin' off to?"

"Mission came in, back in the desert," Ohashi explained. "The team on follow-up duty after the will o wisp found a salamander den, figured it might be a bit too much for greenie exwires."

"Ha! Probably."

"You gonna come along? We could use the back up."

Shura hummed to herself, thinking. It would probably be better for herself to stay back, so she could have that talk with the exwires like she told the chicken she would. "Yukio would probably be bett-"

"Aw, c'mon, Shura! It's been a while since we had a ladies mission out," Ohashi poked her ribs with a sharp nail, eerily accurate as always. "I'll pay for drinks if you do?"

Well...

_Sorry, Yukio. I'll get that talk in later._

"Hell yeah, I'm in."

"Yes!" Ohashi cheered, pumping a fist up into the air. "And don't even worry about the kids, there's another will o wisp infestation in the castle ruins that they can get rid of to keep 'em busy. They'll be fine!"

Even better. Ladies mission out, then!


	13. a premonition, a failed apology, and a final reveal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAA I'm so extremely psyched to be able to bring you guys this chapter!! Mysteries get solved and even more mysteries get revealed! >:D I don't wanna spoil it any, so please enjoy the chapter!

Shiro found himself waking up to the sharp scent of alcohol and the searing brightness of white lights.

Before he even opened his eyes fully, instinct had him taking stock of where he was. He recognized the cheap feeling of a hospital gown, the thin sheets pulled up over his torso. There was the familiar sting of an IV in the back of his hand, a thin pillow beneath his head, and a dull but pulsing ache in his stomach. The beeping of a heart monitor met his ears, and with the whir of machines close by him, he knew exactly where he was.

The lab.

The heart monitor picked up, and adrenaline pumped quick and hard through his veins. He forced himself upright, ignoring the fierce ache in his stomach, and took stock of what he could see of the room. What he saw had relief coursing back through him so strongly that he almost fell back to the bed. This wasn't the lab, just a hospital. Likely True Cross Hospital, but he wasn't sure.

"Finally awake, then?" Came a familiar, disinterested voice.

Shiro let out a tired sigh. Dragulesc.

He looked up at the man, who was studying the vital signs that flashed across the monitor by Shiro's head. "Your healing has slowed significantly. When did this first start?"

"Hello to you, too," Shiro grumbled, wiggling backwards on the bed to lean against the wall and take the pressure off of his abdomen. "Where am I?"

"You don't remember?" Dragulesc asked, voice neutral. Shiro nodded, and at that, the doctor looked down to him, a hint of confusion in his expression that quickly shifted back to neutrality. "You were on a mission with your brigade, against a ghoul infestation of a graveyard, I believe. As for why Americans insist on burying their dead even in Japan, I have no idea, but a tamer on your team lost their nerve, and their familiar attacked you. Perhaps you should have said tamer's membership reconsidered."

"Aww, you do care."

"Hardly," Dragulesc snorted. "Your body is useless to me if you die mangled and destroyed."

"Friendly," Shiro muttered to himself, rolling his eyes. Dragulesc moved to sit down in one of the visitor chairs and pulled up a clipboard that he began to scribble on. "What kinda familiar?"

Dragulesc looked up at him, then back down again. "A hobgoblin. It’s embarrassing that you would fall to something so weak. Why did you allow it to even get close to you?"

Shiro frowned as he tried to remember the details of the mission. "I don't know, I think it just slipped past me. Wasn't expecting friendly fire."

"Even so," He set the clipboard down, eyes sharp behind his glasses. "Your reflexes have dulled. Your healing is slowing. Have you given any consideration to end of life procedures?"

"End of-" Shiro's eyes widened, the very thought hitting him almost as hard as the goblin. 

He... hadn't. As a child, he always thought he'd die at the hands of Section 13, or later on, at the hands of a demon who managed to get one up on him. Then, he had the twins, and dying wasn't an option. Dying still wasn't an option- he still had his boys to take care of, Shura, the students, the priests.

Was his time really coming to an end so soon?

"It shouldn't surprise you," Dragulesc said, short. "The clones were never made for longevity. You were made to withstand the power of a possession, not your own independent life."

Shiro was silent, eyes falling down to stare at his hands. One bandaged, one missing fingers. He knew his retirement was nearing, but death?

"...I believe you may still have a few years left," If he were dumber, he might've said that the doctor sounded softer, almost kinder. "Given, it may be less if you continue on your typical high stakes missions."

"I'm barely into my fifties," Shiro murmured. "Doesn't seem like the normal age to be thinkin' about my body giving out."

"You aren't normal," Dragulesc reminded him. "Perhaps, in a way, this is God's trade for our creation of life. A brighter, more magnificent existence, but a shorter one as a consequence."

He chuckled, though he didn't feel the humor. "I doubt that'll stop you bastards from trying again."

"Likely not. The folly of humans is a sin we never seem to learn from," For the first time since Shiro had met him, Dragulesc smiled, but it was rueful and dry. "But I doubt another lab will start again in our lifetime."

"I'll be happy to see your chicken shit brain die with you," He said, entirely honest.

"Not before I perform your autopsy," Dragulesc remarked.

"As long as you cremate me properly once you're done. Give my ashes to my boys."

He expected Dragulesc to snort, say something derisive, but instead, the man only gave a small nod. "I can see if that can be arranged."

Shiro didn't know what to say to that.

He hated Dragulesc, he knew that. He hated the man for being such a freak, for working on Section 13, for shamelessly gunning after his body like he was just some final experiment for Dragulesc to rip apart. He hated the man for threatening his boys, whether he was serious or not. There was too much bad blood, too many days spent screaming in restraints, grieving over Yuri, holding his nose and pushing through the checkups even when they made his skin crawl. There was too much for him to let go of, but now, it felt almost like they were connected.

Two men out of their prime, out of their time, and out of years left.

"I wish you weren't such a bastard."

Dragulesc blinked, and looked down at his own hands.

If he squinted, he could see the shadow of an imprint left behind by a wedding ring on the doctor's fingers.

_Please don't say it._

"Sometimes, I do as well."

Shiro couldn't sit through it anymore.

He kicked the sheets off of his legs and stood, ripping the IVs and monitors out of and off of his skin. Dragulesc said nothing, only looking down at the clipboard. His coat was slung over the end of the bed, and he pulled it over the hospital gown, buttoning it up as he left the room. The nurses and doctors scrambled out of his way as he made his way towards the roof access steps, not stopping even when he heard calls and shouts of his name.

The stairs were a chore to get up, only increasing his discomfort and irritation as it reminded him of his flagging energy. He let the door slam shut behind him, bee-lining directly towards the edge of the roof. He stopped just short of the ledge, freezing in the late evening sun. He'd gone on that mission late at night. How long had he been asleep?

The emotions tearing at his chest came to a fever pitch, and with that, he shoved his hand into his jacket and rifled around for the hidden pocket. The seams of the pocket tore as he ripped out the lighter, and the cigarette alongside it. He stared down at the filter, the rich scent of tobacco hitting his nose. He'd sworn he wouldn't smoke anymore. He had been clean for fifteen, almost sixteen years. As long as the twins had been alive.

Shiro flicked the lighter, lit the end of the cigarette, and took a drag that tasted like ash and ichor.

The breeze felt kinder then, cooler, ruffling his hair and sending the cigarette smoke off to the side. He leaned against the edge of the roof, looking out at the academy as nicotine and exhaustion filled his lungs.

"Well, that didn't last long, did it?"

Shiro wasn't surprised to hear Mephisto's voice. The demon king always seemed to know how to show up exactly where he wasn't wanted. He only glanced over at Mephisto, taking a long breath of the cigarette to blow it in his direction.

"Honestly," Mephisto scowled, waving the smoke out of his face. "If you must return to that deplorable habit of yours, at least invest in some quality cigars.”

Shiro ignored the bait. "I think I'll miss you the least."

"Pardon?"

"I'm dying," He clarified, looking back out at the city line. "Dragulesc thinks I only got a couple years left, less if I keep going on missions."

Mephisto was quiet for a long moment. "I don't know how much worth you should put in the words of a man who has a vested interest in your death."

"He's right. My body's fallin' apart now."

"I could give you more-"

"I don't want anything you're offering," Shiro cut in. "I'm sure I don't want whatever price tag's attached."

"Nothing in life is free, Shiro," Mephisto said, but didn't sound as gleeful about it as he usually might. "But there are things I can do to help you."

He brought the cigarette to his lips. "...no. If it's my time, then... I've been runnin' away from death long enough. I don't want to die, but I don't think I can do what it takes to keep living."

A few beats of silence stretched.

"For what it's worth, I'll hate to see you go."

"Thanks," Shiro snorted. "I think. Pretty sure you're more upset over losing a game piece than me personally."

"Both can apply," Mephisto grinned a bit at that. "As a friend, I'll miss you. But in the greater scheme of the game, pieces come and go. There is more at stake in this war than one man's life, no matter how magnificent."

That brought a frown to his face, and he let his cigarette hand droop as he looked to Mephisto. "I want you to promise me something. No demon deals, no contracts, no trades. Just a request."

"I can't promise what you might ask, but I will hear you."

"Keep my boys safe," Even as Mephisto made an aborted attempt at a laugh, he continued, solemn. "I don't think I'll live to see the end of this whole shitty war. I can't look after them for much longer. I know you got your own plans and all, but... for me, keep them alive, if you can."

Mephisto still looked incredulous, and Shiro knew it was a tall order, to ask a demon of chaos to leave others unscathed. But... if his time was really coming to an end, no matter how soon, he had to look after the future of his boys. Rin and Yukio were all that mattered, now. 

"I'll try my best," The demon king said. Shiro wasn't sure if he actually trusted Mephisto, but he looked somewhat serious for once. And, well, it wasn't like he actually had any power to enforce the promise. He'd just have to hope that Mephisto kept his end.

He took another breath of the cigarette, and left it on that. The smoke caught on something in his throat, and he coughed the nicotine out, frowning at the cigarette. But one cough turned into another, and more, and in seconds he was fighting for a breath. Mephisto rolled his eyes but handed him a handkerchief to cover his mouth with. In a minute or so, the fit subsided, leaving his body feeling weak and sore. His abdomen ached fiercely. Shiro scowled at nothing in particular- he hadn't smoked in years, where the hell had all of that come from?

He pulled the cloth away from his face, and saw a splatter of dark red blood. Stunned, he looked at the cloth. Mephisto leaned over his shoulder to look as well.

"Perhaps you should reconsider picking your smoking habit up again," He commented.

Shiro only nodded, and found himself leaning against Mephisto. He was tired, and having two of these conversations in one day was tiring him out emotionally as well. The demon king sighed, and reached his arms down to pick Shiro up bridal style. He frowned at Mephisto, who only gave him a pointed look.

"You're simply too much shorter than me for any other way to be effective."

"And you're simply too damn skinny to be pickin' me up like this," He grumbled. Demon kings and their strength, annoying as hell.

"Humans," Mephisto sighed, but there was something fond in it. "Rest, my friend. I'll have you taken off the active mission roster."

_Finally._

* * *

Moriyama looked up at him, wide eyes nervous but eager. "Are you ready?"

Ryuji sighed, but nodded. "As I'm ever gonna be."

It was time to talk to Okumura.

Moriyama knocked on the door to the twins' room, knuckles soft against the wood. Even with as quiet as it was, there was Okumura's voice from the other side of the door- "Come in!"

With a breath and one last look at each other, they opened the door and stepped into the room, closing the door behind them. Okumura-sensei was nowhere to be found, but Okumura was curled over a book at the desk, scribbling something down on a sheet. He looked up when they entered the room, then startled when he saw them. He pulled his sleeves down over his hands, looking somewhat anxious as he turned in the chair to face them.

"Hey," He greeted, and it sounded far more casual than he looked.

"Hi," Moriyama said, giving a small wave. "Suguro and I wanted to talk to you, if that's okay?"

"Um, sure."

She nodded, and Ryuji was a little embarrassed at how he was still practically hiding behind her. She moved to sit down on one of the beds, and he chose to stand nearby, crossing his arms over his chest. He felt something bump against his foot, and looked down to see Moriyama's shoe pressed up against his own. He looked up at her, startled by the contact, but she was looking at Okumura.

"I want to go first, if that's okay," She said, and at both their nods, she continued. "I'm really sorry for... everything. When word got out about your, um, your other dad, I was avoiding you because, well... I was hurt. I thought I was close to you, and Yuki, and I was upset you two hadn't told me. But, I realized that it wasn't fair to you to leave you alone, when you were already struggling. I should've gotten over myself, and I'm sorry."

Okumura blinked, wide-eyed. His mouth opened and closed with no words.

"You don't have to accept my apology," She smiled a bit at him. "I still mean it, even if you can't accept it. It's okay."

Before his nerve could give way, Ryuji blurted out, "Me too. Sorry, I mean. I'm sorry. Ya couldn't've told us, even if ya wanted to. I shouldn'ta held that against you, it was a ‘me’ problem and not a ‘you’ problem, so. I'm sorry too."

The guy didn't seem to even know what to say, and for a second, Ryuji felt bad for overwhelming with both of their apologies at once.

"I..." Okumura's eyebrows furrowed, like he was trying to look for the words to say. His eyes were glimmering. "I thought you guys hated me."

His voice broke at the end, and Moriyama leapt up from the bed to throw her arms around his shoulders. Ryuji watched as Okumura gripped her t-shirt with both hands, leaning his head onto her shoulder. There was the sound of sniffling, and he felt like he really shouldn’t just be standing around so awkwardly. Ryuji shuffled over to both of them, and reached a hand out, unsure of what to do.

And then weeks of playful shoving, teasing, and arguing came back to him, and he rested his hand in Okumura's hair, ruffling it as nonchalantly as he could. He knew how to do this, he just needed a reminder.

"Why?" Came Okumura's muffled voice, hoarse with tears as Moriyama leaned back on her ankles to look up at him.

"Why what?" She asked gently, resting her hands on his knees.

"Why now?" He rubbed furiously at his eyes, trying to compose himself. His voice was a whisper, like he didn't even expect them to hear. "I-I was doing fine, but now- everything's just going to be harder."

"What's going to be harder?" Moriyama looked up at Ryuji, confused, but he didn't know any more than she did. He had theories, but...

Okumura looked conflicted. He pressed his lips closed, then reluctantly spoke again. "...I'm probably not going to pass the test. It's going to suck when I die."

"That ain't gonna happen," Ryuji interrupted firmly. "We'll help you, you're gonna pass that test."

The other boy looked up at him, and there was a long stretch of tension where his blue eyes seemed to be looking for- well, _something_ , but what exactly, Ryuji didn’t know. Whatever Okumura found, however, had a shutter falling over his expression. 

“I can’t risk it.” He said, quiet. “I’m sorry. I can’t accept your apology.”

"What?"

"Okumura!"

"Can you guys leave?" Okumura asked, and when they only sat in stunned silence, he tacked on, "Please?"

Ryuji didn't even know what to say. The guy was seriously shoving them away, just because he could be executed after this exam? Because he'd given up on his chances of living? He didn't know whether to be angry or upset, but like most times, he settled for angry.

"Like hell!" He grabbed Okumura by the collar and yanked him up to look him in the eye, seething. "You can't die, because we're gonna kick Satan's ass, and we're gonna do it _together!"_

"Suguro!" Moriyama's hands grabbed the sleeve of his shirt, alarmed.

The half demon looked an equal mix of surprised and yet resigned, somehow. His hand was soft on Ryuji's wrist. "I'm probably gonna go to Gehenna when I die anyways, I'll just meet you there, right?"

"No, that shit ain't good enough! We're doin' it as a team, unless you're on _his_ side now, huh?"

"What?" Okumura's expression turned revolted. "Hell no! I hate that-"

His throat seemed to seize, and he coughed, letting go of Ryuji to rub at his neck. Ryuji let him go, and Moriyama was fast to grab his arm and steady him. When Okumura looked back up at him, there were lines of exhaustion scored underneath his eyes, something in those blue irises that was dimmed.

"Look," He started, quietly. "I'm no good at school. I flunked out of middle school, and high school and the cram classes ain't going any better. My whole life has been damn near hand selected to screw me over, and I get that now. Don't go makin’ this harder for me than it has to be. Please.”

Ryuji didn't want to give up. He hated failure, hated living with it, hated accepting it even more. He didn't want to give up on Okumura, not when his fatalistic attitude got on his nerves. But the guy seemed resigned to dying. Like he had accepted it already, and Ryuji didn't know what to say to that.

He didn't want Okumura to die.

He didn't know why, but everything in him rebelled against the very thought.

"Yer passin' that test," He said it like he was speaking it into existence, because he needed it to. He needed Okumura to live. "And that's final."

Something in Okumura's expression broke, something desperate and disappointed all at once. Like he had expected, or wanted something different. Like he wanted Ryuji to agree with him.

The thought made him nauseous.

He turned on his heel, ignoring Moriyama's attempts to stop him, and made a line straight for the door. He couldn't stay in here with that guy, who was already resigned to his death before the exam had even come. He reached for the door, but at that same moment, the doorknob twisted and the familiar face of Okumura-sensei poked in.

"Oh, here you all are," He commented. Ryuji stepped back to let him in the room, as Okumura-sensei looked a bit confused at them. "Is everything alright?"

He didn't speak, and neither did Okumura. Moriyama was the one to answer. "We're fine, Yuki, just talking."

Okumura-sensei didn't look as if he entirely believed them, but continued anyways. "Most of the Tottori exorcists have been dispatched to the desert for an assignment, but the branch head is allowing us to handle another will o wisp infestation in the castle ruins. We'll be leaving in an hour or so to stake out the ruins, so start preparing your things."

He only nodded, and maneuvered past Okumura-sensei to get out the door. The hallways of the branch were quiet with the lack of exorcists, save for his footsteps thunking across the wooden floors. He was irritated, and snappish, and he knew that, so when the door to his and Shima's room came up, he strode past it and towards the door that led out back. The exorcists had set aside a garden area for herb growing, as well as a place for tamers to take their familiars, and right now it sounded like the perfect place to go and just... sit for a few minutes, until he could get his emotions under control.

The fresh air of the afternoon hit his skin and cooled the anger that had been boiling up, and as the door closed behind him, he made his way further into the garden. There was a bench up against the fence twining around the area, and luckily, with most of the Tottori exorcists gone, it was completely vacated. 

He took a seat on the bench, leaned against the fence behind it, and breathed.

Only a few minutes had passed when he heard the door to the building open and close again, quietly. He glanced over and saw Moriyama standing there, looking hesitant yet determined at the same time. She made her way over to his area, and sat down gingerly on the bench alongside him.

She let a polite silence stretch out before she spoke.

"I'm sorry," Moriyama murmured. "For pushing you into apologizing."

He shook his head. "'s fine. I probably wouldn'ta apologized if ya didn't make me."

She nodded, and looked down at her lap. "...I don't know what to do about Rin."

He closed his eyes.

"Me either."

"Should we tell Yuki? Or their dad?"

At that, he hesitated. Okumura-sensei was their age, too, but he was an accomplished exorcist, and their dad was the Paladin. If anyone could rectify the situation, it would be them, right? But if Mr. Fujimoto could've fixed things, wouldn't he have done so already? The guy was their dad, surely he would've stepped in if he could've. Did that mean Mr. Fujimoto couldn't do anything about it?

If the Paladin couldn't do anything, then what could they do? A team of exwires, still in high school?

The feeling of uselessness was quickly starting to grow stronger.

"I dunno if there's anything they can do," He admitted. "We really only got one option."

"Help him pass the test?" She guessed, looking up at him. He nodded, and her mouth twisted into a frown. "How can we help him when he doesn't want to be helped?"

He looked down at her, and for the first time in a while, felt determination rise up. "Same way I got us to be friends the first time. We bully him into it."

At that, her expression lightened and she giggled, the sound like windchimes. "How did that even work last time?"

"Because Okumura doesn't actually want us to ditch him," He replied, and though he smiled alongside her, he was being serious. "He's forcin' himself into this loner role, he doesn't really want it. So he's easy enough to wear down, if you got the patience."

"I'll just have to follow you, then," She nodded, resolutely. "I'm... not really good at this stuff, you know? Being, well, assertive and all."

"Well, we're friends now, so I'm sure I'll rub off on ya."

That statement alone had Moriyama's entire expression lighting up with excitement.

"I-I'll do my best!"

* * *

Rin could feel that Suguro was still irritated with him. That, or determined, and even when they were friends, he still struggled to tell the difference. He might've been the son of Satan, but Suguro was the firey one. Brash, angry, righteous, a towering flame that terrified him with each inch that got closer. He had accepted what was happening, that he only had months left, but he knew Suguro. He knew the other boy wasn't ever content to just sit back and let things be. 

It wouldn't be so much of a problem if he weren't so smart. If anyone was going to ruin this for him, it would be Suguro.

So he had to stay away. As much as it hurt, and as much as he desperately wanted his friend back, he had to stay away.

_Doesn't mean I gotta be happy about it, though,_ he thought to himself, kicking idly at a stone on the mountain. Yukio looked up at him from where he was crouched down next to one of the stone walls, an equal mix concerned and irritated.

"This is a historical site, Rin, don't be rude," He reprimanded, but grew softer after that. "What's wrong? Is it about Shiemi and Suguro?"

Ugh, nail on the head. Rin winced- his brother was too damn perceptive. "Yes, and no. I'm just... thinking."

"About?"

"Do we have to talk about it now?" He whined. He couldn't handle both Yukio and the others and everything else at the same time. "Shouldn't we be, I dunno, doing something?"

"I'll give you a pass for now, only because I think this is the first time you've put serious thought into a mission," Yukio said wryly, looking back down to the scorch mark he'd been poking at. "We're just investigating for now. We know will o wisps are present, but in an area like this, there could be any number of other demons. It's good practice to cover your bases so you don't end up blindsided with an attack."

"Right," Rin murmured. He wasn't listening, not a lot, because demons and exorcisms or not, he had never been good at sitting through lectures.

"Yo, teach!"

He startled a bit at the sound of Shima's voice, but luckily, Yukio was looking over at his classmate, and not at Rin. "Yes?"

"Any chance we could take a look inside Jinpukaku?" He glanced over to see Shima standing with Miwa, pointing at the white mansion with a grin. "Seems like a cool place to check out."

"He means that we think the wisps could be hiding in there," Miwa called, directing an exasperated look towards the pink haired boy next to him. "Should we investigate?"

"Well, it's within Tottori's jurisdiction..." Yukio murmured. He stood from where he was kneeling on the ground, and Rin silently prayed that he would say no. Trapped in a building with everyone he was awkward around? That sounded like hell. "Alright. Wait for us all to regroup, then we'll head in."

Shit. He resisted the urge to groan, because he knew that would definitely make his brother suspicious. Instead, he just dragged his feet as Yukio led him over to the other exwires, where the girls and Suguro were already waiting. He avoided looking at Suguro, or Moriyama, but as they turned to head inside the mansion, Kamiki made a beeline directly for his side. Paku was close behind her, giving him a friendly smile.

"I got something to say to you," Kamiki started, and even though Rin knew she had no problem with him, he still felt nervousness bolt down his spine. "I'm sorry."

...what was with everyone today?!

"Paku pointed out that I was being an ass," Kamiki continued, a flush growing on her cheeks before she huffed and looked back to the other girl. "Could you explain? You're better at it than me."

Paku sighed, but indulged her. "She may have started out defending you, but I noticed it was turning into her just picking fights and using you as an excuse."

"Which wasn't nice," Kamiki grumbled. "So, I'm sorry."

"I, um, thanks?" He didn't know how to navigate this, why did everyone decide to do all of this on the same day? "It's okay."

"Are you okay, Okumura?" Paku leaned in front of Kamiki as they passed through the doors of the mansion, concerned.

"I'm fine, just a little overwhelmed," He replied, trying to plaster on a believable smile. "Just.. got a couple of apologies today."

Maybe the somewhat honest answer would throw them off. Whether it did so or not, he didn't have the time to find out, because their group came to a stop before Yukio. He took the chance to look around the mansion, letting the awe and fascination wash over him (a welcome break from everything else he’d been feeling that day). There was a huge wooden staircase before them, and the architecture was so much different than anything he'd ever seen before. The mansion looked nothing like any of their Japanese homes or buildings.

He thought he remembered something about this house being American- was this really how they lived?

"Now," Yukio started, his voice carrying easily over their class. "Don't forget that this mansion still serves as a museum of sorts. The Tottori exorcists arranged to have it cleared for the day, and we have permission to search it thoroughly, but do so carefully. Don't break anything, and try not to engage any demons directly. Immobilize them, or find their fatal verse to be rid of them quickly and cleanly. Understood?"

"Yes, sensei."

"Good. Find a partner, and start searching."

"I-I'll partner up with Okumura!" Came Moriyama's voice, nervous but firm.

He looked up at her, startled, as did the rest of the class. She crossed the group to stand by him, looking resolutely up at Yukio even as Rin couldn't help but stare at her. Her cheeks were red, hands trembling by her sides, but she wasn't backing down.

"I'm with Paku," Kamiki said, thankfully taking the pressure off of them.

"I'll partner with Bon," Miwa sighed. "I need a break from Shima."

"So cruel!" Shima cried, and flopped himself onto Yukio's shoulder. "Okumura-sensei, won't you comfort my broken heart?"

Yukio's eye twitched severely, and Rin would've laughed if Shima still weren't so unsettling to him.

"Well... we'll begin, then."

With that, the exwires separated into different directions with their partners. Yukio and Shima went somewhere up the staircase along with Paku and Kamiki, while he and the other three took opposite sections of the bottom floor. Moriyama stayed close to his side the entire time, still red-faced and silent but practically on his heels. He resisted the urge to sigh as they stepped into the fancy dining room, but the silence of the room as he absently searched the walls was growing unbearable.

"Um, Moriyama..." He started.

"Oh!" She startled, eyes widening. "You can call me Shiemi!"

He blinked, then felt his own cheeks grow hot. "Uh, sure? Um. Maybe we should split, to see the whole room?"

"Split up?" Shiemi looked confused, then shook her head. "But you don't have your sword, right? How are you going to defend yourself if a demon pops up?"

"I'm pretty strong," He assured her.

(Even if he did have his sword, though, he wouldn't use it. He didn't like using kurikara, or his flames. He didn't even like looking at his tail, or his ears, or his teeth. It was why he kept his tail belted firmly to his stomach, where it was sore and cramped and rubbed raw, but at least out of sight. Everything from Satan, hidden away where nobody could see it.)

"Strong or not, you don't have a weapon," Shiemi insisted. "It's my job to protect you. Nii? Can you come here, please?"

With her request, there was a tiny poof of smoke, and her greenman appeared on her shoulder. Before Rin could even process what she was doing, she was talking again.

"I had him out to explore the ruins, but you'll hang out with Okumura for now, right?" She cooed at the greenman, who squeaked back at her and jumped onto his shoulder. Nii's scent of aloe and grass drifted up to his nose as the greenman made himself comfortable on Rin's shoulder. "Good! Now we're set."

Rin was too stunned to protest as Shiemi made her way further into the dining room, shoulders held up stiffly. Her sudden boldness completely blindsided him, but even with that, he could see that the tips of her ears were bright red. Well... he couldn't really be mad at her for that. He'd put up with it for now, but cut everything off later. It really would be easier if he didn't let himself get close to them again.

There wasn't much to talk to beyond that, and the two of them fell into a more companionable, but still somewhat awkward silence. An hour or two passed as they checked the room and each of the crevices for any signs of demons. Nii took the time to search the vents, while they moved to other rooms and looked from top to bottom. There were dozens upon dozens of cabinets and closets to check and clear, and the sun had started to wane while they were checking the first floor. Once the first floor had been clear, they (rather uncomfortably) reconvened with Suguro and Miwa, and agreed across the four of them that there was nothing suspicious to be found.

They decided to give the first floor a second look over, since the sun was setting and the other two groups still hadn't come down from the top floor. The four of them double checked the floor together, and thankfully, Shiemi gave him a break and decided to walk closer to both Suguro and Miwa.

It was when they were checking one of the sitting rooms that Rin first smelled it. The faintest hint of smoke and wood, a scent that had him pausing. He sniffed the air, and Moriyama glanced back at him, confusion written across her expression.

"Do you smell that?" He asked her. "Smoke?"

She frowned, and tilted her head back as she sniffed the air. "Oh, now that you mention it..."

"They probably found the will o wisp upstairs," Suguro turned back to say. "If they ain't called us for back up, they're probably fine. Plus, they got Okumura-sensei."

"That's true," Shiemi nodded. "Should we keep going?"

After a second, he nodded too, and the four of them kept walking. After Suguro said it, he felt a little silly- Yukio was the better exorcist here, and with how easy that will o wisp and Jack demon had been the other day, he definitely had it handled.

They continued searching rooms, and the scent of smoke never really went away. Instead, as the minutes passed, the scent only grew stronger, until it irritated his sensitive nose enough to make him sneeze.

"Suguro? Maybe we should go check and see if they're okay?" Shiemi suggested, nervous.

When Suguro turned back on the group, his expression was just as anxious, and the group of exwires wordlessly mad their way back to the staircase. Rin felt his stomach twisting, and reached a hand up to bite one of his nails. He knew there was no reason to be scared, not really, but things always seemed to go wrong when it came to him, and, well... he had a feeling something was about to go wrong.

And it did, in the form of a chunk of burning wood crashing down in front of them.

Shiemi yelped as the wood splintered against the floor, bright orange flames crawling from the chunk to the carpet. Rin looked up to see a hole in the ceiling, and just through it, a crackling fire that only seemed to be getting bigger by the second.

"What the hell-!" Suguro yelped as more wood fell from the ceiling, and he backed both Shiemi and Miwa up until the four of them were packed close together and away from the falling debris.

"It's a fire!"

He startled at the shout, looking up to see Kamiki at the top of the stairs with Paku's arm pulled over her shoulder. She was panicked, her skirt singed and smudged with soot. Paku was clutching a burn on her thigh, looking equally afraid.

"There was a demon, or something!" Kamiki called, helping Paku down the stairs as best she could. A white fox twined around her feet- the byakko. "The whole top floor's on fire, we gotta get out!"

"How did it burn so quickly?!"

"No time, we gotta go!"

"Paku- she's hurt!"

A crashing noise split the conversation and shook the building, and before Rin could even process what was happening, a deafening roar rang out.

"A dragon?!" Miwa squeaked, grabbing onto Suguro.

"No time, go!"

Shiemi darted forward to help Kamiki with Paku, and the group of exwires scrambled from the staircase back to the door. Suguro kicked the door open, and Rin found himself bringing up the rear as a head of pink hair ducked into their party.

"That's a fuckin' dragon!" Shima screeched, holding his hands over his head. "Oh God, that's a fuckin' dragon!"

"A what?!" Rin couldn't believe it, those things only existed in fairy tales!

But as he skidded to a stop and turned to look back at the mansion, his ears fell flat against his head, muscles locking with fear at the beast perched on the roof. Great claws tore into the roof of the mansion, billowing fire blasting forth from the maw of... a chicken?

"You idiot!" Suguro snapped behind him, and he could hear Shima squeak. "That's a basan, not a dragon! Dumbass!"

"What the hell's the difference?!"

"Its fatal verse, for a start!"

"Wait," Rin's stomach dropped as he looked back at the exwires, counted each head present. Six, including himself, which made seven. "...where's Yukio?"

The group turned to face Shima, who looked just as confused. "He was right behind me!"

"You left him?!"

"Shima!"

Rin didn't hesitate a second longer. He dashed back for the mansion, ignoring how the exwires called after him. Fear and adrenaline rushed cold and fast through his veins, eyes wide as he burst through the doors and back into the building. The fire had turned the mansion into a furnace, blisteringly hot as burning debris and wood fell left and right. He climbed up the stairs as fast as he could, hopping over the burned holes and hunks of wood.

The first room was empty, save for crackling flames and destroyed furniture. Each room he checked made his fear rise, his breath quicken, his hands shake.

_Yukio, Yukio, Yukio, where's Yukio?!_ He threw doors open, screamed his brother's name and felt the tears grow when nobody responded. _He's my baby brother, please, God, don't take him yet!_

There was only one room left that he hadn't checked, and the fire grew hottest and biggest here. Heat and flames burned through his shoes, seared his skin even as the wounds hissed and healed. He ignored the white hot pain of his skin burning, tearing through the splintered door and into the room.

_There!_

He could've cried in relief, chest heaving with emotion and exertion, when he finally saw him.

And then froze when he saw who else was in there.

A woman sat on the floor at the end of the room, utterly unbothered by the flames that curled around her. There was even fire in her hair, a dark braid that tumbled down her back. Her eyes were a bright amber, but calm and disinterested as she looked up at him. Yukio was sprawled across her lap, out cold, with blood running down from his hairline.

Rin swallowed harshly, ignored the urge to grab his brother. _Please, please be alive._

"So, I finally meet him," The woman spoke, her voice lightly accented. "The infamous son of Satan, Okumura Rin."

His voice was raspy, choked with the smoke in his lungs. "How do you know me?"

She only smiled, reached a clawed hand over to brush through Yukio's hair idly. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Iblis, Demon King of Fire, and your elder sister."

"Let him go," He didn't care if she was his sibling, all he cared about was Yukio. His brother was hurt, possibly dying. 

"I cannot," She said, simply. "It is not in my nature to take hostages, especially of my youngest brother, but these circumstances are... special. I have a question to ask of you, and this was the simplest way to assure your honesty. As you were the last to speak to him, only you have the answers I need: Where is Satan?"

Rin felt his stomach drop to the floor

"And I feel as if it shouldn't have to be stated out loud, but..." Her claws, sharp and deadly, delicately traced down from Yukio's hairline to his neck. His heart skipped a beat. A vivid image hit him, of his twin suffocating in his own blood, dying- "It is in your best interest to answer in a timely manner. Father has no use of our youngest brother, after all. So, what is your answer?"

Fine. _Fine._ All that mattered was Yukio. Everything else could go to hell- his little brother wasn’t going to die here. He closed his eyes and poked that writhing mass tucked away in his chest, threw all his fear and anger and desperation at it. 

_You’re wanted,_ he hissed at the presence. 

**_Is that so? Lemme step in for a sec then, kiddo!_ **

A haze of blue blurred his vision, and everything went black. He saw nothing else, save for a visage of Iblis grinning maniacally.

"So that's where he was, ah? You had Satan within you this entire time!"


	14. a rescue, a twist, and a lingering suspicion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I apologize for missing the update yesterday, it simply slipped my mind unfortunately.
> 
> I also have a bit of an announcement. I hate to have to say this, since I was hoping that I wouldn't have to do so after the last time I did so, but 'through rose colored glasses' will once again be going on a break. My rate of chapter creation is just much slower than my rate of chapter updates, and I want to preemptively take a break now before I'm forced into it when I run out of chapters to update. I'm sorry to have to do this, but I appreciate you all's patience in advance. I will likely continue updates after I have finished writing the last chapters, but either way, I promise no hiatuses after this!
> 
> chapter warnings: description of injury, brief character coma, discussion of yukio's mental health,

When Yukio managed to force his eyes open, it was to searing light and a fierce ringing in his ears. His head felt like it was splitting, ash up his nose and in his mouth. He wheezed, but each breath just brought more ash and smoke into his lungs. Someone was dragging him, stumbling down steps and over piles of wood that sent streaks of orange and red across his blurred vision. A groan tore free from his mouth, and he reached a numb hand up to his eyes.

"Yukio?" That was Rin. "Oh thank God. I'm gettin' us out of here, hang on!"

His arm was pulled up over Rin's shoulder, his brother's hand tight around his wrist and free arm somewhere around his waist. Yukio tried to blink the haze out of his eyes, and realized that his glasses were gone. The staircase below them swayed precariously, and he fought back down the bile crawling up his throat as plaster crashed down from above. As their feet hit the last of the steps, he managed to get his feet underneath him, taking some of his weight off of Rin to push them both past the open doors of the mansion.

The fresh air hit him near physically, and he gasped in a breath as his legs finally gave out. He slipped down to the ground and doubled over the grass, hacking out a nauseating mix of saliva and wet soot. Rin's hand was gentle on his back, and for a second he let himself feel weak, fighting for breath and barely holding back tears.

"Yuki?" Another hand reached down, soft in his hair and cool against his neck. "Is he okay?"

"I don't know!" That was Rin again, something tearful and desperate in his voice. "He- He's bleeding, and I-"

"Smoke inhalation," He choked out. "Concus... concussion."

"Don't speak!" Shiemi, that was her, right? "We'll get you help! Nii-"

"No time!"

Yukio barely managed to swallow down his rebelling stomach as the world violently shifted, and suddenly he was in the air, thick arms tight around his knees and back. Whoever was holding him immediately started moving, sending black spots across his vision as he was carried along.

"Don't pick him up so suddenly! He's hurt!"

"We ain't got time to argue, that basan's gonna burn the whole place down!"

A basan? He knew the fatal verse for that.

"Jo... Joel," Why wasn't his mouth working? He knew the words, but his tongue felt heavy, useless. "Joel 3:16... and eight, eighteen."

"What?"

"It's the fatal verse of the basan," Suguro's voice was deep and reverberated against his shoulder- ah, so that was who was carrying him. "Joel 3:16 through 18, right, teach?"

He managed a nod and reached a hand to his waistband, but missed somewhere and hit his thigh instead. He frowned, felt someone's hand settle over his own.

"What do you need, Yukio?" That was Rin's voice, heavy with concern.

"Gun," He managed. "Bullets, right side... holy water."

Thankfully, Suguro understood him. "That'll beat the demon down for a minute! Kamiki, can you fire a gun?"

"I- Jesus, I'll figure it out!"

A hand rustled through his pockets and grabbed the magazine of holy bullets, then hurriedly detached his pistol from his waistband. He heard something like the fiddling of the magazine against the gun, the panting of the exwires around him as they ran. The gun was cocked, and he could feel Suguro twisting his neck back to watch as the _crack!_ of the gun firing rang out. There was a second shot, a third, and then a loud groan from Kamiki.

"I can't fire this thing! My aim is crap!"

Fine. He could do it, then. He could.

He reached for the other gun at his waist, relying on years of learned instincts to replace the magazine inside with one of holy water bullets. With the magazine in place, he cocked the gun and twisted his body around. He looped an arm around Suguro's neck to steady himself, leaned over his shoulder to point the gun at the screeching chicken monster behind them. His aim wasn't going to be much better than Kamiki's- his glasses were gone, his arm jostled with every step Suguro took, and right now, he could barely fight the nausea down long enough to make the hazy impressions of the basan focus back into one.

But there was a split second when the sights centered on the demon, and Yukio didn't hesitate. He pulled the trigger and the shot rang out, the basan screeching as it was hit. He managed three more shots, rapid fire, before his vision blurred out and he had to lean his forehead against Suguro's shoulder to steady himself. His lungs were straining with the exertion, and another fit of coughing brought the taste of ash over his tongue.

"It's distracted now, hide!"

Suddenly he was falling to the ground, his forehead banging into Suguro's neck as stone hit his back.

"Sorry, sensei," Suguro murmured, followed by the feeling of his hands against the back of Yukio's head. It felt something oddly like being pet, and he fought down the delirious urge to protest that he wasn't a child to be comforted. "Had to get down fast. How ya doin'?"

"He said he was concussed, right? Probably because of all that debris fallin'."

He felt hands gently cradle his head and tilt his face up, and when he could make his eyes focus, he saw his brother looking down at him, Shiemi at his shoulder.

"Yukio?" Rin's voice sounded desperate.

"Fine," He rasped. "Glasses?"

The hands at his face released him, and instead dug into the pockets of his coat. They drew something out, and then metal slipped over his ears and settled on his nose. He opened his eyes, finally able to see properly, and felt the nausea die down a bit. He leaned back against the stone, letting his eyes slip closed as the sound of Suguro chanting bible verses met his ears.

"O-Okumura, don't let him pass out! If he's concussed, then he might not wake up!"

Ah, Miwa. His students were so smart. Sleeping was a bad idea, especially when it would ruin his carefully crafted schedule for each night.

"...Nii...me lavender...ermint..."

As his body finally relaxed enough to drift off, a host of jarring scents made their way up his nose. His eyes snapped open, exhaustion chased off as he saw Shiemi holding a handful of herbs to his face, worried but determined. Miwa had joined them in crowing around him, alongside both Paku and Kamiki.

"'m awake," He tried to wave them off- he was fine now, really, he was awake. He could handle himself.

A screech rang out from far behind them, followed by a victorious shout from Suguro. "Take that, you chicken bastard!"

He could hear one of the girls sighing in relief. "Thank God."

"We should get Okumura-sensei to a doctor, right?"

"I dunno if my back can take carryin' you again, sensei," Suguro murmured. "Sorry."

"I'll get him." As soon as Rin said it, he could feel his brother's arms looping around his abdomen to pull him up, and for once, he was glad for Rin's strength as he hardly had to put any effort into standing up himself. Even so, it did damage his pride a bit.

"I can walk," He protested, but frowned as a multitude of voices shushed him immediately.

"Let us help you, Yuki," Shiemi's voice was soft, and as Rin helped him up on one side, she was quick to support him on the other. Reluctantly, he let them help him walk, away from the burning mansion and out of the ruins. A part of him almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the situation- his students had been so good about not damaging anything in the mansion, but then a demon attack burned it down anyways.

Yukio just knew the blowback from the citizens at seeing a cultural site destroyed was going to be massive.

Consciousness came to him in scarce flashes after that, images of walking through the city, meeting with the Tottori exorcists, a pen light in his eyes and hands in his hair. He wasn't sleeping, not really, but he wasn't entirely awake, either. The only constant in each flash seemed to be Rin, who stayed glued to his side through everything. If he were more aware, he would've protested his brother coddling him so much, but as it was, he was just grateful for a familiar face in it all.

When he opened his eyes again, it was to a white ceiling and the familiar scent of rubbing alcohol. His lungs still felt like a band had been wrapped tight around them, but the rest of his body was pleasantly numb, his head feeling like it was stuffed full of cotton instead of pulsing painfully like before. A mask was pulled over his nose, and he frowned at the sensation, but knew better than to pull it off.

As feeling slowly returned back to his limbs, he leaned his head to the side to try to get a glimpse of the room. It was a typical set up, one he'd been in hundreds of times, with the familiar dark green of the Tottori headquarter's walls behind each of the machines. He looked down further, towards the bed, and saw his hand, already outfitted with an IV and pulse ox. Just beyond his hand was a head of dark hair, and he recognized the figure of his brother, snoozing peacefully even with how uncomfortable his body had to be, bent over the bed like he was.

He saw Rin's ears perk at the sound of his movement, and his brother leaned up, apparently not even asleep at all. Rin smiled tentatively up at him.

"You're finally awake!"

Yukio made to respond, but frowned as he realized Rin wouldn't even be able to hear him with the mask in place. Rin's mouth opened as he came to the same conclusion, and then he was reaching over to the call button.

"The nurses said to call if you woke up," Rin explained, and he nodded in place of a verbal answer.

In short order, a nurse was updating his chart, exchanging his mask for a cannula, and asking how he felt before bidding the both of them good night. He frowned- hadn't their botched mission taken place during the evening? With the cannula in place, he could finally speak, and did so despite the dryness in his mouth.

"How long-" He coughed a bit as his lungs gave out, but a few seconds later, he pulled himself together enough to continue. Rin's eyebrows were drawn tight as he watched, his frown deep. "How long was I out?"

"A couple days. Today was the third, I think," Rin admitted, and Yukio felt his eyes widening. That long? God, they should've been back in Tokyo the day before, if Rin was telling the truth. "They said your body needed time to heal, and all."

"From what?" Had it really been that severe?

"Um," Rin bit at his lip, likely trying to remember. "They said you had a concussion, and, uh, something about your lungs. Some burning. It wasn't severe, but..."

"What?" Yukio prompted. His brother had never been one to be timid, what was going on?

"They said your body was hit hard, because it was already exhausted and run down," Rin said, after a second of hesitation. There was concern in his eyes, a frown at his lips. "You haven't been taking care of yourself?"

"Oh," He breathed out a sigh- or the closest to it that he could get. It was just that, then. He had been worried that something worse was going on. "It's nothing. What happened?"

Rin looked as if he didn't want to let it go, but Yukio encouraged him to answer his question. He knew how to take care of his body enough to keep it from collapsing, this was just a minor setback that he'd get over soon enough. He had more important things to do than to just rest in a hospital bed, after all.

"Well," Rin started, reluctant. "A basan attacked the mansion while we were in it, and started setting everything on fire. We all got out, but we realized that Shima forgot you behind. So I went in there to go get you. You were already passed out, we think you got hit by some wood falling or something."

Yukio nodded, and leaned back onto the bed, letting the conversation go to rest his lungs. He supposed that made enough sense, it fit about what he remembered. Rin leaned back in his chair, and as quiet settled over the room, he closed his eyes to rest. Yukio watched him for just a moment more, then looked down to his lap.

Something felt wrong. He remembered there being someone else there, with himself and Rin. He remembered being struck in the mansion, but not by wood. By cold metal.

He didn't remember everything that happened that night, but what little he did was starting to pull together into an ugly picture.

* * *

Shura groaned over the stack of papers before her. "This shit is a goddamn bureaucratic nightmare."

The exorcists scattered around her tiredly agreed. They were all gathered in one of Tottori's meeting rooms, the branch head and the rest of the various section leads. Ohashi sat across the table from her as the tamer section head, and Daichi next to herself as the overall exorcist coordinator. Keaobaka Onyana, the branch chief, gave her an apologetic smile.

"We'll take full responsibility for the mission mishap," Onyana reassured her, much to her relief. She had enough paperwork to fill out already, what with the damage report, injury report, mission report... God, the list went on and on. Daichi rubbed a sympathetic hand against her back, one she leaned into. "We'll handle the request for reconstruction funds, and, well, if the Order comes down on you, just send them our way."

"A basan shouldn't have even been allowed to come so close to the city," A man in glasses- the security chief, if she remembered correctly -frowned as he looked over the initial mission report, one hacked together by the exwires. Yukio hadn't been able, or even conscious to give one himself. "This is clearly reflective of a failure on our own end."

"One that will be rectified," Daichi said, voice firm. "It's obvious that putting new recruits on seal rotations was a mistake. I'll have them reassigned immediately, and more experienced exorcists put back on rotation. I'll also have a sweeper team check the desert, but it may be more effective to ask tamer summons to inspect the city."

Ohashi nodded. "I'm on it, soon as we're done here."

"Good, good," Onyana smiled, and Shura had to envy how close the Tottori exorcists seemed as a whole. There was a sort of camaraderie in the room that made everything go much smoother, which was also probably why Tottori had the lowest turnover rates out of any of the Vatican's Japan branches. Onyana turned to face another man, tucking her braids behind her ear where a few others had slipped free from her hair tie. "Now, Seiho, will you coordinate with local authorities about the attack? It'll be much easier if we solidify a cover story before police grow suspicious."

"On it."

"Though before we do so, we should consolidate our stories so we know what to say," Onyana continued. "Ohashi, you led the mission into the salamander den, correct?"

"Yup," Ohashi sighed. "Though that one ended up being bunk, too. We managed to exorcise the group of salamanders, but it turns out that a cherufe was hiding deep in the den. We're still not sure why it ended up so far away from Chile and the other hotspots, but it had us occupied enough that we didn't even see the basan until it was being exorcised."

"There are a lotta demons here that ain't supposed to be," Shura murmured. The attention of the room turned to her, and she looked up to elaborate. "Japan ain't exactly the place fire demons like to come live in. North Africa, yeah, and Saudi Arabia, but Japan?"

"We have noticed more fire demons congregating here as of late, more than what we'd expect with normal migration patterns. Certain types are drawn to the dunes, but we haven't had a basan sighting in well over a few decades," The security chief mused.

She frowned. "Somethin's goin' on in the fire kingdom."

"The rest of us tamer heads have a group chat going on," Ohashi added. "They said a couple of their fire-based familiars were acting up, but none of them have mentioned any attacks on their branches."

Onyana sighed, giving Ohashi an affectionately exasperated look. "Remember to keep official correspondence on official channels."

"Yes ma'am!" Ohashi grinned, clearly not intending on doing anything of the sort. Shura didn't blame her; the Vatican's official channels were a pain in the ass to navigate, not to mention heavily censored. Practically useless.

"Speaking of consolidating our mission," One of the younger exorcists spoke up, the dragoon section head. "Did you guys read the part about that Okumura kid? Shooting down a basan while concussed and half dead? Talk about incredible!"

There were various murmurs of assent across the room, but Shura found that Onyana was the only other one in the room looking displeased. She was glad she wasn't the only one- she'd read the medical reports herself, after the doctors informed her that she was listed as the twins' medical contact, behind Shiro himself. There was nothing in there worth celebrating.

"Mrs. Onyana?" Daichi spoke up next to her. "What's wrong?"

The attention of the exorcists shifted over to the branch head, who only sighed, frown growing deeper. "...it's just not right to have a child so young in such a position. The boy isn't even sixteen years old."

"But he's not exactly a normal case, y'know. He's crazy talented, he'd be climbing ranks anyways. He's better than half the adults at True Cross, that's for sure."

"Talented or not, a child deserves the chance to be a child," Onyana disagreed. "Nothing good ever comes of children being forced to become adults before their time."

Ohashi leaned forward, curious. "Now that you mention it, he was admitted as a page at like, nine, right? Or something like that? I know his dad's the paladin and all, but that still sounds a little crazy."

One of them looked to her. "You work with him, right? What do you think?"

She hesitated.

In her honest opinion, the more of Yukio that she saw, the more he grew and the more responsibilities he took on, the less she approved of Yukio being inducted into the whole mess. The kid was a workaholic at heart, even before he became an exorcist. Add on Rin's recent awakening, his school work, his exorcism work, and then all of this?

Shura had read the medical reports. Even underneath the concussion, and the damage to his lungs, the doctor had found it prudent to mention the damage that his shit diet and lack of sleep was doing on him. He'd slept for damn near three days because his body had desperately needed it. Yukio was getting dragged down by everything, quickly, and she couldn't help but feel like she was watching a train wreck in progress. Add in Rin's sure death by execution and Shiro's downward spiral? The entire family was going to crash and burn.

_Why do you care?_

The thought paralyzed her. She shouldn't. She couldn't care, not so close as she was to her own death.

"Hell if I know," She forced a laugh, though she didn't feel it. "I just teach the kid's brother."

"Aww, I'm almost hurt." Came a dry voice from somewhere behind her.

She looked back, confused, and saw- "Yukio? What the hell are you doin' up?!"

"I have a mission report to give," He said, as if it were obvious. He was leaned against the door jamb, an IV stand in one hand and a distressed looking nurse behind him. Shura sent the nurse a fierce glare, though the young man only squeaked and hid behind Yukio's shoulder. The kid didn't even have his oxygen with him!

"Nonsense!" Onyana stood from her seat, the first to offer Yukio an arm and help him to sit down. "Your report can wait until you heal."

"It can't," He insisted. "I have to-" He broke off into a painful sounding wheeze, and the look of horror and discomfort was unanimous across those seated at the table. Yukio waved off the worried hands of the nurse, coughing into his elbow before continuing. Shura bit down anger, but irritation had her fists clenching tight by her side. "I have to say it now. There was a third person, in the fire."

"That's enough," She snapped. Shura stood from her seat to glare down at Yukio, who only looked at her defiantly. "Yer goin' back to bed. Now."

"I'm fine," He ground out, matching her glare.

She laid her hands on her hips. "Last chance."

He only sat still, and that was that. Fine. Two could play at that game.

She promptly leaned down and picked Yukio up by the waist, hefting him over her shoulder. He yelped and grabbed her jacket to stabilize himself, but she was already in motion, grabbing his IV stand to carry with her on her way out of the office. There were mixed protests and shouts behind her, along with more than a few laughs, before the door closed behind her.

"Um, ma'am!" The nurse was by her side, fretting even as Yukio slapped at her back and demanded for her to 'let me down, goddammit!'. "You really shouldn't-"

"Oh, hush up," She snapped. "It's your fault he's out anyways."

"For the last time, I'm fine! Put me down!"

In response, she only tightened her arm around his waist and made a line straight back to the medic hall. His legs finally stopped flailing, but it seemed to only be a precursor to another wheezing fit of his, which only solidified her opinion that he had no place being in that meeting room.

"Shura?"

She looked up to see Rin by Yukio's hospital door, eyes wide and expression dumbfounded. She gave him a tired grin and a wave, but felt Yukio tense over her shoulder just before another wheeze tore itself from his throat. She frowned then, and looked up at Rin again.

"Hey kid," Shura called. "Go get a couple dinners from the cafeteria, yeah?"

"Um," His wide eyes were still glued to Yukio's body over her shoulder, but he slowly started backing away. "...sure?"

"Thanks," With that, she stepped into Yukio's room, and dropped the kid down on his bed. He barely managed a weak glare up at her before the nurse finally decided to do his job, and pulled up the cannula to hook back around Yukio's ears and into his nose. She watched him sternly as the nurse reattached his monitors and put his IV pole back into place, checking over various numbers and asking about his health before scampering out of the room.

And with the two of them alone, she knew the storm was incoming.

"What the hell was that?!" He demanded. "I was perfectly fine to give a report!"

"Yeah, good luck doin' that without passing out," She retorted, dropping down into the seat by his bed. "Yer not supposed to be outta bed, and without the oxygen tank? The only thing yer gonna do is make yourself worse!"

His anger didn't abate any at the reminder, only grew stronger. "This is more important than that!"

"More important than yer life? What the hell would yer dad think if you died, huh?"

"Like he'd care!" Yukio hissed. "He'll find another babysitter for Rin anyways!"

A second passed, where Shura said nothing, and Yukio didn't take his words back. She only breathed out a sigh, and closed her eyes. This was a family issue, evidently, and one where Shiro needed to step in and start addressing things. It was a family problem, and she was not part of the family. So, she calmed her anger, and opened her eyes again to look at Yukio.

"You can give yer mission report to me," She said.

He scowled, leaning back and crossing his arms. Even so, after a minute, he spoke. "I didn't see much. But there was another person there, with Rin and I."

"Who?"

"A woman," He continued, slowly, like he was still trying to remember. "She had dark hair, in a braid, and dark skin."

"Daichi?" Shura asked, confused.

"It wasn't Inoue," Yukio shook his head. "Or... I don't think. She had red eyes, and a red dancer's outfit. The fire didn't affect her."

She nodded, and after a minute, stood from her chair. This was something to discuss with the other exorcists, in a place where Yukio wouldn't overhear and go charging off again, half healed as he was.

"Stay in bed," She warned.

"Don't pick me up, and I will," He countered.

"Don't leave, and I won't have to."

* * *

Ryuji was starting to grow antsy. They were getting on their fourth day straight of being trapped in Tottori, reduced to idly studying and training as Okumura-sensei healed and the older exorcists cleared the city of any other traces of demons. He'd gone over any homework he had left, memorized bible verses until his eyes crossed, even picked up his usual training routine again, just to fill in the time they'd been given. Okumura-sensei was out of commission and Miss Kirigakure was in and out of meetings, which left them with nobody to really... give them instructions on what to do.

They weren't even allowed to take on more missions, as the Tottori branch was too worried about another attack from a higher level demon. They weren't allowed out at night by themselves, either. All of it had him feeling cooped up and anxious to get out and do something, and he knew the feeling was shared by the other exwires.

Rather loudly, in some cases.

"Argh! I'm down to one manga!"

Ryuji sighed over his desk as Shima flopped down on the bed dramatically, rousing Konekomaru, who was busy dozing on the top bunk. The smaller monk only leaned his head over the railing, pinning Shima with a glare cold enough to send him scampering back to Ryuji's side of the room.

"You didn't tell me Koneko was sleeping!" Shima hissed into his ear.

"Why'd you come in screamin' anyways?" Ryuji retorted, shoving his face aside to focus back down on the bible before him.

"Because it was a real emergency!" Shima leaned across his back, hooking his chin over Ryuji's shoulder to peer down at the bible. "We're gonna die of boredom here, when are they gonna give us something to do?"

He sighed, reaching a hand up to rub at his eyes. "Like I'm supposed to know."

"You wanna go visit teach and Okumura?" Shima asked.

It was an innocent question, but one that had him perplexed all the same. Should he go visit them? Okumura had holed himself up in his brother's room practically the entirety of the last four days, and it was impossible to get either of them alone, at this point. And part of him wondered if that was exactly what Okumura had planned. The failed apology only days ago was still fresh on his mind, and Moriyama's, as well. Neither of them had managed to get to Okumura, and even Kamiki was grudgingly reporting no success.

His plan of harassing Okumura into friendship had worked the last time, but something seemed different now. There was a wall around the half demon that hadn't been there before, one with no cracks to slip in or get through. If he was honest with himself, he didn't know what to do.

Ryuji looked down at the bible before him, trying to find answers, or at least clarity in the words of a religion he didn't even believe in. It worked about as well as he thought it would.

"I don't know," He admitted. After a second, Shima pulled up off of him, and when Ryuji looked back, it was to both boys staring at him, shocked. "Should we?"

"You're asking me?" Shima squeaked.

Konekomaru leaned over the railing of the bunk again, surprise fading as he frowned in concern. "Bon, what's going on?"

"I..." He breathed out another sigh. "I don't really know what to do. Am I just tryin' to force this friendship on Okumura to make myself feel better, or somethin'? Does he even want it anymore? The guy's been avoidin' me for the second time now. It's makin' me feel like a creep here."

Shima shifted backwards to sit himself down on the floor, keeping quiet as Konekomaru seemed to ponder something. There was a vaguely uncomfortable look on Konekomaru's face, but he made to answer anyways.

"I don't know if there's an easy answer to that," He said. "I don't even know if we can really help you with that. You might have to go talk to an adult about it."

"Damn," Shima whistled appreciatively. "Look at you, Koneko. I thought you hated the guy?"

"I don't!" Konekomaru protested. "I just... he scares me, honestly. You and Bon are all I have left, you know. If he did something to you two..."

He trailed off on that ominous note, and after a second, Ryuji snorted. "I almost wish he would. Least then I'd know where I stand with him."

A pensive silence stretched out between the three of them, as Konekomaru leaned back into the bed and Shima picked idly at his nails. Ryuji couldn't help but think that maybe talking to an adult would be a good idea. They were certainly surrounded by them, for sure, but maybe Miss Kirigakure would be the best one to go to? She already knew about the situation, and was the second best choice, right behind Okumura-sensei.

With that decided, he nodded to himself and stood up from his chair. Shima peered up at him, then stood up as well, and at Ryuji's questioning glance, he only shrugged.

"Watching your meltdown is a more entertaining than doing nothing," He grinned.

Ryuji rolled his eyes- trust Shima to be a douche. It was familiar enough to get a bit of a smile out of him, though, and he made his way towards the door. Just before he left, he looked up to Konekomaru. "You sure you don't wanna go?"

"I just... I can't trust him yet, I'm sorry," He murmured, but his smile was kind when he continued. "Let me know how it goes, though?"

"Sure thing."

With that done, Ryuji left the room with Shima in tow, making his way past exorcists and through hallways to start trying to track down Miss Kirigakure. He knew she'd spent a couple days close by Okumura-sensei's room in between meetings to prevent another premature escape, but he hadn't seen her around there recently. They checked her room, then the cafeteria, and the training quarters with no luck, and nobody they asked seemed to know where she was, either.

Which made it particularly shocking when Miss Kirigakure came careening around the corner in front of them.

She grinned when she saw them, waving a hand. "Ah, Suguro! And the pink haired kid, too! Perfect! I've been searchin' for y'all!"

"You've been looking for us?" Shima repeated, dumbfounded, then let out an offended cry. "And what do you mean, pink haired kid?!"

"Hey, only reason I know the tall kid's name is because I'm lookin' for him," She shrugged, before grabbing them both by the wrist to drag them down the hallway. "A'ight, c'mon!"

Ryuji was too stunned by her surprisingly iron clad grip to protest at first, but he quickly got his wits back about him. "Uh- where exactly?"

"I'll letcha know when we get there!"

Miss Kirigakure didn't say anything more beyond that rather ominous statement, instead focusing on leading them to a section of hallways that they hadn't been down before. These rooms were quieter than the rest of the building, even their bedrooms up on the next floor, which probably had to do with how most of them were empty. The room she led them to was at the end of the hallway, where she hung a right, and shoved them both into one of the empty rooms.

"Take a seat, kiddos," She chirped, as she bumped the door closed with her hip.

Reluctantly, he sat down in one of the chairs around the round table, while Shima took a seat next to him. Miss Kirigakure dragged a chair over to plop herself in front of them, and despite the tense air of the room, she seemed entirely relaxed.

"So, uh, what are we doing here?" Shima asked, and Ryuji was relieved to find he wasn't the only nervous one here.

"Well, long story short," Miss Kirigakure sighed, leaning her chin on her hand. "That chicken Yukio thinks he saw someone else in the building when Rin was draggin' him out, and he thinks somethin's fishy about how he got knocked out and all. I dunno if he's bein' legit or just tryin' to make up for his hurt pride or whatever, so I need y'all to tell me if ya saw anything suspicious about the attack."

"You mean, besides a big ass fire chicken attacking us outta nowhere?"

She rolled her eyes at Shima's quip. "Yes, smartass, besides that."

"I was downstairs with Okumura, Koneko, and Moriyama," Ryuji said. "If there was somethin' weird upstairs, I wouldn'ta seen it."

"A convincing enough alibi, I suppose," Miss Kirigakure murmured, peering at him suspiciously.

"What? I'm bein' honest," He frowned. "We split up into pairs. If you wanna get suspicious of someone, look at Shima. He was the one paired up with Okumura-sensei."

"What?! Me?!"

"Relax, kid, I'm just messin' with y'all. Y'ain't on trial or anything," She waved a hand, dropping the suspicious look for her typical grin. "So? Ya see anything weird?"

Shima huffed, flopping back into his chair. "Mean. I already wrote down everything I saw in our report. Teach and I were lookin' upstairs, the basan comes up outta nowhere and starts tearing shit up, he tells me to run and I do. I didn't know the guy wasn't with me until we were already out."

"So ya didn't see Yukio again until you were already outside?"

"I guess not," Shima shrugged.

"He's the kinda guy to run first, ask questions later," Ryuji snorted. His friend turned crocodile tears in his direction.

"Boooon! You're so cruel!"

"Just sayin'."

"Well, then that's about all I got for you kids today," Miss Kirigakure finished, grabbing a clipboard and pen off the table to start scribbling something down. She glanced up at them from behind the board, then waved a hand towards the door. "Go on, then! And grab that lil blondie when ya see her, throw her my way."

Shima stood from his chair, but Ryuji hesitated. Something felt weird about this. Okumura-sensei had seen someone else? And apparently nobody saw him get injured? Miss Kirigakure was making it out to seem like someone had attacked their teacher, but the whole... nonchalant air about the situation was starting to become concerning. Was she hiding something from them?

"What's really goin' on?" He asked her, frowning.

She looked up at him, then back down at the clipboard. "Nothin' for you to be worryin' about. We'll letcha know if there's somethin' happening."

He didn't believe that for a second. If anything, that only further convinced him that something was going on, but he knew he couldn't get any information out of her. She was one of their teachers, sure, and more friendly than a lot of them, but Miss Kirigakure was one of the Order's top exorcists, through and through. If she didn’t want to tell them something, there’d be no getting around it. So, even though he hated being left in the dark, he left things as they were and stood, following Shima out of the room. 

As they made their way back to their bedrooms, Shima made a humming noise. “Y’know, you never asked Miss Kirigakure what to do about Okumura.”

“Aw shit!”


	15. a plan, a declaration, and a role to fulfill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Ahhhh I'm so happy to be back and updating again, and with good news- I've finished writing all the chapters for this story! Updates will resume as normal (and perhaps faster, though I am still considering that) until the fic reaches its completion! I'm so happy to be finishing my first long chapter fic, and I really hope you all enjoy the rest of the story!
> 
> chapter warnings: none apply

"Rin, you're avoiding my question."

He squirmed in his seat by Yukio's bedside, biting down the urge to hiss out a ' _ no shit, Sherlock'.  _ Yukio had been grilling him on what had happened in the mansion for nearly five days straight, ever since Shura had initially dragged his stubborn ass back into bed. He couldn't tell Yukio that Iblis had been there, because he knew that wouldn't be the end of it. If Yukio found out, then he would have to tell the other exorcists, and of course they would launch an investigation. If that happened, there was no way he'd be able to hide his own involvement in the situation.

Inevitably, Yukio would be dragged in as well, and everyone else too.

No, it was much better to just dodge his brother's questioning to the best of his ability, keep his cards close to his chest until it was too late for anything to go wrong.

Even though he really, really wasn't doing a great job at that.

"Rin!"

"What?" He startled, looking up to see Yukio pinning him down with a frustrated stare. "What did you say?"

"I asked you if you're sure you didn't see anyone else." His twin frowned.

"Uh, yeah, I'm sure." Rin nodded. Yukio huffed and flopped back down onto the bed, and then coughed enough to make Rin wince. "Should you be moving around so much? You're gonna hurt yourself."

"I'm fine," Yukio muttered. "This is more important. I'm sure there was a woman there."

He felt like a broken record, what with how many times they'd had this conversation already. "You said she looked like Miss Inoue, right? You were in and out all the way back to HQ, you probably just saw her and didn't realize it."

There was a soft knock at the door, and they both looked up to see Yukio's nurse waiting nervously by the door. His brother only turned in the bed to look away from the man, while Rin gave him an apologetic smile as he stepped in with his typical cart. The nurse, Nakano, was a nice guy, really, just stuck with a rather... difficult patient. Yukio had made it clear that he would much rather be out and on the job than stuck inside a bed, and apparently made it his mission to be as difficult as possible to prove that.

"Good afternoon," Nakano greeted them, though with how Yukio ignored him, it was a rather moot point.

Rin nodded in his direction, scooting his chair back and out of the way. "Hey."

"Mr. Okumura, would you mind sitting up so I can take your vitals?" Nakano attempted. His brother let out a sigh and sat up, shoving his arm out for his blood pressure to be taken.

Rin couldn't help but smile to himself. Yukio had always been heralded as the most mature out of the two of them, and he supposed it was still technically true, but he still had his childish moments like anyone else. Almost ironically, being treated like a child seemed to be the quickest way to make him irritated and difficult, and this situation was a perfect example. He really was going to miss this.

"Rin." He glanced up to see Yukio looking at him, even as Nakano held a stethoscope to his chest. "I know I saw her. And you saw her too, right?"

"I didn't." Even though it was a lie, and he hated to say it, he knew he needed to dissuade Yukio from this. "It was just you."

"But there had to have been another person. The angle of my head injury—I know it couldn't have been falling debris."

"Sir, I need you to breathe in and out," Nakano interrupted, though he looked uncomfortable as he did so. "Your lungs-"

"-are fine," Yukio snapped, leaning away from Nakano's stethoscope. "I don't need this right now."

"Sir-"

But his eyes were on Rin. "I know you're lying. You've never been a good liar."

"I'm going to have to get my supervisor," Nakano warned.

"Fine! And get the discharge papers, while you're at it!"

"Yukio!" He stood, frowning down at his brother. "Quit it, you're being an ass!"

"Because this is bigger than anyone wants to admit it is!" Even as Nakano moved to leave, Yukio powered on. "I know something is going on, and I know you're hiding it from me!"

Irritation seized Rin, and he was speaking before he could stop himself. "And how terrible would that be, huh? To know something is going on, and your brother's lying to you about it all?"

Yukio froze, eyes widening. Rin regretted it damn near as soon as it came out. He didn't mean it. He knew he didn't have the right to be angry—everyone was in the business of keeping secrets now, even him. But before he could get the apology out, Nakano was back in the doorway, looking guilty but determined with a stern-faced nurse behind him. The woman took only one look at him before biting out an order—"Out you go."

Maybe it was cowardly of him, but he didn't argue. He just pushed the chair back and moved towards the door, ignoring Yukio's gaze at his back as he left the room. And, because life had decided it hated him, he came face to face with the most recent bane of his existence. Shima Renzou.

"Heyyyy, Okumura." Shima grinned lazily. "I was just looking for you."

"Not right now," Rin sighed, turning away from his classmate and towards the hallway.

"What, is teach pitching a fit again?" Before he knew what was going on, Shima had an arm slung over his shoulder, voice conspiratorial. "He saw Iblis, didn't he?"

He jerked away from Shima, eyes wide. His classmate only laughed.

"I knew it!"

"Could you quit that?" He snapped. He hated the way Shima played around information like that. All it did was fray his already stretched-thin nerves. If someone found out about his plans, everything would come crashing down, and Shima didn't seem to mind even the least bit.

"Hey, hey, just trying to joke around." The pink haired boy held his hands up, but it was utterly ruined by his shit-eating grin. "Look, I'm on your side, alright? We both got a stake in keeping this covered up."

Ugh, idiot! Rin scowled and grabbed Shima by the wrist, dragging him off towards the men's bathrooms. He kicked the door open and pushed it shut behind him, before ducking his head down beneath the stalls to make sure they were the only ones in there. Good, they were alone. He turned a glare back at Shima, who was leaned up against the door—good, he had some sense. He stepped forward until they were nearly toe to toe, crossing his arms.

"What the hell are you gettin' on about?"

Shima shrugged, hands in his pockets. "I'm just sayin'. If word gets out about Iblis being there, it's gonna screw the both of us over."

"You?" Rin asked, suspicious.

"Oh, well, yeah. I'm a double spy, I ferret info across the lines for both the Order and the Illuminati," he said, like it was the most casual thing in the world. "But if other exorcists find out about me helping Iblis, it's totally gonna blow my cover. If they find out about you talking to her, they're gonna want to know why. And you, my friend, are a shit liar."

"I'm-" Okay, yes, he was a bad liar. He huffed, but something else Shima had said caught his attention. "Who's the Illuminati?"

Shima blinked, barked out a laugh, and then abruptly stopped. "Wait, you're serious? You just screwed over Gehenna's biggest agency in Assiah and you don't even know who they are?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I did!"

"Oh my God." His classmate leaned his head back against the wall, sighing. "Okay. Crash course. The Illuminati is an organization led by Lucifer, your eldest brother and the strongest demon king in Gehenna. Their whole goal is to combine Gehenna and Assiah and all, and they've got three whole demon kings with them, including Iblis. They got this whole thing with Mephisto and whatever about making Satan a new body, and..."

"I just got in their way," Rin realized.

Shima grinned. "Bingo. And lemme guess, Iblis found out you have Satan in you, right? What with your deal and all?"

Rin frowned up at him. His first instinct was to deny it, but Shima already knew, at this point. "...yeah."

"Damn." He whistled. "I'm guessing you traded yourself for your dad, then, back when he got possessed? That's pretty impressive."

"Yeah, well, I doubt anyone's gonna think the same way." Rin sighed, quietly.

"Oh, for sure. If the Order finds out, they'll kill you on sight."

It wasn't funny, but he found himself laughing anyways. "So, I'm dead either way?"

"Pretty much."

"Soooo," Shima drawled, tilting his head to the side. "What's your plan?"

"Huh?"

"Your plan?" he repeated. "Y'know, how all of this plays out? How you're gonna keep yourself hidden? Did you even plan anything past the deal?"

"Um..." Rin hesitated, then snorted and rubbed at his face. It was kind of embarrassing how little he'd thought about the fine details of it all. He had his end plan in mind, of course, but everything in between now and then? "No, honestly."

Shima blinked, and then let out a laugh. "You're screwed, dude."

"Thanks. Very helpful."

"We still gotta figure out what to do about Iblis." Shima sighed. "I wish they'd let me in on shit like that. I've got no idea what she's planning, but I'm sure they'll start sending out agents to collect you soon enough."

"Collect me?" Rin asked, smile fading. That sounded... incredibly ominous. He remembered being trapped in the mansion with Iblis, what little he'd seen before Satan had taken control of the wheel. He'd never in his life described someone as 'radiating power', but it was the only thing that seemed to fit. Both she, and Mephisto seemed to give him the pervasive feeling of  _ danger  _ any time he was near them.

"Well, duh. You kinda kidnapped their big leader and all, of course they're gonna want you in their hands."

"Shit." He looked at Shima, who was busy scratching at his face. "What do I do?"

"You're asking me?" Shima laughed. "Did you hear what I said? They've got three demon kings with them, and probably Astarte, wherever she is. You could maybe outrun one of them for a while, but all four? Easier to negotiate the terms of your surrender, don'tcha think?"

He didn't say anything to that, just stepped to the side to lean against the sink. He knew he was going to be in over his head in all of this, but he thought the only people he'd have to fight against would be the Order, and then Satan himself. Now, a whole second organization was being thrown into the fray? Forget in over his head, he was drowning in all of this, and there was only one thing keeping him in the game.

They needed Satan, and if they needed Satan, then they needed him. That was his bargaining chip in all of this. Satan needed him, they needed him—their whole game was dependent on his cooperation. Funny, how the one part of himself that damned him was also the one thing to save him. He'd just have to figure things out as he went along. It had never worked for him before, but if the end of each road to take was death, then it wasn't like he had anything to lose by messing up.

"I'll figure things out," he said, finally.

"Figure things out? Dude, you have literally no idea who you're messing with, do you?" Shima asked, incredulous.

"Nope." He reached a hand up to rub at his eyes. "But they need me, so I can work with that."

The other boy was quiet for a minute as Rin tried to rub some sort of energy back into his eyes.

"You know," Shima eventually said. "Playing this whole power game really doesn't suit you."

At that, he couldn't help but laugh. "Do I have a choice?"

* * *

Yukio was going to prove that the woman was there.

He felt guilty that he'd struck a nerve with Rin, but it didn't change his mind. Shura, Rin, the nurses, hell, even the Tottori exorcists thought he'd just hallucinated seeing someone there, or even was just confused with Inoue during the whole transition from the mansion back to headquarters. He was going to prove them wrong, not because of his pride or anything ridiculous like that, but because if he was right, then they were in a lot more danger than just a burned mansion.

So, he waited. Until after Nakano and his supervisor left, until after Shura had made her precautionary visit, until after the nurses had made their rounds and the lights had shut off. He waited patiently in the dark, laying flat on his bed, until the headquarters fell silent, until he was alone.

And then, it was time to go.

He carefully detached his IV and other leads, pulled off the finger cuff and the stupid, thin gown. Rin had followed his request and left his clothes bag by his bed, thankfully, so he was able to get himself in normal clothes for what felt like the first time in forever. From there, he just had to pull on his shoes, take his phone, and figure out the quickest way outside. Going through the halls was out of the question. Shura had, irritatingly, taken the extra measure of warning the other exorcists of his possible attempts at escape, so if anyone recognized him, everything would be over.

But, well... that was what twins were for, wasn't it?

Rin had left one of his hoodies on the chair, and Yukio grabbed it and tugged it on. He stepped into the bathroom to look at the mirror—if he took off his glasses, tousled his hair a bit, and made sure to stay in the darker areas of the hall, they looked damn near identical. Sure, he was a decent four inches taller than his twin, but if he just... leaned down a tad, nobody would be able to tell the difference. He grinned to himself, and tucked his phone and glasses into the hoodie's pockets. He was finally good to go.

With that, he ducked out of the room and into the hallway, subtly checking for anyone walking around. The hallway was blissfully clear, and for a minute, he almost wondered if he could've just slipped out without a disguise. He made his way to one of the side doors that he knew led to the garden, trying to keep his walking calm and slow.

"Okumura?"

Yukio froze, glanced back behind him. Shit, was his gig already up?

But the person looking at him was only a blurry image Paku, sleepily rubbing at her eyes. Fifteen years of living with his brother finally came in use as he imitated Rin's voice. "Hey, just steppin' out for some air."

She nodded, letting out a yawn. "Alrighty, good night, then."

"Night." He called back, and continued towards the garden door before his student could notice anything wrong.

It was only when he was outside that he let himself breathe out a sigh of relief. Yukio glanced over the garden, trying to find the quickest way over the cement wall. With what little he could see without his glasses, he spotted a bench by the wall, and if he just jumped up a bit, he could get over it. So, with that, he stepped up on the bench, and pulled himself up by his arms to the top of the ledge. It wasn't too big a drop, just a foot or so taller than himself. He dropped down to the sidewalk, holding his breath and staying silent as the slap of his shoes rang out on the street.

But there was no other noise, no shouts or alarms, so he reasoned that he was clear. He knew the mansion was only a street over, so it was a short walk to get back to the burned historical site. Nobody even looked in his direction, this late at night, so he felt safe enough to put his glasses back on and roll the too-short sleeves of the hoodie up to his elbows.

The police tape around the mansion's perimeter might have scared off other people, but Yukio had a self-assigned mission to complete. He smoothly ducked beneath the tape and started the hike up the hill. There was nobody around, thankfully, so he pulled out his phone and turned on the flashlight as he came up to the door. It was still blown open, the inside of it charred and blackened, but sturdy enough. He stepped into the mansion, only giving a quick glance around to see the damage.

Most of the furniture had been destroyed, the walls torn and wall paper ruined with soot. The roof had stayed up, and most of the infrastructure, though there were sizable holes in the ceiling that let slivers of moonlight through. He dodged holes and sharp, broken wood up the stairs, making a beeline for the last room he remembered before going unconscious.

The room was utterly destroyed, of course. Burned, blackened, a destroyed husk—all of the above. It was almost unrecognizable, but he mentally retraced his steps as he walked into the room. He remembered Shima being at his side, looking across the room and searching for demons, and then... a crack at the back of his head, and fire, and something crashing and blisteringly hot hands holding his body. He remembered fire, suffocating, his brother dragging him out of the mansion.

But the injury had come even before the fire, hadn't it? The more he thought about it, the more sure he was. It definitely hadn't been debris to hit him, but he needed more proof than that. Yukio looked over the room, trying to find some sort of evidence that someone else was there. He recognized footsteps of ash leading to the center of the room—likely Rin—and then a smear of soot. That was probably where Rin had pulled him out.

In the middle of the room, he spotted another set of footsteps. These weren't shoes, however—they were bare feet. And, if he leaned down and held the flashlight over the prints, he could see that they had been seared into the wood. He straightened up and followed the footsteps, up to the window, where there was a set of prints on the windowsill, and then nothing.

It told him frustratingly little about who the person was, besides a body heat high enough to burn wood, but it did tell him one important thing.

He was right. A third person had been here, and that was evidence enough that something was up. Yukio grinned to himself. He was right!

And then, a shadow crept over him from the window, followed by a voice. "Did you find what you needed?"

On instinct, his hand snapped to his waist, but his fingers came up empty. He'd left his guns back at the headquarters. Stupid! He scrambled back, looking warily up at the figure crouched in the window. It was the woman, he knew it. He recognized her silhouette, dark save for the soft amber glow of her eyes.

"Calm yourself, little brother. I mean you no harm today." She said. "I am Iblis. I am here only to give a message."

His mouth felt dry, his heart pounding in his ears. Fourth in line in Gehenna's hierarchy, and he had no assurance he'd make it out of this building except for her word. Yukio remembered his phone was still in his hand, and as he sent a quick prayer, begging she wouldn't kill him if she noticed, he started recording.

At least if she killed him, they could find his phone, and whatever message she was intending to leave. "...what is it?"

"In five days, I will be amassing my forces and launching an attack on your organization." Iblis' expression was calm, even as she laid out her threat. "I have only one goal in all of this: the collection of Okumura Rin. If you offer him over, I will withdraw from the country and halt the attack."

"And if we don't?" Shit, shit,  _ shit.  _ Shit!

She only blinked, then continued. "Then I will burn your organization to the ground, and slaughter anyone who stands in my way."

As the Demon King of Fire, he knew damn well that she had the ability to do exactly as she said.

"Why are you telling me this?" he asked, trying to hide the shaking of his hands. Judging by her smile, he hadn't succeeded. "I could just go warn the Vatican. We could have the whole organization here in minutes."

"Then do so." She tilted her head to the side, smile growing and eyes glinting. "It's been centuries since I've tried my hand against your silly little group. I'd love to do so again, if you would be so kind. This body of mine certainly gives me more liberties than my previous hosts."

He didn't know what to say. What could he even say? There was a death sentence stamped over their heads unless they handed Rin over, and if it came down to giving Rin away or damning their entire organization...

"What—what do you want with Rin?" If it was what he thought she wanted, then-

"We of the Illuminati intend on perfecting his body for possession by our Lord Satan."

-the Order was going to kill him. They'd never allow Satan another chance at possessing a body in Assiah, but Yukio knew that the Vatican would never hold him equivalent to all of their exorcists combined. What better solution to both problems, than to simply kill Rin, and deny Satan that chance? He knew in their minds, it would be a perfect solution to all of their problems. Rin had dodged execution at the onset by only the grace of God and more luck than he'd ever receive again, but this would be the end of everything.

"That is the message I intended to bring." Iblis stood from her crouch, casting her shadow over him. "I have nothing more to impart. Goodbye, little brother. I do not wish to kill you, but I will not hesitate to do so if I must. I only hope it will not come to that."

Before he could even say anything more, she stepped backwards, and fell from view. He watched her, still and wide-eyed, knowing that even if he looked out the window, she would be gone. His hands were sweaty, trembling as he pulled his phone up and stopped the recording. Less than five minutes long, and yet he felt like he'd spent a century, just waiting to be struck down.

But he had the recording. The recording of a declaration of war.

He couldn't get out of the mansion fast enough. Forget subtlety. Forget the sneaking. He didn't care how much trouble he would get into for sneaking out. Yukio ran through the streets as fast as he could, skidded around the corner back to the headquarters and to the doors. There were two exorcists stationed by the front of the door, playing some sort of card game, but he didn't spare them a second glance before throwing himself past the doors.

He came to a halt just in the doors, frozen by indecision. Who should he tell first? Would anyone even be awake? Where were they?

But movement caught his eye, and he looked up to see Onyana standing before him in a shawl, a cup held between her dark hands. She looked at him as well, concern written across her face.

"Okumura? What are you doing up so early?" The branch chief was at his side in seconds, setting her mug aside to drape her warm shawl across his shoulders as she gently led him to sit down on one of the nearby couches. "You're shaking like a leaf, sweetheart, what happened?"

He pulled his phone up, typed his password in with shaky hands and handed it to her.

"Iblis is coming."

* * *

The harsh burn of alcohol down Shura's throat was nothing compared to the roiling irritation and frustration in her chest. She held the bottle of vodka to her lips and drank as much as she could physically stand, swallowing down the burn before slamming the bottle back down onto the counter. Daichi sat at her side, a fond yet exasperated smile on her face as the cafeteria lunch rush milled about around them. She could feel several stares at her back, but she couldn't care less.

Because Angel was arriving today, and he had the whole Arc Knights Circle with him.

She knew it would only be minutes until they arrived, alongside the Order's top exorcists, and so she was making the valiant effort to get as drunk as possible before they got there.

"Is getting drunk really the wisest idea, lovely?" Daichi asked, smiling. "Surely seeing him can't be so bad."

"Of course it is! That asshole Angel is a complete pain in my side, I could live my whole life without seein' him again." She huffed, thunking her head down onto the table. Only mere seconds later, Daichi's soft fingers were in her hair, soothing her. She sighed into the uncomfortably hard table.

"A necessary evil, then," Daichi murmured placatingly.

"I'd honestly rather just take Iblis on myself."

She laughed at that. "No, you wouldn't. It would be a one sided fight, and you'd die."

"That such a bad idea?" Shura muttered into the table, as Daichi's hand froze in her hair. "Goin' down in the line of duty and all, sounds a hell of a lot more impressive than some curse."

"No!"

She leaned up, blinking in surprise at the anger written in Daichi's furrowed eyebrows and dark eyes. "What?"

"You're not going to die," Daichi damn near hissed. "Certainly not against Iblis."

Shura couldn't even think of what to say, and as the seconds passed, Daichi's anger melted away into something guilty, but still irritated. She opened her mouth to say something, then snapped it shut, and abruptly stood from the table and walked off. Shura could only watch her in shock, still completely dumbfounded.

What the hell had even brought that on? They'd talked countless times about her incoming death with Hachiro and her curse. Why did this suddenly piss her off? But even if she wanted to go track down Daichi and figure out what all that was about, her decision was already taken away from her, by the entrance of someone else in the cafeteria. An exorcist, who took one sweeping glance around the room before settling on her, and crossed the room.

"Miss Kirigakure," he greeted, eyes flickering to the bottle by her side. "The Tokyo exorcists have arrived, and asked me to lead you to them."

She sighed and wordlessly stood from the table, taking the bottle in hand before motioning for the man to go on ahead. He nodded, then turned on his heel to lead her out of the cafeteria. Shura took another gulp of vodka as they walked, and the exorcist snickered beneath his breath but wisely decided not to comment on her questionable drinking habits. Good, because then she'd have to tear him a new one.

The room he led her too was already spilling out into the hallway with exorcists, crammed wall to wall with people waiting for debriefing. He managed to squeeze between them to make his way into the office, thankfully paving a path for her to follow up to the front of the room. There, at the head of the table, sat Angel, and beside him, the four Arc Knights.

Lucy was crouched on the table itself, idly smoking her pipe, while Lewin was making himself busy plucking hairs out of Angel's head and laughing at his reaction. As she managed to make her way to them, however, Lewin grinned and made to leap up from his to greet her, only to be grabbed by a massive brown hand. Osceola only sighed as he pushed Lewin back into his seat, and Dragulesc rolled his eyes at the scene.

"Shura," Angel greeted, frowning distastefully. "Drinking already, I see."

"Angel." She mimicked his pretentious tone, slamming the bottle down on the table as she plopped down in one of the open seats. "Still goin' bald, I see."

As always, an offended look crossed his expression. "I still have a full head of hair, and then some!"

"Balding is a personality trait." She pointed out, which drew a chuckle from Lucy.

"Even if that made sense," Angel muttered. "This isn't the time for insults, we have a meeting to commence."

Shura scoffed at that. _Good luck getting this whole room quiet,_ she wanted to say. Angel may have believed himself to be higher than everyone else in the Order, but he still had a ways to go before he could convince everyone else of the same.

"Allow me." Osceola stood and cleared his throat, and just with that motion, the room fell into awed silence. Because, where Angel demanded attention, Osceola was able to command it without even trying—though, with his incredible height, form, and overall disposition, he was hard pressed  _ not  _ to be the center of attention in any room. "Now that we have everyone's attention, can we proceed with our meeting?"

Onyana, at the middle of the table, nodded, and Osceola sat again. "Yes, of course, thank you. Do we have all of our section heads present?"

Several people nodded across the table, and Shura spotted both Daichi and Ohashi seated among the group.

"Very well then," Onyana hummed, and that was that. "If we would all direct our attention to them, Lewin Light of the Arc Knights will present us with the background of their arrival."

"Yep, yep!" Lewin cheered, hopping up from his seat to the whiteboard just behind him. "Now, to start off, I don't have the time to explain what the Illuminati is or who they are. What's important to know is that this organization is led by three separate demon kings: the King of Fire, Iblis; the King of Water, Egyn; and at the formal organization's helm, we have the King of Light, Lucifer."

He uncapped a dry erase marker and doodled out a crude drawing of each of the kings, with Iblis and Egyn at the bottom, and Lucifer above them. Just above the trio of kings, he made a doodle of a figure with horns. "And behind them is the God of Gehenna itself, Satan. I've been following their activity for a while, following reports of spies and all. But, curiously enough, their operations came to a screeching halt months ago! We had no leads to follow on where they were or what they were doing, until word came in from separate branches."

"Essentially," he continued, drawing a long arrow from Iblis to a scribble of Japan, surrounded by various mean-eyed fire balls. "The fire summons of various countries have been acting abnormally, and unregistered demons have been congregating here in Japan. As the domain of Iblis, of course we were interested in this development! Follow your nose, you know~!"

"Which led him here," Angel finished, as Lewin hummed to himself and returned back to his seat. "And from the Tottori branch?"

"We had attacks on the same night from a basan and a cherufe," Onyana said, as she placed a stack of papers at the center of the table. "We've collected the paper trail for you to review, if you find it necessary. In the injury reports, we hospitalized middle first class exorcist Okumura Yukio, following his injuries in the basan attack. However, last night, he took the liberty of investigating the Jinpukaku Mansion."

_ He did what?!  _ Shura seethed in her seat. Trust that four-eyed little brat to run off as soon as she took her eyes off of him!

"He brought back a troubling message, from who we have reason to believe is Iblis herself." Onyana held a phone up, and a voice rang out from the speaker.

_ "In three days, I will be amassing my forces and launching an attack on your organization... _ " A feminine voice spoke. "... _ we of the Illuminati plan on perfecting his body for possession by our Lord Satan." _

She practically could've heard a pin drop in the silence that followed the end of the recording.

And then everything promptly went to hell.

"They want the kid?!"

"We can't handle a war against a demon king!"

"Just hand the damn demon over!"

"We can't sacrifice a child!"

"I knew we should have executed him weeks ago," Angel hissed, a hand quick on Caliburn as he stood from his seat.

Shura was startled out of her own shock, leaping up to grab him by the back of the jacket. "The hell are you goin'?"

"To put an end to this and get rid of Satan's spawn!"

"What?" One of the exorcists spluttered. "Why kill him? Just hand him over!"

"Are you a fool?" Angel stopped his warpath only to glare down at the exorcist. "You suggest that we should give them what they want? A way for Satan to gain access to Assiah?!"

"Look, nobody's killin' anyone!" Shura snapped, yanking him backwards and shoving him back into his seat. "Everyone just—chill the hell out and talk about this like adults! Jesus!"

Onyana stood, scowling. "Honestly! We are not children. We are adults, and we will restore this meeting to order immediately. I am mortified to see such behavior from my own exorcists. We have not taught you to act out of fear and panic!"

There were several embarrassed murmurs from the room as several of its occupants shuffled back into seats and against walls, restoring somewhat to order. Shura took her seat once more, as did a reluctant Angel, and then the room was returned back to what it had been before the message from Iblis had been shared. A silence stretched as people settled, and in that time, her mind was running a mile a minute. Yukio escaping again was nothing compared to this. They had only three options, really, and it seemed like many of them were intent on taking the one that ended in Rin's death.

What would Shiro say?

Wait. Where was Shiro?

"Angel," she said, even as the room turned to stare at her. "Where is S- Fujimoto?"

Instead of an answer from him, it was Dragulesc that spoke, looking up from the packet Onyana had placed out earlier. "Fujimoto Shiro is currently out of commission, recovering from multiple organ failure from an injury sustained in a recent mission. His status is poor, don't expect to receive his assistance."

In the shocked silence that ensued, Shura tried to force herself to speak, through a dry mouth and a pounding heart. "Whaddya mean, his status is poor?"

He looked up at her, eyes cold and bored. "What I mean, is that it is likely that Fujimoto will not be returning to the line of duty from this point on. His condition is worsening, and if he recovers from this injury, then he will not be in a position to return to active duty."

Shiro... was dying?

"Oh, and while we're on the topic," Dragulesc continued, shifting the papers aside to draw up his own sheaf of documents. "As he is unable to execute his typical duties, the Grigori approved his decision to appoint an acting Paladin until either he is able to return to his duties, or until an official Paladin might be appointed. This acting Paladin, as decided by Fujimoto Shiro..."

He glanced over at her, and Shura felt her blood run cold.

"...is Kirigakure Shura."

The only person in the room who could be possibly more stunned than her was Angel. But she didn't find any humor in the situation. There was nothing funny about this, nothing amusing. Shura was not Paladin material, and she was sure many others would agree.

"No," she said. "This ain't right. You read it wrong."

"Then how else would you propose I read your name?" he asked, sarcastic, as he slid the paper in the middle of the table for them all to see. "Kirigakure Shura, upper first class exorcist, has been appointed the temporary position of acting Paladin by the current Paladin, Fujimoto Shiro, and with the approval of the Grigori of the Vatican of Italy."

_ I'm going to kill Shiro. _


	16. a mission, a phone call, and a period of consideration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry this chapter was late, I was with friends yesterday and didn't even think to post it.
> 
> chapter warnings: mentions of death

In minutes, the room was cleared for a temporary recess, leaving Shura alone in the office with only Onyana, Angel, and the Arc Knights. She paced at the opposite side of the room of its other occupants, chewing her nails down to shredded nubs. It was an ugly habit, one she'd kicked after Shiro painted her nails with foul tasting polish when she was fourteen, but God was this a situation for nervous nail biting. 

"I ain't Paladin material." She muttered, working her thumbnail down.

"I fully agree!" Angel exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "Surely this had to have been a mistake!"

"I don't even have a dragoon meister."

"She doesn't even have a dragoon meister!"

"Shura," came Onyana's voice, disapproving yet not unkind. "Don't have such little faith in yourself. Fujimoto was one of the best exorcists that the Order has put out in centuries. Surely he had to have good reason to appoint you."

Shura huffed, crossing her arms as the last of her nails fell to her habit. "Except that Shiro's a cracked up old man who probably don't even know his rights from his lefts anymore! Jesus! Angel's next in line, ain't he? Not me!"

"Honestly, Kirigakure," Dragulesc looked up from his papers, expression unimpressed. "The title of Paladin is not as all-powerful as many like to view it. Particularly as acting Paladin, your duties will primarily be limited to coordinating forces, going on missions, and following orders from the Grigori."

"Your leash is just gilded, now," Lewin said, grinning. "You get to be a dog, just like the rest of us."

"As I was saying," Dragulesc ground out. "The duties of a Paladin are largely ceremonial. The true power lies with the Grigori, you simply act as an instrument of their will. In addition, as I've said before, you are only temporarily assigned to the position for the duration of Shiro's intake. If we have reason to believe he will not recover, which we certainly do, then a permanent Paladin will be appointed by the Grigori."

There it was, again. She swallowed, though her throat felt dry. She spoke past it, not ready to confront the myriad of emotions tearing at her chest. "...you really don't think he will survive?"

Dragulesc blinked, frowned, then returned back to neutrality. Shura was deadly still, waiting for him to say something, and she knew she wasn't the only one. The other Knights were looking at him as well, alongside Angel, who looked more concerned than she knew he'd ever admit aloud.

"In my experience, it is not beneficial to cling to idealized scenarios." He said, slowly. "If you plan for the worst, then the best is a blessing. I will not raise the hopes of the Order on what I believe to be the slim chance of recovery, and I believe it to be in our best interest to prepare for the worst."

"What happened to him?" She made herself ask. She needed to know, needed to be prepared.

"As I said, he suffered an injury on a mission. I am not at liberty to give more information, in compliance with patient confidentiality. However..."

From his stack of papers, he pulled forth an envelope, a beige one with no outward markings. He set the folder on the table, and she numbly crossed the room to pick it up. Inside, she found a stack of papers, with  _ General Durable Power of Attorney _ written across the top. The weight of the words hit her and dragged her down into the nearest chair. She squeezed her eyes shut, praying that all of this was a mistake, or a dream, or even that she was already dead and this was just a personal hell she'd been sentenced to.

"...as his listed power of attorney, you and I will be in correspondence in the near future," Dragulesc finished.

It had to be a joke. Shiro  _ knew _ about her curse. She knew that he knew. She had only years left — now was the time to wrap things up, not open up new problems! Why would he push this on her? Why would he give all of this to her? She was supposed to live her life with no connections, no one to lose, no one to lose her. Why was he doing this? Why didn't he tell her? She dropped the packet to the table, leaned her head into her hands and breathed out a sigh. 

Why didn't he tell her? Did he think she was just some employee to shove all his responsibilities onto? God, shit. 

"His adopted sons are here, right?" Lewin wondered aloud, though his words stabbed her ears like nails. "Who will tell them?"

Shit.

"Lewin." Osceola's voice was sharp.

"Sorry!"

Their faces flashed through her mind. Yukio, angry, hurt, ‘ _ he'll find another babysitter anyways!’ _ Rin — God, Rin. The kid was a walking train wreck and she knew it, no matter how many times she managed to forget his shell shock. 

They needed her. Shiro, Yukio, Rin, they were depending on her now. And she couldn't do it. She couldn't let this go on. She couldn't let this get worse. She needed to end this, now, before it was time to leave, before she realized she wouldn't be able to let them go.

Onyana's hand was warm on her shoulder, rubbing her skin soothingly. "You don't have to take this on by yourself. If you need assistance, all you have to do is reach out."

She shook her head, pushing all those feelings into a box to lock away and throw out. "...nope. Got it. We're fine, call them back in."

"Shura-"

"It's fine." She forced herself up from the chair, even though her limbs felt like weights dragging her down. She turned a grin to the others, too sharp, too harsh. "I'm the actin' Paladin now, right? We got an invasion to deal with, so let's get a move on."

She could feel the eyes on her, the questioning looks, but she meant what she said. Iblis' attack was coming in less than four days, and she could tell Yukio and Rin about Shiro later. This was infinitely more pressing. And so, a handful of seconds passed, before Onyana stood, and stepped over to the door to allow the rest of the exorcists inside. As the minutes passed, they filed back in, chattering and conversation filling the office as the section heads and various faculty took their seats at the table, and the other higher ranked exorcists stood by the wall.

"Alright, listen up!" Shura called, and the room came to quiet.  _ Lucky most of 'em know who I am. _ She took up Lewin's dry erase marker from the table, then wiped off his doodles from the board with her sleeve, ignoring his offended noise. At the corner of the board, she wrote the number '4', and circled it multiple times. "We got four days until Iblis launches her attack, and as many days to figure out what the hell we're doin'. So until then, we're raisin' hands for suggestions, you got me? We ain't got the time to argue.

"First things first: Numbers. What does Tottori have, and what do we got coming in?"

As the smallest prefecture in Japan by population, their number of exorcists had her skin practically crawling with nervousness. They had around 1,700 exorcists on hand, but with the Tokyo numbers brought in that day, and the surrounding prefectures, their numbers were closer into the multiple thousands. The division had to be offset with the number of tamers whose summons would be rendered ineffective, and almost as if to knock down their advantage of numbers, the water based demons were becoming difficult to manage. She supposed that had much to do with Egyn working with the Illuminati as well, but it was starting to pull together into a bad picture for them.

Their number of water summons would have to be stretched thin between groups, to protect their exorcists against damage from Iblis' fire attacks. Dragoons and arias were going to be the most sorely needed, alongside doctors, but knights would have to be sidelined because of the danger of burns. Their close ranged attacks would just be ineffective and downright dangerous.

Which worked out well, to an extent, because she would need them elsewhere.

"We got another priority in all this." She moved away from the board, scrawled with numbers and information, to look back at the room. "Get the kids out of here. Casualties are gonna be inevitable, but I'm not havin' children's blood on my hands."

Onyana nodded in agreement. "We'll compile a team to escort them out of the prefecture. I'll coordinate with Okayama and Hyogo about finding a safe residence for them."

"How many numbers do you think we'll need?" Daichi asked.

"As a start... perhaps fifteen or twenty. We'll need to focus our forces here, but any less would leave them near defenseless."

"I'll go along," Lewin suddenly spoke. Shura looked at him, confused, as did the rest of the room. He only smiled and shrugged casually. "You can spare the numbers if I'm there, and you'll still have the other Knights, alongside our shiny new Paladin here."

"Acting Paladin," Arthur grumbled. 

"I can go along as well," Daichi added, expression soft. "I'm sure they would appreciate a familiar face, and it would also reduce the need for numbers."

"Should we really be spreading our leadership so far out?" The security head frowned.

"The meister section heads are capable of coordinating themselves appropriately." She answered.

Ohashi tilted her head to the side, looking in the direction of both the security head and Daichi. "And, the kid's will be with them, right? If that's who they want, better overprepare than under prepare, don'tcha think?"

"Should we really be putting so much effort into defending the son of Satan?" one person asked, shifting uncomfortably. "If we give him over, they'll let it be."

Shura rolled her eyes — were they still on this topic? But before she could correct him, Lucy laughed aloud, blowing out a puff of smoke from her pipe.

"In all my years," she chuckled, "a demon such as those at Satan's side has never done exactly as they said they would. Why would they start now?"

Osceola nodded. "She is correct. Surrendering the boy will give Satan access to Assiah, and even if that were not the case, we should not sully the name of the Order by cooperating with beings such as the Illuminati."

"Why not just kill him, then? Wasn't he supposed to be executed anyways? Then they would lose what they want so bad."

"A valid idea, I would say," Angel muttered into his palm, and Shura groaned.

"And risk them beatin' the shit out of us in retaliation?" she retorted. "There ain't an easy solution to any of this. No matter what we chose, we're losin' lives. We might as well lose 'em doin' what this organization was formed to do: fightin' back against Gehenna. That's our purpose and our goal, not givin' over kids and scamperin' away from Gehenna's forces with our tails between our legs."

There were a few murmured voices of agreement, and she saw Onyana nod approvingly from her seat. She looked down at the table as the room quieted down, trying to force her emotions down into something manageable. There was a part of her that raged against the very suggestion that they give Rin over — the kid who she watched work for his first lit candle, who fought tooth and nail just to win a spar, who avoided home and demons and others because he was terrified of the very people that others suggested they give him over to.

But she fought it down, tempered it into something she was able to ignore. She'd done it for years, and she couldn't afford to make exceptions now.

"So we have our plan in order then, yes?" Onyana started, as the talking died down again. "Mr. Light and Inoue will lead the party escorting the children out of the prefecture. The rest of our forces will disperse themselves across the city in anticipation of the attack. A spear team will lead the offense against Iblis if we are able to launch a counterattack, and exorcise her from her body if possible. We will have the specifics of assignments decided in further meetings, but for now, is all understood?"

There were more murmurs of agreement, and after ending discussions, that was that.

The meeting was over, and she had two students to talk to.

* * *

By the time that Shura finally made her way to Yukio's room again, he already had his argument well honed and perfected. He had already weathered Rin's worried interrogation after he finally came back to his room late that morning, and he was well prepared for whatever aggressive lecture she had come up with. He was able to leave the cannula and oxygen behind when he was sitting down, and only needed it after around thirty minutes of exercise, so he was hardly in any danger by exploring the mansion. He was fully prepared to defend himself.

But when he finally saw that familiar head of red hair enter the room, her expression was cool, and he felt the words die in his throat. He couldn't place it, but something felt wrong, off.

"Yukio," she said, and there it was. Shura hadn't called him by first name in years, not since they had first met. "Rin in here, too?"

It took him a second to get around to nodding, thoroughly thrown off guard as he pointed to where Rin was scrolling idly on his phone, sprawled across his seat. Rin looked up, something of a smile on his face, but it fell apart when she didn't return it. 

"I'm here." He said instead.

Yukio watched as Shura only nodded. There was another plastic chair beside her, but she didn't take it.

"We had a meeting concernin' yer lil recording." She directed towards him. There was none of the heat behind it that he had been expecting, no irritation or exasperation or disapproval. Just indifference. "The Arc Knights are here, and they brought Tokyo exorcists with them to help with the attack. I-"

At that, there was finally the first hint of emotion in her expression. Something like hesitation, and reluctance, and Yukio felt as if she were about to say something that he didn't want to hear.

"I was appointed actin' Paladin," Shura said, carefully. "In replacement of Shiro. He was hurt in a mission, and he's in the hospital in Tokyo now."

_ What? _

He could hear the sound of Rin's phone hitting the ground, but it sounded far away. His mind was already running a mile a minute, drawing conclusions, connecting dots. He knew that a simple injury wouldn't keep their father down, much less necessitate an acting Paladin. His blood felt cold with dread, hair standing on end. Something bad had happened. Something very bad.

"What..." Yukio tried to get the words out, but it was like they were evading him. He didn't even want to ask. Some hysterical part of him didn't want to know, didn't want to hear the truth, because if she didn't say it aloud, then it wasn't true, right?

Shura looked away, towards the wall. "Dragulesc, his doctor, said his body's been fallin' apart since the last possession. He's gettin' old, and his injuries are startin' to take him down. His body couldn't heal from this last one. His... his organs were beat to hell and back in the attack, blunt force to the stomach and all. The doc says he got worse a couple days ago, took a hard turn down." She swallowed visibly, jaw tense. "Says we shouldn't get our hopes up."

_ ‘Shouldn't get our hopes up’? _

Yukio reached a numb hand up to his mouth, looked down at his lap but didn't see a thing. Her words felt like a bucket of ice water down his back, something so sudden and abrupt. It couldn't be real. How could this be real — their dad? 

_ "I gotta get going then." Shiro had said, smiling as he patted his shoulder. "I'll come see you two later, alright?" _

He closed his eyes, felt pain like blades in his chest, and for a moment, he was seized by the helpless, despairing urge to cry. He breathed out, raw and hoarse. "...what are we going to do?"

"We have to see him, right?" Rin asked, sounding small and desperate. "We- we need to-"

"Yer not goin' anywhere," Shura said, sharp as a whip crack. Yukio physically recoiled, eyes wide, but she was unyielding and firm. "Yer a target right now. The both of ya are goin' with the rest of the exwires somewhere safe."

"But he's our dad." His twin's voice was broken, cracking. "You have to do something!"

She only shook her head. "I won't. This is Iblis we're talkin' about. We can't afford to cart you over to Tokyo. I got other people to worry about."

Yukio could only look at her, stunned and wounded. Shura shifted, uncomfortable, before she sighed and turned away. There were no condolences, no reassurances, no tears, not even any sympathy. He knew Shiro meant the world to her. He knew she cared about him, about himself and Rin. They teased each other, annoyed each other, but she cared about them, right? 

"Why are you doing this?" It was all he could ask, the only thoughts in his head that made any sense. "Why are you leaving us?"

_ Why now? We need you. Don't go. _

She hesitated. For a moment, Yukio hoped. He hoped she would turn around. The accusation was heavy in the air, and he wanted her to deny it.

"Shura." He tried to steady his voice, tried to fight down the tears. "Please."

_ Please don't go.  _

But her hand reached out to the door, and it shut behind her with the finality of a guillotine.

It was all he could do to stare at the door. To stare at where she left, even as the tears rolled over, even as his chest tore open, even as Rin choked down a sob behind his hand. Slowly, he looked back down at the sheets, through a blur of tears to his shaking hands. 

"What- what are we going to do?"

"...I don't know," Yukio breathed, and with it, came the crushing rush of everything he'd been fighting back. The fear, the hurt, the hopelessness, and each one had the tears burning hotter. "I don't know."

"We could call him!" Rin yanked out his phone, unsteady fingers tapping his screen. "He'll answer, right? Doesn't he have his phone?"

He stood and moved to sit down beside Yukio, and there was the sound of the dial tone as their father's number was called. He tried to keep himself under control, to hold on just one minute longer, but each dial of the phone had the strings that held him together snapping.

And then it picked up.

_ "Rin?" _ came the voice, raspy and weak but there, and he broke, breathing out a choked and strangled cry. He leaned his head down, doubling over as Rin leaned close to him, the phone cradled between them like something precious.  _ "Yukio? What's wrong?" _

"Dad-" It was all his brother could say, through their shared tears. 

There was a small quiet, where Yukio pressed his palms to his eyes, but nothing stopped the harsh, ragged breaths that fell from his mouth. 

_ "They told you." _ His voice crackled through the speaker, softer this time. _ "It'll be okay, boys." _

"How?" Rin cried. "How is any of this okay? We can't even come see you, and you're gonna-!"

_ "Oh, shh." _ He could see it, every time Shiro would shush them quietly, pat their heads and hug them close. He tried desperately to feel it then, to imagine that their dad was there with them.  _ "Your old man is stronger than this old thing, gimme some credit, yeah? You'll see me in no time." _

Yukio sucked in a breath, steadied himself. "...Iblis is coming. They're having us run away but we- if she- if she wins, then... dad..."

_ "I know it's scary, but... you have the Order at your back. Iblis is strong, but she can't take all of True Cross on. They'll get you out of there, and then you can come to me. You can stay with me, and everything will blow over, and then we can go home, alright? Everything will be okay." _

It was false hope, fake bravado put on just for them. The chances of getting to go home, of everything going to plan, of everyone surviving... it was too much to hope for. But he needed it. He needed the hope because he didn't know what else to do. Their dad was dying, and Shura... she wasn't going to help them. Even if it was fake, even if it was stupid, he needed that hope to plaster over that horrible, choking ache in his chest. 

_ "I love you two, alright? Both of you. Don't forget that." _

"I love you, too." Rin was the first to say it back, and after a few seconds, Yukio did as well.

_ "So." _ The happier tone he put on was like a lifeline.  _ "Besides war threats, how's the mission going?" _

It was enough to startle a snort out of Rin, but with that brought the disgusting noise of snot and tears, and Yukio couldn't help but let out a wet laugh. 

"Like shit," Rin said, wiping at his nose. "Yukio got hurt."

_ "What? What happened?" _

He leaned his head down on Rin's shoulder, frowning. "I'm fine, it wasn't anything serious."

_ " _ It was," his brother disagreed.  "He got a concussion and all, and messed his lungs up."

He wanted to deny it further, but a sigh came from the other end of the phone, one that was bone tired and exhausted. All at once, the brief spark of humor died. "...They didn't tell me that. Are you okay?"

Yukio opened his mouth to reassure his dad that yes, he was fine. It was an instinct, something he didn't think about anymore. He was the smart son, the mature son, the one Shiro didn't need to worry about, but... for once, he didn't want to be. For once, he wanted to be reassured.

"I'm better," he murmured. "But my chest hurts. I can't walk very long, and it hurts to breathe sometimes."

Rin reached an arm over his back and squeezed him close, and he let himself sink into it bonelessly. He hadn't let Rin coddle him for years, but he reasoned to himself that it was okay to have this, just for a minute.

_ "Then take it easy and relax for a few days, okay? Let the adults handle this." _ Shiro assured them.  _ "Just focus on healing and staying safe. You have the Arc Knights coming in soon, just do what they say and keep your heads down." _

The Arc Knights? Yukio felt dread and fear rocket down his spine. The Arc Knights were the Order's strongest, just under the Paladin and the Grigori, and he had no illusions as to how little they'd prioritize Rin's life over the ease of an execution. They were as far removed from Rin as one could be, and more powerful than he could stop or even try to slow. If Rin slipped up, even once- or even if the battle seemed like a lost cause, they'd kill him.

And if they chose to do so, he knew there would be nothing he could do to stop it. He wasn't strong enough, or high ranking enough. The only connections he had were burned after their heritage came out, and the few that survived... _ 'I got other people to worry about.' _

He was just an exorcist in a sea of thousands of others like him. He had no allies. He had no status. He had no hidden trump card.

Goodbyes were said and the call ended, but Yukio felt numb. There was only one thing on his mind, one thought.

In protecting Rin... he was alone.

* * *

The Okumura brothers looked like shit.

Eyes bloodshot, faces pale — Ryuji could see the resemblance between them, now, paired as they were in the dark cloud that seemed to hover over their shoulders. He couldn't say he blamed them, exactly. With Tottori and Tokyo exorcists alike, scrambling together battle plans and covert escapes and supplies, it really did feel like they were watching the end of the world. What little information they got on the whole situation was scattered and uncoordinated, and each update was more unsettling than the last.

From what they gathered, Iblis had used Okumura-sensei to relay her message of war, but what exactly the demon king wanted, nobody seemed to want to tell them. All they knew was that an attack was incoming, and they were going to be escorted to another prefecture, and hurry up and pack your things because they had only days left. It was how he found himself corralled away in his room with Shima, with Miss Kirigakure's stern order to pack their bags up and stay put. Apparently, Mr. Fujimoto was injured and in the hospital, and she had been appointed acting Paladin in his place.

There were changes being made left and right, and he didn't know how to keep up. He didn't know what to do, besides shove clothes and textbooks into his bag and pray that they weren't just running away into the jaws of death.

"This is really kinda shit, huh?" Shima remarked, sprawled across his bed with a manga across his chest.

"No kidding." Ryuji muttered. He let the books fall down to the bed and sat down heavily, reaching his hands up to rub at his face.

"Y'know, I'm starting to wonder if maybe we're just cursed. Do other exwires have to deal with all this, or is it just us?"

He shrugged. "You'd have to ask Okumura-sensei."

"Ha, good luck with that." Shima snorted, shifting on his side to face him. There was a quiet that stretched, before he breached it again. "Those guys really don't look too hot, huh?"

Ryuji nodded at that, but said nothing. What could he even say? He didn't even know what to think anymore. He was worried about Okumura, about their teacher, but he felt like there was a wall that Okumura had thrown up so suddenly. He didn't know how to cross it, or if he even should anymore. He didn't know what to do about either of them.

"I think it's because their dad's hurt, and all." His friend continued, oblivious to his ongoing crisis. "It must be pretty bad, if it's hittin' them that hard. I mean, we knew Okumura was kinda touchy, but teach? Seein' him all like... upset and all, it's-"

"-weird." Ryuji finished, and couldn't help but agree with his friend. It was easy to forget sometimes, but Okumura-sensei was only their age. He was in their class, and yet already a teacher, and an exorcist. "I feel like we should be helpin' em."

"Well, you're talkin' to the wrong dude." Shima chuckled. "I can bump 'em a good porn mag, but all of that... dad stuff, it's not my thing, y'know?"

Before he could think of something to say, there was a soft knock at the door. The two of them looked up to see Konekomaru in the doorway, the sleeves of his hoodie pulled up over his hands. It was one of his own hoodies, an old one from when they were still in middle school. It didn't fit him anymore, and as soon as he had made to throw it out, Shima and Konekomaru had stolen it to share between them. It smells like Kyoto, Konekomaru said. It fits me just right, Shima had tacked on with a wink. 

Ryuji felt a familiar sense of concern hit him once he saw it — Konekomaru only wore that hoodie when something was really bothering him.

He reached an arm out, and his friend crossed the room to sit on the bed by him, tucking himself beneath Ryuji's arm. He held Konekomaru close as the other boy leaned against him, and knew without having to say it aloud what was bothering him. In the quiet that followed, Shima let out a dramatized sigh, and stood from his own bed to join the both of them.

"There's really nothin' to worry about." Shima said, taking Konekomaru's offered hand only to start picking the dirt from under his nails. "We got like, the whole Order here, and those Arc Knight guys. We'll be fine."

Ryuji nodded. "Long as we got each other, we'll be fine."

"Mind if we join?" came another soft voice — Moriyama, smiling tiredly at the door. Behind her was Paku, and an irritated yet flushing Kamiki.

He raised an eyebrow at Kamiki, who only huffed. "What? Like we were gonna let her in the boys' room by herself?"

"She'd be in good company~!" Shima sing-songed, only to yelp as Konekomaru's lax hand reached up to slap his wrist. 

He pouted as the girls moved to situate themselves on the bed, where Paku and Moriyama sat side by side, with Kamiki standing close by. Ryuji could see Paku fidgeting with a stick of charcoal in her hands, either uncaring or unaware of the black streaks it was leaving on her fingers. 

"So y'all are worried too, huh?" he asked. 

"Hardly." Kamiki scoffed. "We're not even gonna be in the action anyways. We're just running off to Okuyama or whatever, we'll be fine."

"But it's Okumura they want, right?" Konekomaru's voice was quiet, and even as Kamiki raised a derisive eyebrow at him, he knew it had nothing to do with Okumura's heritage. "I doubt they'll let us go easily. We could get in real trouble if something goes wrong."

"Why do they want him, anyways?" Paku asked.

To his surprise, however, it was Kamiki who answered. She looked at the door, like she expected someone to poke their head in, before speaking, quiet. "I had Uke and Mike eavesdrop for me the other day. Apparently, Satan wants his body."

Shima physically recoiled. "Ew, what? That's his dad!"

"Not like that, idiot!" She snapped, and for once, Ryuji was on her side. "For possession! Okumura's his half demon kid, remember? So, the same flames that kill everyone he possesses don't even bother him. Plus, he can exist here, or in Gehenna. He's the perfect body for Satan to take."

"Please stop sayin' stuff like that, you're really not making it any better." Shima groaned, flopping back onto the bed before Konekomaru could get another quick smack in. 

"So if they get Okumura, then we're really gonna be in trouble." Paku's hands twisted the charcoal, and he watched as Moriyama reached a gentle hand over to still her fidgeting before the stick could break. Kamiki pulled a little doll from her pocket, a white fox-looking thing, and tossed it over for Paku to fidget with instead. 

"That must be a lot for them to deal with," Moriyama murmured. A solemn air fell over them, then. "All by themselves."

"But they have Miss Kirigakure, right? Isn't she like, a family friend or whatever?" Shima asked.

Paku frowned. "I haven't seen her in a while. She's pretty busy being the new Acting Paladin, I think."

"Doesn't mean they can't give us some information to go off of." Kamiki grumbled. "We don't even know when we're supposed to leave. We just have to sit here until someone decides to grace us with an update or something."

"I feel the same," Ryuji added. At Kamiki's surprised look, he flushed and scowled. "What? I apologized, didn't I?!"

She glared right back at him. "Relax, you big monkey! I wasn't mad at you!"

Irritation crept up hot in his chest, but then Konekomaru's slim hand was around his wrist, and he forced himself to calm down. "Whatever. It's not the point."

"As much as I'm sure we'd all like to help the Okumuras," Konekomaru murmured, "we have to worry about ourselves, too. What are we going to do?"

"We'll be with one of the Arc Knights, and Miss Inoue, too, right? They'd be enough to protect us." Paku said, but the hesitance in her expression and her stuttering fingers over the doll didn't make it seem like she actually believed it.

"I'd feel better if Mr. Fujiomoto were with us." Shima sighed, flopping back onto the bed. "He exorcised Amaimon all by himself, right? And isn't that guy like, fifth in line or something?"

Kamiki frowned at him. "Amaimon is seventh, stupid. Iblis is fourth in line. There's a whole world of a difference between them."

"Her element's fire, too. Fire is pretty damn destructive, even when it's not bein' wielded by a demon king." Ryuji looked over to Moriyama, whose expression reflected the conclusion he was leading them to. "Moriyama's shields can't help us. They'll burn right up, if we get cornered by some of her kin."

"Also not much use in swinging around a stick at 'em.” Shima added.

"My byakko have their sacred wine technique." Kamiki added, quiet. She seemed reluctant, and he couldn't blame her with how much attitude her familiars tended to give her. "It's not much, but it can get us out in a pinch I guess."

He nodded. "And we got Okumura-sensei's bullets. I can shoot 'em if he can't. Koneko and I probably have a solid number of fatal verses between us, but it'd probably be good for y'all to pick some up between now and when we leave."

"I want to help, too." Moriyama said, determined. "If I can't be a shield, then I'll do something different."

"I've seen your test scores." Kamiki scoffed. "You're better off just giving emotional support, or whatever."

Moriyama turned bright, eager eyes up to her, fists clenched. "I can do that!"

Ryuji fought back a grin as she startled, face turning pink. "Wh- I was kidding! Stupid, just- use your greenman to make some aloe or something! That'll help if we get burns."

"Right!"

"Stop getting so excited! I'm only doing this because you're too useless to actually help!"

"Hey." Ryuji looked up at her, scowling "That's goin' too-"

"It's okay." Moriyama interrupted, and even when they started at her openly, she only gave them a reassuring smile. "I know you guys are too nice to say it, so it's okay. I really can't help much at all without Nii."

Paku laid a hand on her arm, then turned a disappointed look up to Kamiki. "Even if that were the truth, there are nicer ways of saying it."

"Everyone has weaknesses to make up for." Konekomaru added, leaning up a bit from Ryuji's arm to say so.

"But the aloe is a good idea." He said, holding his free arm up to scratch at his goatee. "I can look up some herbs to scare away fire kin, and you can come by here later so we can get you some verses memorized."

There was a beat of silence that occurred after he finished, but as the seconds stretched on, he was confused to find that nobody else was speaking. He glanced over at the other exwires, only to see a mix of wide eyes and poorly hidden smiles. Only Moriyama looked equally as confused as he did.

Shima was the first to break the silence, muffling a snort. "I'll be sure to steer clear of here, then!"

"Shut up!" Kamiki snapped, then turned blazing eyes up at him. "What part of 'we're not leaving her alone' did you not get, bonehead?!"

Ryuji's eyes widened as realization dawned on him.

"That's not what the hell I meant!!"


	17. a farewell, a game, and a pair of twins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the late night update.

Shura could feel Daichi’s eyes on her from across the room, and decided then to ignore her.

She focused her attention onto the sheafs of paper before her, where their initial battle plans were scrawled across the sheets. The exorcists of Tokyo and Tottori alike had already gotten their mission orders handed out, and all understood them well, but she still found herself nervously looking over the summary of their planned moves.

She wasn’t stupid — she knew that this battle wasn’t going to go well, no matter how many Arc Knights or Tokyo exorcists that they had with them. They were fighting against a demon king, and whoever else Iblis decided to drag along into the pseudo war, but the Grigori hadn’t seen it fit to send any more exorcists than strictly necessary. Shura wondered if it had something to do with Rin’s life being on the line (and it likely did).

Shura pushed aside the sting that came with the thoughts. She could still hear their voices in her mind, and it was taking all the strength she had in her to avoid fixating on it. She had to remain impartial, if not only for her future, then for the immediate moment and the threat Iblis brought.

“Something happened,” Daichi said from behind her, and it wasn’t a question. There was a sureness in her voice, alongside something like sympathy. “The boys?”

“I ain’t got time to talk about this now.” Shura muttered. The papers before her needed her attention right now (and not the boys who she left behind).

“You do.” There was the sound of the other woman sitting at the table next to her, the chair creaking in the empty meeting room as she did. “Everything’s already in order, love. There’s nothing more you can do to prepare.”

She sighed at that, and set the papers down to rub at her eyes. “God, I need a-”

“-drink?” Daichi finished. Shura looked over to her, and saw her holding a bottle of tequila up. “I figured you might want to take the edge off.”

“Aren’tcha always talkin’ about me gettin’ an alcohol addiction?” she asked, suspicious.

“You already have one,” Daichi sighed, as she popped the bottle open and handed it to Shura first. “But I’ll give you a pass, in case it’s the last time.”

She reached for the bottle and took a burning gulp of alcohol first, before handing it back to Daichi. “Ya think we’re gonna die, or somethin’?”

“Please, Shura.” The other woman chuckled. She’d brought a small shot glass for herself, and poured a drink out. “We’re adults. We know how this works.”

“Yeah.” Shura didn’t feel the typical humor that came with conversations like these. She only felt the sick, heavy sensation of the alcohol in her stomach.

“Did you tell them about the Paladin?” Daichi asked, in that knowing way she always seemed to say everything. Shura only nodded, silent, eyes glued to the glass of alcohol between the other’s hands. There was no point in hiding anything from her lover. “They didn’t react well, did they?”

She shook her head, and ignored the guilt that came with it. She definitely could have been kinder with her delivery, but… it was necessary. And she needed to accept that.

Daichi threw her shot back, and after the wince faded, her expression was understanding and sympathetic. “I can’t imagine they would’ve. This situation is hard for them, and… you, as well.”

“Not now,” Shura said, quiet. They both knew that she really meant ‘not ever’, but that went unspoken.

“Then when?” Daichi asked her. “We may not live past this, you know.”

A moment of weakness struck her, and she found herself relenting. “You’ll be safe.”

“Safer,” the other woman corrected, gentle but realistic. “But not guaranteed. Life has a way of wreaking havoc on even the best plans.”

“Very reassuring, thanks.” Shura said, dry. She took up the bottle and drank again, but knew she needed to stop after that. The plan would be put into motion in less than an hour, after all, and she needed to be at her most aware and ready. 

“I try my best.” Daichi joked back.

A loud noise sounded from the intercom system above them, and they both quieted.

_ “Last call for supplies and preparation. Begin reporting to your stations, and ensure you have the right numbers for your overseeing officers. Good luck, and good hunting. Come home safe.” _

Another noise, and then silence. A heaviness sat between them, one filled with words they had said to each other hundreds of times over the years, but couldn’t bring themselves to say when life came down to the line. Shura only looked up, and locked eyes with Daichi. She memorized the roundness of Daichi’s eyes, the beauty mark just beneath her right eye, the stubborn curl of hair just at the crown of her head.

Something about this battle felt wrong, and ominous in ways no other mission had felt before. With everything on the line here, she knew something was going to fail, someone was going to fall between the cracks. And if that was either of them, she wanted to just spend this minute, holding on tight before letting go of the last person she had left.

This one didn’t hurt. It only felt numb, and somehow, that seemed worse.

“I’ll see you on the other side.” Daichi said, her smile gentle and sad. “Wait for me?”

Shura snorted, standing from her chair and stretching. “Only if you do the same.”

“Of course,” the other woman said, and when she stood, she reached out to take Shura’s face in her hands and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Anything for you.”

The weight of her words settled deep, but Shura didn’t have time to think about it. They had to start moving, after all, so she turned away from Daichi and started gathering what she needed for the battle plans. She already knew her role — to fight at the front lines of Tottori, direct forces and hold the incoming army back long enough for the kids to get away.

As Daichi left the room, Shura prayed for the first time in her life.  _ Please, God… if nothing else, just keep the kids safe. Please. _

She’d gladly die and end her cursed bloodline, but they deserved the chance to live and see their father again.

When she stepped into the hallway, it was to the rushing crowds of the Tottori and Tokyo exorcists, shouting and arranging equipment left and right. The last teams who hadn’t yet left for their stations were scrambling to get the rest of their supplies together, as orders were being shouted left and right. She merely passed by them, towards the entrance of the building where many groups were leaving.

The freshness of the afternoon air hit her first, and a breeze ruffled her ponytail as it blew past. Through the glare of the sun, she could see the exwires grouped together on the empty street, with both Daichi and Lewin at their head. The latter of which waved his hand excitedly at her, something she only rolled her eyes at and ignored.  _ Man child. _

There was another group of exorcists heading their direction, a team of around four or five. They’d traded quantity for quality of backup, so as to keep the group discreet while they were evacuating. Shura recognized some of them, enough to know that they were more than capable fighters.

She found her eyes drifting from them over to the children, where the exwires were huddled together in a mass of badly-hidden nervousness. Yukio and Rin were the only ones who didn’t seem to be standing with the others, instead close to each other, and she could see a childish sort of fear and insecurity across Yukio’s body language as he kept a close eye on his twin. It made her heart twist, and she forced herself to look away before she could start having second thoughts (again).

When the exwires began to leave with their escorts, towards a building with a hidden underground exit, Shura kept her eyes turned up and away, and tried her best to ignore them.  _ It’s game time, now,  _ she thought to herself as she sucked in a breath.  _ Stay focused. Keep them covered. _

As the minutes slipped by, she watched as the last of the teams dispersed. Then, the radio at her waist buzzed, announcing that all groups had reported to their positions. 

“That’s our cue, then.” came Lucy’s voice from below her. Shura looked down at the older woman, as the smoke from her pipe drifted up into the sky. “Ready?”

“As I can be.” She muttered, watching the tobacco clouds disperse. “This one’s a lot bigger than Amaimon.”

Angel snorted from behind her as Dragulesc and Osceola joined them at the building’s entrance. “Iblis is only fourth in line. She won’t be a match for the Order’s strongest altogether.”

“Except for their power goes up damn near exponentially.” Shura countered. “Not to mention, we ain’t exactly fireproof.”

“We have holy water!”

“What, ya gonna douse yourself in it every two minutes? Secrete it like sweat?”

“Well, it certainly would be a step up from accepting defeat!”

She matched his glare. “We’re not acceptin’ defeat, we just can’t be stupid and reckless thinkin’ we got this in the bag. Those kids are our priority.”

“Those kids.” Angel made a little huff, turning his glare off to the side. “Maybe most of them-”

“Those  _ kids  _ are our  _ priority _ .” Shura gritted out firmly, and electricity practically crackled between them for a few tense seconds. Angel looked away with an eye roll, followed by the sound of Lucy’s chuckling and Dragulesc’s sigh.

“If the two of you are quite done,” the doctor said, dryly. “We do have positions to be taking.”

As if to prove his point, their radios crackled with static.  _ “At the front lines. Hostiles sighted in the southeast district, requesting leadership.” _

It was time, then.

The mood of their group dropped, and like a cloud, grimness settled over them. Shura took the helm, stepping out into the street and towards the groups nearest where Iblis’ forces were spotted. Silence stretched across the road, the buildings eerily empty after the civilians had been evacuated. It was unsettling to see barren storefronts and windows that swung in the breeze — it felt almost like a cheesy western movie.

But as they grew nearer to the south east district, the similarities only grew more. She could see the line of exorcists lining the street, standing in front of and beside towering canisters of holy water, bibles in hand and expressions guarded. Across the street stood a group of five women, dressed in draping, loose cloths that fluttered in the breeze. Their eyes were unnaturally bright, ears pointed, demonic. 

Of course, behind them waited what looked like damn near every fire type demon in existence. Shura could feel the urge for whiskey once again as she spotted more basans than she could count, and even a few dragons thrown into the mass of charcoal and flame.  _ Because why not, right? _

One of the women stepped forward as Shura came to a stop just before the line of exorcists, and her voice was a smooth, husky thing that carried easily across the street.

“We don’t want violence,” she called. “If you surrender the prince, we will leave you unharmed.”

Shura snorted. “Yeah, unlikely. Are we gonna get a move on with this, or not?”

The way the woman’s mouth twisted into a bit of a grin told Shura that she had been right all along. Sure, Iblis might not want to fight the whole Order, but as curling, flaming wings sprouted forth from the demon’s shoulder blades, she knew that the demon king was likely the only one. The group of demons followed their leader, and within seconds, five phoenixes crouched before them.

The one at their head let out a screeching cry, and the demons behind them roared in response. Shura almost could have laughed at the absurdity of it all.

This was going to be the absolute goddamn worst.

* * *

Despite Shima’s best efforts, the silence that stretched over their entourage was a pervasive and heavy one. Not to mention awkward as well. They’d ended up divided into three factions, really. The exorcists from Tottori, who stood as a pack and are apparently comfortable enough with each other not to need to start conversations, as well as himself and most of the exwires. 

The only exceptions were the Okumura twins, who stood alone, drawn together and just as quiet and solemn as they had before their group had left for the escape. Normally, he wouldn’t really care if the two of them separated themselves. Between escaping Tottori and dodging around the scattered fire demons, there wasn’t really a need for conversation, per se. 

But now? They were all walking through the woods and away towards the next prefecture, and all he could was that it was awkward as shit without Rin’s smile and laughter to break up the mood. Hell, even his bickering fights with Bon were better than this.

Shima sighed loudly, and the exorcist beside him snickered.

“Bored?” the man asked, raising a pale, blonde eyebrow. He decided to call the man Albino.

“Sorta,” he said, after a second. “Kinda itchin’ for something to do after all the hype of gettin’ out of Tottori.”

“Don’t get too ahead of yourself,” Miss Inoue admonished, but her smile was understanding. “We’re not quite out of danger just yet.”

Man. She sounded just like Yukio, now that he thought about it. Shima felt his eyes trace over to Yukio’s back, trying to resist the urge to smile. 

He’d managed to get away with his own part in the basan attack, thankfully, but he was beginning to think that it wouldn’t have mattered anyways, what with how big Iblis’ plan was blowing up. 

_ Maybe this is a last ditch attempt at getting Rin? _ he wondered to himself. Her plan to get him in the basan attack had failed, it seemed. Maybe she was just losing her temper and throwing an all out attack? Either way, Shima just knew that he was going to end up screwed over, in some form or fashion.

“Kid?”

He blinked as a hand waved before his eyes, and saw Albino giving him another amused look from behind his tinted shades. “Huh?”

“I saiiiiiid,” he drawled. “We’ve got something to keep you entertained, if you’re really that bored.”

“Yeah? Like what?” Ooh, maybe they’d sicc the exwires after some fire demon? He wondered if he’d be able to sneak away some and let Yamantaka have some time out. The demon was practically itching under his skin these days.

“Aria quiz!”

His eyes widened. “What?! No!”

A quiz? What the hell was  _ wrong  _ with these people? But the rest of the adults only laughed along, including Miss Inoue, the traitor.

Another one of them spoke up. Shima decided to call her Scar Lip. “Yep! It’s happening! Three, two, one, go!”

“Psalms 103, verse 2 through 4.”

“I don’t know that one!” Shima whined. “C’mon, you play  _ bible verse  _ games in your free time?”

“It’s good practice,” Albino said, shrugging. “And, sometimes you get lucky and manage to exorcise a demon hanging around. So, Psalms 103 verse 2 through 4.”

“I already told you, I don’t know!”

“Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits-  who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.” Kamiki spoke up, tone even as she recited the verse perfectly from memory.

Scar Lip whistled, impressed. “Hoo, someone’s ready for kin of Rot necrosis banishment!”

“It’s an easy verse to memorize.” She huffed, turning a sour look back to Shima.

He deflated, sighing dramatically. “I’m being bullied on all sides.”

“Well, you did say you were bored. Kinda brought it on yourself.”

“Alright, your turn now, kid,” Scar Lip said, turning to Kamiki.

His classmate hummed a bit thoughtfully, and though Shima knew she was only trying to find the most difficult verse that she could come up with, he was grateful to have the attention off of himself.  _ At least no one’s questioning me being an aria this time,  _ he thought wryly.

“Luke 17, verse 25 through 25,” Kamiki eventually said, smug.

“For as the lightning, that lightens out of the one part under heaven, shines to the other part under heaven,” said another man, one who walked with a slump and a quiet, but strong voice. Big Foot, Shima called him. “So shall also the son of Man be in his day. But first must he suffer many things, and be rejected of this generation.”

“That’s our aria!” Scar Lip chirped, slapping him on the shoulder. “Your turn now!”

“Um…” Big Foot shifted a bit as he walked, uncomfortable. “Uh, Psalms 23.”

“Aww, you’re going easy on them?” Albino called, snickering as the other man shrugged.

“I think I know this one,” Moriyama cut in, and the group quieted a bit as she did. “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want… He maketh me, um, lie down in green pastures. He leadeth me beside the water.”

“That was pretty good!” Miss Inoue said warmly. She led them towards a branch off of the forest’s main bath, though he could see something of a clearing, up ahead of them. “More confidence, and make sure you study the specific grammar, alright?”

“Y-Yeah! Thank you!” Moriyama flushed as she said it, and Shima couldn’t help but think the soft pink across her cheeks was incredibly endearing. The world would be better if there were more Moriyamas in it, he decided.

“Now you get to choose the verse,” Scar Lip explained.

“Alright! Just a second, I’ll think of one…”

As she did so, there was a faint rustling that came from the woods beside them. Shima tensed a bit, as did the rest of the exwires, but none of the Tottori exorcists paused in their trek through the woods.

“Relax,” Albino murmured. “Best course of action is to never let an attacker know you noticed them.”

He nodded absently, but to his surprise, the figure to step out of the woods was only another exorcist. He could practically hear Konekomaru sigh in relief.

It was another woman, who stopped before Miss Inoue with a rather severe look on her face. “We have a perimeter set. If anything sneaks up on us, I’ll know.”

Miss Inoue nodded, and the woman joined them on their walk. Afterwards, the group devolved back into quiet, though he could see that Scar Lip had crossed the group to further antagonize Big Foot. However, as he saw her sling an arm around the other man’s waist, he wondered if it wasn’t something a bit deeper than that.

“Nothing to worry about now.” Albino sighed, tucking his hands into his pockets. Shima looked away from the pair ahead of him, and back towards the man beside him. “Nagai has a contract with the Kingdom of Insects, they’ll keep an eye out.”

Shima felt a violent shiver run down his spine, looking at Albino warily. “What… kind of insect?”

“Oh, chuchi.”

“Eurgh!” A second shiver wracked his spine. He suddenly, and very violently, regretted skipping out on the bug spray before they set out. “Gross.”

Albino chuckled. “Phobia?”

“Yeah, I-”

“Shit! Incoming!”

At that, the group did freeze. In seconds, there were weapons drawn and moth familiars called, and he suddenly found himself staring at the backs of the Tottori exorcists. The adults had them encircled tightly, crowded and tucked out of the way as they looked warily towards the woods.

He saw Nagai grit her teeth, then point somewhere to their right. “There.”

Shima heard them before he saw them. A chorus of eerie dogs howling, scattered barking and snarling that grew closer at an alarming speed. Hellhounds, he’d bet. So, Iblis’ plan wasn’t just an all out war, huh?   


He didn’t know if he should be grateful, or nervous.

The sound of snapping twigs and branches echoed out, as the howling grew in intensity. He could smell burned wood, and tried to busy himself putting his k’rik back together. When the last of the pieces screwed into place, the bushes parted, and a group of hellhounds burst forth. They snapped their jaws and spat fire out and about, and with that, the battle began.

Albino was the first to throw himself forwards, a shimmering nymph at his side and ice packed tight around his arms. The exorcists and dogs dissolved into a blur of motion, of shouts and cursing and water that splashed everywhere.

“They should let us help,” Kamiki hissed, at his side.

Konekomaru shook his head, frowning intensely as he held tighter onto Bon’s shirt. “They told us to stay back, we’ll only interfere!” 

Something caught his eye to the side, and he looked back to see Rin handing Kurikara — _ when did he have that? _ _ — _ to Miss Inoue, who took it with a grim look on her face. They were saying something, but Yukio was loading his gun, a determined look on his face as he brought it up to aim at Shima’s head. His heart stopped.

The gunshot rang out, and instead of feeling the sweet kiss of death, he heard a high pitched canine whine behind him. 

“Of course,” he breathed to himself, relief flooding his veins. “We  _ are _ in a fight, after all.”

_ Guilty conscience, much? _

He waited for the teacher-like reprimand Yukio would surely have for him, but the other boy only looked away, his blank expression crumbling as he turned the gun to where the hellhounds were startling to circle around them.

Between all of them, they managed to hold their ground against the flaming canines, if only barely. He never thought he’d be using the k’rik to punt fire dogs across a clearing, but, well, he supposed that was just how life went. It really would be easier if he could use Yamantaka, he mused. Luckily, hellhounds weren’t that high up in the Fire Kingdom’s hierarchy.

It was somewhere in between having his pant leg ripped and throwing a hound into a tree that he heard a gasp, and then a shout.

“Daichi? What are you doing?!”

He found his attention being drawn somewhere behind him, and froze as his eyes landed on Miss Inoue. She had Kurikara unsheathed in her hand, heedless of how the blue flames across the blade licked her hand. In fact, the blue flames didn’t burn her at all. Neither did those of the hellhounds.

And Shima realized, with an intense feeling of embarrassment and irritation towards himself, that of course that was Iblis’ chosen body. 

“I’m sorry about this, kids,” Miss Inoue said, smiling sadly. “I hope you all make it out. Truly.”

Then, before anyone could say anything more, she held the blade up, and promptly broke it over her knee.

Rin screamed. Miss Inoue’s eyes flashed amber. Someone yelled, gunshots rang out, and something blue exploded.

_ So, that was her plan, huh? _

* * *

“C’mon, fuckers! I got all day and plenty more where that came from!!”

Ohashi Yuka cackled as she stabbed her knife up into the body of another hellhound, flinging the demon away from herself as hard as she could. Another one came snapping up to her ankles, but her favorite little ghoul familiar, Murder Cat, dutifully leapt in and batted the hellhound aside. She left the hellhound to him, instead turning to where she’d heard the phoenix woman fall back to only moments before.

As if to confirm her position, the phoenix woman gave a beastly screech, and Yuka grinned in anticipation, leaning her weight onto her back leg to prepare herself. Just like she expected, she felt the gust of wind just before the other woman descended onto her, and reached a hand out to grab whatever she could get her fingers around. It felt something like an ankle, but whatever it was, it was significant enough that the woman cried out as Yuka yanked her down with all her strength.

Something cracked against the ground, and before the woman could get up, Yuka called on Murder Cat. The ghoul hissed, and then she could hear the screaming wails of the phoenix woman as the sound of teeth clamping down on skin rang out.

“That’s it! Get her!” She cheered her familiar on, grinning.

The holy water grenade at her waist was a distinct weight on her hands as she grabbed it off of her belt, ripping the pin off with her teeth. She spat the metal out, and as the grenade started to hiss, she pulled on the bond between herself and Murder Cat. Her familiar retreated back to her side, and she chucked the grenade where the phoenix woman had been, then ducked down and covered her head as the holy water promptly exploded.

She blocked most of the spray from Murder Cat, then twined her head back, listening for any sign of life from the woman. “Is she dead?”

_ The demon has been exorcised.  _ Murder Cat told her.  _ I am not entirely sure if her human body is salvageable, however. _

“Ah, shit,” Yuka sighed. “Well, I guess that happens when you sicc your familiar on ‘em.”

She tucked her knife back into its holster, and instead pulled her radio off of her waist, clicking the familiar round button that had static sounds ringing out.

“Yo, I could use a medic team on the south end, 3rd district,” she called into the radio, standing up properly. “Got a recovered human host, not sure if they’re living yet.”

_ “Couldn’t you at least check for a pulse?”  _ came the crackling sigh of the doctor branch head. Yuka snickered — what a worrywart.

“Sorry, busy!” she called, then promptly tucked the radio into her belt and ignored the doctor’s loud complaints.

Instead, she drew forth her collection of summoning papers, and swiped a bit of blood off of a bite on her forearm to smear across the sheets. Yuka murmured a quick prayer, then dropped the paper to the ground as a puff of smoke blew her hair out of her face. There was the familiar sound of popping bones and stretching skin that carried on to an almost obscene degree, but one that she was more than familiar with.

“Hey, Slaughter Dog!” she greeted, reaching a hand down to scratch at the stump left behind of the ghoul’s missing ear. “Can you check the perimeter and give me a heads up when something’s comin’ in? I need Murder Cat with me more than I thought I did.”

A wordless feeling of confirmation crossed the bond of their deal, and then she heard the skittering of claws as Slaughter Dog took off, leaving her behind in the street.

“Yo, Ohashi!”

At the call of her name, she turned to the noise, tensing herself up for another attack. After that, all she could hear was the roaring of an engine, and then a gust of air hit her at once as the engine suddenly came to a screeching halt. Two pairs of feet hit the ground, then, and as the footsteps drew, her familiar crept forward and sniffed whoever it was that was approaching.

_ A man and a woman,  _ Murder Cat told her, rubbing his side up against her leg idly. She could feel the slick wetness of blood left behind, and huffed — she would definitely have to replace these clothes, at this rate.  _ They smell faintly of your friend, Inoue.  _

At that, she startled. Daichi’s younger twin siblings were here? “Kashira? Alim?”

“Who else?” Kashira crowed, reaching a hand out to slap her back.

Yuka stumbled forward, then cackled, whirling around to shove Kashira right back. “Ha! You ass, you didn’t even come say hi before shit went down?”

“Well, we did just only get here.” Alim countered, and gave her a significantly less aggressive of a greeting clap on the shoulder. “Not our fault everything went to hell when we arrived. You couldn’t have held out for just a day or two longer?”

“Oh, sure, let me just ask Iblis, the Demon King of Fire, to call a rain check on her assault.” Yuka snorted, crossing her arms. She felt a warning spark from Slaughter Dog, and reached down to the corpse of the hellhound by her feet, feeling along its side to grasp her knife. She yanked it out with a grunt, flicking off some of the blood before falling back into a defensive stance. “Speakin’ of, here come her goons now.”

“Ha! Why don’t you ask her now, Alim?” Kashira cackled. There was the clicking of a gun cocking, and she could hear Alim pull his prayer beads from his pockets. “Oh, miss demon king! Please call your familiars back so I can go on one last alcohol bender with my friends!”

Alim immediately gave a protesting whine. “Oh, c’mon! That was one time!”

Before they could tease him any further, she could hear the croaks of the salamanders and the barking of hounds come echoing down the street, and felt a spark of energy from Murder Cat, just a few feet before her. The next battle was about to begin, then!

The next few minutes were a blur of snapping jaws and spraying blood, pure and utter carnage. It was terrifying. It was exhilarating. It was what Yuka lived for — the thrill of adrenaline, the wordless bond between herself and her familiars, the scattered teasing and laughter of Alim and Kashira beside her. 

While she preferred knives and the teeth of her ghouls, Alim and Kashira favored firearms, and the crack-banging of the gunshots had her ears ringing. In a way, it was difficult to have to fight the pulsing in her ears. She was relying almost entirely on her familiars and the people around her. It was as exciting as it was anxiety-inducing.

Ahhh, she could get addicted to this.

“Hey, Alim, catch!” she called, tossing a hellhound from the blade of her knife up into the air. Seconds later, the crack of a gunshot rang out, and there was a hum across her bond with Murder Cat. Perfect teamwork, then!   


“How many we got left?” Yuka asked, preparing herself for the next attack.

“Uhh.” Kashira trailed off into silence for a second, then continued. “Two, maybe three on this street. But they’re retreating back?”

Huh? Retreating?

_ “-come in! Any one, come in! This is the point group, we’ve been attacked!” _

Her radio practically vibrated with the intensity of the message, and Yuka’s smile dropped. The point group- that had been Daichi, with the kids. 

“Shit,” she hissed, and yanked her radio off of her belt. “Come in, point group, this is Yuka. Who’s attacking?”

_ “Iblis!”  _ came the frantic response.  _ “She cornered us, we- we were betrayed! We’re losing ground, quickly! If anyone can back us up-” _

“We’re on the way. Any available units, fall in!” Yuka cut in. She set the radio back to her waist, quelling the urge to demand a full rundown. She couldn’t waste time on details- they needed to go, now. 

“C’mon, we’ll take the bikes!” Kashira called.

Yuka nodded, and reached out until her hand hit Kashira’s. From there, it was a mad dash to where the motorcycles were parked, and Yuka slung her legs over the bike. She reached around to grasp Kashira’s waist tightly, as the bike revved to life alongside Alim’s. As she leaned her cheek onto Kashira’s shoulder, she couldn’t help the brief grin.

“Just like old times, huh?” she asked.

Kashira barked out a laugh. “Aw, shut up!”

Yuka laughed to herself as the wheels screeched and the bike took off, clutching safely onto the other woman as the wind swept her hair up and out of her face. Consequences be damned, she had missed being on Kashira’s motorcycle.

“We need directions to wherever that point group is!” Kashira called, shouting to be heard over the wind and the roar of the engine. 

“Aw shit, you know I’m bad with those!” Yuka groaned. “There’s a- a path or something off the north end, it goes up into the- fuck, hijab in my mouth -into the mountains!”

“Sorry.” Kashira snickered. “And you mean the mountains we used to train in?”

“Yeah, those mountains.” She grinned. Ah, good times, good times.

“Say, where’s Daichi at?”

Yuka blinked. “Ah, she’s in the point group.”

“Man, the same one that’s being attacked right now? What a crappy way to reunite with your older sister!” Kashira complained. The motorcycle took a hard left, and then suddenly they were driving over hard dirt, and the sounds of the fighting faded behind them. “She and Kirigakure get back together?”

“Ha! They sure did! I’ll bet Daichi’ll get her into a ring within the year.”

“Daichi? Heck no, it’ll take her at least a year and a half!” Kashira countered. 

“Buuuut, they were spending the night with each other, y’know. Every night?”

“...dang, they’re moving fast, huh?”

Yuka snickered. A minute or so of their break-neck speed continued, and she could feel her familiars growing closer behind them. Then, her ghouls overtook them, running up ahead to scope out the path. They reported back a faint scent of the group, but one that was quickly growing closer. There had been demons along the path, as well- more hounds. Shit.

If anyone were able to keep up in a fight against fire demons, it would be the point group. She had sent her best water demon tamers along with them, after all. But, they had kids with them, and kids to protect always managed to complicate everything. Throw in Iblis, and…

“Man, this is about to be a shit show…” she muttered to herself.

Another minute passed, and then Kashira was slowing, the roar of the engine dying down to give way to the sounds of snarling and shouting. Yuka felt the rest of her good mood drop, taken over by a sense of foreboding. There was someone screaming, and panicked yelling — she thought she could recognize the voices of a few of the kids. Then, gunshots, rapid fire. A cough, the splattering of something liquid, a shout of a name — “Nagai!”

“Inoue, please! Stop! They’re just children!” another voice pleaded, torn with panic and desperation.

Inoue…?

The bike skidded to a halt, and Yuka hopped off, feeling the wet brush of Murder Cat up against her leg.

“What is it?” she asked, low, as Kashira brushed past her.

_ “The exorcists are down and out,”  _ Murder Cat told her, tense by her side.  _ “There’s a woman, and a boy on the ground. He seems sick. There’s another boy by his side. The woman- Iblis, and her body-” _

“Daichi?” Alim called, voice confused and scared all at once. “What are you doing?”

_ “-her chosen body is Inoue Daichi.” _


	18. an escape, a warning, and a funeral of sorts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I hope you all had a happy Halloween, and that you won't be too mad at me for this chapter.

Rin was dying.

Yukio had never been more sure of anything in his life. He kneeled in the dirt, trying to shake Rin awake, but his face was pale and his skin was hot and he was  _ dying.  _ His pulse was a feather light, rapid pace  _ bump-bump-bump _ beneath the skin of his wrist, but no matter how hard Yukio shook him, he was not waking. 

He was dying.

Yukio ripped his gun from the holster and gripped Rin tight in his free arm, eyes wide and breath quick and panicked in his chest. He pointed the crosshairs of the gun to the woman before him, to Iblis and Inoue Daichi, all in the same body. Betrayal stung hot and heavy in his chest, alongside the stuttering, electric thrum of fear in his chest.

The other exorcists were out of commission. His students were barely defending themselves against the hounds and the sharp talons of the phoenix women who had ambushed them. Rin was out cold and only growing hotter as the seconds passed, his skin burning beneath Yukio’s grip. Yukio was alone, against Gehenna’s Demon King of Fire, and there was no one coming to help him. 

Both he, and Inoue knew this.

“Yukio,” she called, gentle, even despite the curling flames across her body. “You won’t win.”

“Shut up!” he hissed, only gripping his gun tighter. 

He had to think of a way out of here. He could carry Rin, maybe, but getting Iblis off of his tail was going to be harder. He didn’t have any holy water bullets left, only regular silver-tipped. He didn’t know Iblis’ fatal verse, or if she even had one. He didn’t —

He didn’t have anything.

Her expression was sad, drawn, and the worst part was, he knew it was genuine. “I don’t want to hurt you, honey. Just let me have Rin, and we can be done, alright?”

“No.” He shook his head, near violently. Inoue took a step forward, and he flicked the safety off, cocking the gun with trembling fingers. “Stay back!”

“I promise I won’t hurt him,” she continued, holding her hands up. “We need him alive. I promise he’ll be safe.”

“You expect me to believe you?” Yukio demanded, hysterical. “After this? I know you’re lying!”

They wouldn’t be keeping Rin safe. What a joke! They wanted him for one thing, and one thing only — to give Satan a body. If they did, and Rin managed to survive, he knew the Order would stop at nothing to kill Rin, to deny Satan a way back into Assiah. He couldn’t let it happen. He couldn’t let them have him.

He couldn’t let Rin die.

“You can’t stop it. It’s better to give him over now, before more people get hurt,” Inoue said, tone soft and sympathetic.

“No, please-” His voice broke on the word, and his breath hitched on a sob. “Please, he’s- he’s my brother! He’s all I have left!”

Shiro was hospitalized. Shura left them. Yukio had no one else, nobody but Rin. He couldn’t lose his brother, too. But then his twin groaned, painful and pitiful, and Yukio knew that whether he gave Rin over or not, he was already-

“-dying, Yukio.” Inoue said it like she knew what he was thinking, and he jerked his head up, eyes wide. “He needs help. The Illuminati can help him survive. You know what’s happening, right?”

He couldn’t say anything, frozen in place. He looked to the sword, quick, then back up. The blade was shattered, and though Inoue was the one to break it, she looked regretful already. 

“The sword held his power, and now that it’s broken, his demon heart is returning to his body,” she explained. “And he won’t be able to handle the strain. He’ll die, if we don’t help him.”

“He’ll die if you do!” There wasn’t a way out of this. The Illuminati could take Rin, and the Order would kill him. Yukio could retreat back to Tottori, but the exorcists would likely revolt and kill him anyways. Shiro couldn’t protect him. Shura  _ wouldn’t _ protect him.

He only had one option left.

With his eyes on Inoue, and his gun held tight, he gently lowered his brother to the ground. From his belt, he unhooked and withdrew a knife, and a sheaf of summoning papers, ignoring the shaking of his hand. He held the blade up to his forearm, and bit back a grunt as the knife drew blood. Yukio dropped the knife to the ground and held the summoning papers beneath his bleeding arm, as Inoue realized his intentions.

“Don’t,” she warned. “If you run, I can’t help you. This is Iblis’ game. You want to work with me.”

“I want my brother alive.” He breathed, more sure than he felt. “And I’ll do whatever it takes to make that happen.”

Yukio threw the blood-streaked papers to the ground, and gritted his teeth, pulling up every name he could recall.

“Daphne, Sinope, Kyrene-” Each name brought forth a burst of water from the papers, and as the sparkling bodies of the naiads rose from the ground, he could feel his energy slipping away, bit by bit. Fear was the only thing keeping him running. “-Salamis, Minthe!”

Five naiads stood before him, their smiling faces turned towards Inoue. With the wall of demons, Yukio let his gun hand drop, and sucked in a desperate breath as the last of the drain hit him. It was too much of a strain, and black spots crossed his vision, but he clung onto his remaining frantic energy as tight as he could.

He prayed it was enough. It had to be enough.

“This is a mistake, Yukio!”

“I don’t care.” He wheezed, chest heaving for air. It was through an inhuman amount of strength that he got his gun back in his belt and grabbed for Rin, managing to get his brother up onto his back with a frustrating amount of effort. Yukio looped his arms around his brother’s legs, and with a grunt, got his feet underneath him, wobbling up to standing. His vision did blur then, dangerously, but he shook his head until his vision cleared.

Through the wall of naiads, he could see Inoue’s frown deepen, as her eyes shifted from a warm brown to a cold, amber, and he knew that he wasn’t looking at Inoue anymore. Iblis stood before him, looking at the naiads as if they were mere annoyances.

“You will regret this, little brother,” Iblis said, low and dangerous. “I warned you once. I do not give second chances.”

And then, there was fire erupting on the ground, making a blazing path towards the spirits he’d summoned. As the naiads threw their arms up, he turned away, and didn’t wait for things to go to shit to make his decision.

He ran.

Running was a loose term, really. With Rin’s weight on his back and the growing emptiness from the effort of keeping the naiads summoned, he managed a stumble, at best. But adrenaline kept him up right, and fear kept him moving, as the sound of Iblis’ frustrated growl and the hissing of fire against water faded off somewhere behind him.

Yukio didn’t know where he was going. He couldn’t go home. He couldn’t go to the Order. He couldn’t go to the Illuminati. The only option was away, as far as he could go, as hidden as he could get Rin from the rest of the world.

Rin groaned again, breath hot against Yukio’s neck, and he forced himself to ignore it. He could figure out the demon heart and the overheating once they were safe.

He just had to get them somewhere safe. 

Branches cracked and snapped beneath his feet, the wind picking up with the promise of an incoming storm. Good. The rain water would help ease the strain of the naiads. His legs burned with exertion, and he could practically feel his spine creaking beneath Rin’s weight, but he pushed on, eyes glued to the path before him. There were trees everywhere, and they were on a mountain. All he had to do was find a cave, or something. Just somewhere hidden.

There were gunshots somewhere behind him, and more screaming. He ignored it. He couldn’t think about anything but Rin. 

“Just find a cave.” He whispered, breathless. “Find a cave, find a cave, find a cave.”

He stumbled over a root on the ground and cursed aloud, steadying himself before pushing on in his grueling march. One of the naiads had been de-summoned, which meant he was running out of time. He needed to go faster.

Rin made another noise, something between a whine and a breath. “...Yu..”

“Shh.” Yukio said, quick, sharp. He couldn’t waste any time talking, and Rin couldn’t waste the energy.

“Where…” His brother’s voice was hoarse as he kept on. “Where we… we go’n?”

“We’re running away.” Even as he said it aloud, he knew it was stupid-  _ so fucking stupid!  _ They wouldn’t make it. Yukio was running against his body, and every demon and exorcist on the face of Tokyo, but what else could he do? What other option did he have left? “Be- Be still, go back to sleep.”

“...don’t feel good.” Rin’s voice was wet with something like tears. “Hot. ‘s hot.”

Yukio gritted his teeth, fighting back down the suffocating feeling of helplessness. “I know. I know.”

“Gotta take me back,” Rin whispered, defeated.

“I-” Yukio looked up from the ground just long enough to trip over his feet again, but when he stumbled, Rin twisted in his grip, and suddenly they were both crashing to the ground. He felt his ankle twist sharply, and his elbow crashed against the ground, drawing a sharp cry from him. He could feel Rin still sprawled across the back of his legs, and grunted as he twisted himself around.

“Gotta go back,” Rin said again, eyes half lidded as he looked up at the sky.

“We can’t!” The shout tore free from his throat abruptly, violently. Yukio crawled close to his brother, but when he reached out to take Rin up again, he clumsily batted Yukio’s hands aside. “Rin,  _ please-” _

“Yukio.” He said, face blank. Yukio froze — his brother had never looked so empty. “We have to.”

And for once, he paused. He listened to Rin, and chanced a question. “...why?”

Rin only looked at him, eyes dark and solemn, wet with tears. He reached a hand down to the hem of his shirt, and with no small amount of effort, managed to pull the cloth up. Yukio watched, confused, and then-

His heart stopped. At the center of Rin’s chest was a star engraved in black, turned upside down with the likeness of a goat at its center. It was the sign of a deal.

It was the sign of a deal with Satan.

“Rin, you…” His mouth opened, then closed, and the world felt like it had fallen from beneath him. He felt horror crawling up his throat, eyes wide. “What did you do?”

Instead of responding, his brother said nothing. Only closed his eyes, and somehow, that was worse.

* * *

It was when a hellhound clamped its jaws down around his ankle that Ryuji felt the thought hit him that maybe, exorcism was not at all what the thought it was cracked up to be. He could barely hear Konekomaru calling out his name around the searing hot pain of teeth dug deep into his skin, too focused on choking back a shout of pain to verbally respond. Konekomaru’s small hands grabbed his arm, and he used it as leverage enough to get his foot free and up into the air.

From there, he drove his heel into the hound’s nose, sending it flying back with a whimper and a growl. Ryuji scrambled up to his feet, keeping his weight off of his bleeding ankle in favor of looking at the massive clusterfuck that their group had become. 

The adults were long since down and out. Kamiki was just barely managing to keep the demons at bay with her byakko, but Shima was grimacing around where his superheated staff was burning his hands, and Moriyama was flagging quickly. The demons were starting to move in.

“Oh, backup! Thank God!”

Shima’s relieved sigh wasn’t enough to lessen the tension in his shoulders — because when he looked back at the other end of the clearing, the Okumuras were gone, leaving a group of naiads behind and a very, very angry looking Iblis. 

(God, he was so stupid. Miss Inoue had been Iblis the entire time, and he hadn’t even suspected a thing.)

Shima was already retreating back, alongside Moriyama and Kamiki, and Ryuji found his eyes drawn to the trio who had arrived to their rescue. He recognized the demon woman — Ohashi, he’d heard her name, but the two others were new. They bore the same dark skin as Miss Inoue, and a striking resemblance to each other, mirroring each other’s expression of horror as they looked across the clearing.

“Miss Inoue’s totally gone rogue!” Shima cried, utterly oblivious to the emotions of two newcomers as he retreated back behind their bikes, hiding half behind both Kamiki and Moriyama. “She’s all fire demon now, what the hell!” 

“She hasn’t gone rogue, you idiot, she’s always been rogue!” Kamiki snapped, though her breath was quick and her eyes were wide. 

“Hey, kids, chill out!” Ohashi called, frowning. “All of you, get back here and let us handle this, yeah?”

Ryuji took one look at the ghouls by her side, and decided in that one moment that she was safer than anything they had. He took Konekomaru’s hand, and the two of them booked it behind the motorcycles, drawing up close to the rest of the group. He could hear Iblis’ frustrated scream and the hiss of steam and water, but the trio of adults in front of him caught his attention.

“How did this happen?” the man was asking, his expression a complex mix of hurt and confusion as he held the woman’s sleeve. They looked like siblings, twins, even. “Daichi wouldn’t… is that really her?”

The woman didn’t look like she hadn’t any more answers, only looking to Ohashi. “Did you know, Yuka?”

“I didn’t.” Ohashi shook her head, frown still intense. “Did you?”

“Daichi wouldn’t do this,” the woman said, looking back to where Iblis turned the naiads to steam with the touch of her hand, expression enraged, unrelenting, even as the naiads let out pained wails. “She- she was the good girl, she- I don’t understand! Why is that beast wearing Daichi’s face?!”

“Kashira, listen!” Ryuji watched her hand rest against the woman’s arm, with startling accuracy. “We don’t have time for this, we got kids to protect, remember?”

As if on cue, the last of the naiads fell, in a burst of steam and light that had her phasing out of Assiah. Iblis was bent over, every inch the demon king as boiling water rolled off of her skin, condensation puffing from her mouth with every breath. Her eyes were a vivid red that had Ryuji tensing as she whirled to face them, Daichi’s gentle face twisted so thoroughly in anger.

“Where did they go?” she demanded.

“The Okumuras,” Konekomaru whispered, then raised his voice as he looked up to the trio. “They escaped! Okumura-sensei called the naiads up and left!”

The memory of Rin’s screams hit him, with the feeling of burning skin beneath his fingers and Okumura-sensei’s desperate pleas — and he forced them aside. He couldn’t think about it now. He couldn’t.

“Shit,” Ohashi hissed.

“You can’t stop this!” Iblis shouted. “The Illuminati will have him! I’ll stop at-”

“-at what, Daichi?” the man cut in. “You’ll let this woman use you to kill a child?”

Though Iblis’ eyes flashed back to the brown of Miss Inoue’s, her expression only grew more animalistic. “You don’t understand! There are greater forces in play in this world than you can even comprehend! If this is what it takes, then- then I don’t care what I’m used to do!”

“So you did,” Kashira realized, aloud. “You gave yourself up, didn’t you? Willingly.”

Miss Inoue hesitated, heaving for breath in her adrenaline high. Something seemed to flash in her eyes, something like insecurity, like regret. But Ryuji watched as the emotion fell away, instead giving way to deadly surety. 

When she spoke again, her voice was more even. “I did. And I’ll do it again.”

Then the exorcist was gone, and Iblis took her place, incensed enough to more than make up for her previous absence. Ryuji found himself stepping back, pulse loud and heavy in his ears. 

They’d prepared for fire demons, but not the king herself.

“Kids.” Ohashi called, still looking straight ahead. Her shoulders were set, and her ghouls’ teeth bared. “Go back and get back up, yeah?”

“I’ll not let more escape,” Iblis promised, darkly. “You will not get far.”

The water on her skin set to boiling in the blink of an eye, evaporating as great bursts of red, hot fire exploded from the ground, bringing with it the sounds of sinister hissing and howling. Ohashi’s hand flashed to a knife by her side, and even Kashira and the man drew their guns, determined despite the tears in their eyes. 

Just before all hell broke loose, Ohashi gave them one last order- “Run!”

And they did.

Kamiki spearheaded their group, her byakko by her feet as they turned tail and ran. Shima reached out a hand to help Moriyama along, Paku just behind her as Ryuji headed up the rear. Panic had him shoving Konekomaru up in front of himself, as he twisted his head back just long enough to see the first cracking gunshot explode in the clearing.

“It’s just straight this way, right?” Kamiki called, drawing his attention back to the group in front of him. 

Konekomaru nodded. “Yeah! We just followed the path!” 

The sounds of crackling fire and shouting fell away behind them, in favor of the almost ominously quiet forest. He could hear the sounds of fighting if he strained his ears, of demons elsewhere in the city, of explosions and gunshots and screaming.

“Do you think Rin and Yuki are okay?” Shiemi’s cheeks were red with emotion, her lip trembling.

Shima shook his head, grim. “They didn’t look good!”

_ Rin, out cold and lifeless, and Okumura-sensei, bleeding, wide-eyed- _

“Who cares about them?!” Kamiki demanded. “We’re about to die! We have to worry about ourselves first!”

“I know, just-” Moriyama’s voice cracked on a sob, even as she furiously rubbed at her eyes. “God, this is just awful!”

“Yeah.” Ryuji couldn’t help but agree. He could feel his own eyes prickling harshly, but he fought it back, fought it down. “This is ass.”

“ _ Huge _ ass,” Shima added on, a sardonic little grin on his face.

Paku was startled into a laugh, as dirt and branches cracked and crunched beneath their feet. “Huge, gigantic ass!”

“The biggest ass a situation could possibly be!”

Even if it was the end of the world, they found laughter for just a brief second, knowing it could very well be the last time. Like Miss Inoue had said, the world was much bigger than they’d thought, initially, and it was quickly starting to collapse down onto them. If they were going to be crushed under it, then maybe they could have one last joke.

“If we survive this, I’m dropping out,” Shima sighed.

Ryuji was almost tempted to agree. Almost.

The corridor of trees was starting to thin around them, giving way to tall buildings and the smoking sky of the city. The sounds of the fight were closer now, shouting and yelling alike renting the air with the screeches of demons.

“Kids!”

Ryuji’s head snapped up, and he saw the familiar bright hue of Miss Kirigakure’s hair. She was waving a frantic arm at them, the Arc Knights by her side, and her sword in hand. 

As soon as they were close enough, she was dropping her sword, reaching out to touch their heads in turn, as if counting each of them. “What happened?”

“We- Miss Daichi, she-” Moriyama stuttered, and Ryuji realized why. Now that Miss Kirigakure was before them, he found his mouth going dry as well.

“And where are the others?” As soon as her head count finished, her eyes widened, and her shoulders grew tense. “The Okumuras, where are they?!”

“Iblis possessed Miss Daichi.” Ryuji found himself saying, and immediately grimaced at the half truth. Miss Kirigakure looked up to him, eyes widening further, eyebrows furrowed. “The Okumuras escaped.”

_ Looking like death. _

“Esc- Escaped where? Nevermind, we ain’t got the time to talk!” She turned to the Arc Knights where they stood, leaning down to pick up her katana as she did so. “Iblis infiltrated the point group, then-”

“She’s still up there!” Kamiki interrupted. “With Miss Ohashi, and two other people? They look- they looked like Miss Daichi.”

Miss Kirigakure looked back to them, mouth falling open. “Kashira? And Alim?”

“I think so! I heard someone say Kashira!” Paku chimed in, a hand on Moriyama’s arm. 

“Then we have to go.” Miss Kirigakure said, resolutely, and turned to the Knights again. “Lewin, I could use you, and Lucy. Osceola, can you and Dragulesc keep watch over the battle?”

“Of course.” The tall man nodded, while Dragulesc only stood silently.

“Where are we goin’?” Lightning asked, airy, even despite the chaos around them.

“We’re backing up Ohashi and the twins, and getting the Okumuras back,” Miss Kirigakure declared, striding past through the group and towards the mountains.

Lightning grinned, following behind her obediently alongside Lucy. “Gotcha~”

“And you all!” She whirled about to point a finger at them, expression stern. “You stay  _ here,  _ you got me? No chargin’ off into danger! I mean it! I will kick you all out of the exwire program if you disobey me, ya hear?”

Ryuji nodded, but it was more for show, than anything. Watching her leave back up the mountain, with rising pillars of smoke and fire sprouting up from the trees and the exwires filing off behind him, he felt conflicted. The weight of Miss Kirigakure’s order was a set of heavy chains, but he couldn’t…

Ryuji couldn’t ignore what he’d seen anymore. He couldn’t forget the Okumuras, the broken sword, Okumura-sensei’s frantic attempts to protect his brother. He wanted to help — more than anything. He wanted them both to live. He wanted to fix things. He wanted to make up with Okumura.

He wanted a great many things, and all of them seemed to start with taking that first step up the mountain.

“Bon?”

Ryuji looked back to see Shima waiting for him, but the expression on his face was a mix of frustration and resignation.

“Please don’t tell me you’re thinkin’ of going up there,” the other boy pleaded.

“They need the help,” Ryuji offered, weakly. It wasn’t a good excuse, and they both knew it.

Shima frowned, and there was something intense in his eyes. “Don’t. Stay here.”

“They’re fightin’ alone up there. Miss Kirigakure might not be able to get to ‘em, if she’s fightin’ with- with Miss Daichi,” he argued.

“Bon!” Shima reached out to grab his shoulder, grip tight and face angry. “I’m bein’ serious! Don’t go, I mean it!”

But there was a weight in his words, something frantic in Shima’s grip that seemed  _ wrong.  _ It suddenly felt as if he was looking at someone else, and not the lazy, laidback Shima he’d grown up with.

“...what’s goin’ on with you?” he asked, eyebrows furrowing and eyes narrowing.

As if realizing it as well, Shima’s eyes widened, and he abruptly dropped his hand. Like a shutter, his expression went back to neutral. “Nothin’, dude. I just know I gotta come barreling after your ass if you throw yourself up in danger, y’know?”

“Sure,” he said slowly, and reluctantly followed after Shima to join the other exwires. “We’re talkin’ about this later.”

Almost imperceptibly, Shima’s shoulders tightened, then abruptly released. The smile he turned back to Ryuji was a closed-eyed one.

“Cool with me.”

* * *

“Say, you’re pretty close to that Inoue Daichi, hmm?”

Shura grimaced at the onslaught of Lewin’s pestering, trying to tune most of him out. Normally, she might have the patience for his roundabout bush-beating, but this was not a normal situation, by any stretch of the imagination.

“You two dated for some time, right?”

She huffed, and turned her head to face him. “What does this gotta do with anything?”

He only grinned at her from around Lucy on his shoulder. “Just curious! If she’s been possessed, then it’s pretty likely she’ll die, you know.”

“...yeah.” Shura looked back ahead, refusing to be baited. She knew that — both she and Daichi knew that there was a chance that either of them could end up going down in a fight, or a mission. Every good exorcist worth their salt knew that.

“You might have to kill her, too.”

And she knew that. She did.

“I’ll do what I gotta,” Shura said aloud, feeling distinctly like she was trying to convince herself too. “I know my duties. She knows hers, too.”

If it came down to herself, Daichi, and whatever demon was possessing her, then she could do it. She could put Daichi out of her misery. She could.

“Reality is often very different from concept,” Lucy said, evenly.

“Jesus, do y’all know somethin’ that I don’t?” Shura turned to face them, glaring. “I don’t want to kill her. Is that what you wanna hear? I don’t want her to die, but life ain’t about what you want.”

It never was. Shura didn’t get the perfect family. She didn’t get a mom, or Shiro, or the boys, or Daichi. That wasn’t how life worked, and she knew that, and in her mind, it was pointless to pick at wounds that had already scabbed over. Of all the times to bleed, this wasn’t one of them.

“Youth.” Lucy only chuckled. “So passionate.”

“So hot headed!” Lewin agreed.

Shura scowled and jabbed an elbow into Lewin’s side, ignoring his offended cry of pain. 

The closer they got to the heart of the forest, the thicker that the acrid scent of smoke grew, and the louder the sounds of battle became. Shura felt herself picking up her pace, ignoring Lewin’s snicker in favor of following the seared footsteps left behind by fire demons. Apprehension and dread grew into a heavy stone in her stomach, her nerves wrapped tight around it. 

And then she spotted the familiar glint of the Inoue twins’ motorcycles, only seconds before a shout rang out and Alim came skidding across the ground. His back cracked against the trunk of the tree, and he grunted, trying to get his pistol back up in front of him. Before he could, a figure crossed the clearing in a blur, and an explosion of fire came just before the figure crouched above Alim, a flaming fist driven into the bark just where his face had been.

But Alim had his gun up, and pointed the barrel at the woman above him, expression twisted into a fierce scowl even with the glistening of tear tracks down his cheeks.

“Go on,” the woman said, almost goading. “Shoot.”

But Shura knew that voice, and felt her blood run cold. “...Daichi?”

The woman froze, and looked up. Even through the demonic vibrancy of her reddened irises, and the foreign presence in her body, Shura would recognize her lover anywhere. That was Daichi.

“Shura!” Alim shouted, and though Shura heard him, she couldn’t drag her eyes away from the other woman. Something like horror, and a paralyzing fascination, had her glued into place. “Daichi gave her body up to Iblis! She betrayed us!”

_...what? _

But as soon as the words were out, the red of her irises flashed away back to her dark brown, and her face went from cruel neutrality to distress.

“No!” she gasped out, stumbling away from Alim and towards Shura. “Not you, lovely, never you!”

“What is this?” Shura found herself asking, numbly. “What did you do?”

“I can’t protect you on my own!” Daichi cried, desperate. Like she knew what she had become, and was trying to justify herself, to excuse herself. “I needed- I needed more, to keep you safe! This was the only way!”

The truth was clear. Daichi had even admitted to it herself, didn’t even try to deny it — she’d given herself over to Iblis. She’d given a demon king a way into Assiah. All of this had happened because… because Daichi betrayed them. Shura let out a breath, and an ache settled into her chest, one that had her lungs constricting and her eyes prickling with tears.

And when the truth set in, Daichi knew it too.

“Shura, please, you have to understand.” Daichi pleaded, and the worst part of it was the frantic sincerity in her words. “This was for you!”

And that wasn’t a lie, was it? Daichi had done this for Shura. She’d created an excuse in her mind, that Shura was worth the carnage, the death, the endangerment of the exwires, the endangerment of  _ Rin and Yukio.  _ Even now, Shura knew why she was so torn, so distressed — not at the damage she’d created, but at the thought that Shura wouldn’t understand that she was the reason why it had all happened.

She knew what she had to do, the decision that had fallen to her, and for a second, she broke under it. Shura breathed out, and her breath hitched, and for a second, everything just  _ hurt. _

“Why?” she asked, voice small, quiet. She knew she wouldn’t get an answer, not one that would make any of this better, but she just didn’t understand. 

They’d let themselves think that they could have a future, this time, and they could have. They could have had happiness. They could have had a chance, but Daichi had thrown it all away, for power, for weakness, for Iblis. And Shura knew that there was only one way this would end.

The weight of her katana in her palm felt like carrying rocks, like fighting against the weight of the world as she tried to shove the shards of her broken heart back into something manageable. Daichi’s eyes, raw and sincere, widened, and then for a moment Shura could see her own despair reflected in Daichi’s brown eyes.

Alim stood behind her, eyes reddened and wet behind the crosshairs of his pistol. When he went to squeeze the trigger, Shura closed her eyes, and heard the sound of the shot going off. Daichi’s shout of pain turned demonic toward the end, and when Shura opened her eyes, it was to Iblis, clutching her bloodied shoulder with a furious snarl.

“You’ll pay for that,” she hissed, scrambling back from Alim.

“Not as much as you will,” he said, eyes narrowed.

He fired off another shot, a second, in quick succession. Iblis jumped back and away from the bullets, but Shura could see a matching gunshot wound on her thigh now, one that had her wincing as she stood. 

“I think we ought to leave this to them, ah?” She could hear Lewin asking from behind her, followed by Lucy’s quiet hum.

That was fine, then.

A nick of her thumb had blood smearing across the blade of her katana, and she lept in with Alim, with Kashira tending to the fallen exorcists. Iblis was a demon king, through and through, but Shura knew Daichi’s fighting tells, knew her instincts.

Iblis ducked under another shot from Alim, and Shura was ready for when she backed up, her blade cutting a deep line through her side. She rolled with the momentum, and though Iblis reached up to grab her blade, bare handed, Shura pushed with all of her strength, until the demon king threw her katana aside with a growl.

Shura let the sword go, and instead ducked up beneath Iblis’ swinging arm, driving a fist deep into the demon’s stomach. Iblis wheezed and doubled over, and as Shura jumped back, a gunshot rang out, and burst against the bone of Iblis’ knee. She took her blade up again, feeling hollow, and numb, as Iblis stumbled to the ground.

They were at a standstill — death was coming for Daichi, and defeat for Iblis.

The demon king knew it, and glared up at her, clutching the wound at her side.

“I’ll be back,” she swore. 

Shura only looked down at her, laying the edge of her blade against Daichi’s throat. “I’ll kill you again, when you do.”

For ruining everything. For tempting Daichi. For endangering her boys. For destroying any chance she had at living happy, and fulfilled, with a family by her side.

She twisted her hand, pulled the blade, and it was over.

Blood splattered against the ground, and Daichi’s body fell to the dirt, limply. Lifelessly. She was gone before her head even hit the forest floor, only holding onto life with Iblis’ energy. Shura’s hand fell open, and her sword clattered to the ground, and it was only a second later that she was, too.

Her knees hit the ground, eyes glued onto Daichi’s face, to where her brown eyes still laid open, unfocused .  E mpty. Gone.

And she cried.

Like a baby — great, heaving sobs that rent the air and tore her throat apart. She dug her palms deep into her eyes, and cried, doubled over so hard that she could feel the cloth of Daichi’s uniform against her forehead. 

Everything she’d ever let herself want, and it was all gone.

Even what felt like hours later, when the tears finally dried, when she’d given so much that she felt she didn’t have more to give, it hurt. God, did it hurt. Alim and Kashira came to sit by her, and whatever stop she managed to put on the tears came undone as soon as Alim cracked.

He cried against her shoulder, but her eyes were glued to Daichi’s, still frozen, like if she looked away, her lover really would be gone. But Kashira reached a trembling hand out, and lowered Daichi’s eyes, and the illusion was broken.

“ Inna lillahi... wa inna ilayhi raji'un,” she whispered, voice thick with tears. 

“Kirigakure,” came the gentle voice of Lucy, just before the older woman’s hand touched her shoulder. “We have to move on, dear.”

In a way, she was glad that the woman wasn’t trying to offer advice, or some old lesson. There was nothing in this moment that could make things better, nothing that could bring Daichi back to life, or seal over the hole she’d left behind. Nor even if there were, would they have the time to spend on it.

Because Yukio and Rin were still on the run, and someone had to get them.

(No matter how much she’d rather just lie down beside Daichi, and fall asleep.)

(Preferably, a sleep she just might not wake up from.)


	19. a capture, a revelation, and an apology made too late

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!PLEASE READ THIS NOTE!!!
> 
> Hey guys, I want to kind of break my usual pattern of chapter warnings and be particularly careful and thorough with this one. This chapter has multiple discussions of suicide, a suicidal character, and passive suicidal ideation. I know this topic can be triggering for many people, so please take caution while you read and be attentive to yourself, if this is an upsetting topic for you. If you are concerned and want to know more specifics of how the topic is handled in the chapter, please keep reading. However, if you are okay to go ahead and read the chapter, then this is all I would like you to read. Thank you.
> 
> For the others who would like more information, the suicidal character is Rin. He reveals a plan for assisted suicide (hence why he never really protested his execution), and views it as a necessary thing to save his friends and family. However, his suicide is not a necessary thing, nor is it encouraged by Shura and Yukio. They react with shock and anger, but towards Rin's idea that they would be okay with him dying. The chapter ends on a somewhat depressing note, with Yukio realizing that there is nothing he can do to stop Rin's plan. 
> 
> However, in the next chapters, Rin's plan is not allowed to take place, and an alternate solution is found. He does not commit suicide, his suicidal ideation is shut down and discouraged by his family, and as I've said before, this fic will end happily. These last chapters are going to be rather intense and triggering sometimes, but I'm keeping my promise.

* * *

If you have not read the note at the beginning yet, please do so.

* * *

Shura could tell that Yukio was flagging.

Dusk was beginning to fall, and the steady line of his footsteps in the dirt was starting to grow fuzzier. She could see the scuffed marks of where he’d dragged his feet, the broken branches where he’d leaned against a tree, the steady drip of blood in the mark of each footprint. He was getting sloppier, and she was catching up. 

Alim had stayed behind with Daichi’s body, leaving Kashira at Shura’s side and the two Arc Knights behind her. With the passing hours and the loss of their leader, the fire demons in the city had slowly and methodically been purged, and she knew that they would be joined by the rest of the exorcists soon. It was an order that she didn’t want to give, but with the two known sons of Satan on the run from the Order, she’d had no choice.

“Locate and apprehend Okumura Rin and Yukio, at any costs.”

She couldn’t afford to let them run loose, not with the Illuminati back up and in the running, and not after what the living members of the point group had told her — _ Okumura Rin’s sword was broken.  _ He’d flamed up, bright enough to blind them before his body had abruptly and painfully shut down, and that was enough to fill in the blanks for her. His sword had been holding his demon heart, and now that it was loose, there was no telling what would happen. 

(So for their sakes, she prayed that the Order would get to them first.)

(Or better yet, that she would.)

Shura fought against the stubborn drag of her body against her, trudging on ahead through the dim light and the low hanging trees. The other three with her had been deadly silent, and she felt no urge to break the quiet, not outside of the snapping of leaves and twins beneath her feet. Finding the boys was more important.

Then, the radio at her hip crackled, and Ohashi’s voice came forth.  _ “Oi, Shura, I’ve met up with the reinforcements. We’ll be on your trail asap.” _

She took up her radio, murmured an ‘understood’, and clipped it back onto her waist. Shura didn’t speak any further, but even so, she could feel Lewin’s expectant eyes at the back of her head.

“Seems like they’ve gotten themselves into quite a bit of trouble this time, huh?” he wondered aloud, and she could feel her shoulders tensing. “They barely got out alive last time, how do you propose you’ll-”

Something like a rubber band snapped in her chest. With a red hot burst of rage, she whirled around, gripping Lewin’s jacket tight and slamming him against the tree with a harsh  _ crack.  _ Kashira shouted her name, but her eyes were on Lewin, where the asshole had the audacity to  _ grin  _ even with her arm pressed tight against his throat.

“What the fuck are you gettin’ at?” she hissed, teeth bared. Shura thought the man might have some common sense, now, of all times!   


“I don’t know what you mean~” he singsonged, hands reaching up to hold her wrists loosely. “Just thinking out loud!”

Her eyes narrowed. “Then say it! Say whatever the hell it is!”

“You have no plan, you know.” Though his tone didn’t change at all, his eyes were bright, and his words were sharp. “Your lack of forethought got your girlfriend killed, didn’t it? What exactly do you plan to do? The Satan spawn will surely be branded traitors, now.”

“About time.” A tired voice cut in, and Shura released Lewin to the ground in one swift movement. She looked to the approaching voice and saw Angel maneuvering his way around the trees, irrately ducking beneath branches and leaves. He turned a frown up to her, and crossed his arms as he came to a stop beside then. “Why would you leave me behind? You know I don’t prefer the doctor’s company.”

“Not now, Angel,” she said, sharply. Maybe one of them, she could deal with, but not both.

Angel recoiled, eyes wide, and then turned to Lewin. “I am… fairly certain I haven’t done anything to deserve that. Yet.”

“Her girlfriend was the Iblis host,” Lewin told him, and for the second time in as many minutes, Shura seriously considered manslaughter.

“Oh.” He blinked, something unreadable in his expression. “And you were the one to…?”

Shura opened her mouth, then closed it. She didn’t even have the decency of calling the gaping wound in her chest raw — no, it was still bleeding, still aching, and hurt even more fiercely at the reminder. When she spoke, her voice was raw, and the word burned her to say. “Yes.”

“What’s done is done,” Lucy said, gently, but firmly. “But if we don’t get back to work now, those boys will have a lot more hiding places to choose from.”

Shura swallowed her emotion down, and nodded. A soft hand touched her own, and she looked down to see Kashira’s fingers lacing together with hers, as the other woman gave her a squeeze. It was a grounding feeling, and she squeezed Kashira’s hand back before letting her go.

“Later,” she said, simply, and Kashira gave her a nod.

They set onto the trail again, and this time, without any more interruptions. As the darkness of night began to fall, Lewin summoned his light faeries to light up the path, casting an eerie yellow glow over the woods. The footprints in the dirt were harder to see, now, but when she squinted, the blood looked fresher — still wet. They were in the area, then.   


With that, she held a hand up to the group, motioning for caution and silence. She didn’t want to hunt the boys down like this, like rabid animals, but they left her no choice. If ambushing them was the only way to save them, then that’s what she would have to do.

“There,” Angel murmured, somewhere behind her. He extended a hand past her shoulder, pointing to where the steady splatters of blood had turned to smears and smudges. There were visible gouges scored in the earth, like something had fallen and been clumsily dragged away.

Then, there was the click of a gun.

Shura froze, and slowly looked up from the ground. In the darkness between the trees, she could see the glint of a pistol muzzle, and just beyond it, the reflection of light against glass. The faeries shifted, and then she could see tear-streaked teal eyes, near manic beyond the thin, cold facade. Her eyes darted to the side, to the body in his free arm, and saw Rin — chest jumping with shallow breaths, cheeks flushed and red.

She held her hands up, slowly, but Yukio’s arm was steady.

“Yukio,” Shura started. “The kid needs help. Ya know we’re your best shot.”

“Funny,” he said, hollowly. “Iblis said the same thing.”

Shura let her eyes close, for just a few seconds, before she opened them again. “Daichi is dead. Iblis has no more host.”

“Is that supposed to make me trust you?” he demanded, only holding Rin closer to him. 

And he didn’t have any reason to, did he? It wasn’t like she’d ever given him a reason to, truly. Not in the hospital room, not any time before that, and certainly not any time after it. She’d chased them all away to keep herself safe, but now Daichi was dead, and Shiro was dying, and looking at the broken bond between them now, she knew she had made the wrong choice.

“No,” Shura said, eventually. “I was wrong.”

Yukio blinked, surprised. His gun arm lowered just the tiniest of a fraction, but his eyes were still on her.

“I wanted to do it alone,” she continued, lowering herself down into a crouch to look at him more evenly. The aching was coming back now, seeping into every word she let out. “I thought-  I thought it’d be easier. It wasn’t.”

Shura didn’t know why she was saying this aloud, but… it felt right. Like she needed to say all of this aloud, like she needed to open up.

“I shouldn’ta left you. Either of you. And I won’t, ever again. I swear.”

She couldn’t. She couldn’t take another loss. She couldn’t lose anyone else, not now.

And something must have been genuine enough, something must have stuck, because Yukio’s arm dropped, like the strings holding it up had been cut. Whatever calm he’d been clinging to broke away in great shards, leaving just him — scared, and alone.

“He’s…” Yukio swallowed, like he couldn’t bear to say it aloud. He reached down and took up Rin’s wrist, pulled it forward and offered it up to the light. Rin’s arm was a mottled, angry red that was growing blacker, and the burns were only growing farther up his body. “It’s from the inside.”

_ Fuck. _

He looked up at her, eyes raw and wide and vulnerable, and she knew that this was a test, an olive branch.

“Please,” he begged, his free hand reaching up to grip hers tightly.

But before she could answer, there was a flash of silver out of the corner of her eye, and the sound of something sharp sinking into skin. Shura’s eyes flashed up to Yukio, only to see something feathered and metal embedded deep into his neck. Terror flashed across his expression, only a breath before his eyes rolled up and he collapsed limply against the ground.

“Angel!” she shouted, but when she looked at him, he and the group looked just as confused as she did.

There were footsteps, then, the crunching of feet in the forest as dozens of exorcists crept forward into the light. One held a rifle, and she knew at once that he was the one who had shot the dart. 

“What the hell is going on?” Shura demanded. “I didn’t authorize any of this!”

“You didn’t need to, Kirigakure,” Dragulesc called, as he stepped forward from within the group. His expression was frustratingly, aggravatingly neutral. “The Grigori compounded your order. We’re being called to Italy immediately.”

But that didn’t lessen her anger any. “I had him! He was about to give up!”

“Okumura Yukio was declared a danger to himself and others, and if you have any interest in protecting him from worse, then you’ll ensure that you aren’t branded the same,” Dragulesc said sharply. The pointed look he was giving her made it obvious that he was trying to help, in some roundabout way. 

And he was right, as much as she hated to admit it. She needed to play along, for now.

So, Shura swallowed down her protests when people swarmed forwards, backed away when Yukio was picked up and off the ground. It was with more caution that Rin was lifted from the forest floor, but from there, the burns bubbling beneath his skin were growing startlingly more clear.

The exorcist holding him froze, clearly uncomfortable, as Dragulesc joined her, eyes narrowed slightly as he peered at the damage. He followed the burns up Rin’s arm and to his abdomen, and then, he tensed. She watched as he reached a hand up, and pulled the collar of Rin’s shirt down further, brows furrowed.

“What?” 

“This boy…” He looked back at her, his frown intense yet unreadable. “Did you know about this?”

Before she could ask what he meant, he motioned her forward, to where Rin’s shirt was still held down. Shura glanced over, dubious, and then saw what he meant — and all at once, knew exactly what it was. The goat brand, the sealing. It felt like the world falling down, and yet like emptiness, at the same time.

“...take him to an isolation dungeon,” she could hear Dragulesc saying. “The strongest barriers we have…”

As they carried on, she felt like she was hearing them underwater, or through some thick pane of glass. 

In an awful sort of way, everything made sense.

* * *

When Rin finally blinked awake, everything felt horribly, unbearably hot.

He groaned, but the sound died in his throat, too dry and cracked. He could feel himself lying against cool stone, but even when he twisted and curled into it, trying to chase that feeling of cold, it quickly heated up with the touch of his skin. 

Everything hurt. Everything burned.

“So you’re alive, then?”

Rin recognized the voice, but only barely. He was able to get his eyes open and his head around, just enough to see the vague outline of blonde hair and a white uniform. Was that the man, then, from the trial? 

“Where am I?” he managed to rasp out.

“Not anywhere you’re ever going to escape,” the man told him, frowning. “So I’d be worried about something more important.”

Ever going to escape? Rin glanced down at his body, at the shackles bound tight around his wrists and ankles, and made something of a guess. Whether they knew about his deal, or his sword breaking, he guessed either would be good enough to have him executed.

Ah. That was good, then.

“Why did you do it?”

The dude was still here? Rin tried to blink more of the blur out of his eyes, and was able to see enough just to recognize — _ Angel? That was his name, right? _ _ — _ from all those weeks ago. “Do what?”

“The deal,” he spat out, like the very words were foul on his tongue. 

Oh. They did know about it, then?

“For my dad,” Rin said, quietly. It was nice to finally be able to say it aloud, to let go of the secret he’d been holding onto for months. He wasn’t any good at secrets. “Except, he’s dying, so… for nothing, I guess.”

The weight of it settled deep into his bones, somehow even worse than the fever burning beneath his skin. Everything really had been for nothing. The fate he’d been trying to escape had just come right back for him, in the end.

“I’m gonna die,” he said, after a second. “I can’t handle my demon heart. He says it’s gonna kill me, after a while.”

And he could feel it coming,  could feel his skin burning away, the ache in his body growing stronger, his eyes getting blurrier. It hurt. Dying sucked.

“I’ll come back again, but I don’t know who I’ll be, then.”

“Why are you telling me?” Angel asked, something heavy and unreadable in his brow.

Rin shrugged, but then aborted the movement when it only sent the racketing feeling of nausea up his stomach. He waited for it to pass, before trying to speak again. “I can’t do the last part by myself. Can you help me out?”

“I don’t know why you think I’d be inclined to help  _ you  _ with anything.”

“Ah, don’t worry, it’s a good thing.” He waved a hand, or as much of a wave as he could manage. Rin managed to get his hands up in the air, and the shackles slid down his forearms to expose his wrists. He tried to concentrate, to funnel a little bit of the flames into his wrists, and knew he succeeded when a faint blue glow cast itself across his vision.

“You know these, right?” He asked, as runes written in dark ink lit up around his wrists. “They’re those, uh, anima something.”

“ _ Anima mea captionem, _ ” Angel said, and Rin nodded. His scowl turned confused. “You’re planning to capture yourself?”

Rin nodded, letting his arms fall back to the ground. “Sorta. But not me.”

“...who?”

“It was the other end of the deal,” he said, smiling wryly. “Shiro’s life for mine.”

Dead silence fell over the room, and Angel’s face had become something closer to stunned. Then, to angry, and horrified, and when he turned tail and left the room, Rin was already looking back up at the ceiling. Counting the tiles felt much better than focusing on the feeling of his blood boiling him from the inside-out, but the insistent burning was starting to become worse.

He didn’t have much more time left in control, he knew. He had almost hoped that he could’ve said goodbye to Yukio, and to his dad, and to Shura, but he supposed that this was just how life was. It sucked, and sucked, and sucked, and then it ended.

Somewhere in between a haze of sleep and a fever dream, there was a bright light in his eye, and he blinked awake to see someone holding a light in front of his face. Just beyond them, he could see Shura’s face, looking down at him from above, something sad and angry in her expression. There was a deep set sort of… tiredness in her body language, and he felt sympathy pang harsh and strong in his chest.

“Y’awake, kiddo?” she asked, sounding like she was speaking over a layer of cellophane. His ears were ringing.

“Yeah,” he managed to get out. “M’good.”

She sighed, and as the person with the light backed away, she crouched down next to him, reaching a hand out to feel along his forehead. Her fingers felt like ice, and he leaned into it, stealing what little chill he could before her fingers warmed. Rin could see Angel behind her, arms crossed, and some of those other adults he vaguely recognized from Tottori.

“We need to ask you some questions, Rin,” she said.

As the cold faded, Rin nodded, and leaned back to the ground. He’d give anything in the world for some ice, then, but somehow he doubted that anyone would be willing to give him that.

“-deal ya made?”

“Huh?” He blinked, craning his head back to look at Shura.

“What was the deal ya made?” she repeated. “I need ya to tell me as many details as you can give.”

He tried to pull his consciousness together long enough to string more words together, though the effort had his heart pounding quick and heavy in his ears. “He was gonna… let Shiro live, ‘n I’d give him my body, y’know?”

He’d been given a time limit back then. Rin couldn’t remember it now, but he knew it was soon, and the urgency seized him.

“He’s comin’ soon.” Rin looked up at Shura, trying to tell her what his stupid mouth couldn’t manage to get out. The words he’d been holding in for months, the plans that he’d been making right under Satan’s nose. His Satan’s victory with Iblis and the broken kurikara had blinded him, distracted him, which was the only reason Rin felt safe divulging it now. “He’s gonna get trapped.”

“Trapped? Trapped how, Rin?”

“The seal.” He could hear Angel saying. “He said the seal was meant to capture something other than himself.”

“‘s a net.” Rin nodded, pulling a hand up to tap at his chest. “He’ll come out, ‘n he’ll be stuck.”

“You mean to say that you’ve offered him a body?” Angel’s voice was practically trembling with anger. “A  _ permanent  _ way into Assiah? Execution would be too good of a fate for you!”

“Tha’s the idea,” he mumbled.

Shura’s mouth twisted into a frown. “What idea?”

She still didn’t get it? Rin felt a desperate sort of desperation building up in his chest — he didn’t know how long he had until Satan would be paying attention to him again, and whenever that came, he knew it wouldn’t be long after that his body would be given away.

“He’ll be trapped,” he said, again. “In a dead body.”

Her eyes widened, as did Angel’s, and with that, he let his eyes close, his body slumping against the stone floor. Good. They understood him, then. The last part of his plan would need their help, after all — the whole death part. He was riding on the assurance of that execution.

And then everything would be over. Everything would be okay.

“What kinda-  what kinda stupid-ass idea is that? Rin!” Shura was demanding. Angry, scared.

“A super stupid-ass one,” he agreed, tiredly.

But she reached a hand out to shake his shoulder harshly, startling him into awareness. “Yer givin’ yer life away for some hare brained plan that might not even  _ work?!”  _

“Yes?” Rin didn’t get why she was upset. Maybe his plan might not work, but it was worth a shot, right?

“Yer worth more than that!” Shura snapped, and  _ oh.  _ “God, kid — what the hell!”

Rin couldn’t think of anything to say, to make things better. But everything hurt, and everything burned, and the black spotting in his vision was becoming much harder to resist.

And so, he didn’t.

* * *

“Teach? You up?”

Yukio blinked, looking up from where his hands were holding the sheets of the hospital bed. He could see Shima poking his head through the door of the room, giving a wave and a gentle smile. The other boy was silently asking for permission to come in, and Yukio granted it.

It was between Shima entering the room and sitting down beside the bed that Yukio began to regret it. He was desperate for the company, yes, for any information that anyone could give him, but for a long few seconds, he just… didn’t know what face to put on. The title of ‘sensei’ was one he used to be able to hide behind so easily, but now that the exwires had seen everything underneath — _ now that everyone in the Order had seen what was underneath, _ said the handcuff keeping him tied to the bed’s frame — he didn’t know if there was any point to the persona anymore. 

As Shima took a seat beside him, he felt like the mask was in little pieces now, too small to be pulled back together. All that was left was himself — raw, and afraid, and deeply, deeply torn, and like a wound, all he wanted to do was keep it hidden.

“You feelin’ okay?” Shima seemed to pick up on this, or at least some of it. 

“Better,” he said, and it wasn’t entirely a lie. He couldn’t feel the sting of the gash on his arm anymore, nor the dull ache of the hole in his neck. The painkillers were nice for that much, at least.

“The others are gonna be here soon,” the other boy offered up, an attempt at a neutral conversation. “Bon ‘n Koneko are all tied up in callin’ their families, and I think the girls went with Moriyama to her shop, but we agreed to meet up here.”

“You’re not?” Yukio asked, and at Shima’s confused frown, clarified, “Calling your parents?”

“Not much point in it.” He shrugged, smiling. “I’m safe. Not much more I think they’d wanna know, y’know?”

But Yukio recognized the tension in his shoulders, and decided to let it go. A silence stretched between them then, somewhat awkward, before Shima finally gave out a sigh. He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed and eyes downcast.

“I’m sorry all of this is happenin’ to you guys,” he said, quiet.

Yukio shook his head, looking back down at his hands in turn. “It’s not your fault.”

“It-” Whatever he meant to say next seemed to die in his throat, and he shook his head. Yukio might have had the energy to press him, any other day. “Right. It still sucks to see, though. Shit really hit the fan, huh?”

And he didn’t need to say it, but Yukio knew that much of it was his own fault.  _ I did commit treason,  _ he thought to himself, wryly, as he looked at the solid metal wrapped around his wrist. Guilt felt heavy in his stomach, but indignation burned just as hot beside it. He didn’t want to do what he did, but what choice did he have?

He doubted anyone else would see it his way, though. At the end of the day, he’d chosen to betray the Order, and yet the weight of how  _ useless  _ it had all been in the end was like cinder blocks on his shoulders. 

“Kinda makes you feel like your whole life seemed set up to fuck you over, don’t it?” Shima joked, in a grim sort of way.

The truth of it was enough to have a dry sort of laugh escaping Yukio. “It does, doesn’t it? Working so hard to avoid an outcome that you never could’ve escaped in the first place.”

“Like pissing on a forest fire,” Renzou added.

“That’s disgusting.” Yukio tried to fight down a smile, but could tell he was failing.

Then, there was the sound of knocking at the door, and the two of them looked up at the front of the room in time to see Miwa stepping in, Suguro just behind him. Miwa was balancing two trays of food from the Italy branch’s cafeteria in his arms, while Suguro held two more just behind him. The smaller of the two boys smiled over at him as the door closed, something tender in his eyes.

“Hi, Okumura-sensei,” he said, crossing the room to join them.    


“We brought food.” Suguro held the trays up, before setting one down gently over Yukio’s lap, handing the other to Shima. “You holdin’ up okay?”

“Aw hell yes, you have no idea how starving I am!” Shima cried, eagerly grabbing at the food. Whatever had happened between them just a minute before was gone, replaced by a breezy smile and closed eyes. “It’s been forever since I had Italian!”

“Yeah, you better enjoy it,” Suguro said grumpily, sitting on the edge of the bed. “It was hard as shit gettin’ somethin’ when we don’t speak a lick of Italian.”

“I didn’t think about that,” Yukio confessed. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Suguro asked, through a mouthful of panini.

“We…” He looked back down at his lap, biting at his lip for a second. “We likely wouldn’t have been here in the first place if not for me.”

He didn’t regret his actions — not yet, at least. But he hadn’t considered, at the time, that his students would’ve been affected, too. 

“Maybe so,” Miwa said, slowly, as he poked at his salad with a fork. “But I think I might’ve done the same thing, if I were in your situation.”

“He’s your brother,” Suguro added. “And I’m… kinda glad ya did, to be honest.”

Yukio looked up at him, somewhat curious, despite it all. “Why so?”

Suguro shifted, then, looking a bit more uncomfortable as he pulled his knee up onto the bed. “Well, I was talkin’ to Shima and Neko about it, but I still wanna make up with Okumura, I guess. Things never felt right with how we left it off.”

Oh. Yukio frowned, and wrung his hands in the sheets. “I’m afraid you might not be able to. Or anyone, for that matter.”

That got their attention. Miwa frowned, and spoke first. “What do you mean, sensei?”

“Rin-” He stopped, and sighed.  _ They’re going to find out eventually,  _ he told himself.  _ Better from me.  _ “Rin made… a deal, a while ago. When he tried to save our father’s life, he made a trade.”

Miwa’s eyes widened. Shima, however, only stared resolutely off to the side.

It felt painful to say, but he forced himself to say it aloud. “Rin traded our father’s life, in exchange for giving his body up to Satan.”

You could have heard a pin drop, in the silence that followed. 

While Miwa looked down to the bed, face pale, Suguro muttered a ‘shit’ beneath his breath. He stood all at once, figure drawn tight with tension as he crossed the room like he couldn’t stand to stay still.

“What the hell is  _ wrong  _ with that guy?” Suguro muttered, voice tight with aggravation. “It’s like every time I think I got him figured out, he’s throwin’ more curveballs!”

Yukio wanted to agree, but a vision hit him of Rin, angry and hurt — _ “And how terrible would that be, huh? To know something is going on, and your brother's lying to you about it all?” _

But this was different, wasn’t it? A secret of this magnitude .  But was it much bigger than a secret father? He felt like he was at war with himself, his own hurt versus the barbed wire of  _ ‘you’re not much better, you know.’ _

“That’s…” Miwa seemed like he was at a loss for what to say. “How could he do something like that?”

Shima glanced over, eyes unreadable. “Wouldn’t you have done the same? If you had the chance?”

Yukio hesitated, and knew without really seeing that Suguro and Miwa had done so as well.

Would he have done the same? Would he have given up his body, just to give his father another chance at life? Sacrifice his own, so someone else could live? 

Hadn’t he done so already, in a way? He’d sacrificed his reputation, his professional standing, just to give Rin a chance at another few days of living. Did he really have the room to judge his brother for only doing the same thing?

“It ain’t just that,” Suguro bit out, crossing his arms tightly. “He just makes it so goddamn impossible to get close! Do ya know how frustratin’ it is watchin’ a guy who’s so determined  _ not  _ to be helped?”

“He’s shut us out, too,” Yukio said, hollowly. “Both me and our father.”

The other boy threw his hands up. “See? It’s like he’s just determined to di-”

“Yuki?”

When they looked up to see Shiemi, she was standing in the door, expression drawn tight and arms held around her waist. She looked at him, in particular, and something in her eyes looked akin to grief.

She only held up a ring of keys. “Miss Kirigakure wants to see you, with- with Rin.”

“Did she say why?” He couldn’t help but ask. Dread was pulling at him, growing more intense with the deepening of the crease between her brows.

“You should talk to her,” Shiemi said, quiet, yet insistent. She crossed the room, and it was then that he could see Kamiki and Paku just outside the door. Kamiki stood, rigid, but Paku seemed near to tears, and only closer when she looked at him.

He felt like something had gone very, very wrong.

Shiemi reached down with the keys to undo the handcuff, and Yukio rubbed his freed wrist, trying to push down the anxiety crawling up his throat. He slung his feet over the side of the bed, and stood, as Shiemi stepped back to give him space.

“Kamiki and Paku are staying here,” she murmured, turning to the other boys. “They’ll fill you all in.”

On what exactly, he wanted to ask. But he kept himself quiet, rubbing at his arms to ward off the chill seeping through his thin hospital shirt, and followed behind her. 

The hospital of the Italy branch was quiet, and oddly devoid of people. The thought occurred to him that the exorcists were drawn away in a meeting, and he had a strong feeling that he knew what it might be about. This, however? What Shiemi was leading him to? Confusion ate at him as he followed behind a silent Shiemi, and only grew stronger when the keyed door she led him through brought them to a cold, stone basement.

The twisting hallways were dark, and damp, and when he looked to the adjacent door, he saw Shura standing there. Her eyes were downcast, her brows drawn tight and arms crossed. She looked up, when they got close enough, and something about her tired, weary eyes made him think that he should have just stayed back in the room.

“You can go on back, Moriyama,” Shura said first, turning to the girl. Shiemi only gave a nod before she did so, leaving the two of them alone.

“How is he?” he asked, anxious.

Shura hesitated, and it only made his stomach twist harder. “He’s… over the worst.”

“The worst?”

“Ya don’t want the details,” she said, low, almost silently telling him not to ask. “Trust me.”

He thought of Rin’s skin, peeling with the burns, and the furnace-hot feeling of his skin, and decided to let that train of thought go. Maybe it was best that she didn’t answer him.

“Ya know about the deal?” she asked him, but as he nodded, Yukio knew it was more a rhetorical question than anything. “Ya know his plan, then?”

“Plan?”

Shura took in a breath, before speaking. “He got his hands on the  _ anima mea captionem.  _ When Satan gets to him, he’s gonna trap him, and he… he was plannin’ on dying-”

_ No. _

“-to trap Satan in his body. So when he died, the seal would keep Satan in a body that can’t act.”

“No,” he breathed, aloud, and with it came a feeling of fear and anger so intense that his hair stood on end. Something snapped, and in the next blink, he was pushing past Shura, further into the stone room.

He couldn’t believe it. He didn’t want to believe it. Shura had to be wrong.

She had to be wrong.

The ruffled slump of his brother’s body on the floor was familiar, but the shock of white hair on his head was not. Yukio didn’t even pause, only coming to a halt scant inches away from Rin. His hands were shaking by his side, his heartbeat fast and deafening in his ears. Rin blinked awake, sluggish, and looked up at him, and the damn broke loose.

“Your plan was  _ suicide? _ ” he cried, in a rush of breath and tears and anger. 

Rin’s eyes widened a fraction, and he picked his head up. “It wasn’t-”

“How could you?!” The tears spilled over, and he couldn’t have stopped them even if he wanted to. “Did you think- did you just think you would  _ die,  _ and no one would care? That we’d all be fine, or that- that life would just go on? You’re my  _ brother!” _

His knees gave out, and as soon as he hit the ground, he could feel Rin’s hands at his shoulders. Yukio batted them away, furious and crying at the same time.

“What am I supposed to do without you?” he demanded, through hiccuping sobs. “I- dad, he- I can’t lose you, too, Rin,  _ please.  _ Not like this. _ ” _

But the creeping realization that everything was already happening, already set in stone had a suffocating feeling of hopelessness and despair wrapping tight around his throat. Rin hadalready made his choice, made his decisions — it was months too late. There was nothing he could do to stop it.

And God, did it hurt.

“I’m sorry.” He could hear Rin saying, and could see his brother’s face — defeated, tired — through a blurry haze. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t- I don’t understand-  _ why?" _ Yukio tried to swallow down his tears, to no avail. He didn’t get it. Why was Rin leaving him behind?  _ Alone _ .

Rin’s shoulders slumped, his eyes dark and rimmed with red. “I… All I ever do is screw things up. But I can do this, to protect you and dad.”

“We don’t want this! God, Rin, I don’t want you to die to protect us! I want you to live! It’s not worth it if you’re  _ dead!”  _ He sucked in a breath, and then closed his eyes, for a long few seconds. “...please, tell me there’s a way out of this.”

When Rin spoke, it was quiet and devastating all at once.

“There isn’t.”


	20. a failsafe, a reunion, and a way out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry for the late update.

Shura woke up to cold stone against the back of her head, and a pulsing headache. She fought back the groan, reaching a hand up to pull out the ponytail she’d left her hair in the night before, massaging her scalp with her fingers as she looked about the dungeon, trying to figure out what exactly had awoken her.

It wasn’t necessarily like she wanted to be sleeping in a dungeon, per se, but… with the Grigori breathing down the back of her neck, and the sudden release of Rin’s (stupid, utterly and completely stupid) deal, she didn’t trust him alone. Not by himself, not vulnerable, and certainly not alone with his time running out so soon.

He’d given her a rather cryptic timeline, before his body would no longer be his own.  _ Maybe a couple of hours,  _ he’d murmured, long after Shura had forced Yukio back to his hospital bed.  _ By tomorrow, I think. _

(The resignation in his voice, the tired regret — none of it belonged coming out of the mouth of a boy so young, she thought to herself. Especially not out of someone like Rin.)

Shura strained her ears for the sound of his breathing, almost dreading the thought of hearing the stutter-quick panting from the day before. He’d managed to survive the return of his demon heart, though barely (the vision of his charred corpse was one she never thought she’d be able to forget), and though he seemed fine, now — _ Iblis said dad needed a stronger body _ _ — _ the thought of him not making it through the night was a terrifying anxiety that never seemed to let up.

She was acutely aware of the slipping threads of the boys, of Shiro, falling through her fingers. She’d watched them go, before, but she felt the paralyzing need to grasp tight to them, to keep them close, to keep them safe.

(It was a losing battle, she knew.)

The sound of breathing finally reached her ears, and she breathed out a sigh when it did. Rin’s breaths were calm and steady, and Shura prayed that he was still asleep, and that she was just being paranoid. But, when she craned her neck to look at him, curled in the corner, she saw dark blue eyes looking right back at her.

“It’s time,” he said, voice small and skin pale.

“Shit,” Shura muttered. She hated to have to ask, but knew she needed to. “Ya sure that seal’s gonna hold him tight?”

“Mhm.” Rin nodded, then looked up to her. “You got the, uh, the chain things?’

Right. The other half of the plan. There was no undoing what Rin had already done — the deal, the captionem seals, the execution hanging on the horizon. It had taken a lot of discussion, between herself and the Arc Knights and even Angel himself, before they had reluctantly made the decision to go ahead with Rin’s plan. If Satan was already incoming, and there was no escaping that, then they would just have to work with what they had.

And what they had, was only half of a plan. The  _ captionem _ seal was intended to trap Satan within Rin’s body, but as for what Rin’s body would be free to do afterwards? Escape was near guaranteed if they didn’t have a surefire way to keep him restrained.

The solution was archaic, and more than a little uncomfortable to have to resort to. Even so, she pulled her phone from her pocket, squinting in the harsh light to pull up her text messages. She pulled up her text messages-

_ Dai-baby~!: _ _ See you in the cafeteria? _

She froze, the last conversations with Daichi thrown up across her screen. Her chest felt empty, lungs devoid of air. It was with a shaking finger that she swiped the conversation away (not now not now not now) and pulled up Angel’s contact, trying to swallow down the lump in her throat long enough to send the text.

_ You: _ _ we’re ready. bring lewin? _

A few seconds, and then the buzz of a reply.

_ Baldy: _ _ On the way. _

She let hands drop to her sides, trying to blink away the sudden sting in her eyes. Her mind repeated a constant mantra of  _ not now not now not now _ in a desperate bid to flush everything else out, but it was only the quiet grunt from the ground nearby that drew her from her thoughts.

“Shura,” Rin bit out, strained. “Please, now.”

She swallowed, then tucked her phone into her pocket. “I hear ya, kid, we’re comin’.”

And for a second, it struck her like lightning — the feeling of despair at how utterly  _ unfair  _ it all was. How unfair that Rin was here, that Shiro was out of commission, that Yukio was alone and everything was going to hell before she could fix  _ any  _ of it. More than anything, she wished she had more time.

If someone would just gift her with more time, with a second chance, then she’d… she didn’t know what she would do.  _ Maybe I’d turn my life around, or somethin’ sappy like that,  _ she thought to herself. A rueful, sad little grin pulled at her mouth, as the feeling slipped away like sand. It was pointless to regret things now. It was already too late.

Shura heard distant footsteps, a pair of them. Only sparse seconds later, Angel appeared in the doorway, with Lewin close behind him, grinning as carelessly as ever. He had a bag at his side, and a sense of finality settled in her chest at the sight of it. 

No bond in Assiah would be strong enough to hold back the son of Satan himself, much less a possessed son of Satan — and so, seals it was.

“Awfully grim down here, don’t you think?” Lewin said amiably, as if the Antichrist himself weren’t imminently about to be in their midst. “Couldn’t we do this somewhere more, I don’t know, peppy?”

“Shura!” Rin called, sharper. Both Angel and Lewin turned to look at him, and while Lewin’s grin grew sharper, Angel’s face dimmed. She didn’t have time to figure out what was on his mind, and instead turned to cross the room to where Rin laid in the corner. Shura crouched down beside him, reaching a hand out to half-heartedly run through his hair.

“We’re ready,” she said, as reassuring as she possibly could. “You good to go?”

He nodded, and when he sat up, it was in a trembling, unsteady sort of way. She held her other hand out to steady him, and yet when she caught sight of his eyes, she nearly faltered.

_ A fifteen year old boy, facing off against the Devil himself. _

What a horrible, horrible twist of fate.

Angel and Lewin, to their credit, waited patiently while she helped Rin up to sitting, and unbuttoned his uniform shirt to reveal the stark, ugly contract mark on his chest. Shura forced herself not to look at it, instead reaching a hand back to Lewin. She heard the button of his bag, and then the rustling of brushes, before a small, cold bottle and a brush were placed in her hand.

The chains of his shackles clanked together as he handed his arm out, and Shura took it, steadying it on her knee. Angel settled down by her side, and Lewin at the other. The taller man had a knife in hand, a sterile silver one, and lifted it up to his fingertip, pricking his skin just enough to draw blood forth. He wiped the knife off, and then handed it to Lewin for him to do the same, as Shura pulled off the cap to the bottle of ink in her hand.

From there, it was simple, almost easy. A few drops of blood from the three of them, a chant murmured in tandem, and the ink glowed faintly with green. The glow faded, and she reached a brush down, wetting it with ink before beginning her task.

Minutes passed in silence, one none of them dared to break, as she drew swooping lines over Rin’s skin, each one with purpose and strength. The seal was devastating in its simplicity — at their command, and drawing on their power, all they would have to do was repeat the chant to violently, and painfully subdue him. It was created to leave no physical mark, only to set the nerves alight with agony until they ceased the chant.

If they couldn’t restrain him physically, then this was their only option in strength and effectiveness. It made her skin crawl.

In what felt like no time at all, and yet all the time in the world, she finished the last of the seal, leaving Rin in what practically looked like a shirt of ink. Normally, this was a seal applied to a bracelet, or an amulet, or another small piece of jewelry to mitigate its effects and reach.

(And that was how she knew that there wouldn’t be a second of the seal’s activation that wouldn’t feel like agony.)

A final murmur of the chant, and the ink glowed once more, fading into his skin as Rin bit down at a noise. A moment of weakness hit her, and she dropped the brush to the ground, instead twisting her palm over to hold his hand in hers. She’d give anything to keep this from happening, but as it was, she knew this was what little she could offer.

As Lewin and Angel stood, she hesitated for just a second, as Rin’s grip on her hand turned tight.

“If I don’t get a chance out again,” he started, eyes wide and vulnerable. “Can you tell my dad ‘n Yukio that I love ‘em? And I’m sorry?”

_ Tell them yourself!  _ Shura wanted to say — wanted to ruffle his hair and grin and laugh.

“Sure thing, kiddo,” she said, instead. “Hang tight, okay?”

He nodded, and she tried to smile, for his sake, but she knew without looking that it had fallen flat. Shura didn’t let the moment linger, only pulled herself up to her knees — but before she left, she paused. Instead, she leaned down, and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

And before she could think on it anymore, she did stand, and crossed the room to stand with Lewin and Angel.

“You ever think you’d be meeting Satan so soon?” Lewin asked in a conspiratorial whisper.

“Under circumstances like these?” Angel scoffed, though there was no amusement behind it. “Hardly. I’d prefer something… less comparable to the murder of a child.”

Both she and Lewin looked to him, shocked. But before either of them could question him, there was something like a shifting in the air. Like everything had suddenly become supercharged, the moment before the crackling strike of lightning.

To Shura, it felt like standing in a gym, watching Rin just before he finally managed to light his first candle. The sense of deja vu was not one she wanted, nor a realization she wanted to have. But the feeling only intensified this time, not like it had faded before. When she looked over to where they’d left Rin, she could see nothing but a sinister, blue glow.

**“Ha! Christ above, do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this?”**

His voice was like nails on a chalkboard, a disgusting imitation of Rin’s own. Whatever gentleness she’d felt for Rin was gone, replaced only by disgust and hatred for the creature before them.

“Don’t get used to it, asshole,” she warned.

**“What? Do you think you’re going to banish me?”** He snickered, shifting lazily across the stone.  **“Pull out your little bibles and send me away? I wouldn’ta wasted my time, if it was that easy!”**

“Nope!” Lewin chirped, ever casual even in the face of evil incarnate. “In fact, I think you’re gonna be hanging out here for a good long while!”

Satan paused, then huffed out a laugh.  **“Oh? You have a plan, then? I should’ve known that idiot kid of mine was going to screw things up, you never can trust the youth these days. So reckless! Throwing themselves headlong into excitement, danger, demonic deals** **—** **oh, you want to hear about that, don’t you?”**

_ No,  _ she wanted to say.  _ I do not. _

**“I’ve never met a human so stupid! So desperate for that stupid priest that he got suckered right where I wanted him! Ha! Really makes those other kids of mine look like idiots too, huh?”**

“He’s trying to egg you on,” Angel muttered, looking away and to the back wall.

“Well, it worked,” Shura muttered, narrowing her eyes when she raised her voice. “He couldn’ta been that stupid if he got you trapped in here, you stupid son of a bitch.”

The look on Satan’s face, just before she activated the seal, made it all worth it.

(And the screams, as well.)

* * *

It was late at night when Ryuji managed to sneak out, throwing a cautious eye back at Shima and Konekomaru’s sleeping forms as he did so. He eased the door closed, holding his breath for any movement from inside the room, but when none came, he felt safe. He hadn’t been able to get away from them, or the other exwires the entire day. Konekomaru in particular had stayed glued to his side, but now, in the dead of night, he was finally alone.

And with that, he had one destination in mind.

He passed through the unfamiliar halls of the Vatican, keeping his breathing quiet and his footsteps quieter. Every few seconds or so, he looked about the hallways, trying his damndest to be sure that he wouldn’t be seen. It wasn’t exactly against any rules to be out, per se, but he knew that he’d be given an earful if he got caught out and about — especially when his goal was to figure out where Okumura had been hidden.

Ryuji knew even before he made his plan that Okumura was going to be difficult to find. With the deal (and God, didn’t that make his skin crawl just to remember), and everything that had happened recently, he knew Okumura was only going to be held in the most secure cell. That was going to make it harder to find, but at the same time, easier. It was easier to identify stronger holdings than every day ones, after all.

That, and he’d spied Angel and Lightning just earlier that day. Just a glimpse, really, but it had been enough. He’d seen them leave through a door in one of the side hallways just to the left of the cafeterias, one small enough to easily be looked over, and he’d just known deep down that they were going to wherever Miss Kirigakure and Okumura were.

So, Ryuji followed the path he remembered to the cafeteria, watching vigilantly for any guards or passerbys. Thankfully, he’d overshot how late he meant to stay up, and a quick look at his phone let him know that it was just an hour or so past midnight. There was sure to be no one awake at a time like this.

Or, so he told himself, anxiously.

He found the hallway easily enough, and from there, it was just a matter of figuring out what door they’d gone down. He didn’t have any particularly good investigating skills, he knew, but he did remember that Lightning had a… distinct scent, to be sure. In fact, Ryuji could catch a hint of it in that hallway.

_ Does that dude ever shower?  _ he thought to himself, wrinkling his nose. Just the idea of how absolutely dirty Lightning’s clothes had to be to reek that badly had him itching to throw the man’s entire wardrobe into the wash. 

But this time, however, it seemed to come in handy, as disgusting as it was. Ryuji could catch the scent more potently through a door just by a bust of some old priest, one that he didn’t care to recognize in favor of reaching out to test the doorknob.  _ Unlocked.  _ He was starting to wonder if maybe he was too lucky.

Even so, the door led down to exactly the kind of stone corridor that he expected, complete with dim lanterns and all. The air was cold, and cut right through his t-shirt, leaving goosebumps across his skin as he closed the door behind him. His footsteps, no matter how silent he tried to keep them, echoed lightly down the stairs, and he reasoned that he was far enough now that maybe he could just annoy his way into finding Okumura, if he got caught.

The sense of profound emptiness had his hair standing on end, and he tried to rub some warmth back into his arms as he wandered his way through the hallways. Empty cells passed beside him, coupled with rusted bars, mold, and just about everything Ryuji expected from a creepy, abandoned jail beneath the Vatican.

Eventually, he came past a door that felt different, somehow. Then he looked closer, and realized that there were hand prints worn into the dust of the door.

“Looking for something?”

Ryuji gasped aloud for the first time in his life, heart jumping up into his throat as his head jerked to look at the voice.

“Lightning?” he managed to get out, through the pounding of his heartbeat in his chest. “Jesus, ya scared the shit outta me!”

“Sorry!” Lightning singsonged, not looking the least bit apologetic. The glint of his eyes behind his hair was sharp. “Say, awful late for a kid to be down here, huh? Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

Ryuji shifted, holding his arms tighter to his chest. He knew this was coming- the part where he’d have to explain himself. “I, uh… I wanted to… see Okumura.”

_ Great. How eloquent of you, dumbass. _

“Is that so?” Lightning asked, reaching a hand up to hold his chin. Ryuji braced himself to be rejected, and promptly ratted out to every adult in the nearby area. “...hmm, that’s alright, I guess.”

He blinked.

“What? Really?!”

Lightning frowned. “Hey, hey, voices down, remember? And don’t get too excited, I’m not gonna defend you if you get caught, y’know!”

“Still! Thank you.” Ryuji insisted — his mother had raised him right, after all. Even with the elation that had him smiling, he couldn’t ignore the question pulling at his chest. “Why, though?”

“Mmh, is it really that complicated?” The man stretched his arms high above his head, grunting as he stepped over to lean against the wall. “I just think life’s more fun when you break as many rules as you follow, don’t you think?”

Ryuji couldn’t have disagreed more, but considering Lightning was giving him an open chance to go see Okumura, he wisely kept his mouth shut. Instead, he looked back at the door, and reached a hand down to the handle.

And then hesitated.

“What’s wrong?” Lightning asked him, after a few seconds.

“I-” He stopped, and frowned. Should he tell Lightning? …Did he really have anything to lose by doing so? “I, well, I wanna see him, I do, but… does he want to see me?”

“Well, I can imagine he’s hardly turning down company.” Lightning snickered. “Nobody wants to be alone when they’re dying.”

The weight of his words settled deep in his chest, and the reality of them hit even harder. He swallowed down his nerves and pulled the door open then, stepping into a stone room illuminated only by the dim glow of another lantern.

“Okumura?” Ryuji called, squinting in the dark.

**“I’m afraid he’s out, at the moment.”** The grumbling voice that filled the room made his blood run cold.  **“Check back again later!”**

“You’re… you’re Satan,” Ryuji realized aloud. 

**“Right, indeed! The one and only! What, you want an autograph or something?”**

For a second, rage flared so violently in his chest that it burned to swallow down. He remembered his temple, Konekomaru’s parents, the monks- fifteen years of suffering, and the demon who had caused it all was right in front of him. 

He didn’t have words strong enough to describe how he felt.

And so he didn’t. Ryuji stood, silent, and forced himself not to react as the demon possessing his friend’s body cocked its head to the side.

**“What, nothing? No yelling? No shouting? No loved ones to avenge?”**

_ Quite a few,  _ Ryuji considered saying, but kept his mouth shut.

Satan only groaned, leaning his head against the wall.  **“I swear, you humans are no fun at all. I’m sure there’s gotta be** **_someone_ ** **of yours that I murdered. A dad? A mom? A friend? Lover? Nah, you’re too young for lovers.”**

His eye twitched. He stayed quiet.

**“Ugh! Fine! You wanna talk to the kid so bad, have at it! Not like I can go anywhere.”**

And on that cryptic note, Okumura’s body slumped against the wall, limply. Ryuji startled, eyes wide as he dived forward to catch the other boy before he could hit the ground. Okumura’s shoulders were thin beneath his hands, and he felt like nothing when Ryuji settled him upright.

Sure, the guy had always been slim, but between the pallor of his skin and the bags beneath his eyes… it had his nerves pulling tight.

Then, Okumura grunted, and his eyelids fluttered. Thankfully, when his eyes opened, they were a dark, soft blue, and not the electric cyan they had been before.

“Suguro?” he asked, weakly.

“Yeah, man, I’m here. You… you doing okay?”

As soon as the question was out, Ryuji was kicking himself for it. Of course Okumura wasn’t okay — he looked like death, and wasn’t far off! But the other boy only let out a dry chuckle, rubbing at his eyes. “If okay means regretting every life decision I’ve ever made, both physically and emotionally, then yeah. I’m doin’ great.”

At that, Ryuji couldn’t help the smile that twisted at his lips, if only for Okumura’s sake. But he was able to hold himself on his own, so Ryuji leaned back, sitting on the stone floor in front of him. 

He’d been planning this for an hour now, and this conversation for days, but now that he was sitting in front of Okumura, he didn’t actually know what to say. The other boy seemed the same, as well, staring off to the side with an unreadable look on his face.

But Okumura was the first to speak, and when he did, it was quiet. “I’m sorry. About all of this.”

“It’s…” Ryuji sighed, and leaned back a bit. “I’ve been thinkin’ a lot, and honestly… I can’t say I wouldn’ta done the same, if I were you. I think I was bein’ kinda one-sided about things for a while. I wasn’t really thinkin’ about you as much as I shoulda.”

“You’re not mad at me?” Okumura asked, eyes wide. 

“I think we’re kinda past that now.” He snickered. “Blown past angry and straight into… I dunno. Wonderin’ if maybe givin’ up is the right thing to do.”

Ryuji’s smile had already fallen flat, and Okumura’s expression looked a complicated mix of hurt and yet resigned.

“I guess I haven’t really been an easy guy to be friends with, huh?” he asked, a little ruefully.

Ryuji snorted. “That’s puttin’ it lightly.”

Quiet stretched between them, as Ryuji tried to gather his thoughts into something presentable.

“...for a while there, I was thinkin’ that you really didn’t want us around. I thought if I just kept at it, then everythin’ would be fine, but… man, Okumura, you really didn’t make anythin’ easy.”

“I know,” he murmured, voice thick with regret. “For what it’s worth, I did- I did want to stay with you guys, but it felt selfish, y’know? Wanting to be friends, knowing it might hurt you all. I thought it was better to stay away.”

“Was that before or after you made a suicide pact with the devil?” Ryuji asked, raising a questioning eyebrow. Okumura gave another humorless laugh. “At this point, I’m not thinkin’ you’ve got a very good judgment on anythin’.”

“Now, the hell did you get that from?”

They both chuckled then, because in a way, laughing about the situation seemed a lot easier than admitting the reality of it. 

After a minute, Okumura spoke again. “Y’know, I don’t really… think there’s a way I’m gettin’ out of this, but… I’m glad that we’re cool, in the end.”

Ryuji could feel his smile slipping, but in a split second decision, he held onto it. He reached over and grasped the other boy’s shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze in an attempt to fight down the dread building up in his stomach.

He wasn’t ready to think about losing Okumura, not now, not before things could get better. 

And so, once again, he didn’t.

* * *

The sight of Shura entering his room was one that gave Yukio a vague feeling of deja vu, and even stronger, nervousness. He leaned up from the bed as she gave him a wave and a soft smile, unable to keep back the question he’d been dying to ask.

“How is he?” Yukio asked, before Shura had even seated herself beside the bed.

She hesitated as she did so, lips pursing. “He’s… he’s doin’ okay. Suguro managed to sneak his way down there to see him, just last night.”

Were it any other time, Yukio might’ve laughed. “I’m not surprised about that at all.”

It was a little relieving, in a morbid sort of way, to know that Rin wasn’t alone. He never would’ve left his brother’s side if Shura hadn’t dragged him away and threatened to not let him see Rin again. It was mostly facetious, but he wasn’t willing to push it. Not this time.

“Kid says that Satan isn’t takin’ control all the time,” she continued. “He’s gettin’ some time out.”

Yukio nodded, and leaned back against the headboard again. He couldn’t find it in him to continue the conversation, and nor could Shura, so they sat in silence for a long moment together. There were plenty of things he could have said, and plenty of questions he wanted to ask, but they seemed to pale in comparison to the stress winding his nerves tight. 

“...is there really no way we can get him out?” he found himself asking, trying to fight back the part of him that whispered how stupid it was to even ask, how childish it was to keep looking for hope where there wasn’t any.

Shura’s responding sigh only seemed to confirm that, her shoulders laid low. “Not that I know of. I’m sure there’s gotta be somethin’, but it ain’t exactly like anyone’s jumpin’ to save him, y’know?”

Yukio looked down to his lap, twisting the sheets between his fingers.

It wasn’t fair. It burned like acid — none of this was fair. Just because of who they’d been born to, nobody was going to try to help Rin from a fate worse than death. He felt strongly like hitting something, but as his fist clenched tight, he felt another hand unwrap his fingers from their death grip. He looked up to see Shura giving him a chiding look.

“Hey, don’t start rippin’ up their sheets,” she admonished, but there was no real heat behind it. She let go of his hand, and Yukio laid it back in his lap. “No use tearin’ yourself up over a done deal. Just… enjoy the time ya got left, sprat.”

There was a kind of weight in her words, one that had him faltering.

“I’m sorry about Miss Inoue,” he said, before he could stop himself.

She blinked at him, surprised, and Yukio briefly considered just sewing his lips shut. But then something in her expression loosened, and her eyes grew dark.

“Thank you,” Shura said, and though she visibly hesitated on her next words, she spoke them anyway. “It sucks. A lot.”

It was brief, hardly even a sentence at all, but Yukio realized with wide eyes that it was the first time she’d ever opened up to him about… well, anything. She looked a bit uncomfortable about it, eyes cast down to the floor and arms wrapped tight around her waist, but she didn’t take it back, or leave.

He didn’t know what to do, really, and so he just sat, patiently waiting for her to continue. And after a minute, she did.

“Kinda takes somethin’ like that to make ya realize yer livin’ yer whole life wrong, y’know?” Shura gave him a rueful little smile. “And that ya haven’t been appreciatin’ things near as much as ya shoulda.”

That time, his silence was one of shock — and deep down, something like hope.

“I shoulda been there for you kids. Maybe if I had been, then…” She trailed off, expression pinched tight with discomfort and regret. “I see that now. I screwed up and dropped the ball, and I’m sorry, and I swear to you and yer brother — it won’t happen again. I’m with you, as long as y’all will have me.”

He blinked, mouth opening and closing uselessly. Whatever words he had before had died in his throat, but when his eyes started to sting again, it wasn’t from tears of a sad sort. It felt as if, ever since she had left them, there had always been something  _ missing,  _ something not right, but now? The hole felt sealed over; the loneliness, less crushing; and the hold on his throat, less suffocating.

It was enough to bring the words back to him, simple as they were. “Thank you.”

Shura chuckled. “No need for thanks, I’m just finally doin’ the right thing.”

He nodded, but when he opened his mouth to speak again, he hesitated for a second before managing to get it out.

“...do you think there’s a way to get Rin out of this?”

Her eyebrows furrowed a bit, and though he knew the answer she was likely going to give, he didn’t want to let go of that hope just yet. Surely if Shura had come back, then he could be selfish enough to ask for his brother, too? 

“Yukio, I-”

_ “Guten abend, my young friends~!” _

The sound of a balloon popping only barely preceded the explosion of pink smoke across the room, and before Yukio could stop himself, he was breathing in the smog. Immediately, his chest seized, and he heaved out a cough with a feeble attempt at swiping some of the smoke away. Mephisto grinned at the two of them from his perch atop his disgustingly gaudy office chair, though Yukio could barely see him through the tears in his eyes, lungs constricted tight.

“Hey, asshole! Ya  _ know _ the kid just got out of the hospital for his lungs a few days ago, what gives?” Shura snapped, one hand at his back and another swiping the smoke away from his mouth.

“Oh, my sincerest apologies!” Mephisto crooned, though the look on his face was far from apologetic. 

With a snap of his fingers, the smoke disappeared, though the cleaner air of the room did little to ease the fierce burning in his chest. Yukio scowled up at the demon king, though he knew it was ruined by the wheezing coughs he was trying his damndest to fight down (and failing).

“Whaddya want?” 

“Well~” Mephisto drawled, his umbrella swinging idly in his hand. “I heard that our dear youngest brother had gotten himself into quite the predicament, and I came to offer my services.”

Yukio bit out another cough, then narrowed his eyes at the demon king. “Offer your services?”

“I doubt it’s anything you’d want,” Shura muttered.

“How cruel! I offer my help in my little brother’s greatest time of need, and I’m met with derision?” Mephisto laid a hand over his chest dramatically, eyes wide. “Then perhaps I had best rescind my offer, since it’s so clearly unwanted.”

At that, Yukio hesitated. “...can you really help him?”

The demon king raised an eyebrow. “Human propensity for forgetting the status and power of those who they’ve grown accustomed to the presence of will never cease to astound me. Is it truly so easy to forget that I rank second in Gehenna’s hierarchy?”

“Don’t get yer panties in a twist, drama queen.” Shura let Yukio go to rest back in her chair, crossing her arms once more. “This is Satan we’re talkin’ about here. The guy’s a nutjob, but he still ain’t someone we’ve been led to believe we can compete with.”

“And you’re correct;  _ you  _ certainly can’t trifle with him,” Mephisto said dryly. “But given my rank, I have far more resources than your kind could even dream of.”

“How long have you been hidin’ these so-called ‘resources’?!”

“Wait,” Yukio cut in, eyes widening. “Do you really mean it? You can do something to help?”

Mephisto chuckled. “I can do far more than that, my dear younger brother. I can fix little Rin’s problem almost entirely.”

“Bullshit. There’s nothin’ in our history of exorcism that could get rid of a captionem seal, much less a deal with Satan himself.” Shura scowled. “Don’t go throwin’ these kids on wild goose chases.”

“Your history isn’t quite as long as long as you believe it is, my dear. There were many civilizations before your own.”

“And so what if this secret method of yours works?” she countered. “Then what’ll it cost, huh? Somethin’ like that’s gotta cost someone more than it’s worth.”

“What is the cost, then?” Yukio asked, frowning.

However, Mephisto only gave them a wink and a cheeky grin that promised nothing but aggravation and unanswered questions.

“That, my friends, is for me to know, and Rin to find out!”


	21. a conversation, a mistake, and the plea of a father

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah here we go, the second to last chapter! The end is so close, I'm so excited to share it all with you. The last chapter will be a shorter chapter, and I'm contemplating posting it on wednesday because of that. Either way, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Yukio sucked in a deep breath, trying to calm his pounding heart as he looked at the sliding door before him. His father was just on the other side, he knew, and he really shouldn't have been so nervous. It was just his dad. There was nothing to be nervous about.

Except, well… he would have to explain everything that had happened so far, assuming that Dragulesc (who he’d been told was Shiro’s personal doctor) hadn’t already, and the thought of that task was utterly daunting. He hadn’t questioned his choice to run away with Rin near as much as he did right then, knowing he’d have to tell Shiro why.

And even if that went well, there was the question of Rin’s deal, and his suicide mission, and suddenly he was wishing that he had dragged Shura along with him, after all.

But, well, there was no backing out now. He was already there, his father was expecting him, and all he had to do was suck it up and get it over with. He tried to internalize that, as he reached out and slid the door open, eyes peeking up from the floor to look into the room.

Shiro was perched lazily in bed, one leg drawn up and arm draped over it with a cigarette between his fingers. There were bruises set deep beneath his eyes, and a type of pallor to his skin that Yukio had never seen before. He looked tired, and slimmer, and the number of wires and tubes hooked into his arms and beneath the sheets were not reassuring in the least.

Even so, the bells and whistles of the hospital room seemed to fade away as Shiro took a long drag of his cigarette. It was a familiar sight, though Yukio knew his father hadn’t smoked since before he was born. He had a faint feeling why Shiro would’ve picked it up again, he thought wryly to himself, as the man looked up at him, a soft smile on his face.

“Hey, kiddo,” he greeted. For a second, everything felt so normal and mundane that Yukio felt his breath escape him. “How you holdin’ up?”

Reality came trickling in, as it always did, and Yukio forced his legs to move. He crossed the room but when he turned towards the chair, Shiro made a noise, then patted the bed next to him. The invitation was too obvious to pretend like he hadn’t seen it, so he sat down opposite his father, trying to dispel the tight knot of anxiety in his stomach.

“So?” Shiro prompted, and Yukio realized then that he had never answered his question.

“I’m… doing alright,” he managed to say, putting on a smile that he didn’t really feel. Shiro would easily be able to sniff out a lie, so he kept his statement neutral — not quite true, but not quite wrong, either. 

But the smile that Shiro was giving him made it obvious that he hadn’t bought it. “C’mon, I’m not that old. What’s going on with you?”

“I-” Yukio stopped as a feeling of frustration seized him. “Can’t we talk about normal things?”

He regretted his words as soon as they were out, and shut his mouth with a click, looking back down at his lap. Great. His father was in the hospital, still visibly sick, and there Yukio was, being childish when he should’ve been supportive and put-together. With Shiro just before him, he felt almost like he was being looked at through a magnifying glass, and all he could think of was the ugly shards and shattered glass he could feel in his chest.

“What’s going on, Yukio?” Shiro asked him, again, but something seemed heavier in his tone. Yukio didn’t want to look up to see the disappointment he knew was bound to be written across his father’s expression.

“It’s nothing,” he said, dismissive. “There are more important things.”

Shiro sighed, moving to tap some of the ashes off of the end of his cigarette. He was quiet for a moment, and Yukio prepared himself for the scolding. “You know, you could really stand to be more childish, kiddo.”

Yukio looked up, bewildered. “ _ More  _ childish? Dad, Rin is dying and I-”

“I know,” Shiro said, calmly. He gave another tap of his cigarette, but didn’t bring it up to his mouth.

“Then-” His voice wavered, and Yukio’s hands fisted on his lap. So, his father knew. “Then, haven’t I been childish enough?”

Nobody would say it, but he knew he had damaged his reputation, almost irreparably. He may have saved face with Shura, but the way the other exorcists looked at him now — like he couldn’t be trusted, like he was a wild card that no one wanted around, like he was worse than a failure. He’d become dangerous. Even his students had lost faith in him, and he couldn’t find it anywhere in himself to blame them.

Yukio had single handedly ruined his name, somehow even more than his heritage had. He didn’t know how Shiro could look at that and feel any less of the mortification and shame that he himself did.

“If there’s one thing being cooped up in a hospital room is good for, it’s the time you get to think and reflect,” Shiro started, leaning back against the headboard. “And I’ve been thinkin’ a lot about you, and your brother. Specifically, you, and how I’ve been raisin’ you. I think maybe I had you grow up too fast.”

Yukio blinked, whatever thought he had been holding onto before disappearing. Grow up too fast? How could that be?

“And Rin didn’t grow up enough, huh?” he asked, laughing weakly. He could understand that- another comparison between himself and Rin.

“No, not Rin. Just you,” Shiro clarified, and Yukio swallowed, harshly. “Seven is too early for anyone to be trainin’.”

Yukio shook his head, frowning. “I turned out fine.”

“Did you?” His father raised an eyebrow, one that seemed to pierce through any arguments that Yukio could’ve thought to make. “It’s okay to admit that you’re struggling, or hurtin’. I should’ve taught you that better.”

“You taught me just fine!” he protested. “It’s not your fault I’m-”

- _ like this,  _ a dark, bitter part of him whispered. And it was right. It was Yukio’s own fault that he’d ended up like this, like a failure.

“I didn’t.” Shiro set the last embers of his cigarette into the tray, focusing his full attention on Yukio. “I didn’t raise you well at all. You don’t have to lie to me, kiddo. I can see where I went wrong with you because I see it in myself.”

Yukio found himself speechless once again, looking up at his father with wide eyes. It didn’t make sense to him. What did Shiro mean, ‘see it in myself’? They were nothing alike, not for Yukio’s lack of trying. Shiro was always the respectable leader, the calm and cool and suave paladin, and Yukio was… well, he was everything wrong. 

“I grew up with…” Shiro trailed off, grimacing, but continued on anyways. “I grew up with orphans, in a section of True Cross called the Asylum. I trained you young because I was trained young, and I- well, I never saw anythin’ wrong with it until now.” He reached a gentle hand out to squeeze Yukio’s shoulder, something sad in his smile. “It’s a little bit too late for me, but I can still help you.”

“Is there any point?” Yukio found himself asking, tentative and withdrawn all at once. Things felt hopeless, these days more than ever. “If you and Rin are…”

The end of his sentence hung unspoken in the air, but Shiro’s smile only widened. “Hey now, don’t get that look on your face. I heard Mephisto found him a way out, eh?”

“It’s not a good one,” he said, quietly, and looked back down to the sheets. “He- did anyone tell you about it?”

Shiro pulled his hand back, instead reaching it up to hold his chin. “No, nobody did. What is it?”

Yukio hesitated a bit, but forced himself to get it out. “He wants… he wants to do a sort of exorcism, of sorts. But he says that since Rin is part demon, then he actually exists in two halves; his demon half, and his human half. The exorcism is supposed to get rid of all demonic traces, and Rin’s demon half is going to get dragged in as well. Mephisto says he might not live through it.”

“Is that so?” His father’s brows furrowed. “I never heard of an exorcism like that.”

“Shura thought the same and he said, ‘Why would demons want humans to know about a technique like that?’”

Shiro breathed a huff of laughter out of his nose. “Now that sounds like him. What did Rin say?”

“I don’t know yet,” Yukio said, pulling the fabric of his pants up between his fingers. “Shura is going to tell him. Mephisto said he needed to prepare.”

Shiro nodded, but didn’t say anything more. 

At that, Yukio frowned. “Are you really okay with him doing this?”

His father looked at him, then back to the back wall of the room. “Of course not. You two are my boys, but… this hole that Rin’s dug himself into, there aren’t many options. One: he doesn’t do the ritual, and he’ll be killed for housing Satan. Two: he does do the ritual, and dies. Three: he does do the ritual, lives, and they kill him anyways. Four: he does the ritual, lives, and they decide to cut him a break. I’m thinkin’ that the off chance of him living is about all we have to hold on to.”

“I guess so,” Yukio conceded, though unwillingly. “I don’t trust Mephisto.”

“Neither do I, kiddo. That jackass always has somethin’ up his sleeve, and I doubt he’s just doing this for Rin.” Shiro sighed. “He’s definitely getting something out of this.”

  
“Is there really no way we can get around this?”

“Not that I know of.” The look in his eyes was a dark one, one that Yukio knew he didn’t want to know the history behind. “If Mephisto wants somethin’, he knows how to get it, whether we’re on board or not.”

Just as Yukio went to agree, he felt his phone buzzing in his back pocket and withdrew it. On his lockscreen, there was a notification from Shura, a text that read,  _ ‘Almost time’.  _ Simple, and yet the two words alone set that anxious curl back to his stomach. She must have been done explaining then, and Rin must have agreed to it all.

_ Of course he did,  _ Yukio couldn’t help but think. Rin’s commitment to his suicide mission still lingered heavily in his heart.

“What was that?” Shiro asked, peering down at his phone.

“Shura.” Yukio put his phone back into his pocket, mouth curling unhappily. “She says things are almost ready.”

He nodded at that, and then turned to the nurse paging button, which let out a faint buzz when he clicked it. 

Yukio frowned, confused. “What are you doing?”

“I need a nurse to get me out of all of this so I can go with you,” Shiro said, as if Yukio were the silly one for asking. He looked entirely too nonchalant about leaving the hospital for someone so sickly, and though Yukio knew he was being a hypocrite, he immediately went to protest his father leaving.

“You’re still wounded!”

“I’m not gonna leave my boys alone to deal with this,” Shiro countered, giving him a look. “I’d hardly be much of a father, in that case.”

“But still, we can- we can bring him to you!” He knew it was a weak argument, and the raised eyebrow that his father gave him was only confirmation.

No, Shiro was already dead set on going down to see Rin, and Yukio knew there was little he could do to stop him.

* * *

“Rin, you up?”

He looked from the stone floor at the call of his name, to see Shura standing before him, a terse expression on her face. Rin nodded, before twisting his head back to crack the kinks out of his neck. Unsurprisingly, sleeping upright in a cell tended to be incredibly uncomfortable, and he tried to stretch the tension out of his back as Shura kept talking.

“The kids are here to see you,” she said, softly.

At that, Rin hesitated, looking back up to her. “...do they all know?”

Shura nodded. “Yukio tells me that he told ‘em all, and they wanna see you anyways.”

He nodded, though reluctantly, and felt nervousness start to curl up as Shura turned away from his corner and towards the door of the room. Rin knew that Ryuji was — well, not okay with it all, but at least not hysterical. He had no idea how the others would react. He counted himself lucky that Satan had surrendered the body over for the day (with the exception of his demonic, enraged howling whenever Rin tried to sleep), so they wouldn’t have to worry about that, but…

_ “Did you think you would die, and no one would care?!” _

If they knew everything, then they probably knew his previous plan, too. Maybe it was selfish of him, but the thought of having to weather another emotional lecture made him wish that Yukio really had managed to succeed in spiriting them both away. He’d just intended to… well, hide things until it was too late for anyone to act, but now everyone knew, and he wasn’t dying fast enough to avoid their judgement.

In that case, he wasn’t selfish. No, he was just a coward, who couldn’t bear to weather the consequences of his actions.

(And those weren’t entirely his own words, of course. He had a particular deadbeat dad to thank for that, and for the onslaught of insults and taunts for every one of Rin’s flaws and insecurities. Satan was nothing if not creative, that was for sure.)

The sound of the door opening reached him, and soon after, soft voices speaking amongst each other. They quieted as they grew closer, and Rin plastered on a smile as the familiar sight of the other exwires came into view. He was acutely aware of how, well,  _ disheveled  _ he looked, and hoped it wouldn’t be too offputting. 

“Hey guys,” he greeted, trying to ignore the jangling of the chains as he waved.

But, as the group seemed to stare at him, wide-eyed and stunned, he got the feeling that his efforts hadn’t been effective. At all. Suguro gave him a sympathetic look from the back of the group, but just as the silence began to grow uncomfortable, he could hear Shima’s aborted snicker from behind his hand.

“Trust a guy like Okumura to act like nothing’s wrong!” Shima giggled, breaking the tension.

“Well, hey, I don’t always wanna think about impending death and shit!” Rin protested, huffing as he leaned back against the wall. 

“Right, right.” Shima grinned, squatting down to be at eye level with him. “How are you holding up? Got any hot ladies taking care of you?”

He rolled his eyes. “What, were you expecting someone?”

Made sense that a guy like Shima would be an awful flirt even in something like this. Kamiki seemed to share his sentiment as she let out a judgmental snort. 

“I shouldn’t be surprised that someone like him is resorting to literal prisons for new victims.” she said, turning her nose up. “Everywhere else is tired of him, I suppose.”

“That’s too cruel!”

“Anyways!” Kamiki cut him off pointedly, instead looking to Rin. “You never answered the question.”

“What, about hot ladies?” he asked, confused.

She scowled, crossing her arms. “No, idiot! About how you’re doing!”

“Have they been treatin’ you okay?” Suguro gave him a hard look, like he was expecting to be given someone to harass. 

Rin couldn’t help the smile, though he might’ve been exasperated at any other time. It was nice in a way, to have at least one friend to lean on in the potential end of his life. Suguro was doing a solid job of acting like nothing had ever happened between them, and once he got past the morbidity of it all, he was grateful for it.

“Yeah, I’m doin’ okay.” Rin murmured, looking down to his wrists. “Not great, but y’know. Not terrible.”

He got food when he needed it, and water, and the bathroom whenever Shura was there to take him. Sure, it was a little cold down there, and more than a little eerie at night, but it really wasn’t that bad, when he thought about it. At least he was alive, and at least he could have visitors, when Shura was there to watch them. 

He was expecting a swift execution, so he supposed this wasn’t too awful in comparison.

“We heard that Sir Pheles was going to be helping you,” Paku commented when the silence started to stretch on again. 

The look on her face was gentle and sympathetic as she held Shiemi’s hand, who was standing towards the back of the group with Miwa. There were red rings around her abnormally dim eyes, and she was avoiding looking at him directly. He brushed off the hurt at that, and tried to focus on Paku’s statement.

“Yeah,” he said, fiddling with the shackles on his wrists. “It’s like, an exorcism or something. Shura’s better at explainin’ it than I am, but it’s this old ritual or whatever that’s supposed to get rid of demons. Since I’m half demon and all, it might hurt me, but apparently it’s a 50/50 chance, ‘cause my demon half was sealed away from me for so long.”

At that, another awkward silence settled over the group, but Rin knew what this one was for. His heritage was just one of the many secrets he’d been keeping over the past couple of months, and if they were anything like Suguro, then he could guess that they weren’t too happy about his secrets either. 

“I’m sorry for hidin’ so many things,” he said, when he couldn’t keep the words in any longer.

There were a myriad of expressions that crossed the exwires, each of them a distinct mixture of understanding, sadness, and frustration. Shima, however, was surprisingly blank. 

“Hey, man,” the other boy started off, though there was something almost imperceptibly tight in his eyes. “You gotta do what you gotta do.”

“Nobody’s required to tell everyone everything about themselves,” Kamiki added, something equally pinched in her words. “You’re entitled to your privacy.”

Suguro gave her a raised eyebrow, then looked back to him. “But maybe not for shit like this. No more of these death missions.”

Kamiki snorted. “Says the guy whose life goal is to kill S-”

“Don’t!” Rin cut in, panic setting his blood to ice. At the exwires looks of surprise, he grimaced, but knew that the explanation was long overdue. “He… he can sorta hear his name. It wasn’t bad before, but now he’s keepin’ an eye out, y’know?”

Even then, he could feel the telltale tingling at the back of his neck, the kind that meant that his birth father’s attention had been caught, anyways. Rin prayed desperately in that moment that his body would stay his — he’d never forgive himself if the exwires got hurt because of him.

“Can we talk about something else?” he asked, his smile painfully tight. Maybe, if they talked about something more mundane, Satan would get bored and disappear. “Shiemi?”

But he knew his choice was the wrong one when she looked down at him with teary eyes, and he could feel the twisting in his heart just before his vision trickled black. Rin grunted, but before he could even get a word out, he got that familiar feeling of vertigo, and the world in his eyes exploded into a shifting visage of shades of blue.

In what felt like both hours and yet only a handful of seconds, he could feel the familiar  _ shift-fall-click  _ of his consciousness settling back in. He blearily opened his eyes to see stone, once more, and sucked in a deep breath.

He’d failed, then. 

Now, the realization only brought him a deep sense of resignation, and tiredness. It made his shoulders feel heavy, and his chest felt tight as he looked up from the ground, expecting to see the familiar sight of Shura waiting to fill him in on what had happened while he was gone. He did see Shura, leaned against the wall with her arms crossed atop her chest, but he realized that they weren’t alone either.

No, just to the right of Shura stood Yukio, a tight expression of contained frustration and despair hidden behind neutrality. Rin looked away, his chest tightening further, only to realize that there was yet another person in the room with them. They were kneeling next to him, and he looked up the familiar set of legs to a well-worn black coat, and then to the kind, worn face of Shiro.

“Dad?” he breathed, stunned.

His father only nodded, a soft smile at his lips as he held his arms open. Rin looked up to him, eyes wide, and then felt a longing hit him so strongly that he damn near threw himself into Shiro’s arms, uncaring of the painful twist of the chains. He was hugged back so tightly that it almost hurt, but couldn’t find it in himself to complain.

Rin didn’t realize how much he’d missed his dad until that moment, and had to fight back the fierce sting of tears in his eyes. 

“I heard you’ve been getting up to a lot of trouble.” Shiro chuckled, reaching one hand up to ruffle his hair. Rin could feel the stumps of his missing fingers, and tried to ignore it, as he always did.

Instead, he let out a wet laugh. “Just like always.”

“Ha! Hardly! I’d say this is more than a little bit worse than your usual antics.”

“Yeah,” Rin said, his smile falling loose. “...I’m sorry about all of this.”

Shiro’s hand was warm against his back, however, where he patted Rin. When he pulled back to look up at his father, Shiro’s smile was gentle, yet sad somehow.

“There’s no point in cryin’ over spilled milk,” he said, brushing Rin’s hair out of his eyes. “What’s done is done, we just have to… deal with the hand we got, kiddo.”

Rin nodded, though the tension in his shoulders didn’t lighten any. There were a hundred thoughts buzzing in his mind, and now that he could share them with his father, he couldn’t stop himself from doing so. “Do you really think I’m gonna die?”

At that, Shiro hesitated, then sighed, closing his eyes. When he opened them again, he looked over at where Shura and Yukio stood, motioning them over with a hand. Yukio crossed the room to kneel down on the ground, sidling up against Shiro’s side, but Shura still stood by the wall.

“C’mon.” Shiro waved her over again, and Rin looked up to see something unreadable deep in her eyes. After another second, something gave way, and she made her way over to join them as well. She sat down across from Shiro, completing their little circle. Their picture felt complete for the first time in a long few weeks. 

“There’s really no good thing to say for this,” he started. “Sometimes life just sucks, and there really isn’t a good solution.”

“Real inspiring.” Shura snorted, picking at her knee.

Shiro pulled a faux offended look. “I wasn’t done!  _ Anyways _ , there are a lot of things in life that suck. Losing people is one of them. It hurts, and there’s no way to avoid that. You can’t stop people from dying, and sometimes it feels like that’s a good enough reason to stop keeping people around altogether. But it’s impossible to get through life alone. Losing people hurts, but having people is what gets you through it all. So…”

He looked each of them in the eye, gaze heavy.

“We’ll take this one step at a time, and deal with things as they come. No matter what happens, you’ll always have your loved ones to help you out.” Shiro reached out to take hold of Rin’s head, pulling him close and pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “You’ll be there for each other, and we’ll be here for you, Rin.”

And though his dad’s words were callous, they did make him feel better.

Even if only a tiny bit.

* * *

**“Back again, huh?”**

“Yep,” Shiro remarked, dryly. “And equally as uninterested in whatever the hell it is you have to say.”

Shura, Lewin, and Arthur were walking about behind him, carrying about jars of ink and paint brushes for the ritual. Shiro had been designated the official ‘Satan watcher’ after Rin’s body had once again been forcibly surrendered. He’d be angrier about it, if it didn’t mean that he got to watch the bastard squirm when he realized what exactly was going on, and how limited his time in Rin’s body truly was.

God, this was definitely worth dragging his aging ass out of his hospital bed.

**“Admit it.”** Satan’s sneer was somehow even uglier on Rin’s face, though he was beginning to think that he was just being petty at this point.  **“You’re just bitter that Yuri loved me, and not you! It’s pathetic!”**

“Sure,” Shiro replied, looking down at the nails of his three-fingered hand. Man, would he be excited to finally get his retribution for his fingers — trying to shoot with only seven fingers was an incredible pain in the ass.

**“Gragh! I just got this body, I won’t let you-!”**

To see his son’s body convulse in pain wasn’t something Shiro would ever rejoice in. But to hear Satan’s obnoxious squawking at Shura’s activation of the repression seal? Utterly priceless.

“Dad?” Yukio came to a stop beside him, brows drawn tight. “We’re ready to get started. Mephisto’s on his way.”

Ah, that meant that they only had a few minutes left, then. Shiro nodded, and then drew Yukio into a quick hug, giving him one last embrace before Yukio left the room. This was because of one of Mephisto’s caveats — he’d do the ritual, but only if he was alone with Rin. Shiro had managed to negotiate (read: bitch and complain) until the demon king reluctantly agreed to allow him to stay. Everyone else, though? They were being booted out.    
  
Yukio let go of him and turned to leave, clearly reluctant, just behind Lewin and Arthur. Shura was the last to leave, with a tender, worried expression on her face as she looked at Rin, even though it was Satan who glared back up at her. She turned to give Shiro one last look, then left behind Yukio, closing the room’s door behind her.

Which left Shiro and Satan alone.

**“Doing this won’t make Yuri forgive you.”** Satan spat.  **“For neglecting her or her kids!”**

Well, he already knew that. “Did it take you fifteen whole years to come up with that?”

Thankfully, he was saved from having to converse with the embodiment of asshole-ery any more by the light knock on the door. He glanced over at it, as did Satan, and the door creaked open to reveal a familiar demon poking his head in. Mephisto gave him a cheeky grin and a wave before stepping in, though Shiro was surprised to see that he wasn’t wearing the typical flashy costume he usually did. No, the suit he wore was still white, but much more muted in coloring, and Shiro couldn’t help but think that there must have been something ominous about that.

But as Mephisto closed the door behind him and took place next to Shiro, he remembered then that this was a meeting between father and son as well. Indeed, a sort of tension struck up when Mephisto glanced down at Satan, and though he wore the same smile as always, there seemed to be something sharper about this one.

“Good evening, father,” he greeted, surface-level chipper as always. “What a mess you seem to have gotten yourself into!”

**“Like you aren’t involved in this somehow,”** Satan retorted, scowling.  **“Is this your formal declaration of war? Nice of you to finally come out with it instead of sneaking around like a rat!”**

“Why, I can’t imagine why you would think I had anything to do with this! I had no idea that my younger brother was planning such a thing.” Mephisto laid a hand over his chest, eyes dramatically wide.

Satan grinned, something animalistic and angry in it.  **“No, I believe that first part, but not knowing? You can’t fool me.”**

“I’m flattered that you think so highly of me, but truly...” Mephisto bowed his head a bit, but Shiro could see the sincerity in his eyes, which only made him more confused. “If I had known of Rin’s plan, I certainly wouldn’t have allowed it to continue on this far.”

**“So what are you gonna do about it now, hmm? Don’t think I don’t know you have ulterior motives in this.”**

“My motives are your own, father.” Mephisto said with a smile that was utterly elusive. 

**“Bullshit!”** The chains that held Rin’s body to the ground rattled at an almost frightening volume, but held fast, and Shiro just barely caught himself before he let out a little sigh. Sure, he hated Satan more than most people, but that didn’t mean that he wanted to test his hand against the God of Gehenna so soon (and so undersupplied).  **“You’ve always been the awful child, you know that? I should’ve taken your older brother’s offer decades ago!”**

Shiro couldn’t help the glance over at the demon king — sure, the guy never took a damn thing seriously in his life, but even that had to hurt, right? But Mephisto’s grin only widened, and there seemed to be a sense of taunting finality about his expression. “Then I suppose you’ll have the chance to tell him so shortly, yes?”

And ohhh, the sight of Satan’s eyes widening with realization was one that made everything worth it. Just before the demon god could snarl something at them, Shiro grinned and absently turned towards the door. “Shura?”

He was really starting to like the sound of that screech.

Mephisto, for his part, hid his grin behind a handkerchief that he pulled from his breast pocket, turning amused eyes back at his suffering father. “How uncivilized. I have to ask, does young Rin happen to feel any of… that?”

Shiro shook his head. “No, he told Shura he can’t feel a thing when he’s not in control.”

“Incredibly convenient,” the demon mused, but his words quickly sobered Shiro up. The reminder of what exactly the ritual was meant to do weighed heavy on his shoulders, then, and he felt a pang of guilt for forgetting about it. It had been too tempting to be drawn up into Satan’s circle of drama again. 

“Do you need me to do anything?” he asked.

Mephisto raised an eyebrow at him, smiling. “Yes. I need you to stay quite out of the way, and to conveniently forget anything you might hear. If this technique were to be passed on to humans, I might have to arrange a few… well, a few accidents.”

At that, Shiro snickered. “Right. Caught the hint. I’ll stay out of your way.”

He turned away — though he really would’ve liked to see Satan finally be exorcised from his son — and made his way back to the corner of the room, looking up to the cieling and placing his hands on his hips as the sound of snarled threats and clattering ink jars echoed out. There was really nothing for him to do besides wait for the ritual to be done and Rin to be freed, so he found himself with time to think.

And time to overthink.

To the sound of chains clanking and murmurs in a language he couldn’t seem to quite grasp any words out of, he once again had the time to think. What if this ritual didn’t succeed? He knew the Order would see it as no great loss. Whether or not Rin survived the exorcism of Satan, Shiro knew they couldn’t care less so long as Satan was gone. On a purely professional level, it was ridiculousness; Rin was their greatest defense against Satan’s inevitable return.

But on a personal level? That was his son. And in a part of him he couldn’t bring himself to open up, he knew that this all was his fault. If he hadn’t gone so long without demanding the truth from Rin, if he hadn’t allowed himself to be possessed, if he hadn’t let Yuri die in the first place… it was an endless list of ‘if, if, if’ that only seemed to make things depressingly clear to him: on some major level, this was a result of his own failure.

Rin was a child, he didn’t know any better and hadn’t known any better. But Shiro was an adult, and knew he should’ve seen these signs, should’ve done more. It was all he could do to sit still and pray to a God he’d never truly cared for, just for the chance to let Rin live, because his son didn’t deserve to die due to Shiro’s own failures.

“It’s time, Shiro.”

He’d known the words were coming and yet had hoped, on some level, that they wouldn’t be spoken. He knew what came next, the risk they were about to take, the risk Rin had accepted. There were two outcomes.

Satan would be gone, but the question remained-

Would Rin be gone, too?


	22. and the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lord Almighty I really can't believe that this is the last chapter of rose glasses ;^; This fic has been my baby for so long, I really can't comprehend letting it go! I'm going to be saving my thoughts for a thank you chapter, but for now--thank you to everyone who's reading this! Thank you for letting me share a fic that I adore, and for receiving it so positively.
> 
> I'm endlessly grateful for you all <3

It was growing harder and harder for Yukio to contain his anxiety.

When biting at his nails didn’t work, he cracked his knuckles. When he no longer had any knuckles left to crack, he chewed at the inside of his mouth. When he tasted blood, he stood instead, and paced down the length of the hallway. And when he paced down the length of the hallway, Shura finally looked up from the floor and caught his ankle, forcing him to stop and look down at her.

“Kiddo, yer makin’  _ me  _ nervous.” Despite the joking tone, there was genuine concern in her eyes.

He couldn’t think of a response to that, his mind too swept up in  _ what if what if what if  _ to think of anything else. He could still hear soft talking back in the cell, so he supposed that Mephisto technically hadn’t started yet, but the very thought of what was soon to come was enough to have his stomach drawn up into tight knots that didn’t want to loosen for anything.

But she was looking at him expectantly now, and in some way, it was easier to follow orders (spoken or not) instead of obeying the whims of his own nervousness. So, he reluctantly stepped back to the wall that she was sat against, and slid down to sit next to her. Yukio drew his legs up to his chest and hid his face in crossed arms, trying to breathe even breaths in and out. 

Eventually, his thoughts rose up to a pitch feverish enough to make it impossible for him to keep it to himself. “What if it doesn’t work?”

He could feel Shura hesitating next to him, could sense her own nervousness in how she paused to answer. After a second, she let out a little sigh.

“Rin’ll either pull through, or he won’t,” Shura said simply, her voice quiet. “We won’t know until it’s done, but… seems kinda silly to give up on him before anything’s happened, hm?”

“I’m not giving up on him,” Yukio protested, though it sounded weak even to his own ears. “I just- I don’t want him to die.”

“You and me both, Yukio.”

There were no more words to be spoken after that. What could either of them have said? Rin was facing death, and nothing could ease that debilitating fear that he wouldn’t be able to pull out of this one. Instead, Yukio leaned his head on Shura’s shoulder, looking down at his arms as his thoughts once again raced with bad outcomes. A beat later, she leaned her head on top of his, gently, and it eased just a bit of his anxiety.

At least he wasn’t alone in all of this.

It was a long few minutes before they heard any more noise from the cell, and when something finally came, it was enough to have Yukio’s hairs stand on end. A scream cut out into the air, a demonic and angry one that was too warped to belong to his brother. But, it seemed to rise in pitch and tone until it  _ was  _ Rin howling in pain, and in the blink of an eye, Yukio was up and on his feet, eyes wide and hands shaking with the need to do  _ something! _

Then, the scream cut off abruptly, leaving a deafening silence in its wake. He could feel Shura at his side, but he felt too drawn tight with fear and apprehension to acknowledge her. His eyes were glued to the door, and nausea rose hot in his throat at just how long it took to hear anything at all.

The click of the door’s lock almost made his knees buckle, and when it opened, Mephisto stepped out, wiping his hands off with a pale pink handkerchief. He seemed at ease, though that didn’t necessarily mean anything;Yukio believed Mephisto could’ve been at ease even when faced with his own gruesome death. The demon king looked up at them, gave his typical grin, and stepped aside, waving a hand at the door.

Yukio didn’t hesitate a second longer. He couldn’t get inside the cell quick enough, eyes darting from side to side in the darkness in a desperate attempt to find his brother and father—and he did. Shiro was bent over Rin, holding him tight in his arms, but Yukio couldn’t see his brother breathing or anything. Shiro leaned his head up, tears in his eyes-

And gave them the biggest grin Yukio had ever seen.

It was only sheer force of will that kept his legs from giving out beneath him, but he couldn’t hold back the wet laugh that came from his mouth. Rin was alive.  _ Rin was alive!  _ He didn’t much look like it, sure, what with his head slumped over and his body limp, but his eyes were cracked open like they always were when he slept, and he was drooling all over himself, and it was just so goofy and so  _ Rin  _ that he laughed again.

Yukio dropped down to the ground beside them and Shiro opened up his arms, sweeping them both up into a tight hug as he chuckled along with Yukio. Shura joined them not long after, a relieved smile at her lips and tears in her eyes. 

“Enough to make ya wanna convert, huh?” she joked, and the three of them cracked up once again.

The noise was enough to have Rin rousing, a snort coming from his nose as he blinked awake. Yukio looked over at his brother, grinning wide enough to make his cheeks hurt as Rin sleepily looked up at the three of them.

“I miss somethin’?” he asked, voice raspy.

“God, that’s so like you.” Yukio sniffed, wiping at his eyes as Rin pulled himself up to sit properly. “You lived, stupid!”

“Oh,” Rin said, simply. Then his mouth widened into a tremulous little smile that only grew bigger. 

“Yeah, ‘oh’,” Yukio giggled, squeezing his brother tight. “Rin, don’t ever do this again, please.”

“You’re being too easy on him, kid!” Shiro pinned Rin down with a stern look, though it was nearly ruined by the smile pulling at his lips. “If you pull this again, I’ll kill you myself.”

“Make that two of us!” Shura scoffed. “Yer the worst kid I’ve ever had to teach, I’ll just have to drop ya if ya get more difficult!”

It was all in good fun though, and the four of them laughed together, so utterly overjoyed and grateful that Rin had lived that it was all they could do to giggle and cling close. 

“Well, I suppose that’s enough good deeds to last me through this lifetime,” an amused voice remarked. Yukio looked away from his brother to the other side of the cell where Mephisto stood, leaned against his umbrella with a cup of tea in hand. A saucer floated in the air just beside him, moving into place as Mephisto set the cup back atop it and released the umbrella to clasp his hands together. “I certainly hope none of you expect to ask me for any more favors in the near future.”

“Thank you, Mephisto,” Shiro said from next to him, as genuine as Yukio had ever heard his father say anything. “Truly.”

Yukio looked over at his brother, who was busy wiping the dried saliva off of his cheeks, and elbowed him harshly. Rin yelped and looked at him, but Yukio only motioned his head over to Mephisto, eyes expectant. Thankfully, Rin caught his hint.

“Uh, thank you,” he said to Mephisto, earning a satisfied smile from Yukio and the others.

“Don’t thank me too soon, you still haven’t heard my terms and conditions.” Mephisto’s voice was dry, but not malicious. “And don’t wander off too far, either, I do have words to share with you soon.”

“Ah, sure?”

Yukio shared in his apprehension, but he knew that none of them really had the right to deny Mephisto anything after the demon king had single-handedly saved Rin from certain death. Speaking of…

He looked to his father. “What do we do now?”

And wasn’t that the million dollar question? What would they say to the Order, to the Grigori? Would Rin continue with his classes? How does one really move on from a suicide plot, and mend those torn bonds? There was so much to do, so much to say and so much to correct that it almost felt like a cloud hanging over him.

But Shiro only reached a hand out to ruffle his hair, grinning. “You just let us adults handle that, alright?”

Yukio frowned at first—he was mature enough to participate, right? 

But at the thought of just… not having to make the decisions, a certain sort of relief washed over him. His frown eased, bit by bit, until he felt genuine enough to look back up at Shiro and give a tentative little smile.

“I trust you.”

* * *

It was a long while until Rin was finally able to track Mephisto back down again, and he was rather uncomfortable to learn that the demon king was still back down in the very cell that he’d almost died in. It was with reluctance that he made his way back through the Vatican and down into the dungeons, where he looked about the various hallways until he managed to find one that looked vaguely familiar. Even when he did find it, he half considered just leaving because he knew that whatever Mephisto was going to tell him, it wasn’t going to be good.

He was enjoying the freedom of his own head, the lightness of breathing now that his birth father wasn’t breathing down his neck, the tentative hope for the future and what awaited him next. He didn’t want anything more to do with the deal—all he wanted was to leave it behind. 

But he forced himself to open the door anyway and stepped into the cell to see Mephisto lounging idly in an unnecessarily fancy armchair. He had that same cup of tea in hand, but it wasn’t any less full, and floated by his side as the demon king glanced up at him.

“Rin.” he greeted, evenly.

“Uh, hey.” Rin waved a hand, nervous. “You said you wanted to see me?”

“I did.” Mephisto leaned his head on his hand, giving Rin a rather irritated look. “Do you have any idea how many centuries of planning you just jeopardized? Truly, boy, what a stupid plan to pull! You wouldn’t believe what all I had to do just to keep death from snatching you away from beneath my own nose! And my reputation! I’ve lost so much faith with the Order, thanks to you!”

Rin weathered the lecture with quite a bit of sheepishness, but a lot more confusion. “...I thought it was just the ritual?”

“The ritual,” Mephisto scoffed, waving his tea aside. “Please. Don’t tell me you fell for that farce as well.”

His mind blanked. “What?”

“A ritual to banish all demonic influence? Of course such a thing doesn’t exist—do you think I would’ve been able to keep it hidden from the entirety of humanity? Of course not.” Mephisto crossed his arms, brows furrowed in irritation.

“Then, uh, what  _ did  _ you do?” Rin asked, trying to fight down his confusion and apprehension. He had a feeling that Mephisto wouldn’t take too kindly to it.

“The solution was much more simple,” the demon king sighed, closing his eyes. “And a technique you should learn quickly, if you hope to survive long in a demon’s world.”

He blinked, stunned. “Wait- but, I thought the demon blood was gone?”

Mephisto only reached a hand up to rub at his eyes. “No, my younger brother, I cannot strip you of your ‘demon blood’. Even if it were possible, why would I give up someone such as you? You’re still the greatest chance I have against Satan in this silly war, I wouldn’t give you away so easily.”

“Then what- what?” Rin’s head was spinning trying to keep up with all of this. “How am I free?”

At that, Mephisto gave a self-satisfied sort of smirk. “Because you have a contract that supersedes Satan’s own, of course.”

“...huh?”

“It really is simple, Rin, try to keep up,” he sighed. “Your contract with Satan was of an elementary type- you both only promised one thing or event, with no thought put to loyalties nor exclusivity. The contract you’re in now is of a far more binding and refined make.”

_ Oh shit. _

“What contract?” Rin asked, hesitantly. He almost didn’t even want to know.

“Oh, don’t look so nervous. The contract you’re in now binds you to me,” Mephisto said, simply.

“To you?” Rin squeaked, eyes wide.

“Yes, to me,” the demon king repeated, exasperated, but still somewhat smug. “Although your new contract to me endangers you in no way, you really should take care to monitor the autonomy you give away. If I didn’t have a shred of empathy for you as my younger brother, I might’ve taken advantage of the permission you gave me.”

Rin almost could have smacked himself on the forehead. His dad would definitely chew him out for this.

But Mephisto only looked at his nails, entirely too nonchalant. “The deal essentially stipulates that you owe your life and loyalty to me, in exchange for saving you from certain death.”

“That’s your empathy?!” Rin spluttered. “You totally took advantage of my permission, or whatever!”

“Would you rather owe your life to me, or to our father?” Mephisto asked, dryly. When Rin only swallowed, the demon nodded, satisfied. “As I thought. And really, it’s not as if I intend to take advantage of what you owe me. I simply used the contract to force you to sever ties between yourself and father- you cannot give anyone, including him, what you owe me. With that, you cannot give anything I do not approve of.”

This was sounding worse and worse with every word that he heard.

“Again, don’t look so distressed. I have no intentions of babysitting you, Rin. Your life is your own, until I call upon you. Honestly, I’ve cut you quite a break with all of this.”

“And how is that?” Rin asked, shoulders slumping. He’d jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire, it seemed.

But Mephisto only raised a brow at him, grinning. “As far as anyone knows, you’re completely human, and I suspect that you have quite a few decades before anyone will realize our little trick. Supposing that you don’t expose yourself once again, you’re free to do with your life what you will.”

He wasn’t buying it, not yet. “Until?”

“Ah, smart boy! You  _ can _ learn!” Mephisto praised. “Until you do expose yourself, or the Vatican sees through our act. When you do, I only ask you to stand by the Order’s side once again in the fight against Satan. As I said, you  _ are _ incredibly valuable to me and the war effort, and I do expect you to fight by our side.”

“That doesn’t seem too bad,” Rin said, hesitantly. “That’s all?”

“That’s all!” Mephisto agreed, holding his hands open. “I do take pity on those contracted into my service, so you can expect fair treatment for as long as I am able to give it. There is no point in a pawn broken beyond repair.”

“Thanks?” Should he be grateful for that?

“You’re certainly welcome!”

“So, uh…” Rin fidgeted a bit, unsure of how to move forward with all of this. “What now?”

“That choice is up to you,” was all that Mephisto said. “You have a new lease on life, brother, and it’s yours to decide what to do with until I call upon you. Continue your education, find a new school, pick up a job, marry and settle down—I don’t care what it is that you do, so long as you stay in touch with me. Is that clear enough?”

Rin nodded, feeling a bit better about it all. Sure, it was… a dangerous situation to be in, and the thought of someone else owning his life was terrifying. But there was no changing it now, and there was nothing he could do but be grateful for what he was given. That, and hope that Mephisto was being truthful.

“You can leave, now,” Mephisto said, after a minute. “This little room is certainly apt for private conversations, but not much else. I expect that your family is waiting for you.”

At that, Rin couldn’t help the little smile that rose on his face. What had come out of himself, Yukio, Shiro, and Shura certainly wasn’t anything perfect—there were years long hurts and grievances that still had resolving yet to do, but… he was glad that he was able to live long enough to have them all again. They finally had the chance to fix things, and wasn’t it exciting to be able to see?

And the exwires, his classmates—he could be friends with them, and for real, this time. There was nothing holding him back from apologizing, fixing his friendships, reuniting and starting over and doing things right.

For once, he had a future ahead of him that didn’t end in immediate death, and in some way, it was overwhelming. His life was arguably his own, now.

And God, was he ready to live it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned another few hours or so for a longer thank you note! I'll be posting it as ch 23!


	23. thank you notes!

Hello hello! Ah it feels so weird to be typing author's notes in here, throws me back to the wattpad days of A/Ns in the middle of chapters lol! I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank everyone who made this fic happen! I can't really @ people on here, I don't think, so this will have to suffice.

The first thank yous go to Tizzie and WasInReality, who have been beta reading my fic since chapter one and have been encouraging me to keep going all the way until chapter twenty-two! I'm so grateful for their feedback and support, and this fic would not be how it is without them!

Thank you to Ivory, who put up with my late night calls asking if my plans for the plot were too angsty or too heavy sfhdsgfhd

Thank you to Rynoa, who read through my last handful of chapters and gave it the much needed spelling and grammar checks! To Tea as well, and to both of them for being sounding boards for a lot of my ideas for this fic.

To Riley, for listening to me talk about this fic for hours on end (lemme tell u, it ended up being like two straight hours of me just running my mouth).

To the Blue Exorcist discord, as well! I've been in that one since I first started posting these chapters, and the support and kindness there has kept me going!

Also, thank you to everyone who left a comment, particularly those of you who left comments multiple times, or even for every chapter! I'm so grateful for every message that pops up in my inbox, and every single time someone has shared their thoughts, speculation, or appreciation for this fic! I know it's a little silly, but this is the first long chapter fic that I've written, and it's exposed me to so many wonderful people and authors!

I won't drag this out super long, sorry, but I wanted to thank everyone! There are so many people who have made meaningful contributions to this fic, so it would be incredibly silly if I didn't thank them for that.

Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and criticisms would be very appreciated! I always love advice on how to grow as an author.
> 
> This chapter is brought to you by the support of the Ao no Discord Server, a discord server made by Blue Exorcist fans and for Blue Exorcist fans! It's a great community to talk about headcanons, ideas, fanfics, to share fanart and to talk to other people in the community! The fandom definitely isn't dead, and there are over a hundred of us keeping everything alive! Feel free to join and check things out! https://discord.gg/WnZ9Mw8


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